Living Legend : Book 6 : Untitled
by Cass Eastham
Summary: A transition story to get the gang from the 'End of the War' to the 'Beginning of the Jedi Academy on Iktri'.
1. LL6 00 Summary

**Dramatis Personae :** Luke Skywalker, Kess Lendra, Wedge Antilles, Yana Dietrich, Nik Lendra, Gina Lendra, Leia Organa Solo, Ren Entada, Tayla, Ben, Chewbacca, Threepio, and, as always, Artoo.

 **Rating :** M Mature. Language. Alcoholism. Prostitution. Adult Topics.

 **Length:** Full novel.

 **Summary:**

I'm writing this to keep the fingers on the keyboard and cleanse the literary palate between original projects. The ultimate *writer's* goal is to help the Jedi and family recover from that brutal war enough to establish them in a new home and routine - from which I can launch stand-alone novels and shorts with plots focusing entirely on the Jedi missions of the New Order.

There is some fun stuff in it, and a few life lessons, but LL6 is not going to win any awards. It is not yet edited, not really strong on plot, no real action sequence, no iconic antagonist, and no one dies. This one is about the Jedi and family overcoming everyday problems: alcoholism, PTSD, survivor's guilt, money, work, schedule, bureaucracy, bad habits, politics, jealousy, low confidence, and the frustrations of raising children; about missing the old gang so much that you don't realize you're already surrounded by a new gang, and that the best way to be a Jedi - even when you don't have any Force powers at all - is by pulling people closer and *making* them family.

* * *

 **Music**

LL6 Ch 1 - Tayla's Cheap Thrills / Running through the streets of Coruscant = "O Saya" from Slumdog Millionaire Soundtrack #1 by AR Rahman & M.I.A.

LL6 Ch 31 & 32 - Confessions/Tea & Pie = Hammock - I Could Hear The Water At The Edge Of All Things

* * *

 **Cast of Characters and their Living Look-a-Likes**

Luke = Mark

Leia = Carrie

Wedge = Dennis

Chewie = Peter

Artoo = Kenny

Threepio = Tony

Kess Lendra = Julia Stiles (not really a close fit, but she's the closest I can find)

Nik Lendra = Karl Urban

Yana Deitrich = (still looking) Amy Adams maybe? But quiet, serious, and shy.

Tayla = (still looking)

Gina Lendra = (still looking) She looks like Sam Baldwin's late wife in _Sleepless in Seattle_.

Ben Lendra = a seven-year-old Ewan McGregor/Mark Renton-in-training.

Garyn = Tricia Helfer (Number 6 on _BSG_ )

Ren Entada = Jack Davenport (Commander Norrington from _Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl_ (but not the what the character ended up as in the sequels))

Questah = Mayim Bialik (more like the actress herself than Amy Fowler of _The Big Bang Theory_ ) (Thank you, Reader Questah, for helping me create this character.)

Grand Moff Jakobi = Derek Jakobi (Senator Gracchus in _Gladiator_ )

Raól = the political-operative, secretary bad-ass from _Kalfona : Escape the Aviary_.


	2. LL6 01 Blank Canvas

The war was over.

And now the real work began.

Luke Skywalker sat in the middle of that naked, grassy field and tried to meditate.

The grass was Hobbiton green here. The flat expanse sparkled with wildflowers of violet, yellow, white, and neon orange. Facing due north, he took in the cleansing view of a purple mountain majesty, a snow-capped peak stretching into an azure sky. The field itself was nearly 10 kilometers of a north/south reaching oval, but the reservation borders reached beyond the sharp tree lines and out into the ocean by several more klicks in all directions. He had parked the little ship on the spit of beach below the cliff and climbed up to the field just so he wouldn't see it while he tried to meditate. But strolling and thinking for several kilometers in the grass, he finally sat down in the center of it all and turned his back to the beach anyway, as if he was trying to remind himself that lifeless sand was behind him and growing things were ahead.

It was Kess's idea to come out here. She said that with all the stuff cluttering their minds and their lives, it might help to come to the Jedi Reservation on Iktri and try to imagine what the Academy could look like. The idea had merit. With nothing yet here, Luke could stare at this 20 kilometre patch of untouched nature and meditate on it as a blank canvas.

But all his mind's eye could see was all the work they still had to do.

Dorms. Galley. Meditation chambers. Library. Students. Jedi records. Landing pad. Power. Water. Sewage. Communications. Watches to monitor that At'Bintar and Tyrona stayed in their own hemispheres. Archeological research of the severed Jedi Temple still crushed below the Imperial Palace. Students. Nik. Ben. Tayla. Leia. Leia's baby. Study philosophy and theology and psychology and history and mental disorders so he would know how to handle all these students. Finish furnishing the Jedi Offices in the Senate Dome. Pay Raol. Get that assistant an assistant. Make appearances at formal Senate functions. Corner Leia and make sure she was okay, make sure she was taking care of the baby. Download Artoo's memories of Anakin, Obi Wan, and Padme. Change the oil on the hopper. Eat the left-over asada out of the fridge before it went bad. Keep on mediating thousands of arguments between bickering factions so donations would keep coming in so they could afford it all...

Wedding plans.

Luke hitched an exhausted grin and pinched the bridge of his nose with his fingers. _Dammit, you're supposed to be meditating._

He gave up for a second and rested his elbows on his folded knees. He looked at a tiny violet flower in the grass in front of his knee, a baby trying to grow big and strong. He took a deep breath and looked around to the pines and mountains and beautiful sky.

A blank canvas.

There really was no such thing.

* * *

Tayla was no idiot. She figured it out why Kess Lendra was hanging out with her so much. She never quite understood the word 'Jedi' before all this, but she liked having the term to compartmentalize all this weirdness in her brain.

Three times this woman came and picked her up from the whore house after school just to go in town to hang out. She didn't understand why the boyfriend wasn't there too. After all, it was Luke Skywalker that Madam Saffron told her to go see about the voices in her head, but Kess alone came by, and always started the afternoon with a free snack, so Tayla wasn't going to argue with that.

There wasn't really any kind of interview, or plans, or 'training' of any kind. Not so far anyway. Kess asked her about generic things and Tayla gave her generic answers. But Tayla could sense there were bigger questions coming, and Tayla already knew she didn't want to have to detail _those_ answers. Still, three afternoons of small talk that danced around the real topic without actually landing on it was growing super boring.

They strolled up to the window of a comic shop to admire a display of figurines. An army of superheroes stood ready for action, fists high, capes billowing in the wind, colorful tights to show off the unrealistic musculature. "So what do you do for fun around here?"

Green eyes shifted over and narrowed. An odd grin spread across the girl's dark lips. "I don't know if you'd like it, though." It was a dare.

Kess met the gaze with strength. "Try me."

"Really?"

"Show me what you got."

"Okay." It sounded like a warning. "I'll be right back."

As Tayla walked with confidence into the comic shop, Kess watched her through the window. The girl strolled along the aisles as if looking for something specific. Kess grinned inwardly at all the unexpected research she had to do with this kid, like learning all the names and songs of that punk music group and learning all the slang words the whore-house kids had to use to describe workday of their parents without swearing. Now Kess wondered which of these caped cartoons would be her next research project. Yet, Kess had to admit it - _This must be loads easier than training a full grown adult._

She watched Tayla return the shopkeeper's greeting continued her stroll down the aisle. The girl walked right up to the same shelving that separated them. Kess grinned curiously at the girl through the window. _What are you up to?_

In a smooth flash, Tayla swiped a figurine off the shelf and shoved it inside her jacket.

Kess's eyes popped open.

Tayla turned for the door, easy and calm. So did Kess, yet the elder was prepared to stop the younger at the exit and demand Tayla either return the item or pay for it.

But Kess never got the chance. Tayla maintained her cool walk until she reached the door, but then she lunged through it, already in a full run by the time she crossed the threshold. The alarm blared instantly. Kess paused in a moment of dumbfounded shock. Big eyes watched the kid tear down the street, then glance over at the shopkeeper now glaring accusations at _her_. Insulted and angry, Kess pinched a face of a dark-sided fury and took off after the little shoplifter like she was going to rip the girl's throat out.

"Tayla!" Kess shouted. "Tayla, stop!"

But Tayla kept on going, laughing as she ran. Her sneakers pattered on the duracrete, jumping and dodging pedestrians going about their day, and oftentimes missing her mark. One woman yipped with such alarm that her food packets dribbled out all over the sidewalk. Kess's first instinct was to stop, help, and apologize, but she forced herself to keep going so she could catch up. Where Tayla dodged a land speeder, Kess nearly hit the hood. Where Tayla walked along a planter wall to get around the edge of street dining, Kess began to do the same but was blocked suddenly by the alarmed reaction of the patrons. With no safe direction to go without crashing into someone or something, she Force Jumped to an overhead railing and swung over the top of the last few heads.

In the middle of her run, Tayla tried to look back at what all the new shrieking was about, but she only saw Kess's angry face just as the Jedi landed hard on the duracrete with both combat boots and continue her full speed chase.

Now, Tayla was _really_ running.

Only three blocks away from the scene of the crime, Tayla shifted her sneakers to burn across the street and ducked into an alley beyond. By now, Kess was nearly stomping the girl's shoes off her heels to catch up. Just as Kess came close enough to grab the hanging cowl of Tayla's purple hoodie, the young girl came around the corner and landed her back against a dingy wall with a huff.

Kess stopped her feet in front of the child and shook her head. She didn't grab Tayla, but she kept her boots close enough to nab that purple hoodie in case Tayla launched away again. Kess heaved softly for breath while Tayla was gasping desperately for it.

As soon as Tayla realized Kess wasn't as angry as she originally thought, she opened her mouth and laughed some more. "Told ya it'd be fun."

Kess shook her head some more and drilled her eyes into the girl. "No, Tayla, that _wasn't_ fun. That was illegal. You're going to have to take that thing back."

Tayla scoffed and stood back to both feet. "You're loony! They'd arrest me again." She pulled the figurine out of that sparkle-adorned denim jacket and admired it.

Kess reached for her to hand it over, but Tayla jerked it back. "I earned it," was the girl's excuse. Keeping the gaze, she fumbled to put the figurine back into her jacket, but with the sparkly denim over the purple hoodie, and a black shirt with pockets underneath all that, she struggled to pick a pocket.

Kess flicked her wrist and opened a palm, and sucked the figurine through the air from Tayla's hand into hers.

Tayla's green eyes flashed surprise, but only for a split second, and glared back at Kess to watch the Jedi woman tuck the thing into her own pocket instead.

"Ain't gonna take it back." Tayla put her foot down. "I get any more tickets they gonna put me in juvie."

Kess closed her eyes and exhaled disbelief.

"'Sides, you do illegal stuff all the time," Tayla complained.

To this Kess, almost laughed, "Like what?"

"Trespassing. Insurgence. Murder. . . . They say you been spending your whole life committing crimes against the Empire. You prolly got a bigger rap sheet than me."

Kess almost argued. Almost. Her mouth opened, and then it snapped shut again. She angled a haughty head at haughty Tayla.

"I knows you been hanging out wit me cuz you wanna teach me Jedi stuff. I ain't got no problem wit that." Tayla said it like she was the disciplinarian speaking to the one who acted out. "But I gots one rule. Just one. And you _gots_ to follow it or I'm ghost."

Kess crossed her arms at her chest and tried not to grin at all this. "And what's that?"

"None'this, 'Do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do,' fodder." Tayla warned, complete with tilting her head back so she could look at Kess down the length of her nose. "I see you got skin-knees too. More skinned then Luke's even. You wants to train me, I'm there, but don't ever bang on me for stuff you done too."

Suddenly, the eleven-year-old street urchin had the strength of character as any rebel Kess had ever met. Kess recognized this child had earned some of her own dots already, and Kess was glad to respect that. With a quick nod of approval, Kess angled her head and put out her hand to seal the deal.

Green eyes squinted, uncertain.

"I vow I will not punish you for anything I've done myself," Kess promised with a solid gaze. " _You vow_ to let me train you as a Jedi and all that may entail."

To Tayla, 'all that may entail' meant travel! Adventure! Cool toys! Magic tricks! And maybe even real clothes and regular meals! The girl stood on both feet and shook Kess's hand hard, eyeing the woman's brown eyes with snarling-lip determination. Kess returned the shake with equal fervor and grinning snarl, yet with her free hand, she pulled the superhero figurine back out her pocket and handed it over to Tayla.

Uncertain, Tayla took it.

Eyes widened at the girl. "Now you're going to take it back."

"But you just promised-!"

"I've done a lot of things, young one, but I have never shoplifted. Let's go."

Tayla flattened her mouth, snatched the figurine out of Kess's hand, and turned to shuffle her feet back to the comic store with an exaggerated whine, "Yes, _master_."

As Kess followed the girl, a dark humor settled on Kess's forehead. Tayla, the child who accidentally represented the Girly Girls who were once Kess's rebel family, somehow represented each member of it. Tayla had Joanne's brown skin, Ashten's emerald hair, Yana's hazel green eyes, and close enough to Kayla's name that it was eerie. Only now did Kess realize she missed recognizing the attribute of the _fifth_ Girly Girl.

Shuffling down the street to follow the order, her mouth curled in displeasure, her shoulders sluggish, Tayla suddenly turned to whine loud. "How long this training gonna take, anyways?"

Kess pinched her mouth shut, tried not to laugh, tryied not to growl, and just motioned the girl to keep on walking.

* * *

Wedge leaned his elbows on the rail of the catwalk and looked down on Division One's new hangar. Only a month ago, these A-wings were fresh off the factory floor, but now they were damaged and blaster scarred from the Battle of Coruscant. Their trusty old X-wings were in the next hangar over - in pieces - and slowly becoming even more pieces as droids broke them down to recycle the metals.

Commander Antilles reviewed his new team trying to work together. What was once the twelve best fighters of the rebellion - 'Rogue Group' - was now doubled in size to 24 fighters, but only six of the original pilots remained with the crew. Seven more pilots were re-assignments from other parts of the Alliance. The remaining eleven were former Imperial TIE fighter pilots. Reformation was the goal, so the idea behind this reorganization was to force Alliance and Imperial to work side-by-side and help put the broken government back together again.

The other half of his crew was also nearly split down the middle with Imperials and Alliance. Yet in Rogue Group's case, 100% of the repair engineers had to be replaced.

Division One was hardly a shadow of what Rogue Group once was.

Wedge understood the theory. Integration was key to healing the wounds of this war, but practical application of that theory was like throwing dire wolves and mini dragons in the same pit and expecting them not to try to eat each other.

"You're not actually going to desecrate the Imperial Crest without first waiting for your provisional government to design a new icon, are you?" Commander Garyn's natural voice was cool and sweet, but it always seemed to come with it a cutting note.

Wedge glanced over his shoulder at his new second in command. She'd be hot if she weren't such a bitch. The thin woman stood several inches taller than himself, with pale blond hair trimmed tidily at the ears. Her crystal blue eyes watched the crew removing the black and white signage from the far wall of the hangar. Her full red lips twitched with disapproval at the symbolism of this moment. And her flawless complexion seemed to glow like white ceramic out of the sharp cut / dull gray of her Imperial officer's uniform. She was so pale that her skin looked . . . raw.

 _"Have you ever tried it raw?"_ As Wedge turned his eyes back to the view below and beyond, the corner of his mouth curled a little to remember when the 'girly girls' teased him, back on Yavin 4, back when they were all still alive, back when he still had a repair crew.

Wedge sighed long and slow.

He didn't bother to correct Garyn because she'd figure it out soon enough. She clenched her jaw to watch the Rebel half of the crew carefully removing the three metre sign from the hangar wall, and her thin hand came to the rail as the Imperial half of their team began unpacking the red and white signage of an Alliance Fleur Dis Lis.

Garyn's mouth parted with growing insult. Wedge knew what she was thinking but he didn't bother to correct her. She'd figure it out soon enough. So would the rest of them.

Looking over the crew below, it was all too easy to tell which were Imperials and which were Alliance because they were all still wearing the same old uniforms. Khaki and army green always clustered together, and always seemed separated by an invisible wall to avoid mingling with the black and gray who always clustered together. Now, with both symbols lying on the deck between rows of broken A-wings, Black and Gray looked up at him just as puzzled as the khaki and green did.

Wedge reached an arm out and pointed at the Rebels to get to work on the Imperial crest they'd just removed. "Get a sheet metal saw and cut it in half."

Garyn's throat made a noise, but she trapped it in a pair of quivering lips. Down there, the black and gray uniforms stirred like a pack of disturbed dogs, cringing with disgust to watch the display. Once the red Alliance crest was sliced in two from top to bottom, Wedge motioned and called out again. "Now hand it to them. You guys cut the other one in half."

Wedge recognized the real problem here. Coruscant and her new government needed planetary security immediately while it was still learning to stand on the strength of its new feet. Integrating Alliance and Imperials onto the same crews made logical sense, but until the new Senate designed a new icon to symbolize the reformation-until they were all wearing the same uniforms-they would continue to sneer across the hangar at each other as enemy crews.

But designing new signage and uniforms were the least of the Senate's worries right now, and Wedge decided that Division One couldn't wait for a visual icons.

Garyn stood in silence and Wedge in patience as the two signs were sliced in half by their enemy forces. Once done, Wedge called out to order the crowd one more time. "You guys take one side of that one, you guys take one side of that one, and hang them both up right where it was before."

He watched different members of both gangs realize what he had in mind. Many seemed to accept this solution; many more were spitting nails at the desecration of their banners. It took some time, but Wedge and Garyn watched the whole thing from the balcony in silence. The right half of the black Imperial gear and the left half of the Alliance red fleur dis lis were spot-welded together and hoisted back up to the far wall of the hangar. The seam gluing them together was far from perfect, but that made the symbolism of it that much more fitting.

Wedge stood on his feet and began to turn away to other business when a pilot called up from below. "What do we do with the other halves?"

This much should have been obvious. "Pack them up and take them over to Division Two."

Turning, he noticed Commander Garyn's rippling jaw of anger underneath a porcelain - _raw_ \- complexion.

 _"New project!" They had all crooned._

Wedge pinched his grin away and marched to other business.

* * *

"Say the word that comes to mind when you see the image on the screen," they told her.

Yana sat upright in the exam chair with green eyes wide open like she was trying to use the Force. A half dozen med droids worked around and behind her, plugging little pins to parts of her head neck and upper chest. A sterile bandaged contained her long auburn hair over her left shoulder, but the right side of her head was shaved below the temple line. They pinned sensors to the side of her skull, adjusted the equipment . . . and waited.

Two sentient doctors stood in front of her in lab coats with big data folios in their hands, but they each stood beside the screen on which Yana focused so intently.

"Try to relax," one said. "This isn't a test; it's an assessment. We're just trying to get an exact definition of where the damage is."

Yana nodded vaguely, but it still felt like a test. She stared at the image on the screen and pressed her mouth together, but the word wouldn't come out. "B-b-b-b. . . . B-b-b-b. . . ."

 _Bed! It's a bed! Why can't I say bed!?_ Yana huffed and slammed her eyes shut.

"Easy. Relax. You're not going to get them all. Try again."

A new image.

Yana cleared her throat, determined. "C-c-c-c. . . ."

 _It's a damn cat!_ She yelled in her mind.

"Very good."

 _No, that wasn't good. That wasn't good at all._

Another image.

She rubbed her lips and tried to force them to work. "S-s-s-st . . . s-s-s-st . . . . s-s-s- _star_."

"Well done, next."

It was a fighter. The word sounded clearly inside Yana's mind the instant the image popped up. She knew what all this stuff was. Her intelligence was still in there, the words just couldn't make it to her mouth.

"F-f-f-f. . . f-f-f-f . . . ."

She was trying too hard. She knew it. She took a deep sigh and dropped her head back, granting herself a moment of mental exhaustion, and whispered, "fuck."

Yana flashed a sad smile and began a tired laugh.

"Try again."

Another image. . . .

And so it went on. There was no word she could speak without stuttering, and most words never found her mouth at all. By the time the assessment was over, Yana was as exhausted as she was despondent by the results.

But the doctors showed her the readouts as if it was good news. The pointed to the digital imagery of her skull and raved at how small the damage was, but all Yana could see was the bits that were missing. They showed her the solid green metrics of writing and reading abilities, cognitive, small motor skills, large motor skills, and raved at how well she was doing. All Yana could see was that the entire language skills section was red.

Even as they talked about what she could do, and how she could work around what she couldn't do, the accomplished data admin looked at the macro-vision of it all and made her own assessment. A chunk of Yana's gray matter was just, plain, _missing_.

And gray matter doesn't grow back.

Yana choked on tears of helpless frustration.

"There are implants," the doctors explained. They gave her a few options on what kind of implants she could have that would work around the damage. Having an implant to help her speak would free her to return to the social world, to use commlinks, have conversations with friends, and even chat with strangers. But neuro-prosthetics always involved software, and software could always be hacked, and data administrators with top secret clearance could not be 'hack-able'.

Yana stared at the digital image of her damaged head and saw the macro-vision of the greater truth. She had two options; her career . . . or a life.

* * *

Regit left the place hours ago, and today's pod races were over, but Nik remained at the bar alone. At first, he opted to stay to finish his beer, then he opted to have one more before he went home. On a weeknight light this, few people filled the place. It was fairly quiet. Even the vid in the corner was muted again now that the sports were done. The waddling creature came down to him every ten minutes or so and offered a refill. "Just one more." Nik would say, and the tender didn't comment that Nik said 'just one more' that last two times too.

He closed his eyes and his head swam a little, a familiar feeling, taking his control away from his thoughts. He knew he should probably go home, but he enjoyed this swimming lucidity a little too much. This is where he mind could float free of thoughts, where his subconscious seemed to shut up, where he could relax enough to rest. Being drunk was like a conscious sleep. His emotions could wane. His fears slipped away forgotten. After a few beers, Nik wasn't a chemical grunt, a father, a husband, a son, or a brother . . . and he certainly wasn't an untrained Jedi hopeful, nor the momentary Emperor who, for a whole month, was drugged, tortured, paraded around like a prize slave, who-as soon as he was free to make it all stop-pissed off half the blasted galaxy with his cease-fire.

He faced a little fame and the problems therein when he first got home, but not much. As soon as the neighborhood learned that he inherited no money and retained no political power, they all quickly left him alone. A few others lingered on to press him for his contacts, but Nik looked at them all like they were nuts. "Well _sure_ I met the Chamberlain and a few others, but it's not like they gave me their comm link numbers."

"And your sister?"

To this, Nik always ended up grinning wryly at the generous offer for the true power play that it was. "Leveraging me so that I leverage my Jedi sister is only going to get you 'leveraged' right down on top of your head."

Nik was sure the offers and power plays would never entirely come to an end, but they'd slowed enough to a manageable degree. And thank goodness for that. Gina was trying to regain control of her classroom and Ben was trying to get the swing of things again at school. It had all been too much of an adventure for the little struggling family.

And yet, even with things seeming to calm down, Nik found solace in coming to the bar to knock down a couple and 'meditate' in a soft swimming intoxication. It was as if he were still recovering from something, or hiding from something. He knew he had to whip his ass into shape and get back to the business of living, but he wanted one more evening to relax his mind at the bottom of a glass. He'd do it tomorrow. _Not today. I'll get my ass in gear tomorrow._

The tender waddled down to his near empty-glass, to which Nik sucked down the last of it and shook his head. He had to go home and face his mundane existence. He turned from the stool to go, but something caught his eye.

The vid in the corner, still muted, had switched to an advertisement of the white sand beaches of touristy Nekisa. The clip was the video of couples swimming in the deep ocean, wearing re-breathers, and playing with a colorful school of fish. The images switched to others swimming in the sea, to underwater lounges with little kids pressed to the glass walls to ogle sharks swimming by, to a woman blowing air out her nose as she swam through the water towards the light.

But the scene cut to something else before she made it.

Nik began to choke. He coughed. He cleared his throat. He grabbed the edge of the bar to keep his balance, sitting down again before he fell over entirely. He rubbed his eyelid with his fingers for a long moment . . . then tucked the glass over to the tender. "Just one more."

* * *

Gina sat at the kitchen table and tried to concentrate on her work, but her eyes kept going to the wall chrono. This was the third time this week he was late to come home from work. At first, Gina was warm to let him go out and party in his usual form to recover his horrors, but now it was turning into too much of a habit. She knew where he was, it wasn't like he was hiding or having an affair, but the more time he spent at the pub, the drunker he would be when he finally got home. If this continued, it would be long before Nik Lendra woke up with hangovers that would affect his job, and soon after, there would be drinking at home, then drinking alone. . . .

Gina kept it together as best she could. Ben seemed unaffected by the adventure, thank goodness, and returned to his seven-year-old swing of things. Gina returned to her own classroom without too much trouble. The substitute maintained the curriculum fairly well in Gina's absence. If only Nik could get over his secret terrors and get back to a normal life too.

Finally, she finished grading the last of the homework, and collected the datacards in her work tote. Checking the chrono one more time, she tucked her black hair behind her ear and moved through the living room to the patio door. Outside, where night shrouded all view of the ridge beyond, Ben stood in the sand a with a remote control and watched the air where his toy fighter flew through the sky.

The house lights glowed dimly on his back, making him look like a glowing silhouette in the dark of night. Gina couldn't see the fighter, but she didn't look for it either. Ben's eyes were sure to be fixed on the tiny red and white lights to keep track of where in the blackness it was. The tiny thing whined and zipped overhead like a giant bug.

"Time to come in now."

"Is dad home?"

"Not yet."

"You said I could stay out here until he came home."

"Well he's not home yet, and it's time to come in now."

"Just give me a few more minutes."

"No, Ben."

"Come on, Mom, you said I didn't have to come in until dad came home."

Gina was tired, worried, and considered going out to the pub to fetch Nik after she got Ben to bed. It felt like the fabric of her family was unraveling in her palms. "I changed my mind."

"Fine. One sec."

"No. _Now_." In a rush of frustration, Gina stomped up behind him and snatched the remote out of his hands.

"No!" Ben yelped. His eyes grew big to watch it, and Gina listened to it. For a split second, the toy fighter sailed straight until it smacked hard against the wall of the house.

Ben's face flushed red. His eyes watered with wrath. His fists balled beside his hips. He growled out in a childish temper tantrum.

At first, Gina simply sighed and wished Nik were home to discipline this, but her eyes flashed open when her body was shoved backwards. She landed against the back door with eyes wide open and saw a half-dozen patio things spray away from Ben in all directions.

Ben looked just as shocked as she was. His big eyes looked around at why the barbecue tongs went flying, why the table glass crashed against the wall, why the sand blew away from him as if by wind, but in a perfect circle as if he himself were the tiny meteor to hit the ground.

With one palm splayed against the wall behind her, Gina found her feet, but couldn't close her mouth. She watched her young son, innocent, ignorant, and now a DNA-proven-relation to Obi Wan Kenobi, flit his brows with confusion and look over her for answers. "What was that?"

* * *

Leia stood in her new apartment on the top-most floor of a tower. From the curved window in the living room, she could look out at a 45 degree angle to the right and gaze on the Senate Dome. From the 45 degree angle to the left stood the dark pyramid of the Imperial Palace. When they offered to prepare the place for her, she made the mistake of dismissing her input onto its decor. What she got was _not_ what she would have picked. As if an attempt to reflect the harsh digital existence, the suite was adorned with harsh black lines and soft white curves. Like an Escher painting, it was hard to tell if the malleable, welcoming Alliance was infesting the strict Imperial geometry, or was it the other way around. The apartment certainly displayed the symbolism of her new position however, so Leia forced herself to accept it.

She stood at the window, this time, looking out at the distant Imperial Palace, and thought about her biological father. Her palm smoothed over the small but swelling belly beneath the rich blue robe, absently comforting and reassuring the child that everything would be okay, as much as she was subconsciously trying to reassure the same for herself.

Behind her, the main door slid open. Threepio's gears whispered into the room. "Good evening, Chamberlain. I have Chewbacca's effects, as instructed."

Leia turned to see the gold droid remotely controlling a repulsor pallet into the suite. The dinged crates and stuffed duffels of what looked look like a homeless person, complete with a fine layer of brown shedding, further disrupted the White Alliance/Black Imperial decor of the apartment.

It made her smile. "Leave it in the first bedroom, but don't unpack any of his things. I want him to pick which room he wants to be his."

"As you wish, Chamberlain. And, if I may, shall I unpack Captain Solo's effects?'

Leia lifted her chin and inhaled a deep breath, but it didn't help keep the sorrow at bay. The sour loss swelled in her soul as though she just swallowed a lime, like a big sour lump now settling behind her ribs. "N-no." She told him, then collected herself quickly and rubbed her belly again. "No, I'll do that." She pressed her lips, and they trembled. "Thank you, Threepio. You may shut down for the night."

"Good night, Chamberlain."

"Good night. Threepio."

As Threepio turned one way to command the repulsor pallet down one hall, Leia turned and disappeared down the other. The room was too big; the bed too empty. She closed the door, turned down the lights, kicked off her shoes, and crawled sideways onto the black and white bedspread.

Alone. Finally, thankfully, alone . . . so she could do this.

Leia wrapped one arm around her pregnant belly, splayed the other hand over her hiding eyes, and burst into tears.

* * *

Luke sat in the middle of that naked, grassy field and gave up on trying to meditate.

The pain and struggle of this war's aftermath was too palpable, even from out here.

Instead of imagining what the Academy would look like, his mind digressed to what advice Master Yoda would have for him right now. He envisioned the short green creature standing in that 'blank canvas' field in front of him, but Luke knew Yoda wasn't going to show up with words of wisdom this time. If Yoda did have input, he wasn't going to share it with Luke. The old Jedi order was broken. Very, extremely, irreparably broken. So the only trustworthy way to fix it was to tear the whole thing down to the nub and build it back up from scratch.

Blank canvas.

But there was no such thing.

In his imagination, Yoda stood in that grass larger than life; so tall that his wrinkled head and pointed ears nearly reached the height of the mountain peak. Tattered robes in a flow of frozen action. Lightsaber blade in his three-fingered hand behind him. The other open hand high in the air as if commanding the Galaxy to _calm the fuck down_.

After all they had done, after all they had lost, after all they went through . . . the war was finally over.

Luke rubbed his face with both palms and grunted.

Wars were easy compared to this crap.


	3. LL6 02 Leia's Office

Kess was feeling a little feisty, and she had to practice her skills anyway, so the minute she crossed the threshold to the Senate Chamberlain's office complex, she stepped aside and made herself scarce. She had no official business being there, but she probably wouldn't get in trouble if she got caught. Though she'd only visited Leia's new offices once so far, Kess was sure everyone she would run into would likely already know who she was.

Dressed in brown pants, tall brown boots, and bone colored tunic, she probably looked more the part of a traditional Jedi than Luke usually did, but this gave her the added benefit of blending in a little better with the regular office staff who didn't dress up in fine robes or uniform-looking get-ups. With the Senate not in session today, political operatives were thick as flies in here, talking on commlinks, writing speeches, reading security reports, or standing in clumps in deep discussion on how to get something done. Even if Kess hadn't clouded their minds as she passed, she wasn't sure if they would have noticed her anyway. The Purple Guard should have been a different matter, but Kess noticed the guards saw her and recognized her before she succeeded in a mental subterfuge, and yet they didn't blink an eye to just let her walk in.

Still, the inner offices were a little different. Everyone was hard at work, even in Leia's grandest office at the far end of the hall. The big double doors were wide open to show the immensity of the main desk. The twin couches and guest chairs were loaded with staff, all taking notes and discussing status reports with the Chamberlain sitting behind her desk.

Kess sidestepped out of view before Leia could look up. She skirted the outside corners of the meeting rooms, lobbies, and staff offices until she poked a sneaky head into the data library.

Threepio saw her first and Kess quick hushed him with a finger to her lips and a wink. The gold droid did a double take, realizing her intent quickly as Kess snuck up behind Yana and covered the other woman's eyes.

Yana paused briefly, pulled the hand from her face, and turned with a smile. She shook her head and shook her finger in a silent scolding at Kess for bugging her at work, but she was sparkling happy about the visit itself. She peeked around the corner to verify the meeting was still in progress, then grabbed Kess and pulled her deeper out of risky view.

Face to face, eyes bright, Kess didn't say anything because she knew Yana couldn't. The old roommate had half her brown hair shaved off her head for the surgeries, and now wore a long teal wrap tightly over her scalp, part bandage/part embarrassment for the missing hair. The bright color of the cloth made her eyes look that much greener, and her pale complexion reminiscent of a porcelain doll.

Yana lifted an index finger for Kess to pause her words and reached into her tunic pockets to pull out a pair of datalinks.

But Kess stopped her efforts with gentle hands. What she came to announce didn't need speech or text. As soon as she had Yana's attention, she reached up to her neck with one hand and began to fish out the wedding locket from her tunic.

Yana smiled at the first sight of the black string. She rushed to pull the datalinks out anyway so she could say something.

Before the locket came out of her collar, however, something on the Force alerted Kess's attention. She had been spotted. People were suddenly paying attention to the two women in the corner. Kess saw a small knot of chatting staff had stopped their conversation to stare. Another staffer paused a call in suspense at this development. Then Leia herself stepped down the center aisle of the workstations until she reached the angle to have a clear view of the data library and the two people in it.

"Oh shit." Kess murmured as she stuffed the string back under her collar, pretending quickly that she had only been scratching her ear. She smiled big, sweet and guilty as she stepped out to the main room to greet the Senate Chamberlain and future sister-in-law.

As a back-office workday, Leia wasn't dressed in the fluffy garb of facing the Galactic Senate, but she still looked rich and official in a royal blue jumpsuit and long black vest. The woman was so small and skinny that her belly clearly plumped out with child, but her body was straight and strong, handling everything about her world with the skill of a superhero.

Kess felt the woman deserved to have her own comic figurine, complete with a flowing cape.

Several staffers watched from behind Leia's open office doors to see what interrupted their meeting. Others stopped their tasks to pay attention why Leia came out of her office. As Kess stepped out of the data library and Yana stepped out at her flank, Leia lightly clasped her hands in front of herself and lifted a brow. "Jedi Lendra," she smiled, and her voice was warm honey, "How kind of you to stop by."

 _Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit._ Kess thought hard and fast but maintained her pleasant smile and nodded. "Chamberlain, it's good to see you again . . . but, actually, I came to see her." Kess squinted an eye and thumbed over her shoulder at Yana, adding with a wince. "No offense."

"None taken," Leia assured warmly, and then lifted her chin a little too high, eyeing Kess with a powerful gaze and a humored spark. "Get your ass in my office."

Kess glanced back at Yana, sighed audibly, and nodded at her fate. "Yes, mayam." Without a hitch, Kess marched past the Chamberlain to follow the order.

Leia didn't move right away. Shining brown eyes now landed on Yana. "You too."

Yana bowed her chin and rushed in behind.

Inside Leia's giant spread, Kess looked over the waiting staffers with a genuine apology. "Sorry to interrupt."

Leia stepped around her desk with a gentle order. "May I have the office, please." Questions murmured, and Leia sat down with a clear assurance. "We'll resume in few minutes. This won't take long."

Staffers filed out, Kess and Yana crept in, and Leia offered the front guest chairs. "Please. Sit." Leia sat down the same time they did. Although her mood seemed light, she leaned her elbows forward on the desk in business mode. "Have you and Luke received your invitations to the Senate Ball?"

Kess blinked to bring her mind to the topic. "Uh, yes we have. I'll make sure we fill out the RSVPs tonight."

"Good." Leia turned her eyes to Yana, "If I could ask you a personal favor?"

Yana blinked and shrugged. _Sure. Anything._

An index finger came out of Leia's hand and pointed. " _You_ take _her_ shopping for a gown."

Yana tossed her head back and laughed.

Kess whined a new smile. "Awe, man."

Leia tried to contain her own grin to insist it. "No Jedi uniforms. No rebel uniforms. And no looking like homeless monks like the old Jedi Order used to do. It's a formal event and I expect you both to wear formal attire for it."

"He's not going to like that," Kess warned.

"I don't care what he likes." Leia said strongly, smiling more. "When you're on my turf and you guys are going to play by my rules."

Kess cleared her throat and nodded obedience. "As you wish."

Leia nodded at her desk with a new sigh. "Next order of business. . . . " A brown eyeball shifted over and drilled into Kess.

"What?"

Leia cocked her brow expectantly. "Is there something you need to tell me?"

Kess's head hung sideways and a breath of grinning regret escaped her throat. She glanced at Yana, who was now scrunching a smirking face as if to brace for a blow. Kess eyed Leia again and didn't bother to wonder how Leia found out about it.

The powerful gaze on Kess might have been misconstrued as some kind of Jedi Power Trick if anyone else saw it, but all Leia needed was a kind-grinning stare.

Kess sighed in defeat. "I was going to let him tell you."

"I haven't seen him."

"Well, everyone's been so busy-"

Leia waved that off as she rolled her shoulders back. She clasped her hands together and leaned one elbow on one armrest, but the powerful gaze was still intense. "When did he ask you?"

"Just a few days ago. We're trying to keep it out of the press until we have answers to the first round of questions."

Leia was on board with this. "What questions?'

"When. Where. Will there be babies. Stuff like that."

Leia blinked slow and smug, "And?"

"Well if I knew the answers already-!"

"I'm just asking what you have so far," Leia assured with a shake of her head.

"Oh, well, probably . . . after the academy is built, _at_ the academy, and . . . I don't know yet."

Leia's eyes lowered to her desk in thought.

Kess shrugged in defense, "This all just happened a few days ago. He and I haven't had a chance to talk about any of this."

"No, I'm sure you haven't. But," Leia lifted her face at an angle, eyes warm, mouth grinning, "For what little vote I have in the matter, I would approve of babies."

Kess nodded with discomfort, yet met Leia's gaze with respect. "Consider your vote tallied."

Leia nodded conclusion and pushed out of her chair. "How the academy coming?"

"It's a mess right now but . . . one step at a time. Y'know?'

Leia stepped around her desk to show them out, and Kess and Yana got up to leave, but Leia motioned her to pause. "Can I see it?"

Kess gladly fished the wedding locket out of her tunic and let it hang by the black string around her neck. Leia's eyes changed to look at it. This wasn't just a symbol of a marriage proposal, or of her brother finally securing some lifelong company, or even a hope that breeding of more Jedi was on the horizon. Leia thumbed over the carved designs on the two knots of fused bone with a lingering gaze, and Kess felt the woman's heart wither with lament.

The last time Luke saw Han was when the man handed half the locket to him, back on Yavin 4 before the launch. The Tatooine bone nugget was a secret gift from Solos as a familial approval in case Luke was thinking about it. Through others, Kess learned the last time Leia saw Han was only a few minutes later that very same day, when Han reported to his wife that Luke took the gift with a smile.

Leia let the moment pass and met Kess's eye. "Welcome to the family."

It wasn't until that moment that Kess truly realized the 'family' of which she was about to become a member. The air hollowed from her chest to envision Darth Vader as a father-in-law. _And I thought my dad was bad._

Leia half turned to eye Yana, but asked Kess. "With your permission, I'd like your Best Lady to keep me informed of the developments through back channels. Let me know if you need anything."

Kess flicked her eyes to Leia's belly and nodded in heartfelt agreement, " _You too_."

"Oh, I will." Leia stressed a new smile, then shifted to usher the two women out. "In fact, if you could pass a message on to Luke for me?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"Tell him," Leia thought for a moment as if just now making the final decision on this. "Tell him her name will be Breha."

A slow smile spread across Kess's face. A baby girl! She bowed with Jedi respect and nodded. "Will do."


	4. LL6 03 Jedi Kids

A dozen things needed her attention, and Kess wasn't sure how she was going to resolve half of them, but the day was essentially over. As a symbol to remind her that it was time to stop for the day, Kess began to unravel the braid rolls from the back of her head as she rode the elevator to the house.

It was growing more comfortable to come home to the black and sand home on the fourth floor. Not fancy, not junky, not ostentatious on the top of some tower, not down in the grubby levels under Coruscant's lively surface - just _functional_. Technically, the place was to serve as a way station for all the Jedi when they happened to be in town for Senate functions. Until they built the Academy, until they had apprentices running around that they needed to keep close, this place had become a starter flat for a starter couple.

She found Luke sitting at the corner of the long dining table when she came in. He hunched over a scattering of datapads and cards with fingertips rubbing hard against his eyes. That end of the table had become a second desk for them, where they often sat across from each other to sort out Jedi Academy plans. Now the clutter there seemed permanent. (When they ate at home, they sat across from each other at the other end of table.) Sensing his stress, Kess set down the bag of fruit she had picked up from a street vendor and stepped behind his chair. Without a word, she set her hands on his shoulders and dug in her thumbs.

Luke let out a little moan of appreciation and fell back in the dining chair with relief. Kess massaged his muscles for a minute longer, eyeing the shape of his shoulders under the powder blue fabric of his shirt. She thought about comic figurines with unrealistic musculatures and superheroes with capes, and she grinned. Coming home to this suite was one thing, but coming home to _him_. . . . Kess felt like she won the grand pot of a lottery.

Before he got too comfortable with it, Luke stretched his neck, and Kess pulled away to sit down in the dining chair next to him. She watched him sigh over all the work and lift an eyebrow at her. "You know what we forgot?"

"What?"

"Infrastructure." He waved a hand at all that was in front of him. "Water. Power. Sewage. Roads. . . . We've got every building we need to get started, but they can't break ground on any of it until we get the infrastructure set up."

"What's that going to do to the time table?"

Luke shook his head. "Puts us at a dead stop until we solve it."

Kess flicked her brows at the problem. "It's tempting to just slap down a ready-made colony ship."

"Yeah, but the At'Bintarians and Tyronans would never go for that. And a colony ship wouldn't sustain us for long anyway."

"I was kidding actually."

He grinned and shrugged a brow.

She propped her head in her palm on the tabletop and fidgeted with her braid-kinked hair. "Can I ask you a weird favor?"

Luke was glad to take a moment and solve something easy. He set his elbow on the tabletop and propped his head in his palm too. "What?"

Kess cringed at the air, trying to figure out how to word this.

Invisibly, his boot lightly kicked her boot. "What?"

"Yana is really struggling with this speech impediment thing, so I have an idea to get some books on sign language and practice with her, just to give her an action plan. Plus, Leia wants her to take me shopping for a gown for this Senate shindig coming up. . . ."

"So? What's the favor?" Suddenly his brows wrinkled like she was nuts. "You're not asking me permission to go out and play, are you?"

"Oh, _heck_ no!" she yipped.

"Okay, good," Luke sighed a smile.

She fidgeted with her earlobe and squinted one eye at him. "It's actually the other way around."

His eyes shifted over.

"I want to bring her over on Zhellday night so we can catch up a little and then the two of us get up and go out shopping Benduday morning for the gowns."

"And you want me out of the way," he realized aloud.

"Only because she's really tense about trying to talk right now. She won't even try when she's in company. I think if I get her alone where she can feel comfortable about messing up, she'll try to communicate more."

"Okay." He nodded. "This Zhellday?"

"Yeah. Do you have a place to go?"

He turned back to his work and started clicking off datapads to deal with the rest tomorrow. "I'll figure something out."

"So. . . ." she peeped devious. "Can ask you another favor?"

Grinning, his eyes slid over.

"While you're there, ask that bishwag why he hasn't commed her yet."

He whined a fresh smile. "I'm not getting in the middle of that."

"Fine. Then just make sure he's not comming her for stupid reasons." She got up from the table to go put the fruit away.

His voice was sneaky, "Did you see your _apprentice_ today?"

Kess groaned comically and dragged her feet like a teenager into the kitchen.

Luke fought a chuckle as he pushed up from the chair. "Oh, this I gotta to hear."

"I don't wanna talk about it." Kess whined with pinching humor then respectfully met his eye. "Let me brew on this one a little bit and I'll brief you later."

Luke accepted that. He tucked his hands in his pockets and grinned inwardly. "I assume you saw Leia too? Since she's ordering you into ball gowns again?" When Kess glanced affirmative, Luke's tone changed to brotherly concern. "How is she?"

"Leia is a superhero in need of a cape." Her awe was palpable. "I don't know how in sandy hell she manages to keep it so together with all that's going on."

Blue eyes fell to nothing to think on it, and he grinned again. Leia may look like she was doing fine on the outside, but Luke vowed to go check in on her soon anyway.

"She wanted me to give you a message," Kess said, her tone softened. She watched Luke for his reaction.

New concern struck his features. "What?"

Kess dropped her shoulder on the inner curve of the archway and broke it to him gently. "She's going to name the baby Breha."

 _Not Padmé?_ That's what Kess expected him to say. And his expression flicked as though it might have been his first thought, but his eyes dilated on a distant spot of the sand-colored carpet and returned to her with a warm smile. "A baby girl." His smile widened. "Good for her."

Kess smiled to see him warm so brightly at that. He turned his feet and his eyes sparkled. "So that makes five," he boasted as he disappeared into the office. "I'd better get working on that infrastructure."

It took Kess a moment to figure out what he meant. She put the fruit away, biting into one as she worked, and counted in her head. _Breha, Leia, Tayla . . . oh yeah! Nik and Ben. Five. Already!_ The sooner they built that Academy, the easier it would be to train all these people, especially the young ones . . . and the adult ones with horrors to meditate away in a peaceful setting. _So . . . all of them_.

Kess now recognized why the old Jedi Order trained apprentices from infancy.

Jedi babies. . . .

Kess blinked.

And her eyes popped to globes.

"Oh shit."

In a rush, she stuffed the last of the fruit away and hissed under her breath to run across the house. "Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit."

She punched into the office where Luke was already sitting at the terminal and Wedge was already on the screen. Kess didn't acknowledge either and leaned over Luke's shoulder to punch in a few commands. Luke sat back and spread his hands to let her have the controls.

Wedge's image shrank down to the corner. His tiny image wrinkled with curiosity. "What's going on?"

Luke shook his head. He didn't know yet. But he paid attention.

A calendar popped up on the remaining screen.

"When was the Battle of the Line?" She asked in a panic, pressing her finger to a date.

Luke pointed at a slightly different date and sharpened his eyes at her. "Why?"

She walked two fingers forward by a few days. "How long was I out?"

He pointed at a date three days later and left his fingertip there. His brows knitted hard now. "What's the matter?"

Kess set one finger on that date, then stretched her thumb to walk forward to the present. One month. Two months. Three months . . . which would only be a few days from now. Kess dropped her hand from the calendar and laughed with groaning relief.

Luke's squinted at the calendar, but Kess smiled down at Wedge. "Sorry to interrupt. Carry on." She slapped Luke decisively on the shoulder and left the office.

Luke's palm still hovered in the air, stunned. His narrowed eyes followed her out the door.

Wedge hitched a new laugh. "What was that all about?"

Blue eyes flicked back to the calendar for a beat - then he quickly reached for the button with a darkened voice. "I'll comm you back."

 _Click_.

By the time Luke strolled out of the office, Kess was in the utility room punching commands at the in-house med droid and cussing under her breath. "Blast."

Slowly, he dropped his shoulder against the door jam with his new understanding. "They put you on birth control after the battle," he realized aloud.

"Yeah," she breathed. "I guess a three-month shot is standard procedure after a miscarriage. Dammit, this thing doesn't have the right kind." She began to gather her loose hair in her hands in preparation to go out again. "I'm going to have to go to a med lab."

She turned to go, but a big body was blocking her exit from the utility room. She stopped short.

Luke didn't move out of the way. His chin was down. He wasn't quite looking at her, but his eyes sparked with guilt.

"Oh no," she shook her head. "No. No. No."

He closed his mouth, and opened it again.

"You have to let me go do this," she demanded. "It's safer if the shots overlap by a couple of days."

Luke didn't move. His grin twitched as he inhaled for the right words. There was humor there, yet he was shy to meet her eyes.

"Not yet," she begged.

He snapped his mouth shut and swallowed carefully-

Kess shook her head some more and nearly squealed it. "Luke, we're not even married yet!"

Finally, his eyes flicked to her and his voice hiked too. "I know. Calm down. That's not what I'm saying."

"Then what are you saying?"

Brows popped up. His mouth smirked. "Are you going to let me talk?"

She huffed with humility. "Sorry. Okay talk."

His mouth rippled with uncertainty before he whispered his confession. "I got a shot, too."

"You did?"

He nodded.

"When?"

"About a week after the battle." He turned to rest his back on the door jam and face her. "I got it out of hope. I didn't tell you because I didn't want you think I was expecting anything when you graduated."

"Oh!" She piped and breathed freely now. She nodded at the air, truly relieved that she didn't have to handle this responsibility by herself. And she sighed new air again to accept the honor of that. "Okay. . . . Good."

Her eyes found him, but his eyes still looked a little guilty.

"You never mentioned it," she realized.

Now bouncing uncomfortably against that door jam, Luke shrugged a shoulder. "We never talked about it."

Kess crossed her arms at her chest and shrugged approval of that answer. She leaned her shoulder against the opposite door jam and took in this data. An easy nod, a fast sigh . . . but before she managed another shrug to accompany all this -

It didn't take the Force to sense it, to realize he was still blocking her way out of the utility room to go get her booster. Her eyes shifted sideways to see Luke's face and it was clear that his expression was not quite as stoic as he probably wanted it to be. His eyes dared to meet hers with unintended intensity.

This was no shrugging matter.

Her stomach flipped. Her breath was shaky, "I guess we're talking about it now, huh?"

He angled his head. His eyes worked hard to look innocent, but a hint of a grin betrayed him. His eyes stuck on her now, unable to gaze away, and his nervous words were tenderly voiceless. "I guess we are."

Blue eyes met brown for a long, heart-thumping beat.

She smiled sideways and cringed her own whisper. "Not yet."

"No, I agree. Not yet." He told his own feet. "But that's begs the question . . . ." And he really looked like a nervous farmboy when he found her eyes again. . . . "When?"

Her heart thudded with fear. Her eyes flicked to the air to think of Ben, of Leia's baby, of Tayla. . . . There were so many kids around already. Her eyes found his again, terrified.

Luke bounced his big shoulder against the doorjamb once more, rubbing his lips, afraid to ask. "Ever?"

Kess's lips twitched. "Well yeah, _someday_. Maybe? But. . . . I don't know." Then she found her voice once more. "Luke, we're not even married yet!"

"I know." He stared at his feet again for a beat, then rolled his shoulders back as if forcing himself to be an adult about it. "Go get your booster," he said as he shifted his feet and finally let her out of the room. "I just wanted to put the thought in your head."

He grinned at her like it had been a deviously planned poke in the metaphorical ribs, but Kess could sense the new knot in his stomach and the little white lie in his words.

Faking frustration, she gritted her teeth and shouted at his back. "But it's sure as hell ain't gonna to be _fifteen_ of them!"

Luke curled over with a giddy giggle and looked back over his shoulder with a bold whine. "Awe, _come on!"_

She tried to shove his shoulder as she passed him on the way to out, but he snatched her hand out of the air and yanked her in for a smooch on the mouth, then shoved her away once more. "Go on. I'll get mine next week and we'll have a double overlap."

Her eyes were sincere. " _Thank you_."

Luke strolled back to the office as she moved for the elevator, eyes hanging on each other for a longer moment than usual. This particular discussion was clearly _not_ over.

As soon as the elevator doors closed, Luke dropped into the terminal chair and slumped in defeat. He thought hard, pinched his mouth shut, and dialed up Wedge once more.

Wedge's face flickered onto the screen with a new kind of grin, but he chuckled more to see Luke set his elbows on the desk and rub his face with both palms in exasperated defeat. "Do I even want to know?"

Luke widened his eyes at his best surviving friend and stressed it. "I think I need to come over this weekend and get drunk."

Brown eyes laughed with surprise, but Wedge angled his chin and crooned deeply. "Bring it on."


	5. LL6 04 Ren Entada

Chamberlain Organa Solo walked the Trade Delegation to the door to bid them a respectful adieu before turning to Winter to meet her next appointment: the Purple Guard. They were no military, but it was their duty was to maintain the cease fire within the Senate Dome while the provisional government worked out the details of the new Constitution. The primary focus of the Purple Guard was to ensure the safety of all members of the new Senate-no matter their political affiliation-and had already taken posts throughout the Dome to ensure 'the people' who represented The People remained safe.

There had been growing pains with that, of course, for the Purple Guard compliment was a mishmash former Alliance Security and Imperial Red Guard forces, now tasked to work together to protect friends and enemies alike. Furthermore, the new sentry uniform of a dark purple helmet and dark purple robe prevented any passerby from recognizing a face to know if the guard was former Rebel Scum or Palpy Jackass. It was working so far -slowly and sluggishly- but it was working, because over and above everything else Alliance and Imperials fought over, the one _singular_ thing most of them agreed upon was that they all needed to stop shooting at each other.

Leia hadn't met with them in an official capacity yet, but since the Chamberlain was the icon of bi-partisan talks and the Purple Guard was the icon of bi-partisan safety, it made perfect sense they would send a team to report status and discuss plans for further organization. Leia was glad to have them-as long as the purple robed sentries stayed at their posts in the _outer_ hall.

Instead of a group, Winter introduced a single man. He was already standing tall and confident as if Reporting as Order was his old hat. Leia didn't recognize the black uniform, cut sharply to accentuate the thin straightness of a human male figure, but she did recognize the Imperial influence in its fashion. Yet the ominous color of the fabric was brightened tastefully with folds of smoky gray in the lapel and cuffs, and the sleeves and slacks were striped lengthwise with dark purple ribbon. She could see the reflection of her ivory gown in the high polish of his shoes.

"Is that the new uniform?" She asked with a friendly smile.

"It is a design still under consideration, Lord Chamberlain."

 _An Inner Rim accent,_ Leia noted, taking in the clues of this man. _He's probably an Imperial._

"May I introduce Ren Entada of the Purple Guard," Winter said.

Entada clicked his heels and bowed with a sharp flick of his chin. "At your service."

Leia shared a gaze of humor with Winter and gestured him in. She sensed this was a person with which she was going to have to work closely for years to come, and so it helped to get to know him. "Entada," she echoed thoughtfully as she moved to sit behind her desk again. "That's an Alderaani name, isn't it?"

"Indeed," Ren Entada stood front and center of her desk as if to remain at attention. He was tall and thin, with strong cheekbones and strong chin. He looked like he could have been royalty, but Leia didn't recognize him, and his Caucasian complexion did not have the appearance of someone who had been coddled all his life.

There was a hint of shame in his admission, "I was away . . . at the time of the tragedy."

Leia motioned him to sit and folded her hands in her lap. "It's nice to see someone from the old country."

Though Ren Entada seemed to take her offer to sit with a little surprise, he sat with poise, confidently lifting his chin to address her directly. "A rare treat, to be sure."

Leia spread her hands. "What can I do for you?"

"As you know, the Purple Guard has done its best to incorporate bi-partisan members within its ranks to ensure neutrality in its primary mission. We've recently been able to expand our monitors into the realm of tradecraft in order to exploit the information therein."

"Imperial and Alliance spies working together?" Leia smiled a joke of sarcasm, "Sounds like that was a fun project."

He smiled too and nodded. "Certainly no more difficult than yours, Lord Chamberlain."

She bowed a chin in appreciation of that respect.

"The upcoming Senate Ball is an historic event of Galactic proportions. As Purple Guard, it is our charge to ensure proper security of all its attendees up to and during the function itself. We've come to ask for your support to extend certain security measures."

"We're glad to have you. And I have the utmost respect for your daunting task." She spread a hand. "My office will provide whatever the Purple Guard requires."

"Good." He approved of that with a nod of his own, but his gray eyes were sharp. "But it is not your _office_ that is need of the extra protection."

Brown eyes shifted over.

"It's _you,_ " he said, and he seemed to know the weight of what he was saying.

Leia kept her cool. "Explain."

"As I mentioned, we've already begun incorporating the data between the various information agencies. There's been chatter that gives us reason to believe you-yourself-Lord Chamberlain, will be a target on or before the Senate Ball. We have investigators researching the matter to identify any specific culprit that we can neutralize, and we will keep you posted of that effort. In the meantime, however, Purple Command has enacted a security detail in respect to your person and privacy."

"A bodyguard?"

Ren Entada nodded severely, yet a spark of haughtiness lightened his eyes.

Leia chuckled and shook her head. "I don't need a bodyguard." She relaxed against the arm of her chair and shrugged a hand. "I already have one."

"With respect, Lord Chamberlain, Chewbacca cannot serve you in the fashion in which it's truly needed at this time."

Her brows popped up. "You don't think so? Perhaps I should arrange an introduction."

His mouth flickered a new smile as he straightened in the chair. Gray eyes leveled on her. "And therein lies my very point." While he showed the respect and formalities deserving of her position, this man was clearly as headstrong as she was. "If he is serving as your bodyguard, why isn't he _in this room_?"

"He has other things to do," Leia nearly chuckled.

Now, it was Ren Entada's black brows to lift into his forehead. "No self-respecting bodyguard has 'other things to do'."

Leia inhaled a sharp breath but could find no argument to that.

"Additionally, Chewbacca is Wookiee. And while that makes him perfectly suited to protect your person in the case of a bodily attack, he has not the speciatic capability to communicate in Basic, and that makes him limited to identify _non_ -bodily forms of assault or protect you in a crowd."

Leia sighed hard and stared at her desktop.

"As you so noted, Lord Chamberlain, the success of this very cease fire-and the new government we are trying to build upon it-is only as strong as her leaders appear to the rest of galaxy. It is, therefore, of _monumental_ importance we establish instant and critical safety precautions to protect the figurehead of this new government."

Leia closed her eyes and sighed, trying to smile. This poised and proper gentleman clearly had no idea the scuffs, scrapes, and _scoundrels_ she'd already survived. "I _don't_ need a bodyguard," she repeated, this time with strength in her eyes and a grin on her lips.

And Ren Entada gray eyes didn't flinch in her gaze. "Lord Chamberlain, please understand. It is not just your person in need of protection. You now carry another who deserves just as much, if not more, protection as Your Lordship."

Her palm went instinctively to her belly.

"And with the exponentially increased access and risk to which you now must subject yourself -Wookiee or no- Chewbacca cannot do it alone."

She inhaled a deep breath through her nose and nodded at her desktop. "Let me think about it."

"My apologies, your Lordship," he grinned awkwardly as he stood back to his feet and straightened his full height. "Perhaps I hadn't made myself quite clear."

Brown eyes shifted over and stabbed at him.

But he held strength in the gaze. "If you so recall, one of your first declarations as Lord Chamberlain was to grant the Purple Guard the highest reach and authority where it pertains to the safety and security of Senate members and staff." His brow arched with haughtiness, and he grinned a little. "There are many facets of this with which you will retain power and privacy, but you do not have the authority to dismiss the detail entirely."

Leia pinched her lips shut and glared at him under hard eyebrows.

Ren Entada grinned a little more, nodding again as if to bow. "I have posted an afternoon detail outside your office, I shall coordinate with Chewbacca, as I'm sure he will likely be part of this effort," his humor brightened, "and I'll see you at 18 hundred to escort you home."

"Well. See? That won't work for me," she shook her head. "I never get out of here before 20 hundred."

He had half-turned for the door, but stopped, arched a black eyebrow to take that in, and grinned back at her again. "Then I'll see you at 20 hundred."

Leia's mouth wrinkled.

"Have a lovely afternoon." And Ren Entada showed himself out.

Leia fumed for a full beat before launching out of her chair. Out in the office common, she found Ren Entada whispering instructions to a sentry in similar black/purple uniform already standing at parade rest outside her door. Ren completed his instruction just as she emerged, snapped his heels to tuck a sharp Imperial bow for her, and turned to leave the office complex entirely.

Winter eyed her with questions. Several other staffers paused mid-work so eyes could follow the man out and bounced back to the stiff individual now standing guard in a place she could watch their every move. Leia motioned Winter to wait a moment and strolled down the middle common as he left, then poked her head around to the data library.

"Yana?"

Yana was at a terminal, but her body was angled and green eyes stretched to get a glimpse of this Purple Guard authority who had caused such a stir. She turned her eyes to the Chamberlain and flicked her chin. _Yes, ma'am._

Leia lowered her voice to nearly a whisper. "I need an old-fashioned, Rebel scum, deep-as-you-can-go security check on Ren Entada and his entire detail."

To this, Yana rolled her shoulders back and nodded with stiff severity. _Consider it done._


	6. LL6 05 Suspended

Seven year old Ben Lendra sat on a stone bench outside the School Master's office, under the shade of an exterior hall, and swung his feet with impatience. His back leaned against the wall as if his spine had turned to gel and his fraying canvas boots scraped against the sandy stone ground. Blue eyes hung on the distant playground, angry, wishing he could get this unfairness over with and go play with the other kids.

Inside, Nik Lendra sat in the stone guest chair in front of the School Master's desk and stared at his own lap. His palms sweated. Nik absentmindedly kept rubbing them on top of his thighs throughout the School Master's long and difficult explanation.

"But nobody got hurt," Gina insisted from the seat beside Nik. "Right? You said so yourself he wasn't even on the same side of the room."

"Ms. Lendra, _no one_ was on the same side of the room." The School Master angled her head to address Nik sympathetically. "This isn't a punishment. I don't think Ben did it on purpose. He's a good kid. But the boy has been through a lot. All three of you have. I'm suspending him only because I think it would benefit you all to take these few weeks to bond."

Gina's face jerked up. "You're suspending me too?"

The School Master stressed it gently, "Ben needs quality time with his mentors. He needs to know you're both there for him. Take some time out and be a family for a little while. Work together to figure out what to do about all this."

Gina's jaw clenched.

 _What to do about all this._ Nik snorted a sick grin through his nose. _Why doesn't anyone just come out and say it?_

It was clear what the School Master thought they should do. Nik never said it aloud himself, but Gina already knew what Nik thought they should do. But Nik knew his wife felt like the galaxy was ganging up on her. He watched it out of the corner of his vision as his wife pinched her face into shut down mode. She stared angrily at the air to lament already about her house, her career, her friends, her parents . . . .

"Mr. Lendra, are you alright?"

Nik hadn't said a word so far. It was easier to stay out of the way so Gina could do all the talking. Now that he was addressed directly, he opted for the non-committal gesture of what everyone was thinking. "I'll comm my sister and see what she says."

"Good," the School Master calmed then, her stress abated, satisfied with the conclusion. "Feel free to give the Jedi my contact in case I can answer any questions."

When his parents came out to the exterior hall, Ben felt the weight of their stares. He remained drooped against the wall and glared up. "It wasn't me."

His father didn't agree or disagree. He simply shifted his boots and motioned Ben to come on home.

Ben sat up straight. "But it's recess."

"Come on, scrapper. We all got suspended over this."

Gina lifted her chin, "Nik, honey."

Her tone was soft, but he could hear the nails in her voice.

"Go call your sister. I'm going to take Ben to the playground."

She didn't wait for an answer, and Ben didn't need to be told twice. His pattering boots echoed in the stone hall of the school and Gina turned her back on her husband, arms knotted at her chest, and marched quickly away behind him.

* * *

"A _pencil_?" Kess's flickering image in the old viewer flickered more with trapped laughter.

Nik propped his elbow on the desktop and smashed his palm over half of his face. "It's not funny."

Kess tittered tightly and nodded. "It kinda is." The wall behind her in that new Jedi Office was still void of wall hangings, but she was in a clean tunic, with reasonable make up, braids tied neatly behind her head, and not a hint of grease on her. She looked healthy, especially with her cheeks pink with laughter.

The worried dad stressed the severity of the matter, "A pencil flying with such force that it impaled another kid's knapsack on the other side of the classroom."

She threw her head back with full laughter. Nik rubbed his eyes with his fingers and tried not to grin about it. He couldn't guess many times the two siblings sat across from each other at grandma's dining room table after school, staring hard at their pencils trying to move them with the Force. How many times did grandpa step over and pluck the pencils out of their sight so they would turn their intense concentrations back on their homework?

Nik grumbled about it, but tried not to laugh at it all himself. He fidgeted with the sweat on the side of his beer bottle. "What do you think grandpa would say about all this?"

To that, Kess sighed and settled. She gave her brother a sympathetic gaze and spoke with the wisdom of a real Jedi. "You know you don't need me to answer that."

Nik twitched his mouth.

"In fact, it's better if I don't."

"How do you figure?"

"Because, Nik, you have a family to hold together. And you guys need to make this decision as a family." Her gaze hardened. " _No one_ has the right to 'tell' you what to do about it."

Nik avoided her gaze for a long moment, then he swigged his bottle hard and slammed it down again. "I hate you." He shook his head, trying not to smile. "Just sayin'. "

She smiled anew. "Yeah? Well. . . Apparently, that's usually how Jedi Training starts. So I guess you guys are on the right track."

Nik rolled his eyes at that humor but stared at the pile of bills on the desk.

Kess continued conversationally. "Ben'll live. He's young. He'll bounce back. It's Gina you gotta worry about."

He acknowledged that with a nod at those bills.

"You know we're here for you," she assured. "Just say the word . . . . but Nik?"

Brown eyes glanced up.

"You guys have got to _want_ it," she stressed at him. "This shit ain't easy."

Nik absorbed the depth of her words, and realized he knew that much already from his own experiences. He folded his lips together and nodded some more. "I'll comm you in a couple days."

"Anytime, brother."

She hung up, and so did he. The house was warm with the afternoon sun shining on the upper dome and into the back window. The pale furniture of the pale living room was cluttered with signs of life. He swiveled aside in the desk chair to lower his elbows to his knees, fidgeting with the beer bottle under his fingers and staring at nothing. Then he looked up and looked around at the house, to see the paint patches of color ideas on the kitchen wall that Gina hadn't yet made a decision on color. . . . to see the adobe patch he just repaired by the front door. . . . the markings on the hall threshold where they kept silly measurements of Ben's height since the baby learned to stand. He closed his eyes and realized he'd pay off the place in only eleven months.

Lips pinched, his gaze fell back down to the beer bottle he just now realized was in his hand.

In a flash of rage, he sat up and threw the beer bottle away from him to crash against the far wall of the room. Blond beer splattered down the blond wall. Brown glass rattled onto the tile floor. Nik fell hard back in the desk chair and rubbed his face with both palms until his fingers clawed deeply into his own hair.


	7. LL6 06 Going Out

Kess and Luke were easily patient for most of the discussion between the Ketaris politician and his planet's own Farmers Union. The two sides of the debate didn't recognize it directly, but the real argument was that the farmers wanted to reap the benefits of the higher profits when their government sold their crops at inflated prices to certain off-world colonies. The urgency was that the Farmers Union had launched a full-on strike by preserving and storing all forms of grain produce in hidden locations. They would let none of it get distributed _at all_ until the matter was settled.

The Ketaris Secretary of Commerce expected the Jedi to just go 'find the food' on the premise that millions of their citizens were starving.

Luke and Kess did no such thing.

Hungry? Sure.

Dying of starvation? Not hardly.

The strike only started a week ago. The Ketaris upper class was panicking only because they'd never seen the back of their cupboards before. And the farmers saw the back of their cupboards all too often because the price of their labors—prices set and profits kept by the oligarchy—made it difficult for the farmers to make a living.

Luke and Kess sat both sides down across the little round table in the little naked conference room of their Jedi Office and let the two men take turns explaining their case. Neither Jedi said a word to interrupt either.

But Raol did.

In the middle of the Secretary's rant, the conference room door slid open to a tall, thin man with a datafolio in his arm and a polite grin on his mouth. "Pardon the interruption," he bowed to the guests as if they were royalty, then turned his attention to Luke and Kess. "It's eighteen hundred. Your evening guest is here."

Kess clapped her hands and shot out of her chair. With a giant smile from ear to ear, she dashed out of the room as if Raol had called recess.

The politician spat, "I'm not done talking!"

Luke closed his eyes for a moment of peace, but the grin on his mouth was obvious. He licked his lips and spoke calmly. "Your forgiveness, Mister Secretary. We simply have an appointment that Jedi Lendra has been eagerly awaiting. We'll continue this tomorrow?" He didn't wait for an answer and pushed out of his chair.

Out in the office lobby, Yana and Kess were hugging hellos and Luke grinned to see the two of them together. The Ketaris Secretary stomped out behind them all and spread his hands at this audacity. The leader of the Farmer's Union followed behind looked equally perplexed by the sudden end of talks.

Luke patted a palm at them both, but smiled as he did. "I'm sorry. I really am. But she and I have to be somewhere. We told you when we scheduled this that we'd only have four hours today."

"Can't you reschedule it?" The Secretary demanded. "My people are starving!"

Luke's feet stopped short. His chin tucked closer to his neck.

Kess did a double-take. She could feel it that a Less Than Political Response was trying to erupt out of Luke's throat. Kess was annoyed by this guy as much as Luke was, but the playful side of her snarki-ness was enflamed by the girly girl company. She smiled bright and cheery. "We'll resume first thing in the morning, Mister Secretary. For now, let us find solace that your _farmers_ are getting enough eat for a change."

The Ketaris Secretary of Commerce pinched his mouth at the insult. Behind him, the Leader of the Farmer's Union pinched a grin and fought an audible snicker. The Secretary stormed out the front door, and the other strolled easily behind him, half-waving and half-saluting as he left.

As soon as the four were alone, Luke swiveled on one heel with a caught grin and a dash of his head. "So much for us being neutral."

Kess whipped on an old Rebel jacket over her tunic. "Oh give me a break. We both know which side we were going to pick on this one."

" _I_ hadn't," Luke stressed.

She stopped short, her brow cocked curiously. "Really?"

Luke began but whipped an undecided hand in the air and sighed, dropping his hand again. His eyes landed on Yana and smiled anew. "Good to see you. How are you?"

Yana smiled wide and nodded pertly. _I'm fine, thanks._ She'd been mute long enough now that she'd grown skilled to exchange basic small talk with expression and simple gestures. She still wore a wrap over her head to hide the missing patch of hair, but her long brown locks peaked out from the colorful scarf over her shoulder.

Kess eyed Yana. "You have a speeder again, right?"

Yana nodded affirmative.

"So. You drive me home," then to Luke, "and you take ours."

Luke agreed and teased them. "Don't do anything Kayla would do."

Yana let out a clear laugh. She nodded, half winked, thumbed to Kess and then to herself. _She's safe with me._

Luke wagged a warning finger at the mute woman as he stepped to the door. "I'm trusting you."

As he pocketed his things to leave for the day, Yana elbowed Kess and thumbed over her shoulder at the man. Her brows wrinkled questions. _Where is he going?_

"He's going to stay the night at a friend's house so we can be true girly girls for a little while."

Yana's forehead wrinkled. Uncertain, she turned her green eyes from Kess to Luke. It didn't take Force skill to sense the sudden knot in her stomach.

Luke pressed a respectful grin, "Would you like me to tell him you said hello?"

Yana wrinkled her nose, shrugged, shook her head, and shrugged again. _Nah_.

But the Force pulsated with a dark wish and a dull heartache. Luke and Kess exchanged secret glances.

"Have a good time," Kess ordered him.

"You too," Luke smiled smoothly and strutted out.


	8. LL6 07 Trailer

At 2130 on Zhellday night, Leia finally wrapped up reading the last proposal she would make it through today, finished typing her notes on the subject, and switched off the datapad. One thing at a time, her mind whispered to herself. It takes many of millimeters of progress before you can reach a parsec of improvement.

Leia didn't expect her staff to stay as late as she did. She wanted them to have lives and often told them all to go home before she was ready to leave. The office common was empty when she emerged, except for the one person who always refused to follow that common order.

"Have a good weekend, Winter." Leia told her warmly. "Thank you for staying."

Winter stood from her desk. White eyes shifted to point at something behind the Lord Chamberlain's shoulder.

Leia turned and forced a smile at Ren Entada, now the one standing parade rest aside her office door. He snapped to attention and bowed brightly. "Good evening, Lord Chamberlain."

Leia would usually extend a hand of friendship and ask him to call her Leia, but not this time. Not with this one. She grinned angrily, angled her head for the exit, and marched out.

Her short legs made fast work of the hall, but his legs were longer. His stride easily kept up with her swift feet around the dome hall. Shrouded and helmeted Purple Guard sentries pretended not to notice her coming until they suddenly reach over and opened the antique hinge doors for her. Night was cold on Coruscant, the landing pad windy, even with the fine columns and adornments of the valet fly-through. Ren kept up at her flank, but Leia grinned inwardly that this wouldn't take long- Chewie was already parked and standing outside of the shiny speeder in wait for her.

His brown head cocked and a question gurgled from his growl.

Ren didn't seem fazed by it. He stepped fast around and lifted the speeder door like a valet would do. Leia gave him a glare and climbed in with all the prim of a princess, then erupted a single dark word out of her throat. "Chewie."

Leia wasn't sure which hand did the deed, but her door slammed shut, protecting her inside from whatever was about to happen next. Chewie barked. Ren tried to talk. She couldn't make out of any of it and didn't really try. In seconds, she heard a thump and peeked over her shoulder. The tidy black uniform crumpled as the man flew across the deck and fell in a heap.

Her brown eye angled back long enough for Ren to find hers again, pick himself up, and straighten his uniform. Those gray eyes were hard and intense, but he didn't try approach the speeder again. Chewie climbed in, slammed his own door shut, and looked over his shoulder at her.

Leia set her royal chin forward and rested her hands in her lap. "Ditch him."

Chewie closed his mouth and slammed the throttle. They took off like they had just robbed a bank.

As Chewie flew, Leia gazed out the window in silence _. What should I do about this man, Han?_ She wished Han had the skill to be able to whisper and answer on the Force. She patted her belly gently and closed her eyes to meditate.

Half way home, Chewie finally warbled something. A statement, and then a question.

Leia opened her eyes and sighed, bringing her brain back to business. "But he has a point. If there really is a danger, you can't do it alone."

Chewie cocked his head and nodded, grunting a humble affirmative. Another question.

"No. I have Yana doing that. She'll have it ready in a day or two. Meanwhile, just keep an eye on him. I'm sure he'll show up in the house in a few minutes, if he doesn't get there before we do."

Chewie warbled a sarcastic offer, that wasn't entirely sarcastic.

Leia chuckled too. "Just don't get any blood on the new carpet."

The Wookiee ruffed in a dark laughter.


	9. LL6 08 Girly Girls

Kess and Yana had long since changed into workout clothes and mismatched socks. One bottle of wine was empty and a second one was almost gone. Music played softly in the background, but neither were listening to it. They cuddled side by side on one couch, sharing a blanket, as Yana flipped through old photocaps and Kess watched the memories go by.

They practiced a bit of the sign language, and Yana agreed it was a workable solution - the med staff had already suggested it - but she insisted it was a temporary one. She was considering one of the implants, she admitted, but she wanted to secure another steady career first. Since the Chamberlain's office truly needed all hands on deck for the reformation, Yana was hesitant to leave her post on a childish want to be able to talk.

That's how she worded it when she typed it out in the data link, 'a childish whim.' Kess wanted to correct her that it wasn't, but sensed that Yana was only trying to compartmentalize it into something she could delay. Kess felt sympathy for her, and offered to visit regularly so they could practice sign language together. It wasn't a common language, but it wasn't entirely uncommon either. Yana treated the idea as 'better than nothing', and often reverted to texting on the data links instead.

But even datalinks had a severe drawback. In order to communicate, the recipient of her message had to be willing to stop talking and read. This too was a temporary solution, and really only worked with friends and respectful colleagues, for if Yana was in a situation where there as an argument, she could be too easily interrupted and dismissed by those not willing to read what she had to say.

Now, in the midnight hours, they stopped trying to talk at all. Yana rested her head on Kess's shoulder and thumbed through the old photocaps, occasionally picking up the data link for a question. "What was his name?" or "Where was this taken?" Kess asked a few questions herself, "When did that happen?" only to find out there was a lot more partying going on that she didn't know about because she was off training in the jungle with Luke somewhere.

When they reached the photos of the South Base Warehouse party, they smiled bitter sweetly at the memories in silence. Most of the pictures were of random people, acquaintances they hardly knew and now didn't know where they ended up. The Tigrian who ran the supply warehouse. The lady who had great guys jokes at the salon. The Togrutan roommates across the hall from them. Naturally, someone got a snapshot of the four of them sitting on that old bunk by the wall. In the photo, it was Kess drooping her drunk head to lean on Kayla's shoulder. Joanne was laughing at something. Yana was hiding her eyes with a shy giggle. And Wedge's knee was just barely visible where he had sat for a moment on the edge of the bunk to report to the girly girls: he did ask Luke if he could take Kess out on a date, but the Jedi Master said 'no'.

Yana paused on the photo, more so for the images of Kayla and Joanne smiling and laughing, having a grand old time at the party. Those two lived their lives to the fullest, Kayla flirting with every guy she could bat her eyelashes at, and Joanne the foodie who was willing to try anything that might excite her taste buds.

They both died for something they believed in. Yana and Kess lingered on the image with sad smiles. Somber, yes. Missing them like mad, of course. But it didn't feel entirely 'wrong.'.

After a minute, Kess pointed at the knee in the photo.

Yana lifted her head and eyed over, knowing this discussion would come up sooner or later. She reached for the datalink.

Kess lifted her own link to see what she typed.

He wanted you.

"Not really," Kess chortled with deep honesty, then added. "If he did, he would've fought Luke a lot more about that decline."

Yana shook her head and typed more. You don't know how much they fought over it. Her eyes were knowing.

Kess shifted her chin. She wanted to ask, but Yana's top secret security clearance meant she could _still_ not reveal any of her observations in the CIC bunker.

"I don't want to know." Kess finally said. "Because it doesn't matter."

It does to me.

Kess read that and scrunched her brows. "Is that why you're so hesitant?"

Yana shrugged and typed more.

He's a pilot.

"So?"

So I don't want to deal with another Mintalo again. She looked over and added. Do you blame me?

Kess knew of Mintalo, but she didn't know him. Still, she heard the stories. She shook her head. "No one can blame you for not wanting a repeat of that. But Wedge is no Mintalo. Not by a long shot."

Would you have?

"Would I have what?"

Dated him?

Kess had to think on that. "If I weren't Force Sensetive? Maybe. If the whole Jedi thing wasn't a factor? . . . Yeah. Probably. But, Yana, that's not the way things _are_."

Yana sat up from and reached for her wine glass.

"The war is over, girly girl." Kess said gently. "People change."

Yana looked over her shoulder at Kess. Her mouth flattened. _Bullshit_.

"I asked him about it. At the picnic that day. I asked him about you."

Yana shrugged and blinked for patience. _And?_

"He said he was ready to land. That's how he put it. He was ready to find a home port. And he was looking at you when he said it. Not me."

Green eyes shifted.

She typed.

I hardly know him.

Kess sat up and picked up her glass. "Well that is a problem we can repair." She lifted her wine glass in a toast. "If you let us."

Yana grinned appreciatively, but with overwhelming uncertainty, and acquiesced to that point with a clink of the wine glass.


	10. LL6 09 Entada's Gift

They flew over the glittering city without detecting any followers. They zoomed up to the fine apartment tower without any Purple Guard awaiting their arrival. They marched to the elevator in silence and stepped out onto her floor. As Leia predicted, Ren Entada was already there, standing outside her suite at parade rest as though he had teleported from one building to the other.

Chewie unlocked the suite, and Leia watched through her peripheral vision that Ren Entada didn't shift his eyes to her. He simply snapped at attention and waited for her to enter, then stepped around to follow the two inside.

Leia was already in the middle of the living space and turning to grin with arrogance when Chewie hooted obscenities and shoved his furry palm against the man's chest. Ren Entada flew backwards again and hadn't quit landed yet when Chewie slammed the door shut and locked it.

But Leia swallowed her patience and waited, because she knew how things worked a bit more than Chewie did. Ren Entada was a ranking member of the Purple Guard, and this was Coruscant. She lifted her chin and didn't bat an eye of surprise when Ren Entada unlocked the door from the outside and marched right on in.

Chewie spun and barked. Ren snapped his feet together and shifted humble eyes towards the Wookiee. "If you insist. Then I shall stand sentry with one arm. But I'd be more useful to you with two."

Chewie warbled a long riotous complained and Leia lifted her chin. "Chewie, may I have a moment alone with Mr. Entada?" Her eyes slid to the man with ice in her throat. "We need to discuss a few parameters."

Chewie ruffed and turned for the hall, muttering a reminder that he had superior hearing and she wouldn't even need to yell.

Leia turned in her grand suite and stepped to an easy chair in the sitting area by the big window. Ren Entada hesitantly stepped to follow, but set his feet back together and remained standing at a respectful distance. His expression and shoulders were easy with confidence, but he remained at near attention as if a waiter or office staff.

Leia crossed her legs and gestured toward the hall. "As you can see, my home is quite secure. Perhaps your team could focus instead on security at my office."

Ren nodded his chin to gather his words. "There are five of us, Lord Chamberlain. Chewbacca makes six. Two sentries will stand twelve hour shifts at your home. Two sentries will do the same at your offices. Chewbacca is most welcome to assist me in the 24 hour security of wherever your person may be, but it will be _my_ decision to ascertain if and when you are secure enough for me to take my leave."

"So you have truly assigned yourself as my shadow." She grinned angrily. "It's hard to believe there isn't an ulterior motive here."

Ren pressed his mouth with humility and blinked at the floor.

Her gaze shifted to the cityscape out the window, "And if I want to be alone?"

"I can keep a respectful distance, madam." His mouth flickered the humored truth. "I'm not here to invade your bedroom."

Daggers darted out of smiling eyes. " _Smart_."

"I recognize how uncomfortable this must be. Please understand - this is for the security of the, erm, Republic."

"Funny," she eyed him again and her smile died. "It sounded like you were about to say it was for the security of the Empire."

A black brow flicked with admission. "We are, all of us, on a new learning curve."

She arched a brow. "So you _are_ an Imperial."

"The war is over," he said, meeting her eye with strength. " _Now_ , I am no more an Imperial than you are a Rebel, _Lord Chamberlain_.'

Bi-partisanship.

Leia sighed hard through her nose and averted her eyes.

"Clearly, I need to prove my intentions to you." He rolled his shoulders back and reached into his breast pocket. Leia's eyes flicked to him. The Rebel instinct had her first thought that he might be going for a blaster, but her budding Jedi skill assured her this man wasn't a physical threat.

Yet.

"By way of anticipation for this contingency, I brought a gift." He stepped over only enough to hand her a datacard, eyeing her with raw honesty as it waited in the air for her to take.

Without breaking the gaze, she pulled the card from his fingers. Ren stepped back again, resuming his place between furniture on the other side of the sitting area.

"What's this?" She had no datapad to read it with, and so folded into her hands on her knee.

"A complete background check on myself and my staff."

Her brows knitted.

"I'm not here to spy on you." He said with a hidden grin. "After our meeting this morning, you would be stupid not to order background checks on all of us." He shook his head. "And you're not stupid."

She sat the card on the side table with poise. "Is this going to tell me anything I can't find out myself?"

"Smallish bits, perhaps," he admitted lightly. "I offer it more to spare you the drama of learning things you think I might be hiding."

Leia lifted her chin. "Why you?"

"The structure of the cease fire predicates on a clear vision of bi-partisanship throughout the galaxy. Purple Command felt it prudent that the figurehead of our new neutral government is guarded by both former banners."

When she glared at him, he angled his chin and worded it another way. "They like the optics of it."

She pushed to her feet, "Yes, but why you?"

His jaw rippled.

"Is it because you're Alderaani?'

"In part. I'm sure that was a factor in their choice. Beg your forgiveness, my lady, they had few trustworthy Imperial volunteers from which to choose."

She clasped her fingers together in front of her and repeated it again. "So why you?"

He thought on this before he spoke, and met her eye as he explained it. "Because the galaxy is torn in two, madam... And has been for a generation. Whatever our differences in politics, I think the one thing you and I agree on is that we have to stop shooting at each other. Regardless of your insurgent history or my Imperial loyalty, I do recognize what you're trying to do here: the daunting task of sewing the galaxy back together. And you have such an influence that I can almost believe it could be possible. So, for as long as you are working toward that goal without the intent of further bloodshed, I am honored to shield you from harm so that you _can_."

She sighed through her nose and turned toward the big window. She strolled a few steps away to look out at the Senate Dome and the Imperial Palace, and crossed her arms at her chest. She thought long and hard.

"And I am an Alderaani," he said. "Though I didn't agree with your father's politics, he was still my King. And therefore, you are still my Princess."

Leia wished she could feel that were true. She sighed with resolve and eyed the Imperial Palace out there in the cityscape. "Will you be requiring an office? Or a bedroom?"

Ren swallowed quietly. He lowered his eyes to the carpet. A grin flickered. "That would be . . . convenient."

She angled her chin to her shoulder only enough to nod him dismissed. She listened to his fine shoes pad on the carpet to the hall and disappear down the same corridor as Chewie.

Staring out at the cityscape with no humor on her mouth, she patted belly, and closed her eyes. _Calm down, Han. It's just politics._


	11. LL6 10 Drunk Wingmen

They were three beers deep already (six if you added them up) yet it was hardly 2300. Wedge had shed the shirt of his khakis upon entering his new apartment that and was now wearing nothing but a white t-shirt over his chest. His pants were still on, but the buckle hung undone over his belly. His scuffed boots crossed at the ankles on the drink table among the empty bottles and half-eaten Sheppard's pie.

Luke was in no better condition. He leaned hard against the far armrest of the new sepia couch with half his face in a palm. Only one eye watched the vid, trying to care about this sports game where the rules didn't make any sense and the players didn't seem to follow them anyway. Luke was still fully clothed though, and still wearing a blue jacket over his tan civvies because Wedge's place was always uncomfortably cold.

The evening began with bittersweet smiles and a manly hug, but the hug paused in place while the two silently lamented on visions of Han, Lando, Crix. . . .

Reeikan, Dodonna, Teak. . . .

Biggs. Hobbie. Dak. . . .

"But we won," Luke tried to point out.

Wedge attempted a smile and a nod. It didn't feel like they won.

That's when the first beers popped open and glass tinked in respectful memory of the fallen. There was an attempt at small talk, but it kept falling flat. 'How's Division One?' only brought a swell of survivor's guilt in Wedge's chest. 'How's the Academy coming along?' only make Luke pinched his mouth with overwhelmed frustration. The evening devolved into a feint repeat of that last night they were momentary roommates on Yavin 4, sitting side by side in silence to watch the newsnets after the celebration party, when Wedge choked on apologies for leaving Luke's wing in that trench, and Luke's stomach went tight to realize how many thousands of people he'd just killed with a single shot.

It was a safe bet that Wedge was only person in the galaxy who knew it - Luke felt like he had committed the same crime as the guy who fired the fatal shot on Alderaan.

Nowadays, Wedge understood how he felt.

Luke blinked slowly and focused to find one last sip in his bottle. He tipped back his head to suck it down and leaned over to slap the empty on the table with a thump.

Wedge eyed the bottle, then he eyed him.

Luke dropped back into the couch and curled his head into his arms on the armrest to go to sleep.

But Wedge sat up with energy, glugged down the last swig of his beer, and landed it on the table with a thud of his own, but then he reached over to the cooler beside the table and yanked out two more.

Luke heard the pop-hiss of new bottles and groaned. "No. No more. I'm done."

"Untrue, Red Five. You are just getting started." Wedge tossed the opener onto the table and snapped the cap across the room with his fingers. He reached over to slap the cold wet bottle against Luke's arm.

Luke didn't react; the jacket sleeve protected him, so Wedge leaned to reach further and pressed the ice cold brew against his face.

Luke sat up with a sudden yank.

"Drink it or I'm going to pour it on you."

The other man stretched a mouth of annoyance but took the bottle. He settled back against the couch with a sigh. "Why?"

"So you'll tell me what you're doing here," Wedge said simply. His eyes were on the vid, but he wasn't really watching it.

"I told you," Luke whined, "Yana's over for the night. I left so they could have girl time together."

"Yeah. Uh hunh. Sure," Wedge swigged. "Bullshit."

Luke dropped his droopy head against the back of the couch. "What d'you want me to say?"

"Well," Wedge turned off the vid and tossed the remote onto the drink table. "I suppose it's one of three things. One: you're here to try to hook Yana and me up. Two: you're here because something's gone wrong between you and Kess. Or Three: you're here because you realized I'm the last living friend you've got."

Luke blinked at the blank vid but didn't see it.

Wedge watched him. "Maybe all three."

Luke angled his head and groaned. "Nothing's wrong with me and Kess. I am not trying to hook you two up. I _want_ you to. But I'm not trying t-" He was drunk enough to forget his words, "I know you don't need a wingman for that."

Wedge shrugged an eyebrow and swigged again, licking his lips with consideration.

"But you _are_ the last living friend I've got, and maybe... maybe I'm just realizing how important that is." Luke eyed over with a stretched mouth of admission. "I find myself wishing I'd done this kind of thing with Han and Lando more often. So maybe I'm just grabbing the opportunity while you're still around too."

Wedge rolled his head on his neck and set one boot on the edge of the table with a grin. "Remember that night we all got drunk in the ready room on Echo Base? Lando wasn't there yet, but Han was."

Luke smiled big to remember it. "He was drinking like a bamboo stalk that night."

"Well, it was supposed to be the man's going away party." Wedge noted. "He had a right."

Luke shook his head against the back of the couch, his grin still shining to remember how Leia practically pulled a blaster and shot the man off for leaving the rebellion just because of some death mark (as if there wasn't a death mark on Han's head the whole time already.) " _That's_ not why he was drinking."

Wedge didn't need an explanation. He just grinned at the memories.

"You're right about one thing, though." Luke shifted sideways on the couch to face him and leaned his arm heavily on the back of it. At least this topic didn't have to do with the war. "I have been 'ordered' to ask you why the blast you haven't commed Yana yet."

Heavy grinning eyes slid over. "Do you _ever_ swear?"

Luke jerked his head back, but smiled bashfully. "When it's appropriate." He swigged his bottle, eyes lightening now. "Quit changing the subject."

The other man chuckled and challenged back. "Well, why hasn't she commed _me_ yet?"

"Maybe because she can't talk yet?"

And exhale escaped Wedge's chest. "It's permanent?"

"There's talk of a neuro-prosthetic. Kess is going to see if she can talk Yana into learning sign language. But, yeah, it's permanent."

The other man dropped his head against the back of the couch and stared at the ceiling.

"I'm sure she could use some morale support," Luke nudged.

"I don't want to intrude." Wedge murmured. "I don't want to assume. Or 'chase'. Or 'press'. Not this time... Not with her."

Luke angled his head, grinning inwardly that the great Wedge Antilles was finally sounding like he was ready to settle down. "For the record, I'm not trying to hook you guys up just because you're my best friend and she's hers."

Wedge squinted over. "You and I both knew Yana long before either of us met Kess."

"Yeah, but you didn't go after her."

"It was different then," Wedge groaned and sat up more on the couch. "Plus everybody knew she didn't like pilots."

"But that was Mintalo's fault."

"He wasn't the only one with that habit." Wedge swigged his bottle and admitted it. "I was guilty of it a time or two."

Luke chuckled deeply. "I still haven't heard the story about Kayla."

Wedge smirked anew and winced into his fingers with a groan. "Let's just say there was never a misunderstanding between me and Kayla." He grinned at the memory and lifted his brows. "And Hoth was fucking _cold_."

Luke laughed hard.

Beers tipped. Sighs released. Eyes floated away with memory.

"So what makes Yana so different?"

Wedge dropped his head back against the couch. Luke watched his eyes stare at the ceiling for a long time. Wedge slowly shook his head, his mouth parted as if the buzz was sinking into his brain, or the emotion soaking into his soul, or something. . . .

"The first time I saw her," Wedge muttered. "I remember the first time I saw her. We'd just got orders and we had to go through Echo's CIC bunker to get to the snow speeders. Rieekan was yelling at everyone to get to that first transport. And she was still at her post, standing over the terminal, typing so fast her fingers were blurry. 'Just a minute,' she kept saying, 'Just a minute. . . .' She couldn't pull herself away from uploading recon numbers to our HUDs. She wouldn't save herself on the hope that her data might save one of us. Rieekan had to shove on the shoulder to make her go. . . ." He rolled his head as if to look at Luke, but his eyes didn't quite make it. "That's when it really glued together for me, y'know? We get all the damn medals, us pilots but. . . . we'd be exploding debris if it weren't for the data admins. We'd be floating away in an infinite flat spin if it weren't for the grease monkeys..." His words trailed off.

Luke grinned sadly with similar thoughts, understanding now how much it killed Wedge to survive when he couldn't save the lives of the entire Rogue Group repair crew. Luke lifted his bottle to the air. "To the crew."

Brown eyes flicked over, but he nodded, tried to grin, and clicked his bottle against Luke's.

"We'd be dead if it weren't for support," Luke summarized.

A black eyebrow lifted in heartfelt agreement.

"So why aren't you getting some?" Luke challenged.

Brows knitted. Eyes shifted. "What do you mean?"

Luke laid the truth down like a hand of cards. "You are suffering survivor's guilt of infinite proportions, Red Three _._ " _If you're going to talk to me like that, I'm going to talk to you like that. "_ And you're avoiding the very support you need to get through it."

Wedge's face wrinkled more. "What are you talking about?"

Luke spread a hand. "You can't get through all this crap unless you talk to someone about it."

Wedge flopped his hands out and hiked to a yell, "Isn't that what we're doing?!"

Luke rolled his head on his neck and whined. "Not with _me_ , you idiot."

Wedge rolled his eyes. "I've never even shared a meal with the woman. I'm not going to show up on her doorstep to cry on her shoulder."

"It doesn't have to be like that."

"I don't need a wingman for this, Luke."

The Jedi chortled, "Apparently, you do."

"Can we please change the subject," Wedge said darkly.

Luke noted the sudden anger in Wedge's Force Print, and accepted that he'd pressed the matter too far. Wedge wasn't ready to face his survivor's guilt yet. Until he was, he wasn't going to be ready to face Yana either. "Sure." He forced his voice to lighten and he swigged again. "What do you want to talk about?"

With this invitation, Wedge shifted eagerly in the couch to face Luke the way Luke had been facing him. _If you're going to harass me about women, I'm going to harass you about women._ Brown eyes drilled. "Have you had sex with that woman yet?"

Blue eyes shined with manly victory despite the dark grin of warning. "Not that it's any of your business."

"Oh, gimme a break," but Wedge chuckled. Dirty eyes shifted to nothing in the air.

"Quit thinking about it," Luke snipped.

Brown eyes shifted back over. He was still thinking about it. "I swore to God I thought you were going to be celibate for life."

"So did I," Luke chuckled. "I considered it," he admitted brightly. "It seemed . . . simpler. I can see why the old Order made it a rule."

"You really considered it?"

"Yeah," Luke nodded, scratching the scalp behind his ear. "There's a trick that makes the craving go away."

"Well that must be handy when you can't get any." Then Wedge's eyes shined guilty at the air. "What did Kess do to change your mind?"

Luke chortled again, but shaking his head and anger growing in his throat. "I'm not sharing details with you, man."

"Oh, come on!" Wedge shouted, smiling. "After all those years I tried to get you laid? It's not like there's going to be another one for you!"

Blue eyes lost all their humor and locked onto the other man. This warning was louder.

Wedge's eyes suddenly lost their humor too when he remembered. The goodbye kiss was such a non-thing that Wedge completely forgot about it. He shook his head with severity. "I'm not asking so I can shoot at your target, Luke. I never did."

Brows lifted.

Wedge motioned his beer bottle in the air. "She was in Rogue Group for months! You think I would have waited that long if I hadn't figured it out that you were looking at her, too?"

Luke lowered tight eyes and swigged his bottle.

"If I wanted her that bad, I would have fought you on it."

"You did fight me on it." Eyes rolled back over to stare accusations.

More guilt welled up in Wedge's chest and compressed the guilt that was already there. He launched to his feet and paced away. "But I wouldn't have had to if you'd've just nailed her when you should've." He paced back and hissed at the other man. "You were so fucking Jedi about it you even had me fooled! And the shit you put her through was _rough_. And you wouldn't even see it. When it was right in front of you! You wouldn't even see it!"

"I did see it," Luke said in a harsh whisper. "I did what I had to do." He angled his head to watch the other man huff, but Wedge wasn't angry. Luke knew Wedge was reacting this way simply because anger was easier to process than guilt. "You wouldn't be this pissed off if you didn't feel so guilty, and you would feel guilty about it if you didn't still want her."

"That's not wh-." Wedge said roughly, but stopped himself and let out a hard breath. He pinched eyes of darker anger and launched it at Luke. "Y'know, I can't believe you, sometimes. You get so damn high and mighty when others have to deal with being human and you can't even see that you go through the same crap yourself!"

Luke blinked slowly and rippled his mouth closed. The alcohol was soaking into his brain now. And Luke momentarily considered it might be best to toss his lightsaber into a corner for the rest of the night.

Yet maybe this is what these old war buddies needed so they could get past this.

"Why'd you do it?" Luke finally asked him. And he looked over at him, bracing himself for the answer. "Why'd you kiss her?"

"It was a _good bye_!" Wedge growled out. His violent voice echoed against the walls of the apartment. "We are all about to die! I didn't think I'd ever see her again. _Or_ Yana, _or_ Kayla, _or_ Ashten. . . . I don't know how I knew but I knew. Pad 14 was a _family_. Rogue Group was a _family_. We busted our asses, back to back to _back_ to get this war where it needed to end. She was just the last one I saw when I left that Pad for the last time. And yeah, you wanna know? Fine! For that moment I wished she was mine. Because she deserved better than you, you _sonofabitch_. She deserved a lot better than what you put her through."

Luke's eyes dropped closed.

"That night, before we launched for the biggest fucking battle of that war, remember Luke, she went home to you. And I went home to _nobody_."

The anger was beginning to calm, and the confession assuaged the guilt by a tiny bit, but the drunk was still there. Luke sighed parentally, unlatched his lightsaber, and tossed it onto a far corner of the room.

Still standing out of reach of it all, Wedge spread his palm and spat. "What's this about?"

Luke melted his back against the couch and rested his forearms across his face. "Just a precaution."

Wedge hitched a harsh accusation. "You are so arrogant sometimes."

Now, Luke pinched his mouth and launched off the couch. "No!" He stomped over the drink table, fists clenched and hissed back in the other face. "No, _I am not!_ If I were arrogant about this I wouldn't have needed to throw it over there in the first place. Do have any idea how much I want to bust you in the jaw right now?!"

"Do it."

Luke hardly heard him. "You think I didn't want to rip out your throat every time you looked at her on the Pad? That I couldn't sense everything that was going on in your mind? You think I can't sense that stuff?"

Wedge lifted his chin and loosened his jaw. "So do it."

Luke closed his eyes and shook his head. "I don't want to hit you."

Wedge turned his eyes and twisted his mouth.

"I need you." Luke admitted it in a defeated mutter. "I need my wingman for this."

Brown eyes flicked back, seeing a new turmoil in the old friend. Now Wedge too realized there was more going on than he knew about. Something else was wrong. But this smoke had to clear before they could get to it.

He hitched with humor. "Would you just hit me and get it out of your damn system."

Luke half-turned away, shaking his head. He inhaled a long slow breath of air and closed his eyes like he was about to meditate.

In Wedge's opinion, this was not the answer. What Luke needed right now was to not be a damn Jedi for a minute. Wedge smiled more, sickly, and shouted into the side of his face. _"I kissed your woman!"_ He taunted. "I wanted to rip those greasy coveralls right off her body and nail her to the office wall! Even _after_ I figured it out that you were in love with her. I wanted to make her scream so loud just to wake your ass up from a sound sleep-

 _CRACK!_

Wedge let his face whip aside. He grinned as he adjusted his jaw. Luke whipped his hand in the air and gritted his teeth for letting Wedge drive him to it in the first place.

Wedge cocked his chin sideways. "You feel better?"

Luke's eyes were still closed. "A little."

Wedge rubbed his jaw with his palm, watching him, and flicked his eyebrows. "Are you going to brace for it?"

Slowly, Luke shook his head, and didn't open his eyes. "No."

"Good-" _CRACK!_

Luke let himself lose his balance a little and set his hands on his knees, grimacing at the floor. The pain in his jaw felt cleansing somehow. But that was a bad sign.

Wedge rocked a step back and rubbed his knuckles with his other palm. "Now that we got that out of the way. . . ."

Luke peeked an evil eye open and rolled his shoulders back to his full height. He shifted his gaze away and hissed a sigh. He was too intoxicated to face this like a Jedi. No wonder he didn't like getting drunk.

But Wedge just stepped up and slapped him on the shoulder, gritting an angry grin of his own. "It's time to flip this coin." Wedge's husky voice hissed into the side of his face. "Now it's your turn."

Eyes still closed, Luke shook his head. "To do what?"

Wedge's voice went even rougher than before. "Your turn to look me in the eye and try to tell me _you_ never wanted to nail _Yana_ to the wall."

Blue eyes flicked over.

Wedge just chuckled. "Now there's the dark side if I ever saw it." He let his palm slide off Luke's shoulder. "You think I didn't notice how much she looks like a redhead in the sunlight?"

Luke visibly gritted his teeth and turned his face away.

Wedge picked up his beer bottle, swigged it, and plopped his ass back down on the couch. "You've got no right to be high and mighty about any of this."

Luke shook his head and whined at him. "But I was never in love with her."

Wedge spread a palm and nearly sang it, "And now you get it."

Luke scratched his neck and grimaced.

"Kess would have been just another Kayla to me," Wedge admitted. "And I think she knows that. As for her, I could never out-fly you. She was in love with you the minute she reported as ordered. The only reason she _ever_ looked in my direction was because she didn't know you were in love with her too."

Luke stood behind the drink table and set his hands on his hips. He stared at the floor for a beat, and he adjusted his jaw one more time.

Wedge disciplined him with a shout, "So get off this jealousy crap, propose to her like you were going to, and be done with it already!"

To this, Luke shifted. "I already did."

Wedge blinked back. "When?"

He dropped his hands from his hips and moved tiredly back to the couch. "Last week."

"Did she say yes?"

"Of course she did."

Wedge spread both palms and whined so loud he almost sounded like Han. "Then why the hell are we fighting over this?!"

Luke arched a brow, "Because I'm starting to wonder if I made a mistake."

Wedge rattled his head. "Why?"

Luke swallowed hard.

"Not because of me!"

"No, not because of you."

"Then why?"

Luke murmured it. "She doesn't want kids."

Wedge slammed his eyes shut and rattled his head again. He rolled over his lap and almost sat up. "Wait. Wait..." He waggled his hands in the air. "You _just_ proposed to her last week."

"Yeah."

"And you're already talking about _kids_?"

Blue eyes stretched over. "Well, yeah. Isn't that the point of getting married?'

Wedge shoved his wide eyes closer to the man and shook his head. "No, you idiot, it's _not_!"

Blond brows wrinkled.

"By the Force, don't tell me all you wanted her for is to breed babies for you!"

Luke grimaced at the ludicrousness of that. "No! But-

"But nothing! Luke, you can't fly women like your hitting hyperspace."

"What do you mean?"

"You can't hold her at a dead stop for a year then expect her to jump for the end game just because _you're_ suddenly ready for it."

"We weren't at a dead stop like everyone thinks."

Wedge rolled his chin in the air. "Did you _show_ her that while she was training?"

"Well, no, I couldn't."

"Then for all intents and purposes, man, you were at a dead stop."

Luke's eyes shifted. He stared at the air.

"When was the first time you slept with her?"

Luke pressed his mouth and eyed a new warning.

But Wedge shook his head and his intent was clear. "I'm not asking for details, I'm just asking when."

"Victory day. When she graduated. Why does that matter?"

"So not even three months ago."

"So?"

Wedge didn't know how to explain it. He just shook his head and grunted. "You're lucky she said yes."

That's when Luke realized it. To him, it felt like he and Kess had been a couple for more than two years. But if you take away all the Force senses, all the tricks and complications of Jediship, if he looked back over the calendar and just saw their relationship from the perspective of mundane rebel shipmates, they'd only been a couple for three months.

Luke dropped his head back against the couch and stared at this new clarity. "You're right," he whispered in the sudden quiet.

Wedge glanced over, and rolled his eyes away again. He had to remind himself that Luke was still suffering 'farm boy mode' when it came to women, so he let the man swim in the epiphany for a minute.

Luke just stared at the air and shook his sluggish head. "I am so in love with that woman."

Wedge grinned at his lap.

"All that time. . . all that time you guys were trying to get me laid, I thought I was above it. I didn't need the sex, I had tricks. It seemed a waste of time. An unnecessary complication." His jaw rippled as he swallowed. "It wasn't until I was training Kess that I realized there was more to it." He licked his lips closed and breathed. "Sure the sex is great but . . . but even if we did make Jedi vows of chastity, even if she said no to the locket. . . . she'd still be my partner for life."

Wedge's mouth dug a deeper grin to hear that. All was well. And he was a little honored that Luke finally felt comfortable enough to speak these kinds of truths to him.

So, the farm boy Jedi is as male as the next guy. Wedge understood him now better than he ever did before.

"Can I ask you something?" Wedge murmured after a long silence.

Luke's eyes were already closed and quickly drifting off to a drunken sleep.

"And I admit this time it's just out of dirty curiosity."

"Hm."

"Now that you have slept with her-couple times, I'm guessing-and I admit to a moment of imagination of what that was probably like..."

Luke rolled his head on the back of the couch and peeped an eye open, but despite the topic, Wedge had a curl of humor in his voice, and Luke's buzzed brain naturally remembered images of the very act on which Wedge was speaking.

Wedge dropped his head back on the couch and rolled his gaze over with a dirty smirk. "Could you bring yourself to consider vows of chastity _now_?"

Luke's eyes widened a little. He slowly began to shake his head, eyes widening more, grin growing from ear to ear, until he chuckled with a pink flushing his face.

Wedge balled his fist and jerked an elbow of success. "Well done, Lendra."

"I'm surprised we didn't wake _you_ up out of a sound sleep," Luke flushed even as he bragged.

Wedge chortled dark and dirty, and climbed off the couch. He strutted away with a murmur, "Good shot, Red Five."

Luke could only stare at the air, envisioning flashes of skin and the sweet intoxication of sex, and closed his eyes again so his mind could swim in it.

A pillow sailed through the air and landed in his face.

Luke blinked back alive. A wadded army blanket landed on him next. Luke wrapped his arms around both and tried to tell his brain to stay awake long enough to take off his boots, but he melted sideways down on the couch.

Wedge shuffled into the bedroom with a grinning grumble, "No whacking off on my new couch."

"You neither." Luke called with his head and shoulder already cuddled sideways into that new sepia fabric.

Wedge paused at the door and smirked back. "Why?" _Not that he was going to but-_

"Because I can't block it when I'm drunk." Luke smacked sleepy. "And I don't want to have to listen to you imagining sex with my fiancé."

Wedge's mouth smiled, and his tone was deep. "Trust me, Luke. It wouldn't be Kess I'd be imagining," and he closed the bedroom door.


	12. LL6 11 Procrastination

Unable to battle all the problems plaguing his mind, Nik left for the pub before Gina and Ben got home. He told himself he needed time to think; time to have some quite away from the house and away from them. He had only a few beers before the evening regulars showed up, and they greeting him with a manly slap on the shoulder with tales of hilarity and complaints about bishwags as the crew sucked down evening ales. Soon, Nik was laughing again, bright eyes distracted with the minutia of it all, and enjoyed a few more beers to have an excuse to stay and enjoy the distraction a little bit longer.

His eyeballs were spinning by the time he stumbled home that night. He did his best to stay quiet, but stumbled a little bit in the entryway and accidentally slammed the door. He wiped his palm over his face and struggled to pull off his shirt as he moved through the living room. He disappeared into the toilet and finished stripping while he was safely sitting down. Then he sat there for several minutes longer even after he was done. Finally, when he realized he was about to doze off with his underwear around his ankles, he cleaned up, groped through the dark hall, and snuck into the bedroom.

Gina rolled her back to him.

Nik lay down with his back to her and promptly passed out.

Sunshine on his face awoke him. He cleared his throat and squinted through the headache to look around. Sunlight? He looked at the chrono. The work bell rang over an hour ago.

Nik curled in lips of angry punishment and dropped his head back on the bed for a moment of mental punishment. He forced his body out of the bed.

He was already late enough as it was, ten minutes in a hypo shower wasn't going to make much of a difference, but being clean only helped him feel a fraction better. He came out of the back of the house in his work grubs and grabbed his jacket.

Gina and Ben were sitting at the cluttered dining table with a section cleared away so Ben could work on a homework assignment. Gina cradled a cup of java in her hands and murmured gentle instructions on how to do the math.

Ben fidgeted with the pad to work out the numbers and didn't look up at either of them when he asked. "How come I have to do math work if I got suspended?"

With his jacket half way onto his shoulders, Nik paused.

Gina gave him a dark glance and murmured back at her coffee cup. "Because you still have to learn the math work."

Ben's little mouth twitched and he worked more numbers.

Nik finished putting on his jacket and blinked his eyes hard of the hangover.

"How come Dad has to go to work? I thought we all got suspended?"

"Because I still have to pay the bills, scrapper," Nik said and stepped around to grab his key cards and wallet. He reached over and scrambled the Kenobi-blond hair on Ben's head. He reached down to give the boy a kiss on his fat cheek, but Ben sneered and wiped him away.

"You stink again."

Nik's chest stiffened at the insult.

Gina stared at nothing on the table. She wouldn't look at him.

Nik tried to shove it off. "Well, I'll take another shower when I get home from work." He took a step toward the door and paused. "You guys have a nice day off, huh?"

Gina began to speak.

"Bye Dad," Ben called too easily. He didn't look over.

Gina clenched her jaw and resumed staring at the tabletop.

"Gina," Nik finally said. "Look at me."

She shifted . . . then shifted some more so she could lift her eyes to him. There was no humor there.

"Let's talk tonight, huh?" He offered, "We'll figure it out when I get home."

She pressed a tight smile and nodded at the table. "Have a good day at work."

Nik realized he could solve nothing right now, and so turned his feet to the door and pinched the bridge of his nose to fight the headache for the whole drive to the refinery.

The hardhat felt good on his head. Shutting the gate of the freight elevator felt comfortable. The smell of solvent felt like home. The grit of sand under his boots. Salt in the air tighten on his hot skin. Regit was in a good mood and began to sing filthy songs as they worked. His out-of-tune voice echoed against the structures and through the grated catwalks. The cheap java in the office cleared Nik's head enough to do his job, and soon he was singing too, like railroad songs to keep the beat of rolling barrels and yanking heavy levers that started machinery with an ear pounding beat.

Nik wasn't sure why he wasn't expecting it, but Regit stuffed his hard hat into his locker and offered up a bet. "Twenty credits says my Red Lighting wins it tonight."

Centaxday. The pod races. Nik began to shake his head. "I can't tonight. I got a family meeting waiting for me at home."

"Awe man, come on." Regit whined and cocked his head. "You can afford a few minutes for one race. Besides, Gina knows its Centaxday. She never had a problem with it before."

Nik stuffed his safety jacket away and his mind spoke with two voices. One said no, he had to go home and face this, even if he still didn't know what he was going to say. The other said yes, because Regit is the closest friend you've got. It would help Nik formulate a plan if he had someone to bounce all this off of. But no, the first said, if you go to the pub you're not going to just have one. But yes, the other said, you don't have a problem. You're just going through a rough patch right now. And for what you went through on Coruscant, you have every right to a few moments of weakness. If Gina can't understand that, that's her problem. And Ben's young enough that he'll bounce back from all this with room to spare. Besides, it's the best way you know how to meditate. . . .

By the time the voices stopped talking, Nik was sitting at the bar and drinking a beer.

Red Lightening lost the first round, so Regit bought the next round of drinks as the method of paying up on his bet. Nik squinted one eye shut. He forced himself to take advantage of this detour and tried to bring up the subject with Regit. Should they stay on Tatooine and try to handle all this budding Jedi skill themselves? Or should they abandoned everything they'd worked for to discipline themselves into a lifestyle none of them were sure they wanted in the first place?

But his few vague topic starters fell flat. Regit pretended to listen, but the man's eyes remained on the vid behind the bar. And he continually peeped with comments and statistics on the various race teams. It soon became clear that Nik's 'best freind' couldn't give a half a shit about the dramas of Nik's fracturing family.

Regit babbled on, "No human's ever done it. Did you know that? No, I take that back. There was one kid. Buncha years ago, one kid won the Boonta Eve race. Can you believe it? A human kid!" Regit shook his head and turned his eyes back to the vid. "You'd think he'd go professional when he grew up. He'd a made a ton of money. But the scrapper took his winnings and took off. Never raced again. Can you believe it?"

Now, Nik's mouth had closed down all attempts to try to talk to Regit about anything serious. Brown eyes glued to the pod races on the vid and absorbed the dead end road of this simple life.

Suddenly, Nik felt complete understanding for that pod racing human kid. Whoever it was, he was smart for taking his winnings and hopping the first freight off this rock.

"If I won the big pot, y'know what I'd do? I'd buy an island on Nekisa and populate it with a bunch o' Twi'lek sex slaves. That's what I'd do. Go swimming in the ocean every day. Make them just pour water on me, every day, just because I can." Regit smiled over and slugged his beer. "What would you do?"

Nik's eyes dropped to him.

"If you won a big pot," he repeated. "What would you do with it?" Regit smiled a little more to tease him. "Other than pay off your house."

Nik's eyes fell on nothing but his mind saw a vision. He had a glowing blue blade of light in his hands, and a glowing green blade of light crossing it, and behind all that, Luke Skywalker's face grinning with approval of his skill.

"I'd go to school," Nik murmured distantly.

" _Really_?" Regit twisted his brows and laughed. "What kinda school? You already got your Chem Cert. What else could you get that would do anything to your resume?"

Brown eyes finally shifted over and took in the sight of Regit for what this man really was to him: a bad influence.

"I gotta go." Nik pushed away his half empty glass.

"Wait a minute. You can't go yet! They're about to race the finals!"

Nik climbed out of the chair and pulled on his jacket. "No, Regit, I gotta go." He slapped the other man on the shoulder and shrugged off Regit's continuing arguments. "See you tomorrow."

Nik stuffed his fists in his pockets and walked home with much more grace than yesterday, but it was dark already, and Gina was sure to be waiting in the living room with all the warmth of an iceberg. Nik beat himself up with disciplinary thoughts and sighed a vow to quit doing this. His wife and son need him home, not at the pub. He cleared his throat, determined to never go to the pub with Regit again.

He didn't slam the door open this time. The house was dark; only a table lamp and the entrance light was on. They went to bed already. That was fine. They were probably both exhausted from all this drama. He considered how much time off he had on the books so he could stay home tomorrow and have the family meeting with them in the morning. And then remembered that he used up all his time off by being kidnapped on Coruscant. Nik couldn't bring himself to tell anyone that, no, pretending to be the Emperor for a month was _not_ a vacation. Nik tossed his jacket across the back of the clean couch and dropped his datacard on the naked dining table. His eyes shifted to see the kitchen.

It was spotless.

 _Now I know I'm in trouble._ Nik thought. If Gina went on a frantic cleaning spree, that meant she had a well of anger she was trying to burn through. _This isn't good_. Nik decided to face his punishment like a man, but tomorrow. Tonight he'd give her the respect of letting her sleep. A school teacher with a Jedi son and drunk husband at least deserved a good night's sleep.

Quietly, he kicked off his work boots and stripped in the darkness. He wasn't drunk, but he was buzzed enough that he knew he'd fall asleep quickly. His side of the bed was still made; she hadn't even stirred enough to crumple the blankets. So he carefully and quietly slid under the covers without disrupting her peace.

With his back to her, he cuddled his head on the pillow and stared at the darkness.

Damn, she was quiet.

His chin turned.

Too quiet.

In a quick move, he rolled onto his back and put his hand out. His palm found the other half of the bed still as neatly made as his had been.

Nik sat up in a rush and turned on the light. Gina wasn't there.

He whipped the covers off of his legs and slammed the closet open. Half the hangers were missing clothes, and the suitcase on the shelf was now an empty hole in the otherwise cluttered storage. Feet rushed out the hall and through the tidy living room to race through the open door of Ben's room. Nik slammed on the light there too.

Bed neatly made. Toys put away. Remote control fighters lined up on the shelf, but three of the favorites were missing from their posts as though they flew off to war.

His chest heaved air through his open mouth. His brows wrinkled as he stepped to the boy's closet and slammed that door open too.

The clothes were gone.

Nik stumbled backwards. His hands raised slowly to his forehead and his neck crooned to the air. His face crumbled to a storm of rage and regret. His back fell against the stone wall and his body crumbled to slide down and sit on the floor. Rubbing his face with a palm, his features contorted with panic and heartbreak, Nik peaked through his fingers and stared at his son's neatly made, empty bed.

The little voice spoke again. _Now, you've really earned a drink._


	13. LL6 12 Broken Family

Nik called out sick, and Lithyn in the front office warned him gently that had no sick pay left to take. He explained vaguely that he was having problems with his family, that he intended to try to take them to a counselor today, that all the fodder from their month with the Alliance and on Coruscant was coming to a head, Lithyn said she'd see what she could do to keep them for writing a disciplinary report for his unauthorized absence. Nik wanted a drink after that, and it was still morning.

This was the problem, he realized. He sat at that empty kitchen table and looked out the living room view to the red ridge beyond. Gina fell in love with the place because of that view, even thought it wasn't the best of houses. Nik remembered sitting on that back patio with her, squatting on boxes not yet unpacked, and popped open a bottle of chocolate wine to celebrate closing escrow. They sipped the sweet liquor out of paper cups. Nik scooted the box to the wall and rested his back, spreading his knees wide so Gina could sit on the box between his legs. They cuddled and giggled and talked about paint colors and new furniture, and what they were going to use the second bedroom for. Gina wanted to make it a study even though she'd already finished the History Cert so she could qualify for school teacher. Nik wanted to put a billiard table in there. They never settled that loving debate before the density of the spare bedroom was decided for them.

Nik started into his java as much as he stared at that red ridge and those memories.

But they couldn't really afford this place. Gina had to go back to work almost as soon as Ben was born. She hated to leave the baby with public daycare, but she loved her job. Nik wasn't sure if she liked it because the job let her talk about Galactic History all day, or because she loved the young kids she taught, but it didn't matter. The woman was active in the school board, worked late to meet with parents of troubled students, and never missed an evening of grading homework. It was clear to Nik that one of Gina's biggest hesitations to leaving Tatooine was that she would have to abandon all that work and all those students with which she invested so much time and care.

Nik wanted a drink for this, and one voice told him he would handle it better if he had one. But the other voice was louder and made a lot more sense. If he went to Ellen's with a hint of liquor on his breath, if he stumbled or slurred his words at all, Gina would solidify her decision and would not bring her and Ben home.

So Nik suffered through this incredibly tense morning and waited for the suns to lift fully over the ridge before he put away his java and grabbed the speeder key.

His mother-in-law wasn't a difficult woman per say, but Nik had to take her in doses. She had an unusual intensity about her. It was discomforting to be around her. Nik always minded his Ps and Qs at her house, ensuring he was he sounded bright and easy just so the woman wouldn't descend into unnecessary stress. It would be so much easier if he could face Gina without Ellen around, but Nik was also prepared to eat as much crow as necessary so Gina would turn this around. He wanted a drink to handle Ellen, but he focused his mind to yell louder than the voices. This is my punishment! I fucked up! I deserve an afternoon of brow beating from my mother-in-law.

As it was, Ellen didn't really speak. She radiated stress, but also an understanding of the situation. She seemed to know that Nik was there to apologize without him needing to explain it. He didn't know if she was close enough to detect he hadn't been drinking, but the matter proved itself enough that she stepped aside and let him in.

"Dad!" Ben ran up and showed Nik a new fighter toy grandma had bought. Nik lowered to a knee and gave the boy his complete attention. "Hey scrapper, that thing is really cool. You having fun at grandma's?" Ben talked a little, seeming oblivious to what was happening, but Nik closed his eyes and kissed the lad's blond head.

And he heard it. Or sensed it. Or something.

Ben was uncomfortable. He knew something was wrong. He knew mom was mad. He knew dad was untrustworthy. Ben feared his family was breaking apart, and he felt unsafe to face the galaxy without it. All he wanted was for everything to glue back together; for his mom and dad to giggle at each other again, to be there for him, so that Ben could resume his comfortable existence in the cradle of family and only have to worry about fighter toys and homework.

"Ben, honey," Ellen called, "Will you help me with the vaporator filter? My back is bugging me today I need a strong man to do it."

Ben tried to ignore the request and kept flying the fighter into his father's face.

Nik patted the boy on the back. "Go help your grandma. I'll be here when you get back."

"Are you sure?"

"Go on."

Ben and Ellen moved out the backdoor to her tiny, sandy patio. Nik stepped hesitantly into the living room where Gina was sitting in a chair and cradling a cup of herbal tea on her knees. Her pale completion and dark hair made her look like a queen in the mid-morning light. Snow White, he once called her. Dark eyes, red lips. . . . No boobs to speak of but Nik didn't care about that. She stared at her tea for a long time, so Nik stepped further over and sat on the corner of the drink table in front of her.

He rubbed his palms together. "How-" His voice cracked. He cleared his throat. "How long did you plan to stay?"

She blinked slowly and turned her eyes away. "I haven't decided yet." Her voice was beaten.

Nik closed his mouth and nodded to himself. At least she hadn't filed for divorce yet, but he was certain that was on the table. That thought filled him with the dread of skirting way too close to a cliff. Divorce would be the end of his world.

Nik swallowed hard and tried to figure out what to say. "I've been screwing up. . . . And I know it. . . and I'm sorry. . . . " His words caught in his throat. "And I wish I knew what the answers were."

Her eyes found him, but hard, and her whisper was shaky. "You need to stop drinking."

His mouth quivered, but he forced himself to keep her gaze. "I know."

Gina took that for what it was worth and lowered her gaze to her tea.

"But Ben needs help, too," he murmured. "This new stuff he can do, I don't know how he's doing it. I don't how to help him."

"Ben is under a lot of stress because he doesn't have his father to depend on. That's why he's acting out."

"Yeah. . . ." Nik looked at the floor for a moment, but lifted his head with the hard truth of it. "But it's not going to stop."

Her eyes flashed up.

Nik was dead serious, "Gina, you must recognize that." He shook his head with whispering severity. "I'll get help. I'll stop drinking. I'll be there for him. And for you. And he'll calm down for a while... But baby, it's not going to stop. If we don't get him help, he's going to end up hurting somebody or himself, and it's going to be an accident."

Gina's face began to crumble and tears dribbled down her cheeks. "He's only seven."

Nik reached over and put a hand on her knee. "I know. I know. But all the better to help him now so that he knows what to do with this stuff before he faces puberty."

She coughed and widened her eyes at that possible tragedy.

He let her consider the depth of that, to look around the air and try to sort through her jumbled thoughts. She shook her head some more. "How come you didn't go through this?"

His brown eyes fell into memory, al the flashes of youth, the incidents, the struggles, the drama. He breathed it. "I _did_... in my own way." He angled his head to look her in the eye. "But I had a mentor who knew how to teach me to handle it."

Ben Kenobi. Gina had never met the man, but she'd knew plenty about Nik's memories of him. Now they knew who he really was. Now, when Nik looked back and reflected on grandpa's influence, all those incidents, all those dramas of his youth, he could see how Ben Kenobi's gentle instruction were angled toward a specific curriculum. Nik just didn't recognize it at the time.

Nik huffed a few sighs through his nose before admitting this to her for the first time. "I've been drinking a lot lately. . ." His mind flashed to a moment of drowning in black liquid. "Because something they did to me." His eyes pinched closed. He couldn't put it into words yet. "And now something is different. I can't control it. I don't know what to do with it. And it won't shut up. The beer seems to numb it. A little. For a while. " He shook his head at his hands. "I don't know if I'm an alc- " He choked on it, but forced himself to say the word he swore to the death he would never label himself with, "an alcoholic yet..." And he faced her down again. "But I accept that I might be. But even if I never have a drink again for the rest of my life, I need help with this . . . this other 'thing'. . . I need to learn how to deal with all this in a different way. It's gonna take more than a bacta dunk or a counselor or. . . . "

She leaned forward and set her elbows on her prim pinched knees. She scrunched her face in an attempt not to cry.

Nik leaned over too and cuddled the side of his head into hers, whispering the harsh truth of it. "And Ben is going to go though the same thing. If we don't get him help, Gina, baby, he's going to follow right in my footsteps and into the wrong solutions."

She covered her face with a palm, and Nik was prepared to scoot closer and hold her, but her hands came up to make him stop.

He stopped.

Gina sniffed and lifted her chin. Her dark eyes drilled into him. And her voice was as much of a cutting razor as her words. "Right now, what Ben needs most is stability. And you have disrupted that stability. I recognize that you need the kind of help that isn't available here. So _you go do what you have to do_."

Nik's heart broke.

"Let's. . . take a break." She said crisply. "Let me raise my son in peace and quiet, at least for a little longer, and you take some time to **_fix it_**." Her voice sliced when she hissed that. But she softened with sad sympathy. "Figure it out. And then you can come back and be what Ben needs so he doesn't have to leave _home_."

Nik set his elbows on his knees and pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes sockets.

There were tears in her voice now, she was begging. "I miss you. I miss my husband. And Ben misses his dad. You used to happy. You used to be fun. And dependable. You were the pillar of strength that kept us standing through the rough times. I need that man back... _Please_ go find him."

His palm came down to press over his mouth. Nik's eyes and forehead were red. His head looked like he was about to explode. But he clenched his jaw and fought the tears and stiffened into a knot.

After a moment, Gina set down her cup and got up from the chair.

Nik's jaw nearly splintered trying to keep it together, especially when he heard her call out to the patio, "Ben, come inside and say goodbye to your dad."


	14. LL6 13 Visit to Division One

It was part of their Jedi duty, so Luke and Kess didn't feel it wrong to run the Iktri Hemisphere Watch on a weekday. They talked a little about their differing opinions and observations of the current mediation argument, but didn't settle on a resolution just yet. They never finished the discussion, for both of them grew distracted with a sort of giddy curiosity to march down the wide ramp and into the hangar bays of Division One.

Somehow, they expected to see something familiar, but nothing was. A-wings not X-wings. The Alliance _fleur dis lis_ was sliced in half and sloppily spot-welded to a half of the Imperial crest. The grease grunts wore coveralls of pale gray, not green. The pilots were in black. And none of the faces rang a bell.

As they came into the giant hangar, a tall commander with neat cut blond hair saw them first. Her bright blue eyes popped open. She turned her head with a loud command. "All Hands! Fall in!'

Heads bounced up from work. Tools set down. Boots trotted over. By the time Luke and Kess finished the distance, every living body on the pad had fallen into ranks with Commander Garyn at their front corner. "Atten- _tion_!"

Luke stopped his feet to face them all and eyed Garyn with grinning questions.

Kess's gaze grazed over the faces, now standing in neat rows in front of them, and found Klivian. She smiled. He winked.

Commander Garyn addressed Luke. "Forgive me, my Lord, I was not informed there would be an inspection."

Luke's mouth grinned more. He angled his head. "I'm not here to inspect you," he said. "Where is Commander Antilles?"

Garyn's eyes flicked. A soldier jumped out of ranks to rush away.

She seemed to struggle with Luke's presence. "May I asked the purpose of your visit?"

Luke's eyes tightened on her. He shifted his feet to face her even if she wouldn't look him in the eye. "My visit has nothing to do with you. Or your team. But I see that somehow my presence unsettling. "

The soldier returned to his spot in the ranks and Wedge strolled easily out of a backroom. He and Kess exchanged glances, but all paid attention to Luke facing down Commander Garyn.

"Commander," Luke shook his head with kindness, "My presence should be anything but unsettling."

To this, her eyes flicked up to stare at Luke. Kess felt the stab of hate like it was a poke in the ribs.

Luke stayed dead center in front of the woman and stared right back. Finally, he shrugged a little. "Say it."

"Say what?" Her voice was ice.

He shrugged again and grinned. "Whatever it is you're burning to say. Get it out of your system. Get it over with so that when I come to visit, my presence isn't so disrupting."

"With respect, my lo-

"Just say it," he almost whined.

She huffed through her nose. Her mouth rippled tensely. And her teeth barred when she finally let him have it. "I had friends on that Death Star."

Luke's shoulders relaxed. He kept her gaze and nodded understanding. His brow flicked, and he spoke with ease. "And I had friends on Alderaan."

The air tightened.

Luke shifted his feet and offered a handshake to her. "Truce?"

Garyn seemed to struggle with this, but refused to let it show. She stared at his hand for a beat, then returned the handshake swiftly and sharply just to get the moment over with.

Luke turned away and met Wedge's eye. "I'm not here on official business. You can let your people resume their duties."

Wedge turned his face and called. "Fall out."

Ranks broke and the crowd dispersed. Luke finished his stroll to Wedge and Garyn forced her feet to come around and join the smaller crowd. "Will you be requiring anything from me, Commander?"

Wedge's eyed at Kess and Luke before angling his head toward Garyn. "Only require you to calm the fuck down," he joked. "I'm more than willing to whip these guys into better imperial discipline, Garyn, but you need to take a breather and stop reacting to everything like the Emperor's about to show up."

Garyn's mouth pinched with insult. "Thank you, Commander." And she dismissed herself.

As she left, Wedge rolled his eyes before landing back onto Kess. He grinned more.

She gave his new black uniform a comically scrutinizing eye. "You look like a palpy jackass in that thing."

Wedge cocked an eyebrow right back at her. "And you look like a civilian."

Kess smiled from ear to ear. "Okay, you win that round."

By now, two pilots had snuck up to the group. Klivian hung an elbow on Luke's shoulder and Rogan stood by Kess in wait for her attention.

"How are you guys?"

"We wanna see it." Klivian commanded quietly.

Her eyes shifted. Luke grinned at the deck. Wedge crossed his arms at his chest. "Sorry. Didn't think I had the right to keep it from 'em."

Kess wanted to show them but, "We haven't done a press release yet. Let's go in an office or something."

As the four strolled to the back to disappear into the locker room all saying hellos as they walked. Klivian and Rogan swarmed around Kess as she pulled out the wedding locket for them to admire.

Meanwhile, Wedge and Luke stayed out of the way so Wedge could ask in secret. "Want T suits?"

"Do we need them?"

"Not if you're not going into battle."

"Load a pair up in seat storage just in case."

Wedge nodded affirm and stepped away to order someone to do something.

Finally, Kess spread her palms at Luke. "Not that I don't mind the visit, but what are we doing here?"

"I told you," he grinned guilty as he strutted back over. "We're going to go do the Iktri inspection."

She motioned, "Yeah, but the hopper's parked on the other side of the district."

Luke set his feet strong and locked his knees, his old Commander stance. "We're not taking the hopper."

Klivian patted Kess on the shoulder and Rogan whispered to her as he turned to go. "You might want to wear a diaper."

At Wedge's gentle ushering, the pilots left the room, and he prepared to go too, but paused to report to Luke. "A2187. In the corner." He tossed a key card at Luke. "Artoo's already loaded."

"Thanks."

Wedge left.

Kess's brow winkled with grinning confusion. "How-?"

Luke winked and dashed his head. "Let's go check it out."

Kess didn't understand exactly what was happening. A-wings were one-seaters, and yet he only borrowed one of them from Division One. She looked at the craft as they approached, admiring the lack of scuffs in the paint, the smell of fresh grease and recent fuel up. Repair grunts (all strangers) were finishing up the pre-flight check and Luke shimmied up the ladder like a kid on a playground. He checked the under seat compartment for the T-suits and secured it closed again. Then climbed in and sat as far back on the seat as he could.

Artoo whistled a complaint from the socket. _This thing is still wet behind the ears._

Luke smiled and fumbled down the side of the seat as Kess stepped up to the top of the ladder as if she were boarding this pilot. "What the hell are you up to?"

"A-wings are designed for all kinds of bipedal pilots." The seat was shaped like a weight bench, with room on either side for all variety of sizes and shapes for legs. Luke bit his lower lips and pinched and eye shut to find what his hand was groping for, and with clunk, the seat back came loose. He shoved against his feet and pushed it as far back as it would go, leaving plenty of room for Kess to get in too.

Her smile hid behind her surprise. "You've got to be kidding."

"Climb in." He said, his tongue dug guiltily into a molar but still didn't mask the boyish glee in his eyes.

"I have a bad feeling about this." But Kess climbed in, clumsily and with uncertainty. She wasn't sure how best to set her feet or how to stay out of the way. He pulled the seat back forward until she was practically straddling the stick like it was a dildo, and pulled the buckles out on the brown straps so the five point harness would contain them both.

"This isn't designed for two people." She warned as his hands clasped the latch at her stomach, smashing her back firmly to his front.

"We'll manage."

This was crazy. Even though they were only going on a boring perimeter watch, this was just plain crazy, Kess kept her arms pinched down to her sides, wishing she had something other than his outer thighs to hold onto. Her focus was to stay out of the way so he could reach the stick, that now was suddenly reminiscent of an erection sticking up from her crotch.

The canopy came down and sealed them in, and the air tightened. Kess trembled with excitement, and listened to how different it sounded to hear his voice say the same old thing from inside the cockpit.

"Tower. A-2187. Request permission to launch."

There were a few differences in protocol, a few different sounds than what she was used to, but she knew exactly what was going on inside and outside the ship as the easy procedure commenced. Artoo's text came on the tiny screen and Luke flipped a switch behind his head so he could get audio too. "No, you don't have to record anything until we get there."

Artoo whistled a warning. Life support wasn't designed for two humans. They'd run out of oxygen in 72 hours. Kess knew he was right.

Luke dismissed it. "We'll be back by the end of the day."

A voice sounded on the comm. "A2187, Tower. You are cleared for launch. Vector 234 to nova east, then ballistic to shield gate."

Kess braced herself.

"Tower, A2187. Roger that. Vector 234 for nova east. Ballistic to shield gate. Save us some supper."

Luke pulled back the throttle and the ship lifted into the air.

This was wildly exciting. Kess tried not to enjoy herself too much. But this felt like a little kid dream come true. Luke's front smashed into her back like a cuddling protector, in complete control of everything that was happening, and perfectly comfortable to handle whatever came about. He cruised them slow and easy out the launch port and into the open air. Kess tried to see the cityscape disappear below without moving her head. His chin rested against her cheek so he could see. And his face was wide with smile. G-forces swung them gently, and he angled the ship until they were resting on their backs. Her stomach stretched like she was riding a roller coaster. And the man who would be her husband wrapped around her back like he wasn't ever going anywhere. Kess's cheeks began to hurt from smiling so much.

He slowed them to get through the shield gate, cruising at a polite speed to wait his turn in traffic, and cruised away with an easy lane of traffic. He sailed them away from the planet, then tucked out of the lane and sped up as he aimed them for the open black.

Kess eyed the blinking buoys of a hyperspace launch point as they passed it by.

"Where are we going?"

"We're going to have a little fun first."

"Oh god oh god oh god." She crunched and grinned.

"Ready?" His voice smiled.

Kess panicked. "Yes. No. What are you going to do?"

Luke bit his lips and yanked the throttle back. Kess yelped as speed created its own gravity. Her back smashed into his front even more. His fist twitched the stick between her legs to barrel roll the A-wing in the sky.

Coruscant rose and set over the canopy a half dozen times before it flattened out. Now the gem planet and lines of busy traffic were far enough away to see the whole thing in a single pane of the canopy.

Luke touched the breaks and flattened out.

"Man, I like how thing handles," Luke's smile was stuck in his throat.

"You're not going to do anything stupid are you?"

"Eh, stupid is in the eye of the beholder," he chuckled.

"Okay, I think I need to buy you a toy so you can get this stuff out of your system on a regular basis."

"I wouldn't turn it down." He typed a few commands by his elbow.

She realized he was programming the nav computer for hyperspace and felt a little nervous going into hyperspace without wearing T-suits in this little thing. The deadliness of space was _right_ there, on the other side of this thin, transparent sheet of canopy. And there really wasn't enough room for them to pull out and put on those T-suits hiding in the compartment under their butts.

Yet, if there was one thing she was sure of, she trusted _him_.

"Ready?" he asked.

She grabbed the outside of his thighs to keep her arms out of his way, prepared herself, and smiled, "Do it."

Luke flipped the switch, and stars streaked into waving lines.

Her stomach flipped, but her back was cradled into the most safe thing in the galaxy. The G-forces drifted to nothing. The silence compressed in their ears. Kess tried not to watch the distant streak of stars in the sides of her vision else she would get dizzy.

Zero G.

Soon after their biological matter caught up with the speed of hyperspace, Luke lifted both hands from the controls. Kess wanted him to grab the stick again to keep them steady, she fumbled his hand to make him do that, and began to take the stick when he didn't.

But he pulled her hands back from everything. "No, no. Let it go. Artoo's got us now."

Artoo whistled status report. Speed. Direction. Life support status. 1.97 hours to Iktri.

Luke addressed Artoo. "I'm going to mute us a little bit. But you're still on, okay?"

Artoo whistled back. _No sex in the cockpit._

Luke chuckled and thumbed the mute control.

Kess eyed his arms moving around to figure out what he was doing. "Do you usually have sex in the cockpit?"

Luke snorted. "No. He's just saying that because you're in here."

"Have you ever done anything like this before?"

"No." His voice quieted, but his smile was still shining from his Force print.

"So what do you usually do in hyperspace?" They didn't have any where to go, to eat, to do . . .

"This." His voice was tender. His hands took the back of hers and wrapped both sets of arms around her stomach. His mouth and face snuggled into her cheek and shoulder, Kess felt the fluttering Force suddenly settle, but not entirely, and she closed her eyes, dropping the back of her head to his shoulder and let her whole existence settle to rest in this super silent, super sedating meditation.


	15. LL6 14 The Watch

Iktri glowed green beneath them. Luke took the stick again and rolled them to fly upside down over the landscape below. He called into At'Bintar to report his presence and purpose and flew straight and true along the invisible hemisphere below. Artoo recorded photocaps of the handful constructions they saw. Clearly the At'Bintarians were hard at work building wooden structures that were probably monk cloisters and prayer temples. Kess had never eyed a lush geography as naked as this one, and it took time before she figured out certain square-ish shaped hills and raw cuts into the sides of mountains were signs of the planet's ancient archaeology. They found more new construction, and most of the time they couldn't figure out what was going up, but Luke reminded her it was not their place to judge, just report, and mediate any arguments between the factions if they disagreed about any of it.

Sailing further over the curve of the little moon they began to see Tyronan structures going up on the other side of the invisible line, staying in their own hemisphere as they should. These guys were building with stone instead of wood. The style of architecture was starkly different. Just in the differences in architecture and layout of all these budding settlements, Kess could see why these two planets needed a neutral party to help them get along.

It took some time to circle the moon on the bordering hemisphere, and they angled around to repeat the trip along three other latitudes. As they angled once more to finish the last, Luke pulled his hand back from the stick and took hers.

"Your turn."

"Uhhhhh," she smiled big and nervous.

He wrapped her hand around the stick and held it there. "You went to flight school," he reminded her.

"Yeah, but I barely passed."

He slipped his hand away from the back of hers and tucked his elbows back so she could have complete control. "You've got this."

Hesitant, Kess sat up a little and tugged the throttle gently back. Every twitch of her hand on the stick sent a bump in the yaw. Only once did he reach around and wrap his hand around hers to steady the thing out, instructing to keep her wrist loose. "The ship can feel how nervous you are. It'll panic from it. You have to relax."

"It's ship, not a pet."

"But it responds like a pet. Just like droids do. It's looking to you for confidence. Give it to it."

This helped somehow. Kess still breathed heavy to keep her cool, afraid to blink her eyes, afraid to move too fast. She flew the fast fighter over the dome of the little green planet and began to see why pilot's get so addicted to this stuff. Too soon, she noticed they were about to pass by a snow-capped peak in the shape she recognized. She pulled back the throttle and tapped the brakes.

"That's it, isn't it?"

"Yeah. You wanna land it?"

"No."

"Awe, come on," he whined softly. "It's not like there's anything out here to hit."

"Except for that mountain!"

"That thing is a dozen klicks away." He put her hand back on the stick. "Come on, grease monkey. I know you know how to do it."

Kess blow a careful breath out of her lips and took command again. She hit the dampers and eased the throttle to nothing, but she had to look around for the moorings because she wasn't familiar with A-wings. Luke pointed and motioned to something else too. "Don't forget the landing gear," he laughed.

She wanted to elbow his ribs, but she need to concentrate. She elbow him later. At first she felt they were lowering too slow, so she eased off the retractors, but then they were falling to fast, and she panicked to push them back to life. The A-wing wavered back and forth, confused, and Luke began to laugh heartily behind her.

"Shut up shut up shut up." She tried not to giggle, tried to keep command of the thing, tried to blink her dry eyes but stared in wide-eyed fear out the canopy. The tree-line rose into view ahead of her and the green field stretched all around -

 **THUD!**

Their bodies jerked at the sharp landing. Luke dropped his head back against the seat and giggle madly.

Kess pinched her mouth with laughing anger and quickly flipped the switches to secure moors, shut down life support, release Artoo, and trigger the canopy.

Air hissed in. Her ears popped. She fidgeted with the five point harness to release this tight grip on their bodies. Once their veins had enough room to pump again, she scooted forward enough to twist her body around and glare at the man laughing at her.

But Luke settled. He kicked back in the cockpit like it was his favorite kind of easy chair and his laughter settled to a pink-cheek grin. Blue eyes shined at her like she was the only thing out here worth looking at.

She didn't elbow him. Instead, she fell into his chest and kissed him. And his arms wrapped around her like he was never going to let her go.

Artoo opted to stay in his socket just because it was too much of a pain in the ass to get in and out without crane help. Luke and Kess stepped out onto the trim wing and jumped down to the grassy field. They brought the academy notes, but didn't really need to take them out of the ship's compartment. Both already knew the first set of buildings that had to go up.

First, infrastructure. Water reclamation, on the beach or use the stream? Sewage, what part of this gorgeous landscape were they willing to permanently scare with the ugly tank. Landing pad, should new arrivals come down a ramp to see the ocean first, or that beautiful mountain peak?

They strolled around for a few hours, hiking the edge of the tree line for part of it, following the stream for part of it, admiring flowers they didn't want o have to disrupt with construction, took a few stops to drink in the smell of wet trees. They agreed that, after the infrastructure, dorms should go up first, and the beach house last. Everyone could stay in the dorms while the rest of it was being built, even the construction crews. Besides the beach house was a nice to have. And while Kess admitted how fitting his idea was to offer it, she pointed out that it really didn't need to be built on the cliff face. Just having a beach nearby was perfect enough by itself.

That's when Luke poked in a comment that wasn't entirely a joke. "Well, true, putting it up here would give us enough room to build a house with enough bedrooms."

Her mouth twitched confusion. She turned her feet and looked down the length of the field to the distant drop off to envision all this. "Sweet sandy, how many bedrooms do we need?"

His voice tried to sound casual. "Oh, fifteen or so." He cleared his throat and humor sparkled on the Force.

Kess elbowed his ribs.

He smacked her on the cheek and let go. "Let's go home."

Kess's feet didn't move right away. She looked over at him. "We are home."

His feet paused. He smiled back at her, then looked around the place, drinking in a breath of fresh green air, and let his eyes fall on her again. "Then let's go back and start building it."

She smiled too, looked around once more, not wanting to leave this perfect place, and skipped into a trot to pass him by, "I wanna fly the launch this time."

The visit to the Iktri field was cleansing enough on its own, but the two hour meditation on the way there and back cleansed them even more. Even when they weren't focused on Jedi peace, they still found peace having this simple fun together. Luke lowered the A-wing to the deck of Division One and Kess was a little bummed that the fun was over, but she also felt ready to take on the galaxy.

The canopy lifted and the droid suction inched over their heads to get Artoo. A ladder rolled up as Luke unlatched them from the belts and a face popped up.

Wedge draped an elbow across the cockpit edge. "So? How was it?"

Luke shouted through his smile. "She almost killed us!"

"I did not! I wasn't the one flying like our ass was on fire."

Wedge scrunched aside the ladder. Kess stood from the bench and Wedge offered a hand to help the ground pounder out. Luke stood too and waited for Kess to get down.

Wedge grinned at Luke, "How'd she handle?"

"I want one," Luke sounded horny.

"I'm sure you do," Wedge grinned. "I actually got in a little trouble for this though. I'm not going to be able to lend you one again."

Luke hid an unintelligible grumble, but sighed fast and nodded, "Copy that."

As they waited together while Artoo was lowered to the deck, Kess lowered her volume and eyed Wedge. "I know I shouldn't ask."

Wedge pressed his mouth and dropped his sights to his own shoes. Luke shook his head at Kess.

She struggled with it, but murmured quieter. " _I am_ trying to keep my nose out of it. _Really_ , I am. _But_."

Wedge lifted his face and sighed impatience through his nose at her.

She looked him in the eye. "For what it's worth, she _wants_ you to comm her. She's just shy. Ever more so now that she can't talk."

Wedge stuffed his hands in his pockets and rolled his shoulders back, but his chin remained low to eye her with discipline and warning. "I will, but later. I have a project I have to complete first."

Her face scrunched. "What kind of project?"

Luke stepped up and touched her on the elbow.

She whipped her elbow away, and yelled in her whisper to Wedge. "All I'm talking about is a simple comm call! If you don't jump on it soon, Wedge, you're going to lose the chance. She's talking about tossing her career and moving to Yaga Minor."

He seemed to absorb that news with discomfort, but it didn't seem to motivate him at all either. He whispered defeated, and his eyes begged her to back off without the message being too obvious to any onlookers.

Kess tried to calm herself down from the frustration of this. She patted his elbow and nodded defeat, but she was still splintering with aggravation as she walked away.

Luke and Wedge exchanged glances, but didn't need to say anything. They patted the backs of each other's shoulders and turned away from each other.

Kess marched hard off the pad so fast that Luke needed to trot to catch up with her. Once they were around the corner and beyond, now burning fast through the wide public walk 'off base' Kess grumbled. "What kind of project would get in the way of a simple comm call?"

"Kess, let it go." Luke warned in a low voice.

"Do you know what the project is?"

He shot a warning glance across her bow.

"I'm just-" She huffed as she marched. "He's going to lose his shot if he doesn't move quickly. Why is he acting so shy?"

Luke grabbed her arm and stopped her in the street. He looked down at her with firm, kind eyes. "I know you care about Yana, but the only reason why you're pressing this _this_ much is because you think you're fulfilling some promise to Kayla and Joanne."

Kess rubbed her lips shut and looked away. She hadn't thought of it on those terms.

"Kess, you know him extremely well," he challenged quietly. "Ask yourself: Is Wedge _shy_?"

She shook her head vaguely, "No, but . . . Do you know what the project is?"

He dropped his hand from her arm. "No. And I wouldn't tell you if I did."

That stung a little, but only for a moment. She straightened her back and nodded at nothing in the crowd. "I respect that," she whispered.

"Let it go," he whispered back.

She nodded again, swiveled on her heels, and resumed their fast walk away.


	16. LL6 15 Wedding Plans

Kess and Luke stepped easily between the Purple shrouded sentries and right down the middle of Leia's office common. The place was a buzz of activity, and no one really gave them a second glance as they walked right up to Winter's desk and reported in for their appointment.

Soon, Yana stepped up beside them with datafolios in her arms and smiled hello at them both. Kess smiled at her but didn't say anything. As they paused to smile at each other, eyes saying everything their mouths couldn't / wouldn't, a man in Imperial black uniform and purple guard accents stepped up to Yana's side with a datacard. "The information you requested."

Yana took it from him. The man then turned his feet to the Jedi, snapped his heals and bowed. Luke eyed the man with distrust, but they never got the chance for formal introductions.

Leia stepped out with the group of her previous appointment and smiled sweetly to bid good bye. Instead of facing and bowing like she usually greeted new arrivals, this time she just turned her feet back around to the her office, flicked her head and winked an eye for them to come in there with her.

Luke nodded at the Black and Purple Guard. "Excuse us," and turned to leave the man behind.

Kess was a little surprised that Yana stepped in with them, but that made sense. She was visibly more surprised when the Black and Purple Guard stepped in behind Yana and closed the five of them in the room together.

This guy was an Imperial. Kess could tell by the way he stood and snapped his heals at things, by the way he bowed and lifted his chin with haughtiness at things. She thought this meeting was going to be about the wedding, and since it wasn't public yet, why would an Imperial be in here to listen to it?

Her eyes shifted with uncertainty back to Leia. The Lord Chamberlain stepped around her desk and moved a datacard from one pile to another, but she didn't sit down. Luke and Kess stood easy side by side in front of her, though were still clearly reporting as ordered. Kess expected this meeting to be quick. They had nothing to report because they hadn't talked about any of it yet. Kess had ideas, sure, but she didn't expect the final say on any of it. Besides, they were supposed to be partners now.

Yana sat down in a side chair and switched on her notepad.

"Okay." Leia peeped brightly as she popped a snack into her mouth. She eyed the two Jedi as she chewed and rubbed her palms together. When she swallowed the bite, her voice was bright. "Talk."

"We don't have much," Luke warned.

Leia shrugged her hands and set her knuckles on her desk. "What _do_ you have?"

"Um." Luke and Kess nearly eyed each other, but didn't really need to.

Leia took the initiative and gestured. "First man?"

Luke blinked. That one was easy. "Wedge, of course."

Leia motioned to Kess. "First lady?"

Kess pointed over at Yana on the side. Yana grinned big.

Leia nodded. Then, "When?"

"After the academy is built," Luke said automatically.

"Time table?"

"A year or two?" Luke shrugged.

"No." Leia declined and popped another bite into her mouth. She grinned over her chewing. "Too long. Try again."

Luke flattened his mouth. "Let us get at least a functioning infrastructure and the first couple of facilities built."

"Okay. Time table of _that_."

"Six months? Maybe?"

She accepted that with a nod. "Good." Her eyes changed. A new question. "Big or small?"

"Small," they said in unison.

"Can't be too small," Leia warned.

Luke sighed for more grinning patience. "As small as we can get away with."

Kess grew more comfortable with this discussion as she realized they were already on the same page about all of it so far. Kess shrugged to defend his statement. "Iktri can't host a whole lot of people."

Leia's eyes changed. She slowly nodded and sat down in her desk chair. "So you _are_ going to have it at the academy."

"Well yeah. Of course."

"Even though you could have a big one here," she taunted.

Luke and Kess eyed each other, smiled bashfully, and sighed.

Leia explained gently. "Guys, this is a huge symbol of the reformation. The bigger we can make it the better."

Luke drooped his head aside. He had no problems declining the galaxy's curiosity about his private life. "They can watch the damn thing on the vid."

Leia folded her elbows on the desktop and softened her voice. Her eyes aimed at Luke as though she was trying to pull a Force Persuade on him. "Are you _sure_ you won't consider having it here?"

"No." He stood firm on this, and stared his sister down.

"Why?"

"Because it's my wedding," he said. And that was the end of it.

Kess interrupted respectfully. "I'm in agreement on that."

Leia flattened her mouth and shared a glare of impatience with Yana. Yana spread a tight grin and a shy grimace.

Leia sat back her big chair and set her hands on her lap, cradling the growing belly. "Press release?"

Luke shrugged, "Whenever you want the news cycle. I don't care."

Kess shrugged too. Agreement.

"Who knows?"

Luke thumbed. "Wedge. Yana. Couple Rogue group pilots." He looked over to Kess.

"My brother and his wife, but they won't say anything to anyone."

"No?"

Kess shook her head. "They won't want to be around if my father finds out by accident."

Leia closed her mouth with respect. "You should comm him right before the press release."

Kess nodded fervently. She was already planning that.

"Will he come to the ceremony?"

"I doubt it." Kess had to admit aloud. Her soul grew somber.

Leia gave her eyes of sympathy. "I'm sorry."

"S'okay," Kess assured gently. "Not your fault." Then she added, "Or your father's."

Leia's eyes changed, she spread a soft smile at that respect and shifted her shining eyes to Luke. Luke rippled a grin to it and changed the subject. "May _I_ ask a question now?"

"Sure."

He thumbed over his shoulder. "If this is still confidential, why are we having this Q and A in front of an Imperial?"

Kess glanced over her shoulder at the gentlemanly purple guard standing parade rest by the door. "That is a good question."

Leia adjusted her hands on her knee. "The purple guard assigned me a private security team."

"What's wrong with Chewie?" Kess peeped concern.

"Chewie's fine. He just can't do it alone."

Luke blanched. "A bodyguard to stand _inside_ your office?"

Leia shined with humor. "Not usually, no. He's here for the details because he's going to have to ensure security for me at the wedding."

Luke flashed a silent laugh. His voice crooned with deep disbelief. "You're going to be on a nearly naked planet surrounded by Jedi, rebels, and at least one extremely protective Wookiee. What _possible_ security measure are we not already going to cover?"

Leia smiled at the humor of it. "This is for the optics, Luke. I am neither Alliance or Imperial. The galaxy needs to see me being protected by both poliltical parties."

Luke sucked in a sign but flicked his brow to accept that.

"Which also means: You guys area going to need to invite Imperials to this thing."

Kess dropped her head back and groaned at the ceiling.

"For the optics," Luke said flatly.

Leia nodded.

Luke huffed out a breath of defeat.

Leia shook her head slowly to lay down a gentle law. "Have it on Iktri and as small as you can, I will grant you that, but we need the reformation crystal clear in every photo cap. Do it however you want to, but we need the visual."

Both Kess and Luke knew she was right, and agreed with it, but they didn't like it. Not because they minded so much having Imperials there, but the size of Iktri meant they were going to have to _not_ invite a bunch of people they wanted just to make room for strangers that couldn't give a damn about their union.

Leia continued. "I'll have Questah write up a release and send it to you for approval before we post. Kess, let me know once you've told your father. I won't move before that."

"Yes, ma'am."

Leia looked to Yana. "Have you taken her shopping for the ball yet?"

Yana began to nod and angled her head with not the best of news.

Kess explained, "I didn't find anything that I liked."

Leia wrinkled her lips at her desk, cleared her throat, then tucked brown eyes back up to Kess for her turn at a Force Pursuade kind of look.

Kess flattened her lips to her teeth and smiled tightly. "But I will keep looking, apparently."

Leia grinned to Luke with that success, and she didn't even need to use the Force to make it work.

He just grinned at the floor.

"Anything else?" Leia asked them.

"No." Kess said.

"No." Luke admitted. "We'll get to work on it."

Leia nodded deeply and waved them to go away. "Thanks for coming by."

Kess and Luke shared a glance of trapped sighs and overwhelmed grins as they faced each other and marched out of Leia's office.

Yana got up, but Leia motioned her to stay. She eyed Ren Entada instead. "You may wait outside now."

Ren Entada clicked his heels, ducked his chin, and marched out too, closing the door behind him.

Leia set her elbow on the desk and her mouth in her hand, thinking hard.

Yana waited for instruction.

Leia's eyes flicked to her, grinned a little, and she turned for the intercom switch. "Winter, can you please get Division One Command on the comm for me?"

"Yes, ma'am."

Leia released the button with a dramatic lift of her finger and turned her eyes over to Yana again. Then she almost smirked at the admin. "Breathe."

Yana slammed her eyes shut and bowed her flushing face to her own lap.

Leia chuckled and when the comm screen rose from the flat of her desk, she reached over and angled it away. "Here, I'll make it easier for you." She shifted her big chair an inch to get in front of its new aim. Now, the camera would not have enough wide range to see Yana on the side of the desk, and Yana couldn't see the image on the screen either.

After a moment, Winter commed back through the audio. "Division One Command on line four."

Leia settled comfortably in her chair and hit the button.

Yana heard a woman's voice. "Division One Command. Commander Garyn. What can I do for you, Lord Chamberlain?"

Leia flicked an odd smile. "I need to speak with Division One's actual commander, please."

"He is temporarily detained. Is there some way I could be of service?" Clearly, Garyn wanted to handle this one on her own.

Leia pressed her mouth. "Will he be long?"

There was a pause before Garyn replied. "One moment."

After a beat, the noise shuffled. And Wedge's voice carried a little of happiness to take this call. Yana watched her own lap and listened to his voice.

"Well hello, Lord Chamberlain!" His voice smiled big, then settled to smiling business. "What can I do for ya?"

Leia lifted her brows. "You can confirm are we on a secure line."

Click. A pause . . . and a door closed. "We are now secure. What's up?"

"I need to ask you a favor," Leia told him. "One in the in strictest of confidentiality. And I need you to not wonder what it's about."

Wedge voice chuckled. "Standard operating procedure, your highness. What do you need?"

Leia smiled at the teasing title but kept to business. "I understand your going to be first man at the wedding."

"Ah!" He peeped, then laughed again. "News to me. But doesn't surprise me. Why?"

"Luke needs to get a suit or the Senate Ball coming up."

"Um, sure?"

"I want you to accompany him in that search so you can roll in the work of establishing and ordering the attire for the men in the wedding party."

"When's the wedding?"

"Not for some time," Leia admitted, "but I need those outfits ready as soon as possible."

"Um," he began to wonder but stopped himself from doing so. "Okay. Yes, ma'am. I'll get on it. Do we know yet how many men, or which men I'm going to have paper doll up?"

Leia angled her head. "You, Luke, and her brother so far that I know. I'll have Yana send you what details we have."

The air coming through the comm seemed to chill.

"Oh. . . ." He murmured. "Okay. . . ." His tone had lost all its lilt.

Yana felt the insult in her stomach.

Leia explained it simply. "She's going to Kess's first lady, Wedge."

"Oh! Yeah. Of course."

Leia blinked a new grin. "Is that going to be a problem?"

"No!" His voice was bright again, but he was chuckling nervously. "No, no. Not at all. I'll. . . I'll look for her message." He paused, and Yana could hear the hard sigh as though he were leaning too close to the mike. "Anything else?"

Leia pressed a glowing smile, "Be good."

His voice regained its old warmth. "Be safe."

 _Click_.

Leia tuned her face over to Yana. Yana inhaled a breath and calmed her stomach, facing down the Lord Chamberlain on the pretense that Leia couldn't sense how wild her emotions were screaming right now.

Leia motioned her dismissed. "Send him what you have and help him out if he needs it."

Yana nodded tartly and closed down her notes.

Leia stood when Yana did, and both moved to the office door to get the next order of business. But Leia stopped her with a soft touch on the elbow. "Yana."

Yana faced her down with borrowed strength.

Leia smiled sweetly. "Breathe."

Yana scrunched and followed the order with a pink flush.

"Better?"

Yana nodded. Leia swished her out the door. "Go back to work."


	17. LL6 16 Miscommunications

Luke returned to the Jedi Office from his meeting with the Kilrathi and turned in his notes to Raol as he entered. Before he got beyond that, Kess got up from what had become her own little research room and dropped a shoulder on the doorjamb with glowing eyes of angry irony.

Luke was afraid to ask, "What?

"They responded to our infrastructure proposal," she said, gritting her teeth with a hint of humor.

He dropped his shoulder on the other doorjab of the same entry. "Which ones?"

"Both of them."

He glanced at her station and back at her. "And?"

Kess stepped and jerked her head for him to go read it himself. She sat down at her terminal to pull up both messages and leaned against the arm of her chair so he could lean in read it over her shoulder.

His eyes danced across the screen and hers followed along, but she had a molar shoved into her lip as if she was ready to strangle someone.

Suddenly coughed hard and shouted. "You've got to be kidding me!?"

"That was more polite than the response that came out of my mouth," Kess swiveled her chair around to watch him. Luke set both hands on his head, cranked his neck back in disbelief and fell against the wall in defeat.

Kess summarized it in a sing song voice. "At'bintar wants us to use wind power. Tyrona wants us to use solar. At'bintar wants wood structures. Tyrona wants it all to be stone. At'bintar wants us to farm our food. And Tyrona insists we ship it all in."

His voice came out in a loud, bright whine. "What do they expect us to do? Slice 20 klicks down the middle and do it both ways simultaneously?"

Kess shrugged that it wasn't out of the realm of possibilities. "We don't need a whole 20 klicks."

 _"Yet!"_ He smiled through his shout. "Did you think the academy was going to stop training after a dozen? Or a hundred?" He whipped a hand at the terminal. "The whole idea was to have it up and running so it keeps going when I'm gone! Make sure the next generation had a stable launch pad!" He wiped his whole face with one palm and sighed to calm himself down.

Kess climbed out of her chair and went to him. Her face was a calm grin, her eyes were big and sympathetic. She fell into his front and hugged his sides.

Luke drooped his head and eyed the terminal behind her with frustration, then he sighed and dropped his chin to his chest. "This isn't working."

She quieted with respect. "What do you want to do?"

Luke thought for a moment and shook his head again. "I don't know." He started to push her away so he could get back to work on something else.

But she pinned him there, eyeing up at him with friendly support. "The meetings are done for the day," she reminded. "Let's go home."

He closed his eyes for patience. Should they? Shouldn't they?

And she grinned dirty and lowered her voice more. "And pretend to meditate."

Luke snorted a snicker, opened his eyes to grin at her antics and, seeing the wonton guilt in her eyes. . .

... swiveled on his heels to leave as soon as possible.

* * *

Tayla was not wearing her usual glittery tom-boy attire when she sauntered up the Avenue of Core Founders. Instead she wore a pair of fishnet stockings that were bagging at the ankles, a shamrock silk corset wrapped tightly around her prepubescent body, and a pair of red heals that were a little too big for her tiny feet and made her wobble as she tried to saunter.

She'd tried several people so far, but none of them gave her more than a glance. She kept up her slow, swishy walk until she found a new target, opting for a particularly big nice looking older man. His blond-gray hair bounced in his eyes as he walked because his eyes were on the plaza tile in front of his feet. He wore his Senatorial Robes with comfort and carried several folios in one arm. This old guy looked like he was entirely too serious about things.

Tayla walked herself right into his path. "Hey, there big fella." The young girl pressed her little body to his legs, brining her face barely above his crotch, and wrapped her arms around his sides to smile up at him. "Want some company?"

Senator Danje stopped in his tracks so fast his shiny shoes squeaked. His arms retreated from his sides with surprise. Blue-gray eyes narrowed down at her like she was an alien species he'd never seen before. His works barked it, "How old are you?"

Tayla sparkled her smile and warmed her voice. "Does it matter?" She batted her eyelashes up his tall length and pressed her body harder against him. And while she had his complete, undivided attention on that, one hand slipped gently into his pocket-

\- and Danje's hand snatched it right back out again.

Senator Danje held her wrist high like he'd just picked up a sack of potatoes, barely allowing her enough reach to the ground so she could stumble on those over-sized red-healed shoes. Tayla squealed and complained. "All ya had t' do was say 'no'!"

"Security!" Danje marched her down the lane to the first Purple Guard sentry he found. "Find a legal guardian for this rodent and handcuff her to it."

* * *

Yana forced herself to breathe as she returned to her station in the data library. At least, she tried to. She was glad Leia hid her from the vid comm's view. Just to hear Wedge's voice sound so cheery one minute and then so flat the next, falling into discomfort at the simple mention of her name, told Yana everything she needed to know.

She slumped down onto an office chair in defeat, slapped the wedding notes on the desktop, and looked over the tall array of terminals and readouts in front of her that were her life. The wrap over her head was falling off again. At the moment, she no longer cared if anyone saw her bald spot. She pulled the scarf from her head and let her pale brown hair fall free. The air was cold on the naked skin.

She sighed one more time, but this time with maturity. Yana angled her head to pick up the wedding plans, and brought up a mail program.

* * *

Wedge checked his mail more often than usual and clenched his jaw every time. Garyn inquired about the comm call from the Lord Chamberlain, and Wedge simply dismissed her by saying it as a confidential matter. This didn't settle Garyn however, and occasionally eyed his screen when he stepped away from it, wondering what message he was so eager to receive.

Towards the end of the afternoon, Wedge checked his mail again and cussed when he didn't get what he was waiting for. Something was up, Garyn concluded, and reported to him in a murmur that she had to go clear up the billet tangle with dispatch. Commander Antilles waved her off without a care. Garyn left, checked over her shoulder, and turned her feet the wrong direction down the walkway.

 _Bip_.

Wedge looked up from his work and his heart skipped a beat. He glanced to verify Garyn was gone and punched the key.

Commander,

Here are the notes of the event.

Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns.

Lt Yana Dietrich

Senior Data Admin

Office of the Lord Chamberlain

Wedge felt like he'd been stabbed in the stomach. He read the stale message again, then opened the event notes attached. It were hardly more than twenty words. Bullet points of wedding details decided so far. Nothing else.

Wedge deleted the whole thing.

His brown eyes shifted sideways to stare at nothing on the carpet...

 _I guess I have my answer._

He licked his lips closed, sucked in a breath through his nose, and forced himself to get back to work.

* * *

"They're planning something." Garyn said in the gray and black Imperial office. Grand Moff Jakobi sat behind the big black desk, but he had several high ranking command standing by to discuss options and execute orders.

Jakobi wasn't surprised. "Do you have any clues as to what?"

Garyn lower her gaze to the floor. "My apologies, my lord. I've yet to glean the topic of their discussion. But there is a lot of chatter among the rebels of Division One, the Lord Chamberlain's office, and the Jedi."

The Grand Moff considered this and exchanged glances with Admiral Belda.

"A coup?" Belda offered.

"Perhaps. But what power would they try to overturn? They have the majority of the Senate."

"Not by much."

Moff Callen suggested, "They could be planning strategic assassinations of the loyalists so they can retain the majority once we try to flip it."

Jakobi closed his mouth and thought on that. After a moment, he nodded to Garyn. "Thank you for your report. Keep us apprised."

Garyn bowed sharply and marched out of the room.

* * *

Raol popped into the meeting room, "Sorry to inturrupt." Clearly he wasn't sure how to deal with this particular matter. His eyes turned to Kess. "The um- Former Emperor on the comm."

Luke nodded her to go and Kess stepped out of the meeting, closing the door behind her. "Thank you."

Raol pointed to her private office. "I'll transfer him over."

Kess went in and sat down, glad to have an update, and hoped it was good news.

When Nik's face flickered on the screen, she grew instantly concerned. His clothes were crumpled. His brown hair suffered from a case of bed-head. The skin around his eyes were swollen and is eyes bloodshot.

"Hey, Nik. How's it going? Are you allright?"

Nik seemed broken, like this was one of tha hardest calls he ever had to make. He didn't even look her in the eye. "You busy?"

His mouth murmured it, and his head wavered a little as if he didn't quite have his balance. Was he drunk?

"Well, that depends. I'm at work, but . . . what's going on?"

He scrunched his eyes and opened them one at a time, still looking down instead of the screen. "I need a favor."

Kess was truly concerned now. "Anything."

Nik paused a long minute, glanced at his surroundings as if he still hadn't made a final decision on this, then finally lifted his face to try to look her in the eye. "I need you to pick me up from the airport."


	18. LL6 17 A Ride from Yana

Luke strolled into the Lord Chamberlain's offices as many of the staff were walking out. He paused his feet before turning where his eyes stuck on the black and purple man standing guard outside Leia's office. Across the length of the common, Ren Entada met the gaze and nodded a respectful hello. By then, Winter began to stand from her desk to address Luke, but Luke motioned her to disregard. "Social call," and he pointed toward the data library.

Yana had already swiveled her desk chair from her project and lifted her chin to Luke with clear eyes. _What can I do for you?_

Luke dropped his shoulder against a mainframe and lowered his voice to a secret whisper. "Can you give me a ride home?"

She nodded of course, but red-brown eyebrows wrinkled questions.

"Kess had to run the airport a few hours ago. I'll explain in the speeder."

Yana shrugged and nodded, and she began closing down her work, but Luke stopped her with a gentle gesture. "Finish your work first. I'm in no hurry."

With that, he strolled back out to the common and down to Winter's desk. He shrugged an admittance, "Only if she has a minute so I can say 'hi'." Winter turned to the intercom link and typed in a note.

As he waited, Luke's eyes shifted again to the creature in the corner and found something curiously out of place with this man. All the other former Imperials with which he'd recently learned to interact all had emotional reactions to the famous Jedi's presence. They feared him, hated him, didn't trust him, wanted to take advantage of him, or a combination of all of the above. But not this guy.

Luke strolled over and set his feet strongly in front of the sentry, his old commander stance, and glanced the guy up and down.

Ren snapped his heals together and bowed his chin, "Master Jedi, good evening." The respect was genuine.

Luke sensed deeper and grew more concerned that he couldn't find anything worth being concerned about. He angled his head and eyed Ren curiously. "You're not apprehensive around me."

Ren's eyes shifted away and back as if wondering why that would be a factor. "No, sir." His black brown twitched with a touch of humor. "Should I be?"

Grinning oddly, Luke shook his head. "Well, no, but most former-Imperials are."

Ren's mouth shrugged in its own humor. "With respect, of all the people who come in and out of this office, the Chamberlain's safety in _your_ company is the least of my concerns."

Luke angled his head. The man had a good point. . . .

"What's your name again?" Luke asked.

"Ren Entada."

"No title?"

"Purple Command is still debating on what the titles and chain of command will be exactly. In the meantime, I'm something of a Detail Captain, or Commander of sorts. I manage the specific team in charge of protecting the Lord Chamberlain."

Luke took that in, then blinked to realize it. "You're Alderaani." Luke had interacted with so few, it was difficult to pluck out clues in the Alderaani mannerisms and accent. The way this man moved, the way his words sounded almost Inner Rim, but not exactly, matched Leia's patterns significantly.

"I am, sir."

"Where were you when it happened?"

Ren seemed to pause on his answer, though he was going to anyway-

"No. I'm sorry." Luke punished himself with a face and raised his hand. "I shouldn't have asked that. That was rude of me."

Ren didn't have a problem answering it; he just didn't expect the former Rebel would like the answer. "I was serving with Admiral Eidta's Fleet on patrol in the Perlemian Trade Routes."

Luke's brows lifted into his unkempt bangs.

Ren mistook his the expression for confusion. "Yes, Star Destroyers, my lord, tasked with combating piracy and smuggling in the area."

A smile of disbelief splashed across Luke's face, and an index finger flopped out toward the big office doors. "Does _she_ know that?"

Ren swallowed and began to speak, but Leia's doors opened in that moment. She bid her last appointment goodbyes and thank yous, and sat down in Winter's guest chair to face Luke with a weary sigh. "What do you need?"

"Just in the neighborhood." Luke strolled his feet over and stopped in front of where she was now leaning elbows on her knees and burying her face in her palms. "Let's go inside and talk." Leia shoved back to her feet and stepped back in, and Luke closed the door behind them both. She tried to face him, but he turned her away to the nearest couch. "Sit down. Take a minute."

She didn't hesitate to follow his orders. First she sat down and paused for a moment of deep breath and momentary meditation, but then she kicked off her shoes and curled her feet up on the couch beside her, leaning heavily into the throw pillow and armrest. "I don't know how long I can keep this pace."

Luke sat down on the facing couch and watched all the signs. "You shouldn't be keeping this pace at all."

"The baby's fine-

"I'm not talking about the baby."

She rubbed one eye with her fingers and tried to glare at him with the other. Luke's gaze remained steady. He knew her too well, and had too many Force senses to be fooled by her rock solid facade.

She angled her head and gaze away.

"If I were to guess, you're overworking yourself just so that you don't have to think about him."

She spread an understanding grin, but she shook her head and met his eye. "Yes and no. I process it in my own way, in privacy. The work just helps me take it in doses." She shucked a sick smile. "Believe me, Luke, I've been through enough losses to know the procedure."

"I know," he whispered, eyes respectfully on the carpet now.

"How are you holding up?"

He shrugged and gave her a sad smile. "I have Kess."

Her grin warmed for a moment, then died again. "Although I do-" she choked.

Luke felt it the moment her words stopped in her throat. He could see it, how her expression was one of firmness and control, but her insides spiked in a heart-crushing turmoil. "I do admit-"

As Leia tried to fight her throat to let her finish the sentence, Luke shoved off one couch and set down beside her on the other, pulling her shoulders sideways into his chest whether she liked it or not. The whole move had her words tumbling out with quivering tears. "I just wish he would show up and get in my way."

He curled his head around the back of hers and forced her to cuddle into his shoulder, and Leia crumbled into it, crying in a rich quiet for a full minute. She laughed even through her tears. "I wish he would show up and force me to stop work at 20 hundred, to pound on the table any time I start talking about politics at dinner."

Luke too had tears decorating his lashes, but he smiled at these memories too.

She allowed herself a moment of weakness, a moment to lean on her brother's strength, and let out a cleansing sigh and a wistful smile. "By the Force, I miss him."

"Me too."

She pushed to sit up again, patting his knee with thanks.

"You need to slow down," Luke urged her gently.

She huffed with impatience. "I am meditating every day, sometimes twice a day. I'm taking my vitamins and getting enough sleep. Eating healthy meals..."

" _And_ . . ." he lowered his chin, lifted his brows, and eyed her hard, "you still need to slow down."

Leia raised both palms in acquiescence. "All right. I will take it under advisement," she joked.

Luke ushered her to get up. "Go home."

"No, I still have to-"

"No, Leia _, go home."_ He ordered softly, and jerked his chin to the wall chrono. "Look at the time."

She glanced over. 2025. She closed her eyes.

"If Han were here, what would he say right now?"

"You made your point," she tried to glare at him.

But Luke just glared right back. "Go home or I'm going to have that palpy bodyguard of yours cuff you and carry you home."

She wiped her face with her palm. "Okay." When he arched a brow, she climbed to her feet and spread her hands again, "Okay. You win."

Luke hovered in her general presence and served as the duty 'pain-in-the-ass' so she wouldn't try to change her mind before she left the offices. Yana seemed patient to wait for all this too. As Leia murmured notes to Winter and reviewed tomorrow's schedule as the standard end-of-the-day procedure, Luke stepped over to Ren Entada and murmured quietly.

"I'd like you to do me a favor," he said. "At 20 hundred, every night, politely remind her what time it is. See if you can get her to stop for dinner, and try to take away whatever politics she's working on while she eats. Whether she continues to work is not within your power, but I'd like you to gently nudge her in that direction for as much as you can get away with."

Ren's wrinkled his brows at this odd request, but seemed to understand and bowed his chin in compliance. "I understand."

Luke and Yana waited until Leia and Ren left, and walked out of the empty office with Winter for a quiet and exhausted good night. Luke waited until the two of them climbed into Yana's speeder before explaining Nik's arrival, that Gina and Ben didn't, and what that probably meant. He asked her to keep it confidential only because he wanted to save Nik from the press fiasco of "The Emperor Has Returned To Coruscant", but he also asked her to please keep Leia informed of all she heard about Nik's status and progress.

When Yana parked in the valet of the building, and Luke got out, he poked his head back down and offered her to come up and say 'hi'. Yana declined, pressing her palms together and both to the side of her cheek, a sign for 'sleep', then shared her datalink so she could say, But tell her she can call me if she needs girly girl support.

Luke patted the hood and nodded thanks.

Riding up to the apartment, Luke sensed out. Nik was in the back in a fitful sort of statis, asleep probably, and Kess was trying to meditate her way through a bruise of insult. He came in to find the lights low and the droids put away. From a naked spot on the long dining table, Kess opened her eyes and gave him a weary grin.

Luke stepped around and pulled her up for a hug.

"He's resting," she sighed into his chest. "I moved him into other master bedroom."

"What happened?"

"She left him." Kess pulled away and combed her long locks from her face. "I guess he took up drinking as a solution. Kept saying something about how it helps him breathe. I can't figure it out, but something's very wrong. I don't think he's in the condition to start training."

Luke's eyes flicked aside and thought a moment. "His debreif..."

She looked up.

"His debrief didn't say anything about . . ." Suddenly, he looked at her. "Remember when you were on Pad 14 right before the launch and you sensed something from him; you thought he was dead."

"Yeah . . . yeah why?"

"You said something that day about not being able to breathe."

She thought back. "Yeah. I sensed choking or something. Panic mostly. But yeah, your right." She stared at the air. "And there was nothing in his debreif about that."

"I'm going to guess something happened to him that shocked him to his core. He may have blocked it out, or just doesn't want to tell anyone about it but . . ."

"Well, step one is to get him sober."

"True. But remember, light side first, tricks later. Let's just focus on taking care of him for a while. Okay?"

"Yeah." She agreed, but was still distracted, still somber . . . still insulted. Her eyes dropped closed with tension.

Luke angled his head. "What else?"

"I called Gina. Just to tell her he was here so she'd know where he was, that he was getting care, but she hung up on me before I could get a word out." Kess sucked in a hard breath and tried to swallow a lump in her throat. "So I called Dad to see if he could pass on the message. I didn't even intend to say anything about Jedi or training or anything like that. It was just going to be 'Nik's with me', 'I'm taking care of him . . . . "

"And?"

She laughed and cried at the same time, "My locket wasn't inside my shirt for the vid comm." She dove into his chest, clenched the sides of his shirt, and growled violently at herself.

Luke held her and tried to meditate a moment. So, Dane Lendra now knew his daughter was engaged. It was obvious by Kess's suffering that the man did not take the news well.

Her voice squeaked. "Why does my father hate me so much?"

Luke pressed his mouth and held her harder. He wanted to say something consoling, but nothing seemed right, so he tried to crack a joke instead. "Want me to see if I can get my father to beat some sense into him?"

Kess's faces exploded reluctant laughter into his shoulder, and soon Luke was chuckling too.

"I'm sorry," she finally said, smiling up and sniffing hard, "I shouldn't complain."

"Hey," he shrugged it off, took her hand and led her away, "you've got it worse than me."

Her face grimaced comically, "How do you figure?"

"I never tried to have a relationship with mine," he pointed out as he switched on the bedroom light. "And I still got him to turn back somehow." He let her hand go only to sit down and start kicking off his boots. "You're doing everything you can to help yours and he still won't turn it around."

Standing numb, she shifted her eyes. "I never thought of it like that."

Luke sighed through his nose. "The doors are always open for your father. And he knows that. If he doesn't walk through them, that's his problem. And there's nothing you can do about that."

Kess accepted defeat and sat down on the foot of the bed next to him so she could take off her boots too.

"As for Nik," Luke murmured, "I'll train him when the time comes, but for now, let's just both work on nursing him back to sanity."

In seconds, they'd stripped all they were going to and crawled into bed. They cuddled close in their usual position, but this time Kess stared passed his neck to nothing beyond, worrying about Nik, Gina, Ben, and her dad. Luke stared passed her hair and beyond thinking about Leia, Breha, Chewie, and Han. And Wedge was struggling with survivor's guilt so much that he didn't have the guts to comm a girl. And Yana was suffering brain damage and would never speak again without a prosthetic.

There were so few family members left . . . and even those seemed to be falling apart at the seams.


	19. LL6 18 Flashback-Wedge's Tipping Point

"I give up." Wedge huffed. Wearing his crumpled uniform from yesterday, in desperate need of a cup of java, his black hair an unwashed mess, Wedge was halfway back to his speeder with the gas giant just now rising beyond the horizon when he realized he had already lost the war.

This time, it ended before it began. One night. That was it. He told her up front he wasn't looking for anything serious. He learned a long time ago to always tell them that up front, and say it in clear, no-uncertain terms. And that was usually how he worded it, "not looking for anything serious". Some of them took it at face value. Some of them got all sultry and declared their skills would change his mind. And some of them somehow forgot the warning entirely. Sheila was one of the latter. But never before had it gone from drinks, to sex, to Get The Fuck Out in less than 12 hours. And he still couldn't contemplate what the hell she was mad about.

"What are you doing tomorrow night?" Her voice got all sweet and pretty when she asked.

"Oh, I gotta catch up on my laundry." That was true, but the bigger truth was that he needed a good night's sleep. There was a rumor of the Imperials advancing on Yavin 4, but he wasn't going to tell her that.

The woman iced over. "Who are you taking?"

"Taking? To the laundry?"

She slapped his knee. "The Minister of State Reception, moron."

With his head still on the pillow, his eyes looked around the foreign bedroom for a clue. "What gave you the idea that I'm going to the Minister of State Reception?"

She hopped out of bed and rushed to get dressed. "You're a war hero. I know you got invited," she hissed. "Skywalker got invited."

Wedge blinked hard. It was too early for this crap. He rubbed his face with both slow palms. "What the hell are you talking about?"

She threw a shoe at him. The argument continued a minute longer, but it only deteriorated to the point of her threatening bodily harm if she saw him in the Newsnet reports at the reception, with or without a date.

And now Wedge was climbing into his cold speeder in the predawn trying to figure out why he didn't really care. At least he'd be able to catch up on his laundry on Zhellday night.

The sex wasn't even worth the complication anymore. Joining the rebellion as a teenager with hundreds of others, they all suffered a strong dose of immortality back then. All the fresh meat in flight school acted like they would live forever, that the statistics were bullshit. One in five rebel pilots got blown to bits in every altercation with the Empire, yet every pilot declared he or she would be The One to live. Wedge was no different. It didn't sink in until the first time he read The List after a battle that he began to feel the weight of truth.

No one ever talked about it, of course. Yet over poker, at parties, drinking beer in the barracks, he could tell which ones still believed they'd live through this war and which ones had accepted the modus operandi of, "Live it up now because you're going to die soon." With his parents gone and his sister long since missing, Wedge didn't have anything on Corellia to go back _to_ , so he gladly fell into those ranks. "Better to burn out than fade away."

It wasn't until that moment he got shot in his upper starboard engine, destroying his ability to keep the ship steady in that tight space, screaming along that trench so fast that every twitch of his wrist could send him crashing into the side of the Death Star, with that green bishwag farm boy and his stupid womprat story holding it steady in front of him, and more TIEs closing in on their tails from behind. . . .

It wasn't until that moment that Wedge realized he wanted to _live_.

Reading The List from that day, when the statistics went from One in Five to One in Twelve, Wedge drank himself into a stupor trying to drown out the niggling feeling that leaving his wingman meant he no longer had the _right_ to live.

That's when he slowly settled into the third stage. 'Better to burn out than fade away, sure, but I'm not taking anybody with me when I go.' He'd seen the crying widows. He'd witnessed those who were going to fly 'one last mission' before they went home. The ones full of piss and vinegar as they climbed into a cockpit that would never come back.

"I'm not looking for anything serious," got amended to add, "but that's more for your benefit than for mine."

Having something warm and sweet to distract him every once in a while seemed to soothe the loneliness of it all, but Wedge drove back to the barracks in the pre-dawn that day and found his eyes stretching toward the empty grinder to snag a sight of Luke and Kess running. They weren't there, of course. She was busted up from the Battle of the Y-Wing and he absconded with her on some Jedi thing. Wedge wasn't the only one that hoped they'd just fuck already and it out of their systems. But he dwelled on all those days he returned to the barracks at dawn with freshly fucked hair and spotted Luke doing his morning run alone... alone... alone... That boy was always alone! Wedge thought all those mornings when he rolled his eyes with sympathy at Luke for keeping to himself and not partaking in the pilot bounty that was prevalent on rebel bases.

Now his eyes stretched to the empty grinder to recognize that, even without the sex, Luke was no longer alone.

And even with more than enough of it... Wedge _wa_ s.

Wedge parked his speeder and stared out that steamy jungle for a moment before getting out. And he found a fourth stage he was only now realizing was an option: cheap sex was no longer worth it.

Thankfully, work distracted him from further lamenting on that topic. When Luke was gone, he was in charge, and that kept him busy enough by itself, especially with new whispers that the Empire was on the way. Wedge put the plan into action to get the birds as ready as they could get them. If Kess returned from their little vacation and got in a twist for him stepping on her Ground Plan toes, Wedge had no problems telling her to kiss his ass. He already planned what he'd say. "If you wanted to stay in charge of the ground plan, you shouldn't've left in the first place." And she'd stick her tongue out at him or something, and he'd come back with something that Luke couldn't hear. "Don't offer unless you're going to follow it through, grease monkey."

All shipmate teasing aside, he knew he had enough tenure to maintain that decision after she got back. Not because of his medal, though that probably helped, but because he was nearly thirty now. Thirty! Compared to the statistical life span of a rebel pilot, Wedge was an antique.

For the first time since he defected for the Rebellion, Wedge began to wonder if he might actually live through this thing. He wasn't stupid enough to try to put any 'retirement' plan into action before the war was over, but he decided it was okay to start daydreaming what that plan might be.

The next day, as if on cue, a call came from the Admiral's office. Wedge reported into the Council Building and gladly stood in front of Admiral Ackbar to receive the orders in Rogue Commander's continued Jedi absence, only to learn that the Jedi had already returned . . . and resigned his commission.

Wedge was hardly surprised, and a little glad of it. Not because he yearned for command so much-although that would be nice-but because it was a pain in the ass to run Rogue Group as a second and have to do it so frequently for so long every time Luke had to run off somewhere. His first reaction was relief and eagerness. He would finally have the formal power to get stuff done. His second reaction was a mild lament because he did enjoy the shit out flying that man's wing. But his third reaction, the one brought on by the momentary wonder why Luke resigned _now_ , was the one that made him chuckle dirty. _Man, that grease monkey must be really good in bed._

 _Not surprising. Most of them are._

Amused, with new landscapes on his horizon, and now the official Rogue Group Commander himself, Wedge took his new orders and reported into the CIC Bunker to get all the datawork transferred over too.

He'd been down here on the rare occasion to know his way around, but not who everyone was. He first checked in with a protocol droid as to his purpose here, and the droid motioned him to pick any of the Red Level data admins to transfer the command codes. Low ceilinged and dark so the admins could have an easier time reading all the screens, mainframes along every wall, glass stat boards cutting the open space with more data to track... dozens of people worked to sort out data into real information they could use. Wedge first looked for one that didn't look busy, but on his way to that one, his feet somehow kept on walking to another, one that looked _super_ busy. . .

She had six screens lit up on the main frame in front of her. Her hands and eyes were moving so fast he could barely tell which screen she was working on. A pale brown ponytail bounced across her back when she turned her head to this or that. And Wedge stopped his feet short before he got to her _. You just swore you wouldn't do this anymore._

But she turned-before he could step away to someone safer-she turned. Green-gray eyes looked him up and down and she pulled the headset off her ear. "What do you need, Commander?"

Wedge stepped up and handed her his orders. "Skywalker resigned and I need to transfer his command codes."

Delicate fingers took the card from him, and a fresh smile shined briefly up. "Congratulations on your promotion. Pull up a chair."

Those shiny eyes were already back on her six screens by the time he rolled over the nearest stool to sit by her station.

"One L or two?" Was her first question to him.

Wedge's brain snagged, but he wasn't sure if it was because of the pretty face looking at him or the fact that she was already three steps ahead of him on this project. "What?"

"Your name," she chuckled softly as she plugged in his orders, "Is it spelled with one L or two?"

"Oh. Two." His eyes went to the screens to watch the orders pop up. She knew his name before she looked at them. And now he wished he sat on the other side of her so he could catch a glimpse of her nametag too.

He scolded himself again _, you just swore you wouldn't do this shit anymore. Focus, bishwag!_

Within a few minutes, Wedge realized he'd seen her before. She was that one he saw avoiding the transport escape during the Battle of Hoth. He remembered seeing her on rare occasion at big events, but only amidst a group of other women. He assumed that meant she was married. Probably had kids already too. (With a stomach that flat, it would have been impressive if she had.)

Still, as pretty and polite as she was, she was all business. "Okay." She swiveled her desk chair to face him and laid out one datacard on top of the other until he had a whole stack. "Your billet assignments. Personnel records of your crew. Base security codes. Fighter security codes. Contact list for your division. Minutes from the last GC meeting. Watch-standing requirements. And... rotation schedule for the maze."

Wedge blinked wide eyes at the stack.

"Any questions?" she asked kindly.

"Um, yeah." He scooted his chair closer to the counter with his little stack. "How do I get billets filled?"

It was the first of many, many questions. Everyone else was rushing to get ready for the Minister of State reception tonight, Teak was already on it to get the birds prepped for a sudden dance, Luke was probably hiding to meditate away some after-sex shock, and Wedge was suddenly no longer in a hurry to get his laundry done.

She operated that six screened terminal like she was flying a fighter. She had the patience of a saint for all his questions, even the really stupid ones he didn't need to ask. She had a deep and wise giggle for his jokes, and those green-gray eyes sparkled at him as though she realized full well he was flirting with her, but she wasn't going to let that get under her skin. She'd dealt with men like him before, and she wasn't falling for it again. Wedge could tell that much just by the way she looked at him, or -to be more accurate- _didn't_ look at him when she found herself reluctantly laughing at something he said.

Wedge thought he detected her blushing at one point, and that's when he would usually go in for the kill. That was the moment to find some sexy way to ask her out, but he stopped himself this time. This time, he reminded himself that 'the kill' was not what he wanted anymore.

And her eyes slid back over as though she expected him to throw out some smooth pick-up line, but she was well armed with plenty of polite ways to say 'no but thanks for asking'.

Wedge realized then that he had no more stupid questions he could think to ask and began collecting his datacards so he could go.

She gestured lightly, "You've been serving as the missing man's second for so long, I'm surprised you didn't know all this stuff already."

Suddenly suffering an overwhelming need to be a gentleman, Wedge decided this one was too good for any of his 'I'm not looking for anything serious' fodder anyway. Wedge cleared his throat as he pushed to his feet and grinned to admit it, even though he wouldn't look her in the eye as he did. "Oh, I did know most of it already." He gave her an honest grin and prepared to walk away without going for the kill at all. "I just wanted an excuse to talk to you some more."

Her sparkling eyes and new grin caught him like a hook to a fish. "So did you have any more questions?"

Was she inviting him to stay and talk longer? . . . Probably not.

But still...

"Just one," his flirtatious smile got away from him, and his instinct tried to take over. "What's your name?"

"Yana."

Not 'Lieutenant'. Not 'none of your business'. Not 'get out of my office'. Not 'I know what you're up to and my answer is still no'.

And yet not another 'spend a lot of money on me and I'll make it worth your while'. Not another 'I'll hang out with you until the day you give me Luke Skywalker's comm number'. Not another 'I know you said you weren't looking for anything serious but I still want you to take me to the Minister of State Reception like were engaged.' Not another 'take me flying and I'll give you a blow job'.

Just...

"Yana," he echoed gently.

He enjoyed the glow of her eyes and the amused smile on her lips, and he listened to the flow and melody of the name as it tumbled out of his mouth. Wedge smiled more, and turned to leave, "Thanks for all the help."

Moments later, as Wedge rode up the lift alone, he stared at a blank spot on the wall. The antique pilot and now official GC of Rogue Group decided his 'retirement' plan was to someday deserve the long-term company of someone like _her_.


	20. LL6 19 Nik's Recovery

Luke and Kess awoke to the sound of Nik retching in a lavatory. Kess rushed to get up, but Luke stopped her with a gentle hand. His eyes were at the air, his senses stretched to the other room. Half sitting up, Kess paused and tried to clear her mind with sleep and worry.

"He's embarrassed," Luke whispered. "You sense it?"

She didn't think to sense out for Nik's mood before she jumped to go take care of him. Now that she paid attention, she could sense it. Nik's soul was bruised purple with shame. This painful experience of an alcoholic aftermath, of his being in this foreign place he didn't like, of being ousted by his wife and son, of needing daycare by his little sister... this violently painful moment was a punishment Nik felt he deserved.

It took some time, but they waited and listened with wrinkled brows of sympathy until the man recovered and went back to bed, but now Kess sat up in theirs too shaken to go back to sleep. It was almost morning anyway. "He needs a bacta tank."

Luke set his arm back under the pillow. "Yes, but It might be better if we keep him out of the public. The longer the press doesn't find out he's back, the easier his recovery will be."

Kess considered that.

"Give him the option," Luke recommended. "I can handle the Kilrathi arguments today. Take the hopper and take him to Iktri for a few hours. Get him some peace quiet."

Her eyes widened with hope, "That's a good idea."

Luke rolled onto his back and grinned a little. "That's what we got the place for. _And_ here. Let him get comfortable in a personal space." He sat up and rubbed the sleep from his face.

"You sure you don't need me today?" She cringed gently.

"Nah, I got it. Besides, we're going to have to get used to tag-teaming this stuff soon enough, in the office and out of it." He pulled his feet out of bed and hopped onto them. "I have a feeling a whole lot more pre-training days are coming up."

As he moved to the bathroom, he caught her uncertain eyes. She wanted to spend time taking care of her brother, but she didn't want to duck out of her responsibilities either. Luke grinned, "Go hang out with your brother for a day. It'll do you both some good."

Kess did convince Nik to go to a clinic for a bacta dunk. She used her fame to arrange a droid-operated taxi and a private back-entrance access to the public outlet so no one would see him. She also shrouded him in Luke's old black robe and cowl just in case someone spotted him through the speeder window. Nik didn't like it. He said it made him feel like he was trying to be the Emperor again, but Kess won the argument that if anyone knew he was back on Coruscant, a whole bunch of people would come out of the woodwork and try to make him become the Emperor again.

By 1000, they were in the hopper and off to Iktri. For the two hour jump, she didn't try to get him to talk, but he did anyway.

"It's not that I can't stop," he said. "I don't sit there and fight myself whether I should have another. It just seems easier to procrastinating facing the real world, y'know?"

Kess vaguely understood. She never had a drinking problem, but she used to have other, milder, not-physically-addictive habits that she, once upon a time, over-used just so she didn't have to face the truth.

"How did you do it?" He asked with genuine curiosity.

"How did I do what?"

"Get through training? How did you turn into _this_? You're so together now. So grown up. It's like you're ten years older than you were a year ago."

Kess thought on that for a long minute and didn't really plan her words before they came out of her mouth. "I guess I realized my standard method living wasn't going to help me get what I really wanted. Sure, I liked partying and blowing up when a repair didn't go the way it should've. All that was easier than facing the truth that I didn't have anybody for my own, or facing the truth that the repair didn't go right because it was me that fucked up something somewhere."

Nik grinned with wistful sympathy. He stared at the streaking of hyperspace.

"At first I tried to do it all," Kess admitted. "Tried to pick up the good habits without dropping the bad ones. I guess I was still trying to keep them in reserve so I could use them for comfort or something. But I realized - not consciously mind you, I can only see it now that I'm looking back on it - I realized there wasn't enough room for it all. And I would get scared. I was walking away from an old trick that I _knew_ would work and started this new habit that hardly worked at all. Seemed like a waste of time. Like I wasn't really accomplishing anything. " Now she too stared at hyperspace and into memory. "So I'd meditate and then go out with my friends afterwards, and I'd end up staying out later than I would have otherwise, later than I should've, just because it felt like it was helping me prepare for the next day. But it wasn't. It was having the opposite effect. Eventually, I started burning out on it all, and I'd meditate like I was supposed to, and stay home because I was just too damn exhausted to do anything else, and that's when it started to work. Not _a lot_. Not _well_. But it started to work. So instead of rushing to go out, I'd just meditate a few minutes longer before I went to bed. And the more I did it, the better I got at it, and the better it worked. But then," she flashed a smile at her memory, "I still wouldn't quit the bad habit. I wanted to keep it handy, like for emergencies or something. I didn't want to let it go."

"So what'd you do?"

"I guess, eventually, I realized I _had_ to get better at it. I couldn't _do_ both. I didn't have enough time to get any real benefits out of either. And I hadn't seen it for myself yet that meditating worked. All I knew was that everyone else _told_ me it worked, science and theology . . . and Luke . . . they all insisted this other habit was better. And I didn't believe 'em. All I knew is that the first habit had a dead end. I knew that because I saw it with my own eyes." She sighed and brightened a little. "So I decided to turn it around. Give it some real effort. I decided that being scared meant I was doing something right. Because being scared means you're doing something _different_. It means you're changing something. And you can't get better at anything if you're not changing it up."

Nik absorbed that for several minutes, and then he closed his eyes to enjoy the quiet of hyperspace.

"I also had Luke," she murmured finally. "I mean, yeah, I was in love with him the whole time, but we never did anything about it. And any time I had a shaky moment when the new habit wasn't working well enough and I fought from falling back into the old ones . . . y'know that time when you feel like your straddling a canyon and the mountains you're standing on are slowly moving your feet apart in both directions? Those times. You want to jump backward because it feels safer, and you know you don't have the skill to jump forward, and you don't have any proof that you will ever have that skill. All you can do is stand there and cringe, scared out of your wits you're just going to fall right down into nothing. . . ." she rubbed her lips. "And he'd stop being a Jedi Master for a minute, he'd stop being my Commander, for just a minute, and he'd catch me." Her voice fell to a distant whisper. "Every damn time."

Nik grinned over, having no interest in interrupting her deep reverie, and just watched her stare out at hyperspace.

"Y'know the weirdest part? And I'm only seeing it now that I'm looking back on it. . . . but to put it terms of that 'straddling a canyon' metaphor: Luke caught me every time, but he didn't throw me forward, and he didn't throw me back. All he did was keep me from falling into the canyon, hold me steady until I wasn't shaky anymore, and then he'd let go so I could try again."

Kess didn't say anything else after that. Nik's eyes were back on hyperspace and he too was mentally laying over his own history onto that 'straddling a canyon' metaphor. She noticed his lips parted and eyes open at this. She sensed out to be sure of it. Nik was finally looking at his life, past and possible future, just as it _was_. No judgment. No regret. No hope. Just the truth.

Quietly, she went to the back of the ship for the rest of the flight. It was its own kind of meditation, she knew, looking at the macro landscape of one's life, habits, youth, family, work, friends, horrors, happiness . . . all compared to the unrealistic dreams you once had when you were a kid. Only looking at this macro landscape of one's own life, without judgment or regret, could you see the different patterns: the things you did that held you back, and the things you need to change before you could move forward.

* * *

It was another gorgeous green day on Iktri. Kess made a mental note how much easier it was to land a slow, clumsy, used RV than a fast ass-on-fire A Wing, and she considered a new are where she could step out of her own comfort zone.

Nik already seemed to be doing better when they landed in the field. When he stepped down the ramp to look at the grass and trees and distant mountains, the man looked like he was getting a booster shot of vitamins.

"Where is everything?"

"We still have to build it."

They had both been on the occasional weekend trip to wetter planets, but Nik had never seen such a great space of raw, lush nature before. He looked a little intimidated by it when he stepped respectfully out and looked around.

"Holy shit," he smiled up at the sky, then pointed like a little kid. "Birds!"

Kess waved him off. "Go walk around some. I got a warning light on the dash and I want to check it out. " She was lying, but he couldn't detect that yet. Still, she returned to the cockpit and ran a diagnostic program just to look busy. Nik saw her disappear back into the ship and blinked a tiny spike of fear that she was leaving him alone in all these...plants. He worried about which flowers were poisonous, if the rustling of field creatures were the kind that attacked, and stepped carefully and slowly, trying not to crush the grass as he moved.

Curiosity drew him to the closest tree line where he stared up at a towering pine; whispering quietly in the wind and waggling its fingers as if saying hello.

"Well, you're a big fella, aren't ya?" It felt like the tree was a wise elder. Nik found himself stepping forward and placing a gentle palm on the soft, reddish bark.

Kess eventually peeked out a porthole to see what he was doing and found him mind-melding with the tree. She smiled at the memory. _"If you could manipulate the Force any way you wanted, what would you do?"_

 _"I'd hear what the ocean had to say."_

She smiled and returned to the interior of the ship, muttering to herself. "By all means, Nik, listen."

She spent her time reading the old operator's manuals to the hopper and began to think of ways she could customize it better to their needs. Nik came bounding back into the ship on a full run. "Kess! Kess!"

She hardly had the chance to sit up with alarm before he burst into the main compartment. His brown eyes were bright like twin suns, his face was the smile of a child, and he pointed back behind him with amazed glee. "There's a _water_ ocean out there!"

* * *

"He was like a little kid at a playground," Kess reported to Luke that night as she pulled off her boots.

And Luke grinned to hear it. Nik clearly still had stress and struggles to work through, but his mood was significantly better than it was when he arrived, and vastly better than that raucous week after the battle.

"That is the really nice thing about Iktri," Kess murmured thoughtfully. "It has such a replenishing effect on people."

His eyes hung on nothing as he unbuttoned his shirt by the bed.

She looked over her shoulder at him. "Maybe we should get Leia out there some time. Make _her_ take a Benduday off."

His brows lifted and his chin nodded. "That's not a bad idea."

Kess continued to report the events of her day to him:

She and Nik commed Leia together that their father had been informed of the engagement-no, it did _not_ go well-but the Lord Chamberlain was clear to do her press release. Leia said she would use it to their advantage in that the release would include the news of Nik's return as, "just here for the wedding and its preparation. Not here to engage in politics at all."

Nik strongly approved of that. He was even more relieved when Leia gave him a contact in her office in case anyone approached him about anything political. This way, he could pass either pass the contact info and not get involved, or pass the info along to the contact and the Lord Chamberlain's office would handle it from there. Either way, Nik could stay out of it.

The contact? Yana Dietrich. Kess asked, "You're not giving this to her just because she's my old roommate and First Lady, are you?"

"No," Leia said shortly. "I'm giving it your old roommate and First Lady because she is the most experienced in Jedi matters out of everyone in my office." And that was the end of that. "Except me." She added with a shrug of her head. Then the woman turned the topic to more sensitive matters. "Nik, I don't want to pry, but what would you like me to put in the press release about why Gina and Ben aren't here with you?"

Nik stiffened to the question. Kess and Leia gave him all the time he needed, but it didn't take long for him to shrug and shake his head. "I guess, say... they're staying home to provide stability for Ben."

Leia nodded distantly. "Anything I can do to help?"

"You're already doing it," Nik muttered appreciatively.

Leia smiled warmly through the comm screen. "Well, you're about to be family." She admitted with a sad shrug, "and we don't have a lot of that left."

Kess shared this story with Luke that night to illustrate her suspicion, "She's lonely out there."

Luke nodded as he continued to get ready for bed, worried, and vowed to start working on a plan to take care of the rest of his family too.

"There's something else that was weird," Kess said. "On Iktri. He was thrilled to see the water ocean, but he wouldn't go near it. I tried to get him to hike down to the beach with me, but he flat refused. It was like... it was like he was looking at the water as though it was the alcohol he's trying to quit. As if the ocean itself was the enemy. And all the giddiness and peace he'd developed so quickly just seemed to dribble right down the drain again."

"War fatigue." Luke sighed as he slumped down onto the bed. "PTSD. Battle shock. Whatever you want to call it. After what they put him through, I'd be surprised if he didn't suffer from it."

She rolled onto her side and propped her head in her palm. "How do you cure it?"

 _Biggs was panicking, "I can't shake him! I can't shake him!"_

Luke rubbed his eye with the flat of his fingers and heard it as clearly as if he were wearing the helmet right now. "When I figure that out," he looked over at her, "I'll let you know."

Kess absorbed that with a faint nod. She absorbed the sudden tremor in his mood and the look in his eyes. And she knew exactly how he felt.

 _Cheenan was smug, "Congratulations, Kess. You're going to be a mother."_

"Yeah," Kess pressed an uncomfortable mouth and nodded again. "Please do."


	21. LL6 20 Legal Guardianship

Kess struggled to draft this proposal because the final decision wasn't a meeting of the minds, nor was it a mediation for both sides to compromise to a middle. The answer was a flat-out "no", but Kess fretted how to word a convincing argument why the Ewoks should be left alone for full and unmolested use of their moon without the scientific back-up to prove they were sentient and civilized enough to hold legal galactic ownership of Endor. The registration listed them as Nature's Tenants, which by itself was correct, but they -

 _"Tayla is in trouble."_

Kess heard the voice as clearly as if it were in her own ears, but there was no one in her office to say it. She looked over her shoulder and found no one standing there. She reached out with her Force senses, but nothing felt out of the ordinary.

Curious, she got out of her desk chair and stepped through the open door to the office common. Raol was finishing up a comm call, but his voice was different, too distant and quiet to have the volume and clarity as though someone were standing right behind Kess's chair. The voice she heard was a man, perhaps elderly, with an Inner Rim accent much like her grandfather's, but she knew it wasn't him. She would have recognized his voice if it was Obi Wan Kenobi.

Raol finished his comm call and gave her his attention for orders. Clearly-and not surprisingly-the office manager hadn't heard the voice.

Kess closed her eyes and reached out, speaking in voice and on the Force simultaneously. "Where is she?"

Paused and quiet to pay attention, she only felt the usual buzz of the population at work in the surrounding offices, and the loud hum of life on the over-populated planet beneath her feet. Yet she focus enough to listen if any of those emotions were trying to send a message specifically to her.

All was quiet.

Luke emerged from the conference room door and was still gesturing his guests to be quiet for a moment. He eyed her across the common and recognized something out of place. He paid attention.

Kess whispered at him. "Did you hear that?"

"I heard _you_ ," he noted. "What's going on?"

"I heard a voice say Tayla's in trouble."

Luke closed his eyes and reached out too.

Kess lifted an index finger for both men to wait and be quiet, then spoke soft and loud through the Force again. "Where is Tayla?"

Her voice rippled out in a dozen musical notes like tiny distorted waves on water. It echoed and faded into the background noise in the distance. She listened hard, sensed out, and waited for an answer, but her mind was already listing the best places to go look: the whore house, the school, Rikatin Street Market...

The silence stretched longer than Kess had the patience for. Perhaps that first message was the only clue she needed anyway. She and Luke exchanged a glance, but . . . nothing. He shook his head too.

Kess turned and reached for-

 _"403 Civil Precinct."_

The voice faded in and faded away again. Kess stopped short and looked to Luke to see if he heard it too. He lifted his brows and shook his head, but then he flicked his chin, _go_.

Kess grabbed her rebel jacket off a chair and moved her feet to the exit as she put it on. She was already trotting through the door when she heard the voice a third time.

 _"You only have a few hours."_

* * *

Walking into the 403rd Senate District Civil Police Precinct gave Kess some pause. The officers weren't stormtroopers exactly, but the white armor and black body suit were close enough to make her uncomfortable. There must have been thirty or forty of them in the big room, scattered about the many workstations, comm terminals, and coffee mess. Kess cleared her throat to approach the front desk and quietly reported in. "Jedi Lendra. I understand you may be holding a Tayla Jeeling."

Some helmets turned at her entry, others turned to hear her name. As she waited, Kess tried not to stare back and ended up falling into an accidental parade rest. Her senses alerted her that most of the people in this room felt she was a criminal, but she held onto the senses that a few of those people felt she still did a good thing by facilitating the cease fire.

Commandant Halidan came out in the same stormtroopers-looking armor but with blue stripes of rank on the white armor shoulders. "Jedi Lendra?"

She nodded and brought her feet together. "I understand you may be holding a Tayla Jeeling?"

"Who called you?" His tone was accusatory.

"That's um..." she glanced around to all the onlookers, all the occupants of the room. No Tayla. Finally, she admitted to the Commandant. "That's complicated. Do you have her?"

He considered this a moment, looked at the floor, then back at her, then motioned her to come along. Once in a back office, he didn't offer her a seat and didn't sit down himself. Instead he faced her down. "We have her. She wouldn't tell us her last name and her DNA didn't match anything on file, so we couldn't bring up a record of her legal guardianship. She's been asking for us to contact _you_ , but since it was easy to confirm you don't retain legal guardianship of anyone, we didn't believe her. As a minor, we can only hold her for five days before we have to transfer her to a secured juvenile facility, in which case even a legal guardian must retain a special release order for permission to keep the child at home to wait for the trial."

"And without it?"

"Most minors without prompt legal guardianship wait for their trials in Juvenile Detention. By law, we have to transfer her SJF by 1700 today if legal guardianship doesn't come to take her. We hoped the clock on the wall break Tayla's stubbornness enough to give us some identifying information."

"What's she in for?"

"Soliciting without a license."

A reluctant chuckle blurted out of Kess's mouth.

"She approached a Senator on the Avenue of Core Founders and he reported her into a Purple Guard."

Trying not to laugh and growl frustration at the same time, Kess rubbed her eyes with thumb and forefinger. The Commandant gave her this brief moment to react to this news, but Kess recognized time was of the essence, and she had no idea how long it took to process a release. "So what do I need to do to get her out of here before 1700?"

"You've already done it. Her last name is Jeeling?"

"Woah. Yes. But wait a minute."

"No." He shook his head and began to leave the room. "I can't wait a minute. If we can't find and get her LG here in the next three hours, we _have_ to transfer her."

Kess spread her hands. "Can't _I_ take her?"

"No." The white face/black eye helmet shook his head at her. "You don't have any legal rights here."

Kess blinked back, then tried again. "Can I _talk_ to her?"

The helmet turned as he considered this a moment, then looked back at her. "First tell me how you found out she was here."

She flattened her mouth but shrugged the truth. "I sensed it on the Force. Tayla's my Jedi Apprentice. That's why she wanted you to comm me instead of her mother."

He shifted his feet back to her and angled his head. "So why didn't you sense it five days ago?"

In order to not have to go into explanations this guy would never understand, Kess came up with a quick and convincing lie, "Because she's just getting started in her Jedi training. She's not very good at this stuff yet. And good thing too if she's starting to act out like this."

His feet shifted.

"The girl needs discipline. She's not going to get that from her mother. And she'll get _too_ much of it in SJF."

"I don't have the legal right to turn her over to you."

"But you do have the power to let me talk to her. Five minutes. Supervised if you want. That's all I'm asking."

Finally, the Commandant nodded and led her to a gated hall in the back. She followed through a security gate, down another hall and through another security gate. . . . then a third gate, each time with a Police Trooper standing by to unlock, hold the door, and lock it again behind them. Kess wasn't sure she knew how these electronic locks worked. She made mental not that it would take a minute to use the Force on each one, should the need of illegal escape arise.

Yet, she had to play by the rules on this one. Busting Tayla out of jail was not an option. Illegal escape would only be the case if they illegally attacked Kess too. Most of these guys recognized her and didn't like her. And Kess realized she was wearing her rebel jacket into this place. She accepted it that getting five minutes supervised talk with Tayla was the one and only favor she was going to get.

Gray walls, gray bars, gray floors. Harsh white lighting reflected off the white armor of Police Troopers at every turn. Not even a Star Destroyer made Kess feel this apprehensive, she could only imagine what it must be doing to Tayla's demeanor.

In a cell within a long row of other similarly-packed cells, Tayla huddled cold and scared in the far corner. Rough-looking teenagers, mostly non-humans of one sentient race or another, hung out on the floors and benches waiting the extended hours just as Tayla was. Five days? There weren't enough benches for all these kids to sit down at the same time; where did they sleep at night?

With the Commandant standing against the wall behind Kess, and two other troopers in sight, Kess stood outside the bars and met eyes with the shamed girl in the corner. Tayla wore hardly more than a green corset. Makeup streaked down her dark face like ink. Her shoes were long gone, and shehad ripped the small holes of her fishnet stockings into bigger holes so her little feet could fit through. Now her stockings stopped at the ankles, and her dirty bare feet curled over one another on the concrete floor.

Kess motioned her over.

Tayla sniffed and crawled slowly to her feet. Stepping over other kids - one tried to kick her - she came to the bars and wrapped her dirty hands around the dirty metal. "You didn't tell them who I was, did you?"

Kess pressed her mouth. "I didn't know we were keeping it a secret."

Tayla's green eyes pleaded with new tears, "Please don't tell her. Please take me home with you. Don't let them take me back there. Please? Please!"

"Tayla, I'm not your legal guardian. I don't have the right to take you home with me."

"But you're a Jedi. Can't you -like- outrank that or something?" Her voice lowered to a secret murmur. "Can you bust me out of here tonight maybe?"

Kess sighed heavy and shook her head, but she didn't have time for that kind of Q and A. "Why don't you want to go home?"

"Lots of reasons!"

Kess lost her patience, but maybe firmness was what the girl needed. Kess set her weight on one foot crossed her arms. "You better start talking or I _am_ going to leave you here."

Tayla considered this hard. Her eyes went to the Commandant standing behind Kess and lowered her voice even further. "I don't wanna . . . do . . . what my mom does."

Kess sobered fast. "Why do you feel the need to specify this?"

Tayla licked her lower lip to try to figure out how to put it. "Saffron won't. She don't make deals for us kids. But mom can outrank her. Mom can make a deal outside the house, and then all the money go to her."

"I can't believe your mom would be considering this."

"She don't know yet. Dude ain't asked her yet. But I know he's gonna." Her face and voice suddenly looked a dozen years older, "Kess, I know he's gonna."

"But your mom still has to say 'yes'." Kess struggled to understand this. The kid was eleven!

"She won't at first. But if ask right after she run outta spice _and_ run outta money . . . . she ain't gonna say no."

"Has she ever made you do this before?"

"No, but nobody asked her before! I ain't a kid no more! The guests been seeing me different, and-"

Tayla's momentary strength was crumbling to an elongated panic again, so Kess interrupted her with a gesture. "Alright. Alright. You're going to have to hang out here a little longer. I'm going to have to think of something creative."

"You gonna bust me out?" Tayla asked eagerly. "You gonna take me home with you?"

Kess considered that, but shook her head, and met Tayla's eye as she turned away. "Be careful what you wish for."

She motioned to the Commandant and followed him back out the three security gates and into the main office. She took a few minutes to understand the full range of legal hurdles here, thanked the Commandant for his help, and left the police station _without_ her apprentice in tow.

As she flew the speeder through traffic and down into the red light district where Saffron's whore-house resided, Kess considered if she should update Luke on the situation now or later. She had a feeling the decision was going to have to be made on the fly and, out of respect, shouldn't make this change without getting his opinion on it.

Yet she already kind of knew what his answer would be.

Somehow, she didn't want him involved in this. Tayla was her apprentice and Kess needed to deal with this one on her own. She used the speeders text link to send him a message that all was well, but she'd need the speeder for the rest of the night and he'd need to find his own ride home.

"One of these days we're probably going to need two speeders," she muttered as she set it down in a filthy parking space on the side of a dirty road.

The whore house was just ramping up for a normal weeknight of regular business and several of the ladies greeted Kess with a hello, but they had another question too. "Have you seen Tayla?"

"She's safe. I need to speak with Olean."

Anacap freaked out. "Where is she? She's been gone for a week! Saffron's is worried sick!"

Kess swallowed tension to hear that. Saffron was worried? But Tayla's mother wasn't? She cleared her throat. "I need to speak with Olean now."

Soon, Saffron came out to meet her in the foyer.

"I need to speak with Olean," Kess insisted.

Saffron looked reluctant. "Olean's with a customer. Can it wait?"

"Not long." Kess warned. "I have three hours to complete a number of tasks after this one, and if I don't make it, Tayla's going to juvie."

Saffron took this in with a sigh and a nod. "Give me a minute. Anacap, can you escort Kess to a private room so they can talk?"

Kess looked around the tiny room as Anacap left her there. Red and purple velvet with sparkling silver tassels and a mirror covering the full ceiling. The bed was one thing, but the chair didn't seem any less used. Kess turned around to face the open doorway and waited on her feet.

"Have you come to save me from my evil ways?" Olean whined as she entered. She sat down on the bed and finished buckling the leather pants back over her thighs and knees.

Kess lifted a brow and a grin, "Do you _want_ to be saved from your evil ways?"

Olean shot her a look and resumed her task. "Where's my daughter?"

"She's in prison."

"Whad she do?"

"She was soliciting Senators in the Avenue of Core Founders."

Olean rolled her eyes and sighed defeat. She gave Kess another hard look and pulled a death stick out of a pack on the table. "Y'know, I was okay with her going to see you about that damn voice in her head, but I thought you were going to make it shut up, not give her more ideas on how to get herself deeper into trouble!"

No longer caring of this woman's opinion, Kess sat down on the chair and set her elbows on her knees to eye the woman with severity. "Olean, I _can't_ make the voice shut up. And neither can she. All I can do is teach when to listen to it and when not to."

"So teach her not to listen to it already! You been hanging with my kid for weeks now!"

"Olean, it's not that simple-

"Fuck 'simple'." She spat. "Before you showed up, Tayla was fine."

"She wasn't fine."

"She was fine!" The death stick hand waved and gestured as she yelled. "She got food and clothes and a bed. And she don't have to work. She can go to school. . . . But not if she keeps getting caught."

"Olean, _you're_ one of the voices she hears! She can sense what goes on here."

"Of course she knows! My kid ain't stupid. But we don't make her _work_."

"She thinks you will sooner or later. That's why she called me instead of you."

The woman's rage hardened. "Then why would she sell it before she has to?"

"Right now, that's not our concern. Right now, we have-" she checked the chrono "two and a half hours to get her out of there or she's going to be in lock up until the trial. . . . and she doesn't want to come back here."

Olean considered this with a smoky drag of her stick and waved her hand, "Whaddya want me to do, huh? Change my career? Y'know how many people in this town are willing to hire an ex-sex worker? I got no other options than working with the droids in the garbage scow."

Kess shook her head at the floor. This was the moment she feared. This was what she should have talked to Luke about before she entered this place. "Olean, I'm not trying to change you. I'm just trying to protect Tayla."

Olean's head drooped from her neck in disbelief. "You want _custody_."

Kess shook her head quickly. "I don't 'want' that, per say, but I can't think of any other options at the moment."

Olean flattened her heavily lipstick-ed mouth.

"You're her mother and legal guardian and I will not get in the way of that," Kess assured. "But right now- Olean, she was willing to risk going to lock up until her trial instead of coming back here."

Olean seemed to sober.

"And when Tayla has to appear in court in front of a judge for soliciting without a license at the age of eleven and insists she doesn't want to come home to a whore house? What do you think they're going to decide to do with her?"

Olean blew smoke out tight lips and hissed it. "Fuck."

Kess let her stew on it a moment, sensing out when the woman truly realized there were no other options, and lowered her voice with stiff respect. "Only with your permission and your blessing, I will take on temporary legal guardianship and she can stay with us for a little while until I can get her trained enough to stay out of legal trouble."

"Fine. Whatever."

She didn't even fight. She argued a bit, but she didn't really fight Kess on this idea. Maybe this was a good thing after all. Kess pushed to her feet and forced herself not to give Olean a piece of her mind. "Get dressed."

"I am dressed,bitch."

Kess barked at her. "Then get more dressed!"

By now Saffron had returned in the hallway. Since they never closed the door, the whole conversation was overheard by the Madam. Kess summarized it again anyway, "Tayla's going to stay with me for a while. I need to pack some clothes for her." Saffron's dark eyes went darker as she turned her feet to lead the way to the kids' room.

Olean rolled her head on her neck and bitched as she pushed to a stand. "And this is going to out me a night's wages too, I'll bet."

It took a lot of Jedi discipline to keep from backhanding Tayla's mother.

* * *

Four hours later, Kess nudged the eleven-year-old scruffy prostitute into her apartment and interrupted Luke and Nik in a meditation lesson on the couches.

Nik rattled his head at the girl. He'd heard of her but he'd never met her before. Luke took one look at Tayla and his brow arched with humor.

Kess shoved Tayla gently to cross the floor between them. "Scrub everything. _Twice_."

Delighted about this change, Tayla strutted between the two men like she was still on the prowl, calling out in sing song success as she went. "Remember, you can't punish me for anything you done yourself."

"Nah, you're right," Kess said back. "I can't punish you for pretending to solicit sex without a license."

The men reacted with silent, if not blushing, smirks of humor.

Kess added, "But pretending to solicit so you could pickpocket a senator?"

Already at the other archway Tayla slowed her feet and glanced back.

Kess met her eyes, "You are _so_ grounded."

Tayla began to spin in protest, but Kess just pointed. "Shower."

Tayla disappeared into the back of the house and Kess collapsed in an armchair in the living room.

It wasn't until Tayla was entirely in the back of the house that Nik allowed himself an open laugh. Luke hid his flushing snicker in his own palm. Nik was humored by the kid. Luke was humored by what the kid was putting her Jedi Master through.

"You better quit laughing, farm boy." Kess warned with a crooked jaw and evil smile. "You haven't heard the best part yet."

Luke's face was red and bright, but he finally met her eyes. "What?"

"You were in a hurry to have kids in the house?" She told him, and watched his laughter quickly sober. "Well, guess what?"


	22. LL6 21 Shopping

The whole tradition of shopping was never something Kess understood. When she went to buy clothes in a new place, she'd spend thirty minutes perusing ads for the different stores to see who had the kind of stuff she liked to wear, and if she found one, never tried any place else until she moved again. It worked on Coruscant too. Now that she had to wear civilian clothes all the time, she spent the standard thirty minutes, found a place within walking distance, and only bought enough to survive a week without needing to do laundry. Most of her clothes now looked like new versions of Mos Eisley city-wear: brown or black pants, bone or tan colored tunics, and undershirts in the occasional army green or camo just for old time's sake.

When she explained this method to sophisticated and book nerd Yana and to the denim and sparkle wearing-eleven year-old tom boy Tayla, the two looked at Kess like she had a bug coming out of her nose. Kess tried to defend her methods on the account of budget, and not just for everyday wear, she also had to dress humbly for the Senate Ball. If the Jedi got too decked out for the press event, criticism of the non-profit spending would ensue. Yana spread her hands and began to speak her complaint out of habit, but when the words didn't come, pulled out the datalink to say. So rent a dress.

Kess blinked at the screen.

Yana snatched it back to type more and shoved it back into Kess's hands. You don't have to *buy* it.

"I didn't know you could do that," Kess said sheepishly.

Yana and Tayla exchanged an eye roll and immediately took command of the situation. They visited three different places. Kess was ready to pick an okay option at the first place and be done with it all. Yana and Tayla insisted they keep looking until they found something perfect, especially since Yana was looking for the perfect dress for herself as well, and Tayla was enjoying her sparkling imagination that she might get a chance to wear this stuff someday. The chore was further frustrated with repeated quizzes to Kess about if she 'liked this one' and 'why or why not' because Yana was also trying to figure out what the wedding style was going to be too.

Tayla was thrilled to assist with all this and became Yana's right-hand-woman to go pick out matching shoes or find the right size of something. Even the stuff that was simpler than everything else seemed too fancy in Kess's opinion, and she kept complaining that the girls were trying to overdo it.

Eventually, they got her in a dress that she looked uncomfortable wearing, but they shoved her in front of a mirror before she began to take it off again.

Kess stopped short. She looked at herself up and down in the reflection and cocked her head. "O- _oh!_ Well..." she put her hand on the flat belly and looked at it sideways. "Well, okay then."

Tayla brought over shoes and put them down for Kess to step into. Yana reached up and began to untangle the fraying braids from her head until dark gold locks fell free. All the while, Kess looked at herself in the mirror, and herself in the dress in the mirror, and tried to 'get to know it'.

Once the long hair fell down her back in waist-long kinks and the pale shoes sparkled from under the floor-length skirt, Kess admitted defeat. "I am so getting laid that night."

Yana and Tayla shared a high-five behind Kess's back, and Yana sat down to take off her own shoes, motioning orders to Tayla. Yana had no problems with sparkles and frills like Kess did, so Tayla was particularly delighted to see this shimmering wad of rhinestone stars on somebody. Yana let her hair down and tossed the head-wrap aside. She stepped into the dress and motioned to Tayla to zip up the back. Now the shoes. Tayla got on her knees to put them on like she was dressing Cinderella. Once fitted in it, Yana stepped confidently to the mirror beside Kess and dropped her wrist to hang on Kess's shoulder like a bad-ass gang.

Kess's eyes widened. Even in this get-up, she looked simple compared to Yana, which was what she wanted, but now grew jealous of her friend's natural color and confident beauty. "Maybe you'll get laid that night too." She said it as a compliment.

Yana eyed herself up and down in the mirror and shook her head. Tayla brought over the datalink for her and stood as a group with the two women. They looked at themselves in the mirror together. Yana typed with her thumbs and shoved it in Kess's shoulder to make her read it. The woman was already walking away again when Kess's eyes danced across the words.

I don't have a date.

Kess spat a loud whine, "He _still_ hasn't commed you!?"

* * *

"What do you mean you still haven't commed her?!" Luke spat in a loud whine.

Wedge rolled his eyes and buttoned up the sharp-starched shirt. "Disengage."

"Are we talking about the redhead?" Nik asked as he grimaced at a senatorial-looking garb. "The one with the brain damage."

"Yes." Luke hissed.

"No." Wedge insisted.

Luke whipped the jacket off and threw it on the bench. "I defended you too. I did everything I could to buy you more time, but it's been almost two months now. You'd be lucky if she still wants a comm."

"She already doesn't, Luke," Wedge turned away and started stripping this stiff piece of garbage.

Luke set his weight on one foot and opened his mouth-

Wedge stopped him with a hard palm and harder eyes. "And don't give me any of your You Can Sense That She Does crap, because I'm not buying it."

Luke snapped his mouth shut and turned to the next overstuffed suit he was supposed to try on.

As the other two stepped away from it, now Nik stepped up to the mirror and cocked his head at what he looked like. "Well, my wife kicked my ass out, so if you're not going to comm her-

" _No_." Wedge barked.

Luke lifted a brow over at Wedge. Wedge just flattened his mouth. Busted. And he turned his back to both men.

Nik sniggered silently and grinned over at Luke, "See? There's more than one way to hit a womp rat."

Luke saw Nik's intent clearly now, and it had nothing to do with comming Yana. He snorted out with fresh laughter.

Wedge stepped up again in a different jacket this time, "If you guys don't get off this topic, as the First Man in charge of your attire at this thing, I'm gonna dress you up in hot pink tights and bright green wigs."

Luke chortled even more at the sight of that. Nik turned his feet to face Wedge. "Oh yeah? That's sounds like a throw down, son."

Wedge shook his head.

Luke stepped back and sat down on the bench, grinning at all this. Even more so that Nik and Wedge were getting along like a house on fire. Nik tried to dare Wedge that he'd wear any wild bullshit Wedge would come up with if that's all it took to hammer the man about being gun shy. Wedge just threw it back at him without hesitation that he was also in charge of the groom's pre-nup party and "there _will_ be photocaps you _won't_ want sent to your wife."

Luke enjoyed this camaraderie immensely. He once grinned in the mirror and thought of Han and Lando with a bittersweet smile. Somehow, it felt those guys were here too, wanting to rub the farm boy's face in all this, scramble his hair, and tease him about sex. He sent out his Force thoughts to assure them their duties were well represented.

"Do we even know what colors we're supposed to be in?" Wedge finally bitched.

From the bench, Luke gestured wearily. "Don't look at me! You know who you need to comm for that data."

Wedge tried to flatten his mouth at Nik to share his impatience. Nik straightened his shoulders in the senatorial looking robes and offered it like he was done with this bullshit conversation. "You want me to comm Kess and ask her?"

Wedge nodded deeply. "Yes. Please."

Luke coughed disbelief at Wedge's back. Without turning from the mirror, Wedge raised a hand to his shoulder and flipped him off.

Nik pulled up his comlink from his real clothes. "Yo, Kay Kay, you guys almost done?"

Her voice filled the men's dressing room. "Yeah, I've had about enough of this for one day."

"You still have your crew with you?"

"Yeah."

Wedge glanced over his shoulder at the other man, his black brows now knitted with distrust.

Nik didn't bat an eye. "Let's all meet up at Tee Dee Q's so we can compare notes."

Wedge turned and glared.

Smugly, Nik stared him down.

Kess's voice came back. "That's an excellent idea. If you get there first, make sure you get a table for six."

"Ten four." _Click._

Luke clopped his palms in laughing success. He pointed at Nik, "That was wizard."

Wedge's jaw rippled from clenching his teeth. His tone came out icy. "Guys, I may have a well-earned reputation of logging my share off-duty mission objectives, but I have never, ever, pushed my presence where it wasn't wanted."

Nik spread his hands at the man. "And you're not. This is wedding party fodder. Don't want to talk to her? Don't talk to her." He turned to the mirror to take one last look before taking this thing off and turn his back on them for the bench. "But if you don't talk to her, I will."

Wedge hitched to respond, but stopped himself. Luke grinned at him and Wedge realized that Nik was only saying those things to get a reaction. He wiped his face with both palms and groaned, "This is going to be a long kriffin' night."


	23. LL6 22 Tee Dee Qs

Rage.

Absolute _rage_.

Wedge's anger flared beyond all control. Face red. Knuckles white. Voice hoarse from growling at the top of his lungs until there was no more breath behind it.

No one heard it. No one saw it. All they knew was that he was hit, but he wasn't dead. He wasn't even damaged enough to need to eject, so his wingman peeled off to dive back into the fight without him. And Rogue Leader was left alone in the mess to stutter and drift.

Wedge gritted his teeth to look out the canopy and watch his lower port engine fizzle to nothing. He never saw the TIE that fired the shot. And R5 was already fried from another shot three long minutes ago. He yanked the stick to ease into some kind of effective position, but the dampers were trying to make up the difference for the dead engine, and the old bird over-compensated with bursts in three directions. It was like trying to fly with a dead rancor on his wing.

With Coruscant a glittering gem of black and gold beneath him, with red and green streaks surrounding him like some kind of disco, with capital ships hanging in the black like giant salt rocks in an asteroid belt, in the most important battle of this decades-long war, Wedge was once again nailed just enough to kick him out of the effort, but not enough to die.

Wedge was so incredibly _pissed_.

He wasn't supposed to live through this one. He couldn't explain how he knew that. He never quite put his finger on the conscious thought of it. But he wasn't supposed to live through this one. For the Battle of Coruscant, this final push to kick the Empire out of the Capital Planet, Wedge expected he would be one of the ones who could leave this war behind. He expected his last moment would be to watch a fatal blow coming to kill him, and he would merely close his eyes with a final prayer that the rest of them would live to be happy in peace. That's how he wanted to go out.

Not like this. Not limping the X-Wing back towards the _Mon Icarus_ like a lame dog. Not to sit on the hangar deck and help the repair crew haul in pilots after the mission completed. Not to write the Regret To Inform You letters to widows and parents and children. Not to stand in some horrid Victory Day ceremony and get a medal that burned a new blister into his chest for every dead pilot that deserved it more.

But maybe, just maybe, his crack grease monkey crew could patch up the engine and send him back out before it was over. Maybe another pilot had landed a good bird that he could take back out. Hell, he'd take a TIE out if he had to. He was pretty good in those, too. Wedge really didn't have any other options but to crawl back to the hangar and figure out how else he could help get this _done_.

Inching around the Mon Calamari cruiser, he could already see they were struggling. The starboard shields flickered, and the well-lit hangar was crawling with the rushing army green jumpsuits. The place was a mess, but a loosely organized one. They had pulled in a Gold Group Y-Wing, charred black over its starboard engine, but the rest of the racing was to pull in ejected pilots from space. Crew stood at the tractor beam controls. Crew shouted into the Ops Channel. Crew lined up with naked gurneys by the small shield porthole. Crew ran full speed shoving filled gurneys with squirming burnt pilots toward the back of the hangar and into the hands of emergency med droids. They would need to bring the shield down so he could land, and he considered not landing simply so they wouldn't have to bring that shield down. In its flickering state, he feared it might not go back up.

He heard Seidrik's rushed voice in his ear. "Rogue Leader, Icarus Hangar. You comin' in?"

"Icarus Hanger, Rogue Leader. Only if your shields are gonna go back up. Can you confirm?"

"Wait one."

Wedge watched out his port eyeball to see Seidrik, still practically a teenager, man-up to demand a status on the health of their shields from the bridge so they could pull in a broken bird. In the three seconds he waited for an answer, he was now close enough to see Ashten's green hair running away with a burnt body on a gurney and Kayla's blond bob flying frantically into her face as she hit the controls with her elbow so her arms remained free to reach out into the momentary vacuum of space and yank a TIE pilot out of danger.

Support crew. They'd all be dead without them. _You guys should get all the medals for this one_ , Wedge thought.

"Rogue Leader, Icarus Hangar, Bring it on in."

Wedge pressed his mouth and tapped the stick to nudge the bird in that direction, and the flickering shield zapped away to welcome him home-

It screamed.

It screamed in that familiar, painful, ear-piercing, twin ion engine scream. It screamed with an I'm-coming-to-take-a-bite-out-of-your-ass, Imperial jackass scream. Even in the soundless dead of space, it screamed. Before he could turn his head to see it coming, the Doppler shift of sound already told Wedge it was screaming _for_ _them_. The TIE was spinning on a kamikaze run toward the hangar, like a needle intent to stab a hole into the side of the capital ship, like a suicide bomber aiming to take out his family.

And they had lowered the shields for _him_.

Wedge's rage exploded in a battle cry the same moment his fist yanked the throttle. He cranked the pitch until he spun too, spiraling his broken ship into the damn thing's way. He saw the flash-pop and a body punch out into space above the TIE only a split second before the black beast T-boned Rogue Three.

The crash knocked him around like a bee-bee in a box car. Wedge let go of the controls, closed his eyes, and just let it happen. He felt closure that his final thought was, indeed, a prayer that all of Rogue crew would live to be happy in peace.

Inside the cockpit, his body tumbled and banged. His helmet cracked the yellowed transparisteel of the canopy. The crunch of metal against metal growled with the power of an evil demon. In the crackling mike, he heard Seidrick's shout get cut off too fast to know what he was yelling. He felt the X-wing hit deck and slide with a nails-on-chalkboard scrape. He heard a woman scream. And he realized he was tumbling to a stop.

Dizzy, bruised, shell-shocked, Wedge began to open his eyes.

 ** _Ka BOOOM!_**

Orange fire flowered from his snapped port wings and rolled over the panel-less, black beatle body of the TIE, still skidding to a stop on the deck beside him. In instinctive self-preservation, Wedge began to blink away from the explosion, but his eyes only widened to watch all the other eyes staring back at death. Oily fire bubbled away from him with the speed of a flash flood, igniting the air in the hangar, and swept over a scattering of grease monkeys still coming out of their duck-and-cover from the crash.

Ashten began to bring her body up from covering the pilot in the gurney just as her green hair burnt black and her skin melted. Seidrik cried out with a red face to warn others just before his body slammed against the bulkhead like he'd been fired from a cannon. Kayla barely turned to see what happened when the explosion blew her out the open porthole like a pea from a straw, right along with gurney and the TIE pilot she had just saved.

"NO!" Wedge screamed. He watched in impotent horror as his entire repair crew slammed against the nearest bulkhead, snapped like twigs over equipment, fried like paper, and swept toward the open bay doors like dried leaves in a strong wind, several tumbled out into space like dead gnats before the shield slammed shut again.

"NO! NO! NO!" He slammed his right arm hard against the side of the cockpit, over and over and over again. He tried to look at his lap, he tried to slam his eyes shut, he tried to think of a way to make the rest of the X wing explode with him still in it, but all he could do was sit there, trapped, helpless, and watch.

The fire burned itself out within in two seconds. Droids piled on people piled on broken fighter parts piled on more dead bodies strapped into gurneys in the fore-corner. He saw the flash of red and green outside that the battle continued to rage on. He felt the _Mon Icarus_ rock from another hard blow. He saw the blast doors slammed shut to contain the blast. The only thing left alive in the hangar was him.

And now he had to wait until the battle was over before they could pry him out of the broken cockpit.

Wedge looked out through that canopy, blinking through blurry vision and tears of rage, his teeth splintering behind his retracted lips, his right arm broken by his own beating, and had all the time in the world to sit there and stare at all their dead bodies.

* * *

They split up. Since Yana drove Kess and Tayla, and Wedge drove Nik and Luke, it made sense for Luke to stop and pick up his own speeder so the Jedi could fly his own family home after the dinner. The guys had tried to engage him in further conversation on the way out, but Wedge wasn't in the mood for it. He was too irritated. They all kept trying to hook up him and Yana like nothing ever happened, like they hadn't all just been through the biggest losses of their lives. Was he really supposed to just pick up the pieces and live happily ever after? Just because he was unfortunate enough not to be on The List? He had no right to that. In all the years from defecting the Imperial Navy to now, Wedge had not accomplished a damn thing that earned him a 'happily ever after'.

Besides, Yana pretty much shut him down anyway. She wasn't an outgoing woman by any means, but she was well-known for her inner strength not to put up with player bullshit. She flirted back on Yavin 4, but she was no longer interested. She made that clear with her cold and concise message about the wedding plans. Disappointed as he was by it, he respected her enough not to press the matter any further. In a way, he respected her more for it, for she was one of the few who didn't act like the whole war should be erased from memory.

Still, she was First Lady and he was First Man, so he was going to have to find a way to interact with her over this damn wedding anyway. He made a point to find a friendly/professional balance so that their interaction didn't feel awkward, which would be a difficult task when she couldn't talk. Somehow he'd manage, he insisted of himself, and flew alone behind Luke and Nik in the other speeder to this Tatooine place they kept raving about. As if Luke sensed his annoyance, the man engaged more than usual to Nik's boisterous and playful antics. It was as if the other two were creating a happy distraction so that Wedge's cold silence wouldn't be noticed. Wedge let them take the front lines on that.

Strolling into that furnace of a restaurant, the three men found the three women already at a large stone table with iced drinks and nibbling on communal flat bread. Wedge's eyes instantly locked on her-he couldn't help it-a blue band tied back the pale brown hair from her porcelain face. Her red lips smiled white teeth at some joke Kess just said, until those green eyes saw him come in behind the rest of the crew. Her smile faded, but her lips remained parted. Her white cheeks flushed with a touch of pink. Her posture straightened, and her shoulders heaved a slow, careful breath of air.

In an attempt to offer a silent peace, Wedge pressed an uneasy grin as he sat down across the big round table from her, expressing as best he could a face of apology for making her uncomfortable. Thankfully, the moment was swept away by the other wild and happy activity.

Four Jawa waiters took care of them. The restaurant owner, whichever one it was, was glad to have this party visit their establishment and worked hard to give them the royal treatment. Tayla whined that she couldn't read the menu. Nik tried to order sulferian meat sticks for his sister. Kess was then forced to explain her allergy that would make her go voiceless for a time. Yana shrugged at Kess that she shouldn't bitch about such a thing. Luke ordered something that made him announce he was going to have to find a gym for them very soon. Apparently, the Jedi hadn't gone running once since they got here. Wedge gave up on trying to understand what the food was and just ordered whatever Luke was having.

"So, how did you guys do?" Luke soon asked the women.

Kess explained they found dresses for the Senate Ball but they weren't shopping for the wedding yet. Yana shook her head and snatched the datalink to type, then tossed it across the table at Luke and reached for the second link out of her bag.

Luke picked it up and read, and Wedge over to read over his shoulder.

I have some ideas now.

"Oh?"

Yana motioned that the datalink go to Tayla, and instructed with fake sign language that Tayla was to read her words for all to hear. Yana typed and Tayla read. "Earth tones. And you're not allowed to wear black."

Wedge scrunched his brows. "Everything we were looking at was black."

"Not me," Nik said. "I'm not wearing black."

Luke eyed over at the woman sitting next to him. "No black, huh?"

Kess wrinkled her nose and shook her head. "You look good in it, don't get me wrong, but we're supposed to be on the light side."

Luke shrugged and hitched a grin, "I'm tempted to just wear our old uniforms."

Kess sat up and yipped. "Yes! Yes." Then, to Yana. "Why can't we just do that?"

Even Wedge blanched at this. "At your own wedding?"

Yana glared her eyes at Kess, but she reached across the table and snapped her fingers until she got Nik's attention.

The former Emperor looked at her like a pup busted for something.

Yana typed. Tayla read. "Comm Leia."

Nik grinned and pulled out his comlink. Tayla shared the view of the link screen so he would get the number to follow the order.

Wedge chortled darkly, "You're both about to get outranked."

"Hello?" Leia's voice blossomed from the tiny mike.

Nik set the comlink towards the middle of the table. "Hiya, sis! It's Nikolai."

"Welcome back," Leia's voice smiled. "How are you?"

"I am great and I am calling on behalf of your lovely assistant and First Lady of the Wedding. Four of us are sitting at this table trying to convince _two_ of us not to wear their stupid uniforms to their own wedding, and we thought you might help us lay down the law."

Leia's voice was firm. "No uniforms! _Good grief!"_

Tayla called out. "Yana says to tell you that Kess doesn't want Luke to wear black."

Kess dropped her ear to Luke's shoulder and grumbled. "Now I know why people complain so much about planning weddings."

Luke shoved a tongue in his molar. "Un huhn."

"I'm okay with that." Leia said through the tiny mike. "Do we have any ideas on what style this thing is going to be?"

They all looked at Kess. She panicked and shrugged violently. "We weren't even looking at wedding stuff today! I thought this was all about the Senate Ball."

Leia's voice peeped up. "Nik, tell me everyone that's there."

Nik complied to list everyone in clockwise order. "Wedge, Luke, Kess, Yana, Tayla, and me."

"Yana?" The single word was enough of an instruction by itself.

Yana set her elbows on the table and typed furiously with her thumbs. As Tayla read it, Wedge's snuck a glance at Yana, and Yana's mouth parted again for another controlled breath.

Tayla read, "Earth tones and off-whites. Tatooine looking stuff. Muslin. Lace. Accents of either colorful flowers or fresh green plants."

Kess peeped, "How did you get all that out of today's shopping?"

Yana angled over a chin and flattened mouth. She was either saying, _Because I know what I'm doing,_ or she was saying, _Because I lived with you for a year and I know you already_. Whatever the actual message, Yana made her point with expression alone.

Leia voice smiled warmly at all this fun, but seemed sober that she was missing it. "Wedge? You there? Can you work with that?"

"Yeah, that helps. I'll just dress his ass up as a tree."

Nik added, "And Kess a can go as a rock."

Three Jawas came around with big trays of food. The comlink discussion quieted while all the plates got passed around and the distraction of who's dish was whose. Tayla poked at her food with an index finger and asked what it was. Yana waved her palm at her face overwhelmed by the heat in here. Nik talked loudly in Jawaese to thank them grandly for the excellent service. Wedge dared another peek across the table.

This time, Yana returned a shy smile.

Wedge's heart thudded...

A boot kicked a boot under the table. Luke pulled over a fork and tightened a quiet, sing song voice to the woman sitting next to him. "Shut up."

Wedge lowered his gaze to the table. _I feel like I'm under a fucking Jedi microscope._

Once the madness quieted, Leia spoke again. "Wedge? Do you remember that favor I asked?"

"I'm on it." He reported with ease. "I'll comm you tomorrow with the details."

"Good." Then, "Where are you guys? What are you eating?"

Nik leaned over the table to speak low and husky to describe the delicious grease and meat of Tee Dee Q's dewback barbecue. Leia admitted it sounded really good right now, so Nik waved over a waiter and murmured in Jawaese again. Luke and Kess chatted more about off-whites and fresh greens as they all began to eat, and Nik brought his attentions back to the table to report into the comlink again. "You've got a big greasy dewback dish coming at you right now, you're highnessness."

Wedge and Luke both flicked widened eyes at Nik.

Leia laughed through the comm. "You are too kind, Nik. Thank you. I gotta go."

"Bye!' Tayla called.

 _Click._

Luke shook his head at Nik. Even Yana looked stunned by that one. Nik shrugged his hands. "What?"

Wedge explained politely. "That nickname was reserved for her husband."

Nik's face melted with regret. "Awe, man, I'm sorry."

Wedge patted him firmly on the shoulder. "It's okay, man, you didn't know."

"Maybe we should take the food to her ourselves and cheer her up a bit."

Yana shook her head firmly to that plan. Tayla offered instead. "Or you could send her a cake."

Nik complimented Tayla on a good idea and motioned over a menu so they could pick a suitable desert together.

Wedge murmured to Luke with concern, "Is she doing okay?"

"She's..." Luke grimaced a bit, then, "We all have our good days and our bad days." Luke met the man's eye to express how true that was to everyone at this table.

Wedge absorbed that. Maybe he misread everyone else trying to sweep the war under the carpet. Maybe they were all still mourning in privacy, like he was.

"We should have her over for dinner." Kess said over a bite. "Get her out of that lonely apartment so she can be normal for one night."

"That's a good idea," Luke agreed.

"Can you help me out with that," Kess asked Yana. "Call it wedding plans so she can't say 'no'?"

Yana nodded and typed. Tayla giggled as she read. "Yes, but that means you have to decide on some of this shit."

Wedge laughed low. His eyes were bright. He snagged another glance of her.

And green eyes glittered playfully back.

"Okay. I'll get to work," Kess groaned, then she tried not to look guilty by keeping her eyes on her food as she said, "That means you two have to come over, too."

Luke tightened his lips- _thud_.

"Owe," Kess yipped.

Wedge's mouth parted with a breath, trying not to be a creep with too many glances. Yana wrinkled one eye shut with a reluctant grin. Nik picked up the last of the communal flat bread and threw it across the table at his sister. "You slaymo!"

Kess dodged the food and Luke laughed in agreement at the punishment. Tayla tried to sit up and throw food too... but as the flowering food fight was nipped in the bud by the adults, Wedge glanced over and pressed an apologetic grin, mouthing voicelessly. _Sorry_.

Yana made a tiny motion to wave it off as pure girly girl fodder. _S'okay._

By the time dinner was over, Wedge was confident Yana knew he wasn't trying to be a pressuring heathen about all this (the pressure was only coming from the rest of them). Nik was teasing Tayla about stupid things to keep the conversation bouncy as the six of them rode the elevator together to the parking level. Yana fanned her neck again once they were back in the air conditioning and Wedge agreed with her assessment by rattling the collar of his tunic against his chest.

Once on the surface, Nik and Tayla had sprung into a game of grab ass like an uncle and niece, Kess and Luke were comparing schedule notes on when to have Leia and Chewie over for dinner, and the four Jedi moved as an unkempt family to their speeder at the end of the lot.

Wedge had to go left to get to his. Yana seemed to be drifting right to get to hers. Good byes and good nights were called through the windy night air as all split up, when suddenly Tayla broke off from her group and ran full speed back.

She handed Yana the twin datalink, smiled goodnight, and returned as if worried the others might leave her behind.

Yana gathered both links in her hands, gave Wedge another shy grin, and turned-

"Hey." Wedge said before he thought about it, and instantly kicked himself in the pants for saying anything at all.

Yana turned to look at him, guarded.

He wasn't sure what he was going to say, but now he redirected to say something else entirely. "Would you rather I have Nik handle the planning?" He angled his head humbly, "So you and I don't have to-"

Red-brown eyebrows knitted like he was insane. She rattled her head and squinted at him with raging questions. Her hand motioned. _Why would you ask that?_

Wedge swallowed. "I got the impression..." he wasn't sure how to put it. He licked his lips and looked at the duracrete a moment, then lifted his face and stiffened his shoulders. "I don't know. I guess, I thought..."

Yana's face scrunched with annoyance. She tucked one datalink under her elbow and typed furiously on the other. Then, turning her feet, shoved it into his face so he could read the text on it just before she walked away.

If you don't want to comm me, just kriffing say so!

Wedge blinked and blatted. "What?"

But she was already storming off. He stood dumb as she climbed into her speeder, powered up, glared at him with the insult of it one last time, and lifted into the air.

Wedge's mouth hung open. Now standing alone on the sparse parking level, with a crisp night wind blowing against his face, his eyes watched her speeder lift into the traffic lane above and zoom off.

A piece of his heart went with her.

He suddenly felt a conscious weight, like a sucker punch from the grave, like shipmate had reached out to whack him across the back of the head.

 _You idiot,_ it said, _you saw us_ _watch that fatal blow coming to kill us, but you didn't see_ _us_ _pray that_ _you_ _would live to be happy in peace._

Wedge blinked hard. His stomach spun.

 _Come on, Rogue Leader, Don't blow this. Make our deaths worth something._

He found himself in his speeder without remembering climbing in. His face scrunched over the hand bars. A tear dribbled from his eye. He looked at nothing out at the night. It was almost as if he had learned some Jedi senses too, but they only told him one thing. Like a dozen voices of dead grease monkeys, a hundred voices of dead pilots, a thousand voices of troopers on the Death Star, a million voices of troopers on the second, and a billion voices on Alderaan.

And they all said the same thing.

Over and over.

 _Make our deaths worth something._

 _Make our deaths worth something._

 _Make our deaths worth something..._

 _You lived. Now you have a job to do:_

 _Go. Be. Happy._


	24. LL6 23 Chocolate Torte

Sitting at the snub end of her bar counter, Leia chewed her dinner without tasting it because her eyes were racing across the screen of a datapad by her elbow. Threepio stepped up and poured new water in her tea.

Without preamble, Leia burst in a laugh. She turned her eyes to look behind her at the man standing parade rest by her front door. "How did you end up contracting Bothan lice?"

Ren closed his eyes and grinned through an embarrassed squint. He hadn't realized what she was reading. "I was on assignment."

Leia swiveled around fully on the bar stool and faced the man down from the distance. "What was the assignment?"

"I was charged with infiltrating a rebel spy network."

She could only grin at that. "Did you catch them?"

"No."

She swiveled back to face the bar and looked at the date. It was only a month before the Battle of Endor. She stabbed her next bite and considered this as she chewed. "Is that why you weren't on the second Death Star at Endor?'

His mouth fidgeted a little, but he answered. "Yes."

"So you saved yourself but couldn't save your team."

"In a way."

Her tone was chill. "Explain." She kept her back to him.

He lifted his chin, prepared for debate. "I didn't catch them because I didn't try."

To this, Leia sat up and swiveled herself back around to stare at him.

And he just stared back.

"Why didn't you try?"

"Because I knew the Emperor would be on board when you attacked."

Leia considered that a long moment, then turned her back to him again. "I don't believe you."

His voice was quieter. "I don't expect you to."

The door beeped to unlock and Chewie came in with a sack of take out boxes of rich-smelling meat. He elbowed the door closed again, eyed Ren, barked at him, and took the package to the bar counter on which Leia was having her supper.

The Wookiee warbled conversationally and pulled out one of the meals, peaking to see what it was.

Leia looked over and grinned, "They sounded like they were having a good time."

Chewie warbled.

"No, go ahead. I'm already eating this." She pointed at her steamed vegetable medley with her fork.

Chewie sat down at the bar and Threepio offered him a plate, but the Wookiee was already gobbling the food from the take out container and shook his head.

Leia continued to read. Chewie ruffed that the stuff was good and reached over a forkful for her to taste. She gladly opened her mouth at let him feed her a bite.

In a flash, Ren jumped over to the bar and put his hand in front of her mouth. "Spit it out."

Leia wrinkled her brows at him and chewed anyway. "Why?"

"Because you don't know where this came from." He pulled over the sack and dug for clues.

Chewie complained at him.

Leia pointed with her fork. "It's from that Tatooine place Luke and Kess go to all the time. They never had any problems."

"They're not the Lord Chamberlain," Ren muttered, not seeing anything to raise alarm, but the foreign food was alarming by itself. "C -3PO, could you kindly run this through the ingredient analysis, please?"

Threepio took the second box of dinner and turned away with it. Chewie warbled another complaint at the man.

Ren eyed him back.

Half grinning, Leia combed a bite from a molar with her tongue. "He said he's already taste-testing it for me."

"I know what he said," Ren hissed firmly at her, but he sighed to regain his composure. "My lady, you don't know what lengths they will go to just to get you off that spire one way or another."

Actually, she did, but she answered with political calm. "And you do?"

"It's my job to know, madam." He opened the smaller, third package and found a slice of something chocolaty inside. He pushed it across the counter to Threepio. "Test this one, too."

Leia crumbled to a real laughter at this man. His concern was so genuine that it was comical. "Ren, sit down," she ordered.

"Beg your pardon?"

Leia motioned Threepio over with the now-tested plastic package. "Give it here."

Hesitantly, Ren half sat on the stool between Chewie and Leia, uncertain what she was up to.

Leia shoved the package of greasy food in front of the prim man and stabbed a fork in it until it stood up by itself. "Eat."

Chewie woofed with soft laughter.

"Um, madam, this is highly inappropriate."

"It's been tested now," Leia pointed out. "Shut up and eat."

Ren hadn't entirely sat down yet, much less pick up the fork. Chewie didn't bother to look as he reached over and grabbed Ren's forearm. The big furry palm slowly twisted the black sleeve backwards behind the man.

"All right. All right." Ren wriggled his arm free of the Wookiee's grip. Finally, he sat down fully on the stool and gave Leia a dark look. "Don't tell my supervisors." And he took a bite.

Chewie glanced over at that and huffed a single scoff of humor. Leia smiled at Chewie and back at Ren. "We'll make a rebel out of you yet."

Ren's eyes shot up at the insult before he realized it was supposed to be a compliment. His lips parted, unsure how to respond. Leia just chuckled at him, and Chewie chortled with similar soft humor. Threepio came back over with the now-tested chocolate something and Leia swallowed fast to wave that over too. "That one is for me."

The unfinished plate of vegetables slid away from her and the chocolaty slab of something slid into its place. She aimed her fork for a bite-

And her eyes flicked up.

Ren chewed oddly as he secretly watched Leia eat the chocolate torte without care. Leia's Jedi senses read man's discomfort clearly, and she warmed to find this man's entire bailiwick was a simple concern for her safety.

Brown eyes humored, Leia cut the first bite of the torte and set her elbow on the counter, offering a bite to him.

Ren blinked.

"Just to be sure it's not poisonous," she teased.

And he grinned suddenly. His eyes dashed down in silent admittance that he was perhaps going a little overboard with his safety measures. When his eyes came back up to meet hers, they bowed with humble apology. "Thank you, no."

Eyeing him with deep consideration, Leia promptly took a bite of the chocolate torte.

Ren considered her stare politely and tried to continue eating the greasy meat despite it.

"Why did you say?" She asked.

"Where?"

"In the Empire."

Ren stared at the food he hesitated to eat for a moment before raising his face to her. "Because I felt I could do more good within it, than I could outside of it."

Leia considered his words.

Ren angled his head and sighed, but he met her eyes with honesty again. "I'm not a spy. I'm not a rebel. I'm not built for that... And the Emperor wasn't _The Empire_. Things could still be... accomplished. Moments could still be swayed. And swayed better and easier from _within_ the ranks than outside of them."

Leia listened as she took another tasty bite.

"The Empire wasn't all bad. It wasn't all good either. And I, myself, had better chance to make a positive affect by working with it than against it."

"Such as failing; to catch the Bothan spy network?" She dared to inquire, eye to eye.

Ren pinched his lips and turned his eyes to his greasy plate.

"Such as avoiding the second Death Star when you knew we were coming? And not telling your superiors to pass that word onto Palpatine?"

Ren's eyes shot up. "With respect, if you think he didn't know you were coming, you're damn fool."

Leia pressed a tight grin. "No, his fatal detriment was his arrogance to think we couldn't beat him."

"And now you've made a martyr of him," Ren pointed out gently. "Imagine how much more effective it would have been had you simply politicized him out of power."

She blinked with difficulty. "Without a Senate?"

Ren shook his head gently. "That's not the only form of political power."

Leia looked at her cake a moment, but didn't take another bite. Instead, she set down her fork and challenged him directly. "What do you think we should have done?"

But Ren only lifted his chin and met her challenge with direct eyes of his own. "I don't know."

Leia settled.

"I'm not a politician," he said. "I'm a security guard and soldier. I don't understand the inner workings of it. Certainly not as well as you." He admitted with true respect. "All I know is that direct confrontation isn't the only way to get it done."

To this, Leia pressed her lips and nodded. The man was right about that much.

"As for my part, at first, he had some good ideas. He seemed to cut through the tangle and get done what needed to get done. But, eventually, as always, absolute power corrupts absolutely. And he grew more interested in protecting his power than sorting things out for his people."

Leia eyed him, hearing him, learning to understand him and all the others that fell into that same belief.

Ren eyed the food and finally stabbed out a healthy bite for himself. "What we seem to all forget ... was that, in the beginning, it all made a little more sense. The plans had traction. The propaganda was believable. The enemies," he motioned respectfully to her, "were legitimate."

Leia rubbed her lips in thought.

"It was until the middle that patterns emerged. It wasn't until the end that we realized we were at the whims of a monster." He tightened his eyes and shook his head, "But he wasn't _always_ a monster." He toyed with the food a moment, then stabbed another bite. "So, give us some credit for the ideals we had _hoped_ he would finally be able to bring about... the kind of ideals that the former Senate couldn't begin to touch."

Leia took a bite of the chocolate torte as she considered this deeply from an Imperial loyalist point of view. Senates are messy. And the people were frustrated with their inaction, their inability to affect certain things. Couple that with controlled media full of propaganda and one had the perfect recipe for the rise of a fascist regime.

Finally, Leia realized what Ren was trying to say, underneath all that he was actually saying. He was once an Imperial loyalist, but over the course of years implementing the authority of that same Emperor, somehow Ren woke up and began to see what it had truly become.

"What turned you?" She dared to ask.

"Ma'am?"

"You've made clear why you held hopes for him and his Empire in the beginning. What was it that turned you to work against him toward the end?"

Ren's eyes were direct. His mouth closed with severity. His voice was cold. "They blew up my home planet."

The words hit her in the soul, not because she felt the same way, but because she was reminded that she wasn't the only one who felt the same way. She bowed her chin to show her respect for that answer.

Ren admit humbly. "A bickering congress is frustrating beyond beleif." Then he smiled, "But, good Lord, it's better than the alternative."

Leia grinned and nodded agreement to that. Then she cut out a bite of torte and offered it over to him. "Peace offering?"

Ren's eyes shined, and this time, he took the bite.


	25. LL5 24 Run Away

Days blended together. And there was no light at the end of this tunnel. Work on the big projects was continuously procrastinated in the attempt to wipe out the smaller ones, as if the small projects were solvable.

Gina convinced the school master to let her return to work before the suspension had ended, but that meant Ben also returned to school, troubled, struggling, and acting out with skills he didn't know how to control. Tayla's new school was great until the teachers required her to perform home study on a daily basis and prove it with paperwork of solved math problems and little written blurbs about history. Wedge managed to get the Imperials trained in A-Wings and the Rebels trained in TIE fighters, but both were shot at by hand-held blaster fire every time a pair of either swooped over Coruscant in a standard rover watch. Leia stood calm and cool on the spire to control the mikes of the Senate, timing their speeches as needed to ensure all voices had the same amount of voice, but it resulted in well-funded groups retaliating with a new campaign of attack ads against *her*. Nik tried comm Gina on several occasions, as much to proclaim how long he'd gone without a drink as to see an image of his little scrapper, but the woman would never pick up the call. Yana met with the doctors to check the healing of her last surgery at which they gladly announced she could start thinking about an implant, and they showed her a half-dozen options in sales-flyer form, bragging about all the inhuman capabilities that could come with each, including the wireless interlinking to add more advanced programming and 'learn' even more languages than she already knew. Ren reported into Grand Moff Jakobi and the Imperial Party's Leadership by Purple Command orders, during which he was questioned at length about his observations in the Lord Chamberlain's private and top secret affairs. He was then threatened at length that he would be reassigned to stand guard at a recycling facility for the rest of his life when he refused to reveal anything beyond the actual security measures that kept the rebel Chamberlain safe. Luke went to the At'Bintarians and Tyronans, individually and directly, to wriggle his way out of the Rock and the Hard Spot that their different Jedi Academy construction requirements put him in, but each faction was devout in their religious theme that all buildings *must* be wood or *must* be stone, and all power *must* be wind or *must* be solar; and no, you can't break ground until you get agreement of *our* requirements from the *other* side. Kess proved quickly to have *zero* talent in mediation, and so spent more and more time out of the conference room and in her unadorned office researching and summarizing the data Luke would need to do all the mediation himself. Each time his eyes asked her to leave the room felt like demotion. As much as he seemed appreciative of her notes and raved at how helpful she was to summarize complexities into bullet points he could quickly read, she could see the weariness in his eyes growing day by day as he tried to handle all those bickering arguments by himself.

The Senate Ball? Thank the Force they'd already picked out their clothes and blocked off the calendar, because they didn't have time to think about how soon it was coming up. The Jedi Academy? They were at a dead stop until they had time to do the research and bullet point summaries for themselves to figure out how to get these two opposite ideas to meet in the middle on construction requirements. New students to rally some help with all this? The Jedi Records still piled up in the corner of the office, still largely unpacked, and not collecting dust only because of the housekeeping efforts of Eye-D and Artoo.

A wedding?

 _What_ wedding?

Oh. Yeah. _Ours_.

Thoughts were felt and received strongly through the Force, even if the words were never openly spoken.

 _I don't want kids. Not yet. Please don't make me._

 _Why would we get married at all if you don't want children?_

Evenings were absorbed by being premature parents to a whining pre-teen and an adult struggling to stay sober. Evenings were absorbed by annoying roommates who didn't bother to read a datalink to know what you had to say and by old pilot friends 'stopping by' to complain into the midnight hours about their new wingmen. Evenings were reading political arguments and watching edited videos of yourself spliced together until your own words said the exact opposite of everything you were trying to do. Evenings were consumed with pouring over confidential security reports to see the text highlighted where direct physical attacks on a pregnant princess were clearly in the works. Evenings were sitting on the floor against the wall, fidgeting your own hands until they rubbed themselves raw, trying to meditate, trying not to cry, trying not to wonder why she didn't answer, trying not to worry how your son was doing, trying not to barge into the kitchen and partake in that half-empty bottle of retago they had hiding in the back of the cupboard. Evenings were endless embarrassments fretting over homework on things you should already know at your age, and knowing that not having a clue about any of this stuff proved you were just plain stupid.

Sex? What sex? You need to meditate a lot more than you need sex right now. Sleep? Sure, but only those nights the memory of char-fried Rogue Repair didn't wake you up in a cold sweat. Decisions? You can have a life or you can have a career, but your life _is_ your career. (It's not like good looking pilot is trying to comm you.) Security? She was pregnant and her husband was dead, so p rotecting her stress level was as important as protecting her person; as a result, plugging all these holes of risk without her awareness was like playing deadly game of whack-a-mole. Resolution? It didn't matter which side talked more or which side you shut up faster, no one is willing to budge on their conspiracy theories and retribution demands, and everything you say is going to get spliced into a new attack add of bantha fodder. Sobriety? You lost your wife and your son, what the fuck do you have to stay sober for? Jedi Apprentice? Such a thing requires daily baths, table manners, endless homework, and abandonment of your friends and fun, maybe you don't want it anymore. Stability? You just kicked out your number one source of support, the mortgage is due in a week, and going back to work means your son goes back to school, still acting out and using Force tricks you never knew he had.

Like lanterns sparking towards failure and hanging miles apart on an electric wire, nine people tried to 'handle it' on their own.

But none of them were making any progress doing it that way.

 _Tayla? Can you still hear me?_

Tayla's chin and arms slumped on the black dining room table only to stare at a problem she had no idea how to understand, much less answer, but asking for help would only prove her stupidity. Somehow she felt she'd figure it out if she stared at it long enough, so she was glad to hear the man's voice again, the first time in a long time.

 _Yes,_ she thought clearly. _Where you been?_

 _I have an idea,_ he said with a smile in his old voice. _And I need your help to implement it._

 _Can you help me with this homework?_

 _I can help you *get help* with the homework_ , he said, _but only if you help me first._

Tayla sat up and concentrated. _What do you want me to do?_

 _I want you to run away._

Tayla's thoughts shifted with confusion. He was the one who told her to come here in the first place.

 _Instead of coming back here after school tomorrow, I want you to go down and see if you can find that dead garden again._

 _The one I found when I was little? That was a long time ago. I don't know if I can get back there._

 _Little._ His old, easy voice chuckled. _You were nine. It was hardly two years ago._

 _I still don't know if I can find it again. I was lost that day._

 _I know. I'll be with you. Take your commlink in case you get too lost. Take some snacks and some hydrate. You know how to take care of yourself on such journeys. But go try to find it-that dead garden. The one with all statues. Do you remember?_

 _I think so._

 _Good._

 _Why do you want me to run away from them? You told me to come to them._

His voice was smooth, gentle, and humored at his own idea. _Because I want them to have to_ _find_ _you..._


	26. LL6 25 Homework Fuel

Tayla let herself get lost in the background at this new school. She always sat in the back because she didn't like it when people sat behind her where she couldn't see them. The other kids didn't like her, and she didn't need the Force to know that. They peeked at her, and they whispered to each other, and they peeked at her again, and they would giggle. In the few weeks she'd been in this place with these strange kids and these stranger teachers, Tayla grew angrier and angrier that she wasn't welcome.

It was like her world flipped upside down in that respect, because now she _liked_ it when school was over and she could go home. Before, she would stroll home empty handed, hang out with some friends on the street, boost something that looked fun or yummy, and avoid wandering home to the whore house until hunger or exhaustion or boredom won out. Her mom was usually working by the time she got there, and would work into the early morning hours long after Tayla put herself to bed. Hanging out with one of the ladies who didn't have a customer that night was her only adult guidance, and any attention she got was often cut short when a customer did come in and decided Tayla's company was the one he wanted. For years, school was a safe escape.

Now, school sucked and home was the safe escape. Now she had a heavy backpack to haul home on public transit, preventing any easy means to run if she tried to boost something. She had no one to hang out with and kill some time... unless she went home.

She avoided Nik because he was a grown up man who didn't go to whore houses, and his wife was a half a galaxy away, so Tayla didn't understand why he wasn't pawing her all the time. Eventually, she realized all he ever tried to talk to her about was if she ate, and if she hadn't, what she wanted to eat. More days than not, he paused by the dining table to peek at her staring at her homework and offer some help, but she always turned him down with a guarded eye. The man always seemed to receive her decline lightly and strolled away. It was almost as if he didn't have any ulterior motives, but that didn't make any sense! When grown men wanted to help, it was because grown men _wanted_ something. And Tayla figured it out quickly that Luke never offered because he had Kess to get what _he_ wanted, so Luke didn't need Tayla for his man business. But this Nik guy... it just didn't add up.

Today, Tayla thought about all that during her classes, and hauled her backpack home on transit thinking about it more. When the subway stopped at her usual stop and her green eyes traveled out to what had become a familiar walk to go to her new home, she picked up her backpack with a split decision.

 _I don't want to go to the dead garden today._ She thought loudly. _I'll do it tomorrow, okay?_

The nice man in her head didn't answer. And she didn't feel any disappointment or anger coming from some hidden corner of her soul either. (He was never disappointed or angry with her anyway, so that wasn't surprising.) She didn't know if he heard her, but he didn't argue with her, so she took that as permission to do her own thing today.

Tayla came up the elevator and loud music was beating the air in the apartment. Nik came out of the kitchen half-dancing, bobbing his head, and smiling to mouth the words of the song. Tayla looked at him like he was crazy.

"I'm trying to distract myself," he finally smiled as he turned back to the kitchen. "You want me to turn it down so you can stare at your homework better?"

Suddenly angry, Tayla dumped the heavy backpack on a dining chair and argued, "I don't just stare at it. I _do_ it."

The music lowered to a background volume and Nik wandered out nibbling on a cookie. "Whatever you say." His eyes smiled. Clearly, he didn't believe her at all, but he wasn't going to argue with her about it either.

"I _do_ it!" She demanded.

He shrugged. "I'm not saying you don't."

"But you're thinking it," she spat and slumped down in the dining chair. She stared at that stuffed backpack and worried about all the work in it.

"You don't know what I'm thinking." Nik chuckled and turned back to the kitchen.

 _Yes, I do_. Tayla thought. _You're a grown up man. I know exactly what you're thinking._ But she didn't say anything about it, because she knew he'd just deny it anyway. She pulled out the datapads of her work and tried to figure out which subject she'd stare at first.

Nik came back out with a plate of cookies and set them on the dining table in front of her. "Have a cookie."

Untrusting, her eyes shifted up to stare at him. He wouldn't offer something like this if he didn't want something for it.

Nik sat down opposite her at the table, both of them using the last chairs on one side because all those untouched piles of Jedi Academy notes stacked in semi-organized piles on the other. Tayla's green eyebrows knitted in the middle of her dark face. "What do you want?"

But the man's eyes were tilted to read the titles of her different homework, flicking only to look at her when the untrusting ice in her voice cut across the table at him.

"You want the real truth?"

Tayla crossed her arms tightly at her chest and gave him a hard look.

Nik looked her in the eye with honesty. "I want to find something to distract myself so I don't have a drink."

Tayla blinked back.

"And that's the honest truth."

"I can't help you." Tayla spat and sat up to her homework again.

"Sure you can," Nik murmured and started picking up a datacard. "You can teach me what I'm going to need to teach Ben in a couple of years."

It was just a ploy. She huffed and hissed it into the open. "I'm not going to have sex with you! Leave me alone!"

Nik blinked back and rattled his head. His mouth hung open, his brown eyes bulged wide, and humorous surprise filled his face. "Well, _good_! Cuz I'm not going to have sex with you either!" He snickered briefly and added an adolescent shout. "So _there_!"

Tayla didn't understand his reaction.

Nik's eyes shined. His volume dropped to conversational, and his grin flashed from time to time at how silly it was to let her down easy. "Look, Tayla, you're a fine looking woman and all, but I'm married, _and your eleven_. So I'm sorry, baby, it's just not going to happen."

He was talking like _she_ had offered it? The girl didn't know how to fight back to that.

"Honest!" Nik pronounced and brought one of her datacards in front of himself. "I'm just trying not to have a drink." He plugged it into a pad and turned it on. "I don't understand Artoo and Eye-D bores the crap out of me. You're the only one in the house to talk to."

So, maybe he did want something for the cookies?

"Ooh! Algebra." He peeped. "I think I remember this." He picked up a cipher...

Tayla shot out of her chair and came around the table to snatch it from him. "Don't do my homework for me! I'll get in trouble!"

His hand held it away from her reach and his grinning brown eye peeked at her over his shoulder. "Would that be 'more' trouble or 'less' trouble than not doing it at all?"

Her face scrunched.

"I'm just curious," he smiled.

Not sure how to debate that, she huffed through her nose.

Nik smiled and handed over the datapad of algebra. Once she took it, he pushed up from the table and stepped away, leaving the plate of cookies. "At least eat the cookies so they don't go to waste. It's good homework fuel, yknow." Tayla stood dumbfounded when he strolled away across the living room and disappeared into his bedroom, leaving the door open.

Tayla sat down. Maybe she should have tried to find the dead garden today after all. But she didn't want to be alone. Even if he was out of sight in a far corner of the apartment, she knew she wasn't alone. She set aside the history she was going to start with and instead looked at the algebra.

She looked at it a long time.

And then she got up and took it to the back of the house.

The grown man sat on the floor of his bedroom, his back to an empty wall, his elbows on his bent knees, and wrung his hands with stress. His eyes flicked when she appeared in the doorway.

Tayla licked her lips. She looked at her datapad. She shifted on her feet. She angled her head. Her voice was uncertain. "You promise you're not gonna-" she swallowed hard. "You promise you won't-" She wasn't even sure what to call it all.

Nik shifted his seat to look her directly in the eyes. "Tayla, not all grown men want that from you."

She swallowed hard.

"In fact, _most_ of them don't," he added. "You've just been surrounded your whole life by the few creeps that do."

She struggled with her words and looked at her homework, finally admitting. "There's more than a few."

Nik pressed his mouth with reluctant sympathy and nodded understanding. Then he looked her in the eye again, and raised his palms in a swear. "I promise," and he smiled humorous again, "and if it makes you feel better, you're about twenty years too young for my type anyway."

"So why did you want to help me?"

"I'm a _father_ , Tayla," he smiled at his ease of it. " _This is what I do._ I'd be helping Ben if he were here. But he isn't." He shrugged. "Besides, we're both Jedi Apprentices, right? You've got stuff you can teach me. I've got stuff I can teach you. No reason to make Luke and Kess do all the hard labor on us."

"What could I teach you?"

Nik shrugged again, "For one thing, you can teach me how to help Ben with his algebra when he gets into eleventh level."

She looked at her homework again, considering.

Nik still hadn't gotten up. He still hadn't reached for her. And everything he said sounded genuine, especially this, "I could really use the help."

Tayla conceded with a high nose of confidence. "Okay, I'll help you. But if you lay one finger on me, I'm going to sneak into your room at night and pour a bucket of fire ants in your bed."

Nik tried not to look humored by that. He tried to nod with deep severity and a little bit of fear. "I think that's a fair trade."

Giving her a lot of space, Nik climbed back to his feet and walked back to the dining table with her. He sat down in the chair next to hers because he would have to look over his shoulder, but he made sure his hands stayed on the table top or on his own knee. He took great care he didn't even bump into her with his elbow. Tayla picked up a cipher and scrunched a broken hearted face at the algebra, "If this is math, why are there _letters_ in it?"

"Ah ha! Let me show you." Grinning softly, he pulled the algebra homework away from her hands and looked over the table for an empty card he could use for scratch work. She had nothing of the sort in her collection, so he leaned toward the other end of the table to see if any blanks were amongst the Jedi Homework. He found one, but his eyes snagged curiously on the titles of the others.

Kindly, patiently, and keeping his hands far away from her person, Nik began with the basics. Aurek equals 4, helping her visualize that aurek was maybe some apples. "So, how many apples?"

"Four?"

"Right." So he sketched more onto the screen. "So let's say, you have all these apples over here, and I don't how many there are, because you've got them hiding behind your back or something. But I see you throw away two of them. So how do I figure out how many apples you have behind your back...?" He broke it down in smaller bits, eventually talking about a bag of apples because she complained she couldn't hold that many apples at once, and instead of "doing algebra" they talked about logical ways he could figure out the number of apples in the sack with other available data.

Nik recognized the real problem right away: Tayla missed large pieces of her first few formal years of education. She didn't have the basics on which to build all this eleven level stuff. So he gave her the kinds of problems that Ben was probably having to do right now. Each time, he gave her plenty of time to sort out the new puzzle in her head and sat back with patience, during which his curious eyes drifted back towards the Academy clutter at the other end of the table.

Once someone took the time to explain the basics, Tayla picked it up quickly and grew excited that she could solve these simple problems by herself. When she paused, and he tried to explain, she snapped at him to wait a minute because, "I can do it myself!" So Nik shrugged and sat back again... and his eyes drifted until he leaned over to peek again at the titles at the other end of the table.

Within a half an hour, Tayla was working on her actual homework, and Nik brought over a few curious titles about wind power and solar power. Standing by to answer questions that frequently popped up, he spent the dead time browsing the brochures of overwhelmingly large power facilities.

"Good lord, how many students do they think they're going to fit in twenty klicks of land."

Tayla tried to peek over. "Whatchyou lookin at?"

Nik scrunched a face at this stuff. "Their Academy construction stuff... You work on that. Let me work on this." He sat up and brought over another blank and cipher. "Later, we can check each other's homework. Deal?"

"Okay," she nodded, and then she grinned shyly. "Do cookies _really_ help you with your homework?"

"Absolutely!" He declared, looking at her like she was crazy for thinking otherwise. He grabbed two cookies, handed her one, and ate the other. "But I won't make them again unless you let me help you with your homework."

Tayla tried to smile secretly as she chewed on the cookie. This was the best con she ever pulled off. Her feet swung free under the chair as she turned her attentions to the next problem.

Nik peeked at her out of the corner of his eye, hid a smirk of success, and sat back to consider a totally different puzzle as he chewed on his cookie. In seconds, he began to sketch an entirely different power facility and grinned to realize that cookies do indeed make the best homework fuel.


	27. LL6 26 Shifting Focus

Luke and Kess rolled in later than usual that night, and they seemed to be suffering from an earlier fight because they were both extra quiet and extra distant from each other. Luke plopped down sacks of take-out food and Kess went to fetch plates for everyone. Nik and Tayla were energetic and bouncy like a pair of siblings, but the Jedi Master's didn't seem to have the patience for it.

Nik noticed and decidedly didn't ask. Tayla didn't notice. She brought over her homework to show Kess with beaming pride. "I did all my algebra today."

Kess's brows knitted at this announcement. "Don't you _usually_ do that?" A spike of warning on the Force alerted her to glance at Nik. Secretly, he scrunched his nose and shook his head.

 _Oh crap, I haven't been checking her homework. Was I supposed to?_

While Kess turned her responsibilities to Tayla and her successful homework, Nik slid the wind power brochure in front of Luke's dinner plate. "I did some homework, too."

Luke struggled to give the man his attention, and shrugged out a weary sigh. "Did you drink?"

"No." Nik smirked, and now slid the solar power brochure down next to the wind power brochure."

"Did you meditate?"

"Yes." Now he slid his sketch to rest between the two brochures.

Luke shrugged his fork. "Well done." And shrugged again chuckling briefly at how easy that was.

Nik hadn't fixed up his plate yet. First, he wove his fingers together and rested his elbows on the table top to look at Luke like he was crazy. "How many kriffing people do you think you're going to fit into twenty kilometers?"

Luke's eyes went from one brochure, to the other, and landed on the sketch that blended both ideas into a single, smaller structure. His mouth stopped chewing and his face peered closer.

Nik motioned at the sketch, "I don't know anything about infrastructure," he grabbed a plate and began serving up his own dinner. "But I know I've seen one of those before."

Distracted, Luke tried to take another bite and his fork almost missed his mouth.

Nik explained, "Solar takes up too much space because it's slow to charge. Wind clutters the hillsides because it's not windy enough there. And you're not going to power a whole damn city or a mining facility." He stuffed a bite into his mouth and motioned with his fork. "So scale down and use them both in a tandem unit."

After only two bites, Luke shoved his dinner aside and pulled the sketch closer.

And his eyes flicked up with a fresh sparkle.

As the discussion between the men lit up with energy, Kess shot a dark glance over her shoulder about it, but otherwise kept her complete attention on Tayla's childish thrill to explain to Kess how to do her algebra problems. Kess recognized that Tayla was acting eleven tonight, instead of acting years older or years younger than she really was. She engaged Tayla for all the attention Tayla wanted and tried not to get annoyed by the thrill now coming out of Luke's Force Print.

She held it in. Through dinner and clean up, through ensuring the bath happened and the nightly girly girl hang-out time as Tayla got ready for bed, Kess held it in. Nik and Luke were now out there talking vibrantly to sort out ideas and look up stuff in the office. Kess sat on Tayla's bed and reminded her to sonic her teeth, brushed the girl's straight green hair (it always helped the girl meditate), and chatted about whatever Tayla wanted to chat about.

"The man told me to run away yesterday."

Kess paused. "Why?"

"He said he wanted you guys to have to come find me."

Kess brushed the smooth hair and scrunched her face. " _Why?_ I mean, of course we would, but why?"

"Dunno. I didn't though."

"No? How come?"

"Because I didn't want you think I was playing games with you."

Behind the girl, Kess nodded. "And I appreciate that."

Tayla turned around to look at her. "But I think you should see the dead garden anyway."

To this, Kess grinned. "Okay. I'll bite. What's so cool about a dead garden?"

"It's got a lotta statues."

"What kind of statues?"

"Big ones." Tayla said, and turned back so the peaceful hair-brushing could resume. "Most been cut off the top by the palace though."

Kess's eyes paused on the air. Her mouth slowly grinned. "I take it some of the statues have lightsabers in their hands?"

"Never noticed. But maybe."

Kess grinned as she brushed. "Well. . . you tell him that you don't have to run away. We can all go look at it together."

Tayla peeped with eleven-year-old glee. "Really?"

Kess nodded, and added. "And tell him I want to know what his blasted name is or he better stop talking to you."

Within a half hour after that, Kess sat down and slumped on her side of the bed to pull off her boots and Luke energetically paced in unable to take his eyes off a datapad as he began to unbutton his tunic. "Hey, look at this."

Kess closed her eyes and shook her head. "Can I look at it tomorrow?" She didn't even turn to look at _him_.

Luke tossed the datpad onto the bed and paced to the other corner of the room. His voice was cold. "I didn't order you to leave the room."

"You may as well have," she whispered.

Finally, Luke turned to shout, "Kess, I'm not your damn commander! And I'm not your master. And if you don't want to leave the room, _don't leave the room_." He turned his back to her back and yanked off his tunic.

Kess closed her eyes and shook her head. "I'm not doing you any good in there."

He rolled his eyes and nearly smiled in his whine, "Then why are you mad at me!?"

She shifted on the bed and shouted back, "Because I'm not doing you any good in there!"

Still on his feet in the corner, Luke settled, sighed slowly, and nodded with respect.

Kess pinched the bridge of her nose. "I can't do this political stuff like you can." She complained, embarrassed, ashamed. She shrugged her hand to the bed. "And you can get a droid for everything I've been able to do in there."

Luke sat down on his side of the bed, back to distant back, and pulled off his boots. "We don't need to get a droid if you want to do it-

"I don't want to do it." She nearly interrupted him. She leaned against a locked elbow and half-turned to look at his back. "I like it more than being in the bull pen but..." she shook her head. "If this is what a Jedi career looks like..."

Now in nothing but his pants, Luke half- turned on the bed to squint back at her and whined once more. "When did I ever tell you what a Jedi career was _supposed_ to look like?"

Kess closed her mouth. He had a point. But her brows still knitted hard.

He shook his head and closed his eyes, and suddenly smiled the truth of it. "Kess, if you haven't figured it out by now, I will say it plainly: _I am making this fodder up as a go along_!" His admission finished in a chuckle.

Kess face splashed with reluctant humor. Finally the tension shattered, and she sighed hard and closed her eyes for a moment. She shrugged again, "But what else is there?"

Luke stood to shake off his pants and tossed them into the laundry chute. And, since he was standing there, as he often did, waited with catchers hands so she could throw over hers as well. So Kess pulled off her tunic and tossed it to him, continuing her argument. "Without a war to fight, what else is there but politics or political research." She tossed over her pants, then added with a dark note, "or raising your babies." She conveniently turned her naked back to him as she pulled out a night shirt. She didn't want to see the look on his face after that comment.

He didn't say anything at first, but his voice was quiet when he did. "Those aren't your only options." He climbed into bed.

Once covered, she turned and whipped the covers out of her way. "You got any other ideas?"

Now, his brows knitted. His mouth spread across his face as annoyed as it was grinning to say this. "Sure. Go research other options for us." He shrugged his hands at why this had to be so difficult.

Kess dropped against the pillow, but her face twisted and her palms spread.

Luke snorted out a smile, leaned over her face until he was nose to nose and pretended to glare. " _I don't have all the answers!_ "

She laughed and shoved him away by the shoulder. Luke chortled and fell sideways against his pillow. "I swear, I'm going to have to that out in a press release before you stop acting like I do."

Kess acquiesced with respect. "Well, you have to make everyone else think you do. I guess I should be honored that I get to know the truth."

Now laying in bed with the lights on, face to face against their own pillows with an arm's length distance between them, they stared at each other for a moment of deepening severity.

His voice was hesitant. "Look, I know you don't want to talk about it. And I'm not trying to talk you into it yet-

Her eyes closed against the emotional pressure, and her throat constricted with the want to shed a tear of stress over this topic.

Luke paused, but he pushed through it. "I don't know that it's true, but I wonder if it might be, and I just want you to think about it."

"Just say it," she whispered in defeat.

He shifted his head on his elbow and reached out to put a hand on hers to make her open her eyes and look back at him. "If you think I ever expected you to stay home and just raise babies the whole time..." he shook his head, "You don't know me as well as I thought."

She flashed a shy smile and shook her head. "No, I didn't think that."

"But you're acting like it," he pointed out. "So I am wondering if maybe you're afraid that you're going to have to do it all by yourself."

Kess started to argue, but her eyes shifted before she spoke.

"Leia doesn't have Han. You're jumping in mid-project on Tayla. And I know it's crossing your mind what Gina's probably going through right now. And I know you think that if the galaxy needs saving again I'm going to run off and take care of some mission and leave you home to hold down the fort."

"You know if you had to, I would."

" _Exactly_." He stressed. "And I think part of your hesitation is that you fear you're going to have to hold down the fort -alone- the whole time. Your mother sacrificed everything to do what was best for you and Nik, but your dad was useless, no offense."

"He was better than yours," she noted with a touch of humor.

Luke laughed, "Point taken." But he calmed and explained more freely now. "But consider this, Leia and I don't remember our mother _at all_. And our father tried to kill us both... But she still had Bail and Breha, and I still had Beru and Owen. As slanted as the shift of power was in my homestead, they were a team about it. And even though your dad was not dependable, your mother didn't raise you alone. She had Obi Wan and your grandmother to help. Leia's daughter isn't going to have Han, but she'll have _me_. Tayla can't depend on her mother and she doesn't even know who her father was, but she has _us_. My point is, the ones that do the raising aren't always the parents. And you have more people to help than you think."

She fretted, "Like who?!"

"Aunt Yana?" He stressed. "Uncle Wedge?" He smiled when Kess humbled to this. He gestured his free hand. "Do you really think Leia's not going to be in your way trying to take over the care of her niece? If you run into trouble, do you think Nik's going to say he's too busy to help? He just single-handedly got Tayla to actually finish her damn homework for once!"

"I didn't know she wasn't doing it." She admitted with a shy squint.

"Exactly," he said. "He helped before you knew to ask." He watched her eyes shift to the air as she visualized his point with humility. "All I'm asking is that you meditate a little on the possibility that you're afraid to have kids because you're afraid of having to do it all alone. And if that's true, I'm asking you to meditate a little longer on the truth that you have a lot more support than you give yourself credit for."

"Okay." Kess nodded at the blankets, but her eyes lifted back up. "So let me ask you this?"

He lifted a finger from the blanket. "Can I turn off the light?"

"Sure."

His finger swished in the air and the light disappeared. "Okay, go."

"Why aren't you helping me with Tayla?" Her tone was almost accusational.

"I've been thinking about that. I'm trying to figure out how I can help with the raising of her without disrupting your authority as her master. I'm just not sure how to do that yet. That's all."

Kess was surprised. "You think we're going to raise her the rest of the way?"

"Well, geez, I _hope_ we do," he nearly coughed.

"I felt bad I didn't ask you about that before I made the decision."

His voice shrugged. "Even if you had, you know what my answer would have been. She's an apprentice; the more time she spends with us, the better."

Kess stared at the darkness to think on that for a long time. "So, now I'm going to ask _you_ to meditate on something..."

"Sure. What?"

She thought how to word it before saying it. "I want you to think long and hard how much you would want kids if you _knew_ they _weren't_ going to be Force Sensitive."

"Well, that doesn't make any sense-"

"I'm not talking about the real odds. I'm talking about the what if."

He was confused. "Why?"

"Because I have a right to know if I'm bearing children for you, or if I'm just bearing _apprentices_ for you."

"Mm." He paused a moment, but his response was fair. "You're right. I never quite thought of it like that."

"So I guess we both have homework to do." Her fingers blindly found his on the bed and curled under them in firm little finger-hug.

His fingers hugged back, and then they began to pull her in until both bodies wrapped around each other in a comfortable cuddle.

"Y'know what else we have to do?"

"I can't even begin to list-

"We have to go down and start checking out the old temple ruins."

His head shifted. "Why?"

"I'm a little worried that the nice man in Tayla's head might not be what we think he is."

"You don't think it's a dead Jedi?"

"I don't know. But I'm starting to wonder if it might be a dead Sith."

"What does the temple have to do with that?"

"He told her to run away from us and go down there so we'd have to try to find her. I don't like the idea that he told her to run away at all. So I'm wondering if we'll either find 'ghosts' down there or _traps_ down there."

"Hm. Okay. Then... I just figured out a solution to your problem."

"What problem?"

"Tomorrow, when we go into work, you are now in charge of Temple Exploration. Research all the original construction records you can get your hands on and arrange an archaeology and cartography crew. And get Tayla's and Nik's help with anything part of the project you think they can do."

Kess's brows lifted in the darkness. Her hum smiled. "Hm."

"Boom. New Jedi career. See how easy that was?" He giggled into her hair.

"Shut up and go to sleep," her voice smiled deeply.

There was a long pause with both of them remaining alert and awake...

"Can we try to make babies first?"

"No." She giggled in spite of herself.

He snorted a fresh, squeaky snigger, "Can we _practice_?"


	28. LL6 27 Secret Datalink

Yana hated her roommates. They always hung out like slugs in the living room watching stupid shows and making the place stink with their death sticks. She didn't bother to wave hi anymore for they never bothered to look over to see if she did. Her new routine was to walk straight to her room and close the door for the rest of the night. Thankfully, each room had its own bathroom, and she usually snacked on a dinner while she worked a few extra hours at the data library, so she never had to come out, even to eat.

She dropped her tote in the corner and kicked off her shoes. She wasn't in the mood to deal with spy craft now; she wanted to rest before the galaxy stirred up more life-risking tension for her to have to deal with, but she made herself finish her workday with annoyance before she curled up in bed with a novel.

In the mail at work, she received another burner datalink. It was a common method of confidential communication amongst Imperials trying to get things done while avoiding fatal reprimand from their superiors. Now the practice was being thrust upon the rest of the new government as well. This wasn't the first she'd received. The two previous ones were from political operatives still fearing retribution if they tried to communicate directly with the Rebel Chamberlain. She wondered how long it would take them not to fear just walking up to the office and making an appointment.

But this was the first link that came with a note not to turn it on at the office. Whoever it was, they were truly paranoid, probably in fear that Ren Entada would 'observe' the communication and report it back to Purple Command. Yana wasn't stupid enough to follow any instructions beyond, 'please pass this information to the Lord Chamberlain', but after a check of the electronics inside to prove there wasn't a bomb or a bug in there somewhere, Yana shrugged it off that this one just came from a person a little more paranoid than the rest. She made herself a cup of tea and sat down at her tiny table in the corner, promising herself she wouldn't waste more than fifteen minutes on this project before instructing the other person they would have to continue the discussion when she was back on the clock.

Yana put on her mystery-solving mind and pulled the package from her tote, looking it over for clues. It was a standard, cheap, burner link, still in the flashy sales package, but missing one of the pair. She thumbed open the box and looked at the note. The letters were strong, blocky, and in basic. Turn me on at home. A man's handwriting, but that didn't narrow it down much.

She pulled out the link and set the box aside, squared it in front of her on the little table and noted the fresh plastic smell. Her finger flicked the switch and her eyes watched it scroll its settings as it booted up.

Andia-Tech Temp Datalink.

Hardwire communications. 

Settings:

Keep/Wipe on Shutdown - Wipe

Number of links on this channel - 2

External link up - off

External channel access - off

Handle List: 

0

1

Connection secured.

Connection scrambled.

...and a blinking cursor...

Yana cleared her throat and typed with her thumbs.

O Hi.

Assuming whoever it is on the other line wouldn't necessarily be ready to know when she would turn it on, she let it sit as she got up from the table to prepare for bed. A minute later in her comfy pajamas, she peaked to find she had an answer.

1 Hi.

Yana rolled her eyes. _You started this thing, fool. Don't make me ask you who you are and what you want._

She reached to type-

1 I'm sorry I didn't comm you sooner.

Her heart thumped in her chest. It could be a dozen people. It was probably someone she didn't even know. But her heart still thumped in her chest.

1 It took me a while to think of this.

1 I didn't want to be the only one in the conversation. 

Yana wasn't sure what to answer to that. She was still trying to make her heart stop pounding with hope, trying to convince herself that she didn't really know who it was on the other end.

1 Are you there?

0 Yes. she typed in a rush.

0 Just want to be sure this is who I think it is. 

She slammed her eyes shut. _Lame_. If it were someone trying to trick her, now they would just lay it on thicker. She tried to think of something clever to say.

1 Also

He entered that and the cursor flicked to the next line, but it took a moment before it posted.

1 I didn't want you to think I was comming just because Luke and Kess told me to.

Her habit was to not provide any hard data until the other end provided theirs.

1 Jedi can do a lot of cool things, but they need to stay out of the matchmaking business.

Yana hid her smile with her hand. She still wasn't sure what to say, but she didn't want her silence to come across as anger.

0 So why are you comming?

1 Because *you* told me to.

Yana wanted it to be him, but she rubbed her lips and tried to keep her mind from going wild.

0 Oh? When did I say that?

1 You're testing me. 

0 Yes, I am.

But she smiled big to type it. She knew who she wanted it to be, but she wasn't so naive to believe it until he said something concrete.

1 In the hospital. On the datalink. Just as we were leaving. 

Yana remembered back to when she was still in a hospital bed and the whole crowd showed up at once, glad to find her, thrilled to find her alive. Wedge was hesitant, almost boyish in nerves, and she was still a little drugged from the painkillers, so in a unique moment in time, she was the bold one and he was the shy one. She typed on the datalink that day, Comm me sometime. Wedge's eyes smiled more than his mouth did to read it, so much so that she believed that he would.

But then there was nothing. For weeks. No comm, no reason for him to pass through a CIC bunker, no reason for her to visit his squadron base, no convenient eatery to run into each other. Everybody was busy like crazy bees, sure. Everyone had to establish new routines, new places of residences, new local transportation... And everyone had to heal. Everyone had someone on The List to lament and cry it out of their systems. Everyone had bangs and bruises and broken bones in need of medical attention. Everyone had four times the amount of usual work to start sewing back together a Galactic government before the fragile peace fell apart again.

Yana recognized fully that the man had his excuses for delaying a comm call, but after a month and a half since that day in the hospital, his excuses were running thin.

1 I thought you didn't want me to comm you anymore. I was trying to give you space. I didn't realize until TDQs that I might be wrong.

Yana breathed a big smile. There it was. That was the concrete piece of evidence.

0 What made you think I changed my mind?

1 Doesn't matter. I was mistaken.

She flushed in the privacy of her own bedroom.

1 Or was I?

She rushed to type an answer.

0 No.

0 Yes.

She laughed at herself.

0 No, I didn't change my mind. Yes, you were mistaken. 

0 I didn't understand what was taking you so long.

She watched that cursor blink for a long time.

1 A lot has happened since the picnic. I didn't want to assume a status quo.

Yana didn't notice it when she stood from the chair and stepped to the bed. She just laid down on her back, on top of the covers, and stared up at the screen as if it were his face.

And with his face came a host of memories. They may not have had many direct conversations, but Yana's job forced her to get to know a lot of people on base, most of the time in ways and with secrets she could never admit she knew. From behind the veil of security cameras and correspondence, Yana knew Wedge as well as she did almost every other pilot.

'Not assuming a status quo' was not exactly Antilles style.

0 You don't strike me as one who gets trigger shy about stuff like that.

1 Yeah. That's true. But I'm trying to do it different now.

0 Oh? Why?

 _Please don't say something corny._ There was a slightly longer pause before he answered.

1 War's over.

1 My expected life span just went into hyperspace.

Yana's brows knitted, and she almost tried to speak. She typed instead.

0 What does that have to do with comming me?

1 I don't have to worry about leaving anyone behind anymore.

1 I have time to do it different now.

1 To do it right.

That was not what she expected him to say. Yana began to warn herself that this may well be just the super smooth pilot prowl she feared she'd fall victim to. And yet, she was already a victim to it even if it was.

0 Sounds like you've already mapped out a mission plan.

It was supposed to be a little joke, but she realized it probably didn't sound like that as he read it.

1 So far the only plan was to find a way to talk to you in a way that you could talk back. Like I said, I didn't want to be the only one conversation-.

0 It's a good idea. I don't know why I didn't think of it.

1 Because the ball was in my court.

Yana smiled softly, imagining his voice to match the words. She wished she could talk so they could have this conversation face to face, but curled up in bed in her pjs, typing on a secured link with only two channels, somehow this felt even more intimate.

1 So how was your day?

Her voice seeped out when she smiled at that.

0 It's much better now. How was yours?

1 I'm surrounded by palpy jackasses, and I have to be nice to them!

Yana giggled like a school girl

And a chat commenced...

Nothing big got said, but everything said felt big anyway. After two hours of simple small talk, no pressing issues, no invasive questions, no political comments of any kind (save that Imperials were a pain in the ass) Yana finally typed that she had to get ready for bed. His answer:

1 Can I link you tomorrow?

0 Please.

Her mouth almost whispered the whole word without a hitch as she typed it. She only realized afterwards how smoothly the word had tumbled out of her mouth.

1 :)

She giggled again, smiling up at the dimly glowing screen as if it was his smiling face.

0 :)

0 Good night.

1 Sleep well.

He never said his name, but neither did she. It was like their own little secret. She was sure it was him just by all the flying metaphors and pilot lingo. But also, the humor in his tone matched the man she knew. He knew what Wedge would know, and he didn't know things that Wedge wouldn't.

She watched the datalink go through its commands to wipe the entire conversation from its memory, and Yana switched it off. She hugged the little machine to her chest and stared up at the ceiling...

...and tried it again.

"Pees-" she couldn't get the L to work. "P-eas."

She huffed in frustration, and sobered. She reached to set the datalink aside, but missed the bedside table and it tumbled to the floor. "Fuck," she whispered. Another smooth, un-fumbling, un-stuttered word.

She thought about that as she finally climbed into bed and began a series of testing herself by saying things she saw in the room. "C-c-c-c-" It was supposed to be chrono. No luck there. _How about 'hand'._ "HHHhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaa-aaa- " The n was being trouble. "Haaa- ** _nd_** _h_."

 _Whew. At least I got it out. Okay, let's try 'data'._

"Ds... ds... d-" _Come on, open mouth after the 'd'_. "Dt-" Big sigh. _No luck there. So let's go back._

"Pease... Pppppease..." _Almost. Keep trying._ "Pwease." She growled at the ceiling and hissed. "Fuck!"

She screamed in her mind and laughed at herself. _Why is that the only word I can say?!_

She dropped her fists to her sides on the bed in defeat and sniggered a little, then her mind found a new idea.

She decided to try a whole new word she had not yet ever tried.

She thought of the word and focused on it in her mind. She saw the text of the word. She heard the word. Her heart swelled at the word. Her eyes imagined the physical representation of the word. And she let all of it soak into her soul like her heart was a sponge and he was water.

Her eyes gently closed, her mouth relaxed and she let it fall naturally from her lips. "Wedge."

Not a hitch. Not a hesitation. Not a stutter. Not a pause. Just that simple, pure word and all the handsome stuff behind it. Her mouth smiled from ear to ear. At her success, and even more so at the humor that he would be one of the few words in her vocabulary that she could say out loud.

She didn't want to push it too far, else she force herself into stuttering on that one too, but she wanted to hear her own voice one more time. She'd missed it-her own voice. So she closed her eyes and relaxed again, and let it tumble from her lips like a dream.

"Wedge..."


	29. LL6 28 Leia's Offer

It was a productive meeting. The Senator of Orinda was a respectful and quiet man, as was his entire delegation, and his request to move his assigned Senate seat away from the exuberant and argumentative Dorians was understandable and easy to approve. Leia escorted him out of her office and shared a bow, after which the gentlemen took a tiny step forward and took her hand with fatherly kindness.

"It is not my place, but I'd to share a thought," he offered.

Leia bowed her chin. That's what she was here for.

"Myself and all of Orinda is delighted to congratulate you on your forthcoming child as we are equally saddened by the loss of your husband."

Leia braced herself, and bowed her chin with respect.

"However, I implore you to consider the rules of the original Senate in the Old Republic on that matter. If you recall, those species whom culturally raised their own offspring were not permitted Senate seats for a distinctive reason. The Senate is like a room full of children," he grinned. "We are time-consuming and demanding of constant attention. And anyone needing to jungle that responsibility with one's own true offspring to raise..."

Leia gestured one hand and pulled her other away from his gentle grip. "I understand."

He angled his head. "My Lord, please understand, there is nothing I would rather more than have you on that spire until the end of time. But the deepest purpose of government is to better the galaxy for the next generation, and yet that project is never nearly as important as bettering the next generation themselves."

"Your words are very kind."

"I am simply ask you to consider whom you might endorse as your replacement when the time comes to for you to step down for higher and more important life-term aspirations."

Leia nodded once more, this time deeper in chin, this time with her dark eyes aimed at him to say this discussion is over. "I thank you for your council."

The senator took the hint, snapped his heels with an Imperial bow, and turned to go.

At the desk beside them, Winter heard the whole thing. She sat with hands in her lap and eyes up, waiting in silence in case of instruction or question.

Leia turned and pressed open palms on the desktop, as she did often to pause for thought between meetings. Move made her bend over at the waist, but this time the fast-growing weight of her belly added a level of discomfort-a reminder-to this particular moment of rest.

As much as she dismissed his advice the moment it came out of his mouth, the issue he was trying to make her address refused to be ignored.

 _Poke_.

Leia put a palm on her belly. It felt like a bowl movement trying to shove its way through her pipes. It felt like gas, or a little rock trying to snake around her large intestine, like she had eaten something that-

 _Poooooooke... Poke. Poke._

A smile flashed across her face. Her hand could almost feel the kick all the way through the skin to her palm.

Winter's eyes went from Leia's face, to her palm, and back up. For once, Winter shattered her usually stoic demeanor and smiled too.

Leia considered this development. And considered the timing of the Senator's advice. One thing was for certain, if he was thinking about how much she needed to step down to raise Breha, hundreds of others were thinking about it too.

 _Poke_.

And it seemed even tiny Breha had something to say about it as well.

If the Force was trying to tell her anything, it was telling her that it was high time to start rounding up help with the 'mother' part of her duties.

With one palm on her belly, staring at the air, she sat down in Winter's guest chair, thinking. She noticed how she instinctively sat down back first so she wouldn't have to bend forward, how she rested back in the chair instead of sitting up in prim and proper fashion, and how Breha continued to gently nudge at her bladder.

Now she had to pee.

After a moment of deep consideration, Leia pushed at the arm of the chair to return to her feet. Instead of saying the instruction aloud, she swiveled the text-comm on Winter's desk and typed the request. She didn't want anyone to hear it. And she watched Winter's expression as the white-haired woman read the idea.

Winter's face at first was a tiny shock, perhaps confusion, until she realized the connection, at which her mouth spread a secret, understanding smile. With a slow blink, she bowed her chin and moved to her contact list.

Leia went to the restroom as she thought hard about this. She returned to her empty office and sat down in the big chair feeling very small, hunched with the weight of responsibility, staring at the floor. This was either a great idea or a very, very bad one.

The comm screen lifted from the flat of her desk and a face flickered into full color. Leia easily recognized the bright sun and blonde background of a plant she knew more about than she spent time on.

They had met once, but it was during a stressful moment in which no connection could be possible. The pale face on the screen was gaunt with lack of sleep. Her trim cut dark hair a slight fray from the day. Brown eyes were bloodshot. But Gina Lendra looked at the screen with defiant strength as though she had expected this to be a prank call.

For a split second, Gina looked a little overwhelmed that she was wrong, but she then looked entirely displeased. for Gina must have assumed, as everyone else in the galaxy did, which side of certain debates Leia would land upon.

"Lord Chamberlain." It was a terse greeting.

Leia folded her elbows on the desktop and smiled warmly, "Call me Leia."

"Wel- I'm-" Gina cleared her throat and a heat of anger settled in her eyes. She aimed them directly at Leia. "What do you want?"

"I comm in peace," Leia assured. "The contents of this call, and the sheer fact that I'm making it, are completely confidential."

Gina flattened her mouth with disbelief and settled back in her chair with a tested sigh.

"From _all_ the family members," Leia added.

Gina seemed torn to believe that. "What do you want?" Her thoughts were clear on her face. _I don't need this complication right now!_

"First of all, I thought you should know that Nik is on Coruscant. He's staying with Kess and Luke and they are helping him through whatever it is that he's needing help with." She lightened her tone to point out, "I do not know what that is. Nor is it any of my business. But from what little I did overhear, it sounded like you hadn't been informed of his whereabouts, so I thought you should know."

This seemed to ease a fraction of Gina's worries. "Um, thank you? I guess?"

Leia's eyes smiled to point out. "I did promise to keep you apprised of his whereabouts. I didn't assume that promise had expired."

Gina softened a little and nodded. "Well, thank you. He told me where he was going before he left. I'm... I'm glad they're helping him."

Leia sat up a little when she was ready to address the other issue. "There is another reason I commed."

Gina rolled her eyes and closed them with tension.

"Now, here me out," Leia insisted with a palm. "I have an offer for you. And it's not what you probably think. It's not any kind of command, or a request, or even a _suggestion_. All I'm asking is that you hear me out."

Gina gathered herself and settled. "Okay...?"

"I don't know the depth of the situation, nor do I presume to. So my offer may be entirely off in wild space, and I accept that. But it's an idea that I wanted to share with you _in case_ it would provide a solution for you as well. If it can't, no problem, no one ever need know this comm call took place."

Eyes glared from under black brows.

" _No one_ ," Leia insisted with direct eyes.

Gina crossed her arms over her chest and held the outsides of her upper arms. "So, what is it?"

"Ben is seven?"

She nodded, huffing through her nose again.

"And he's had two cases of using the Force accidentally in as many months-

Gina sat up and already began shaking her head.

"Hear me out," Leia scolded, nearly lifting her voice to order it.

When Gina settled again, Leia settled too.

"There are ways to train a child to calm, understand, and _avoid_ accidental Force use. This has nothing to do with Jedi training and does not commit a child for life. It is, I'll admit, the first set of lessons any Force-user gets, but nothing says they can't stop training once those first level methods of recognition and avoidance are in practice."

Gina sat up and argued immediately. "Do you really think you're going to convince me that Luke or Kess would let him go after that? That they're not going to try and persuade him to -

Leia lifted a new palm and gave the woman an impatient glare of her own. Once Gina shut up, Leia explained. "Clearly, you don't know Luke or Kess at all because of course they wouldn't, but that aside... The reason _I'm_ calling you is because _it doesn't have to be_ Luke or Kess that trains Ben these very simple techniques."

Gina's eyes began to search the air for a third Jedi somewhere, and just before she blurted a question, she realized again to whom she was speaking.

Her eyes shifted, and they narrowed. "But you're not a Jedi."

"My point exactly," Leia said, eyes and tone bright. "I don't own a lightsaber. I can't levitate things across the room. I'm not going to run out on some face-off somewhere. No dangerous missions for me. What I _do_ have is years of practice in the basic coping skills. And since that's all Ben really needs to learn..."

To this, Gina's chin twisted on the insanity of this. "You're the _Lord Chamberlain_ though."

"Yes. And, yes, I am very busy. And, yes, I have to stay on Coruscant. But that said, Kess is about to be my family, and no matter what happens between you and Nik, that means Ben is a about to be my family too."

Gina sobered to realize this connection.

" I don't know if you noticed, Gina, but we're running out of family around here."

"Yeah um." Gina looked at her lap. "My condolences on your husband."

"I thank you for your condolences, but..." she sighed slow and gathered her thoughts. "Truth is, my husband is gone. My brother and his fiancé are as busy as I am. My parents are gone, all my extended family... And none of my work friends here, political or otherwise, either never had any children, or don't raise them themselves anyway." Leia naturally sighed to calm the emotion welling up, but then she just let it well up so that Gina could see it. "Gina, I'm four months pregnant... I could really use someone around who has been through this... Someone who can help me keep it all in perspective."

Gina blinked over big brown eyes.

Leia shook her head and smiled through her own overwhelmed sadness. "As disconnected as you and I are, you are the only family I have that has been a mother."

Gina swallowed hard and dropped her mouth open. "Wow... Um..."

Leia tried to smile, "Like I said, it's just an idea. Stay with me on Coruscant for a few months or a year. Let me teach Ben what I know about how to handle what's happening to him, and in return you can teach me how to... _face this_. When you're comfortable Ben knows what he needs, then you can go home and take Ben with you." She flattened her mouth with the simplicity of it and shrugged.

"And the others?"

"Well, I have gleaned there are some marital issues going on. It's none of my business and I'm not going to pry. But I will make you two promises on that topic. One, if you do come, I am going to tell them you're here. But that's it. The other promise is that I will not deliberately or accidentally facilitate a meeting or comm call with anyone unless you expressly ask for it."

"Can you really make that promise?"

"What do you mean?"

"How can you keep secrets from Luke Skywalker?"

Leia blinked and smiled big, "Many years of practice."

Gina began to show a hint of humor.

"Yes, he is my brother and he's a Jedi Master, but he also knows I am not beholden to supply him with any information about anything, _ever_. Trust me-this is a non-issue."

Gina eyed the table top for a moment, and her eyes shifted to the screen with wavering distrust.

Leia smiled more and gestured in the air. "I have a huge suite at the top of this big tower and all I've got is a Wookiee, a protocol droid, and a bodyguard to keep me company up there. I'm going crazy in that big empty place. And I need some noise. I need some company. Especially with Han gone and Breha on the way."

"How are you going to prevent an accidental meeting if they decide to show up for dinner or something?"

Leia looked at her like she was nuts. "I'm the Lord Chamberlain. If you think the security around me and my house right now isn't three parsecs thick-

"No, what I meant was- "

Leia stressed it comically, "Gina, _I'm the Lord Chamberlain!_ **_No one_** shows up unannounced! That's part of my problem!"

Gina seemed uncertain, but she wasn't angry or distrustful anymore. "I'll think about it."

"That's all I ask. And I'll say it again, unless you say yes, no one will know this offer ever happened."

"Thank you for that."

Leia nodded. "Thank you for hearing me out. May the Force be with you."

Gina started the rote response, and grinned with inward irony when she realized what she was going to say, yet she said it anyway, "May the Force be with you."

 _Click._

Leia fell back in her desk chair to think deeply. One hand fidgeted with the tips of her fingernails, the other patted her belly. The poking had settled, but Breha had made her opinions known. Leia felt a little guilty for expressing that much truth and emotion to a stranger, but by Gina's reaction to it, Leia was glad to know the tactic worked. It probably wouldn't have worked so well if it wasn't true, but that didn't make Leia fell any better about sharing such personal thoughts she so religiously hid from the galaxy.

In a way, this was a political move. Teaching young Ben some coping skills just may prevent another Empire from rising again in 30 years. Leia was devout in her promise to keep the rest of the family out of it, if that's what Gina chose, for if shielding the boy from the Jedi Academy and its cohorts was what it took for Gina to get Ben the help he needed, then the Jedi Academy and its cohorts could kiss her royal ass if they got upset about Leia's protection of the mother and son.

Leia pushed wearily to sit up to her desk, scratched the bridge of her nose, and tapped the intercom to Winter. "What's next."


	30. LL6 29 The Next Level

W I got an apartment in Coco Town near the base. First time I haven't had a roommate in years. It's weird.

Y But it's still better than having roommates, right? I hate my new ones.

W Where do you live now?

Y I'm still in the complex they dumped us all in right after the battle.

W How come you haven't set up a new place yet?

Y Not sure if I'm going to stay on Coruscant.

There was a pregnant pause after that. Yana suspecting it was because he was typing a full speech to respond. She predicted the argument, but let him finish.

W Why?

She squinted a strange grin. _Why did it take you so long to type that?_

Y Because if I get the implant, I can't work as a data admin anymore. I'll have to find a new career. It might not be here.

W There's no way you can get the implant and keep your career?

Y No. Data admins cannot have any risk of being compromised. Implants are programmable.

W I want to hear your voice again but I vote not getting the implant if that's what it means for you to stay.

 _You're just being nice because you want to get laid_ , she thought. But she couldn't make herself stop this easy chatting on the datalinks every night. The only thing they did to program it further was assigning the handles of their first initials. Otherwise, it was a barebones linkup.

She hadn't even talked to him outside of the link yet, and they'd been talking for over a week now, almost every night, often for hours. The only assurances she had that it was Wedge Antilles on the other end was that he didn't ask things that Wedge Antilles would not to ask, such as details of her workday. He didn't ask things that Wedge Antilles would already know, such as personal information or status of the Jedi and how the wedding plans _weren't_ coming along because the Jedi just didn't have time for that kind of fodder right now. And he knew all the things Wedge Antilles would know, such as who was who in the Rebellion, but not having all the important Imperials on the newsnets quite memorized yet.

Yana knew most of the spy craft tricks because it was part of her job to detect them. Even if it wasn't Wedge on the other end, this guy didn't know _any_ spy craft.

Yana liked Wedge. She liked him a lot. And she wasn't sure why. He was a pilot. She kept trying to remind herself of that. Somehow it felt safer talking to him with this solid physical barrier between them. But she also knew that he was just another pilot. Wedge probably didn't realize it, but this data admin with top secret clearance on Yavin 4 had already sorted through plenty of random, local, rumor-mill-type data to see the evidence that Wedge Antilles was 'not looking for anything serious'.

And Yana was not looking for anything temporary.

So Yana decided she should probably break it to him sooner than later that she had no intentions of having a sexual relationship with a pilot. She shouldn't have waited this long, but it was time to drop the bomb.

She began to type-

W Wanna go out sometime?

Her heart thumped against her chest. Even if it was a ploy, her soul still swelled at the offer. She tried to keep her wits about her, tried to keep the usual Pilot-smooth antics from winning her over, but somehow his still worked. And he only had the reach of a datalink.

She was too wise to say yes, but she couldn't bring herself to say no. She struggled to decide.

W Too soon?

She chuckled and typed quickly, just to enter something.

Y No.

Y Yes.

W ?

Y No, not too soon. Yes, I would like that.

 _Oh crap,_ she thought. _He got to you. You let him get to you. You let your shields down and he's flying right in._

W :)

"Fuck," she cursed at herself, laughing through one of two smooth words she could say out loud. Her cheeks pinked to look at that tiny two digit face smiling at her. Her heart flushed as her mind screamed. _You were just reminding yourself the hard evidence you've seen about this guy! You were just reminding yourself why you don't date pilots! And you caved! Instantly! You caved!_

W How about Benduday?

She put her palm over her mouth and tried to breathe.

Y Benduday's good.

They both paused for a long time after that.

W Want to do anything specific?

Y Like what?

W I don't know. That's why I'm asking you. Ha ha.

Y You asked, you pick. 

_You're in for it now_ , she sighed.

As shy as she was, as little as she dated in recent years, Yana was very observant about the follies and successes of others. First dates often set the tone of what kind of relationship it would be. _Not_ giving the man clues was the best way to determine what he really wanted. The conservative ones who were in it for the traditional long haul would try to take you to church, or a fair, or the zoo. The seedy ones who wanted to get in your pants would take you to dinner and drinks. The ones in a real hurry to get laid would take you to _just_ drinks.

Yana had yet to hear of a first date in which the gentleman actually did some research and chose a type of event in which the lady would be independently interested. (She heard of one who took his first date to a gentleman's club, as if the stripping dancers on a pole were supposed to give the first date ideas on what to do next... That didn't end well.)

Generally, the time of day they wanted to meet up was telltale by itself. The later the start of the date, the more likely they were going to try to get frisky at the early morning end of it. Finally, the ones who weren't sure about you either would take you to a function where other friends would be so neither of you had to face each other the whole evening. Yana suspected that last one was going to be Wedge's choice.

Y Should I wear anything specific? Dress up? Dress down?

W I don't know what we're doing yet. Lemme think on it. I'll let you know.

W But probably not.

W Antique Fair? Zoo? Owshka Square? Can give me a hint?

Yana closed her eyes and sighed with disappointment. Although they had few direct interactions, Yana and Wedge had been acquaintances for years. And the Rebellion was a small circle of whispers when it came to who was cheating on who. Yana knew full well that Wedge wasn't a Church/Fair/Zoo First Date kind of guy. At the same time, she knew of enough of his exploits to know he wasn't new to this game either. Yana suspected he was trying to pull the wool over her eyes with a trick _pretending_ to be in it for the long haul.

And yet she still wanted this date. Yana cussed herself silently, admitting it. Wedge was _really good_ at the Pilot-smooth antics.

W Would you rather dinner and drinks?

 _No, but not for the reasons you think._ The truth was that Yana didn't care what they did. What she cared about was some clue if this was real or not. Her humor flattened, but he couldn't see that through her typed words.

Y Anything you want.

 _Shit!_ She thought, realizing how that could have been taken as an open invitation for the very thing she didn't want. She scrambled to think of something to say to backtrack it, but he typed first.

W Okay. I'll think of something. 

W And I'll be sure to have you home before you turn into a pumpkin.

Grinning at the text, Yana began to breathe again. She settled deeper into her squeaky bed and shined green eyes up at the screen...

Y What time on Benduday?

...and the screen sent a dim glow down onto his shining brown eyes. Most of the lights were off. Wedge's apartment in the under levels got very dark if he didn't have them on. But he didn't notice because his face smiled up at that glowing little screen like he was talking to an angel.

He considered her question a moment, and typed.

W 1000?

"Because whatever the hell I figure out," he murmured aloud, "it sure as hell ain't going to be dinner and drinks."

W I have something to show you.

"Shit!" He hissed and sat up in a rush, trying to figure out how to roll back his words before she took it wrong.

Y Can't see through a datalink. Sorry. :)

Wedge chortled to read her words.

W Nothing inappropriate. I promise.

Y Ok.

"By the Force, I wish I could see your expressions through this thing." His breath exhaled and his chest deflated. He shook his head and whispered. "Please see that I'm being real. Please see that."

Y Kess and Luke still don't know about this. Do they?

His grin grew again.

W No.

W I didn't want you think I was doing this because they told me to.

Y Did they tell you to?

W They're bugging me pretty hard to comm you.

Y Still? We've been talking for over a week. You don't want them to get off your back? 

He grinned to say it as he typed it.

W Nope.

Y ?

Wedge wasn't sure how to explain this, even to her. He considered it a long moment before trying.

W I'd rather have them bitch at me about comming you than bugging me to learn how it went.

Y Good point.

W Benduday. 10 morning. Everyday clothes.

Y It's a date.

Wedge smiled from ear to ear.

Y Good night.

W Sleep tight.

Y _logged off_

He let the data link drop to his chest and stared up at the blackness of his ceiling. He let himself get a little nervous, a little hopeful, and a little giddy, but then he sighed hard and settled with maturity and wisdom.

He whispered the words he so often heard through the comm in his ear, the words that made him sober up and settled down, and concentrate to get the job done right the first time.

"Maze test, level 2. Commencing in . . . three days."


	31. LL6 30 Confessions

The Jedi Temple. Chewie hadn't recorded any of the trip in the _Falcon_ when they were down there for the Plan Cresh mission, but the experienced pilot did remember a bit of the journey to sketch out a draft. Yana wasn't able to scrounge much from historical record, but she did manage to find a few bits of ancient museum-trapped blue prints no one believed were still accurate. Luke managed a Force-Persuade on an Imperial data admin to hand over the last of the collection from the Jedi Temple Library, but only ended up with a fraction of what it likely once was, and every report in the packet were already-released records, clearly altered to be used as Palapatine propaganda. The only thing they knew for sure were the number of conflicts and raids that had happened since the fall of the Jedi. There were more than enough records of looters, saboteurs, and surviving supporters to blow things up or move things around since any of these records were captured.

Kess gathered all of this and tried to piece together the reality down there, but it was like building a whole fighter with only four bolts and a bottle of fuel. The truth was they had to be ready for anything, a complete and untouched treasure trove of information, or an empty cavern over a pile of rubble. There were certainly going to be disturbing symbols of all that death, and very likely a booby trap or two.

What was worse was that everyone now thought the remaining levels of Jedi Temple were haunted. They had a good reason for it. It gave her hope that this meant few people had been down there to stir things up further, but her hope diminished when she found the superstition to be the cause of _everyone_ declining to help explore it.

The local police force laughed at her. History universities declared it too dangerous. Architects didn't care what it was now, only what it was _then_ , and they had those records already. Those who swayed toward the Imperial political party didn't want them digging any more Jedi stuff up. Those who swayed toward the Alliance political party wished them the best of luck, but were too busy with their new lives and new duties to take the amount of time they would need to be useful.

In the end, Kess had to admit the first order of business was to try and figure out why the Nice Man in Tayla's Head told the girl to go down there in the first place. The archaeology of it would have to be delayed until the New Jedi Order had enough staff and students to take on a full and proper excavation project.

Which meant they needed staff, and they needed students. Which meant they needed the Academy up and running. Which meant they needed the structures built. Which meant they needed the infrastructure approved...

Feeling like an utter failure in this project, she stepped into Luke's office when he had poked in between mediations. She sat down in the guest chair in front of his desk with a heavy sigh.

Luke's eyes flicked up toward the mood he sensed. His hands stopped shuffling datafolios and folded his fingers together to give her his guarded attention.

She didn't even bother to explain. She just tossed her notes onto his desktop and angled her head. "Let me just take Tayla down there myself and figure out what's going on."

His brow arched. "Are you asking me _permission_?"

She inhaled, but kept it in her lungs as she thought about it. Kess realized she had, by default, asked him his permission, when she really shouldn't have just told him what she planned to do. Feeling defeated even more now, she let the air out of her lungs and slumped back in the chair.

Luke chuckled sympathetically as he swiveled his chair away to another set of notes, "Y'know, I have half a mind to send you down to Wedge to rebuild your confidence."

Kess blinked. Her shifted her eyes over.

"I'm sure he has something down there you can fix," he added off-handedly.

"Oh." Kess murmured, understanding his comment now.

Luke didn't look up from his work, his voice was all too easy, but his Force swelled with anger. "Why? What did you think I was talking about?"

"Nothing," she said quickly and pushed out of the chair to go.

Luke's hard eyes slid to watch her back as she left and were still on her when she stopped at the door and turned, bracing herself for the answer to this question.

"If it _was_ a matter of permission, what would you say?" She was daring him, already angry at him for the answer she suspected. She was challenging him to say it to her face that he didn't trust her.

He considered her a long moment and lounged against the arm of his chair to look her deeper in the eyes with this honest truth, "I'd say no." He shook his head gently. "But for not for the reasons you think." It didn't matter. He could feel the flare coming out of her the moment his answer erupted from his mouth.

She shifted her feet, clearly keeping her old repair-grunt temper from spouting, but faced it. "Why then?"

Blue eyes shined to admit it. "Only because I want to see it too."

To that, she grinned back, nodded at the floor, and shifted to go.

"Kess?" She had paused in the doorway, but Luke stared at an empty spot on the wall as he tried to think this through. This was an emotional question, not a logical one. And he recognized the question was fueled by his dark-sided fear of the unknown.

She sensed it too. After a beat of nothing, she took a tiny step in and thumbed the office door to close. "You okay?"

His eyes flicked up to stare at her, to fear to ask, but he had already meditated as much away as it was going to get. And in this, it had nothing to do with being Jedi. Luke reached for his hip, unlatched the lightsaber, and propped it on the desktop, symbolically setting that subject aside.

Guarded anew, Kess watched this. Her mouth worked to remain emotionless, her concentrations kept her calm, but she knew full well that he already knew the guilt and fear seeping out of her soul.

 _Busted._

She faced it like a soldier. Deliberately, she unlatched her lightsaber and propped it on the desktop as well, eye meeting eye, ready for the worst.

The comm crackled. "Luke. The Findans are here."

Luke kept the hard stare as his finger snapped the desktop comm. "Be there in a minute."

They should probably talk about this later, but it was too late now.

Kess set her feet apart, locked her knees, and crossed her arms at her chest. She nearly hissed it. "Should I be standing at attention?"

" _No_." He spat with a deep whine in that little word. "Isn't that part of our problem?" His brows knitted with annoyance as he pushed out of his chair. "How did you say it before?" He stepped around and leaned his butt against the front of the desk to face her down and quote her, "I'm not your father and I'm not your commanding officer, and I have no right to give or deny permission for someone to ask you out on a date."

Kess scrunched her face and cussed under her breath. She tried to save this with a dark humor. "Well, you were at the time-

"I'm not now." He interrupted her.

Finally, she shook her head and sighed. "Why are you pissed at me?"

"Because you don't keep secrets very well," he whispered. "I was joking before... about sending you down to Division One just to fix something." He watched her mouth ripple and rub with guilt, and he shook his head. "But you're confidence isn't shaky because of what's going on around here. You're not trying to get Wedge and Yana together because you promised Kayla and Joanne."

He glared at her so hard that her brown eyes couldn't tear away. She couldn't even blink.

"You're _guilty_ ," he accused quietly, shaking his head, "for more than I know about."

Tears welled up on her lashes.

And now his soul soured too.

But they stared at each other, in pain, untrusting, and unsure where to go with this next.

Finally, Luke broke the stare and shifted his eyes to the floor. "If you need to tell me something, Kess, can you at least do it before we get married?"

She let out a breath so painful a wisp of voice seeped out with it. "I- I don't have anything to-"

"Don't lie to me," he whispered.

She bit her lower lip and struggled.

"Guilt is on the dark side," he said, lifting his face, but his face was pained. "And you need to find a way to come clean. That guilt is growing. And now it's diminishing your confidence in your Jedi duties. And it's spoiling every pure moment you and I should be having to get ready for this wedding."

Kess closed her eyes and took several steps backward until she landed against the far wall in defeat.

Luke's voice ascended in harmonies of pain and anger. "And I don't know if you need to confess to _me_ , or confess to _Yana_ , or clear it up one-on-one with Wedge, but you'd better do _something_ to sort this out!"

Her brow knitted at him. "You're talking like I slept with him!"

"Did you?"

Her mouth fell open with shock.

Luke said it before he thought about it, but then he realized it was the real question he still hadn't found a convincing enough answer to could settle the matter within himself.

She met his glare with strength and clarity. " _No_."

He closed his mouth and read every clue he could sense to determine if she was telling the truth.

Now, it was her voice that was cool and even. "Why would you ask me that?"

A tongue went into his molar. A stiff sigh escaped his nose.

Kess's brow lifted. "Maybe it's _you_ who needs to do a little confessing, huh? Your jealousy streaks are getting way out of hand-

He launched to his feet, "Don't try to turn this on me-

She shouted back. "Then start telling me what the hell you're talking about!"

Toe to toe again, he set his hands on his hips and hissed at her. "You spike. Every time Wedge comes up in conversation, your guilt _spikes_. Every time he's around, your defenses go up... like you're trying to protect yourself from something. Like you're trying to _hide_ something."

She rolled her eyes away-

But he shouted back, "So yes! I admit it! I get a little jealous because I can't understand how can plan to marry _me_ when you're keeping a piece in reserve for _him_!"

She put her palms on her cheeks, then moved them to cover her nose and open mouth. There was no getting out of this. There was no way to solve his concerns and admit the truth at the same time.

Kess tried to plea it gently. "Luke, I'm not keeping anything in reserve for anyone."

"Then why does your guilt spike like that?" He accused.

She swallowed hard.

 _"What don't I know?"_

Kess rubbed her lips, and she knew this was going to be hard, but she recognized there was no way out of it. She rubbed her lips again, sighed, and lifted her chin. "The night before the launch, when we were getting ready to leave Pad 14, shutting out the lights for the last time, we um... we said goodbye." She popped a nervous shrug. "And there was a kiss in it." Tears welled up again, but she forced herself to face him down with this. "Unplanned, un-premeditated... An accident, if you will... Shocked us both, I think... and we both," she lifted both palms in the air in the motion to back off. "But it was just a goodbye."

Luke didn't react like she expected him too. He seemed calmer about it. He stared for a moment before shrugging too. And his voice was shaky. "How did you say 'hello'?"

Kess gave him a genuine grin to that. "There wasn't a 'hello'. Not like that." Her eyes were genuine and honest now. "I never met him until the day I reported into Rogue Group under _your_ command... By then, I was already _yours_."

Blue eyes stared back, pained.

She shrugged again, "And you already knew that. _I_ was the only one that didn't."

"You're trying to say it was _my_ fault?" He reacted with emotion instead of peace.

"No! God!" She put her palms over face, over her eyes, to catch the tears.

Luke dropped his pained sights to the floor. He realized he shouldn't have said that, but he wasn't ready to apologize for it either.

She sniffed and looked away.

Alone in the room, uninterrupted, standing only feet from each other, Luke and Kess felt parsecs apart.

But Kess lifted her chin and faced him down. Luke was mildly surprised, and more than a little humbled, when she handled this like a Jedi.

"I _am_ sorry," she said with bold eyes and soft words. "You're right; there is residual guilt from it. But the guilt comes from the worry of hurting you, that you wouldn't understand it wasn't a 'pass', or an 'offer', or anything like that... that you wouldn't be able to trust me if you found out." She looked at him hard and shook her head. "The guilt has nothing to do with Wedge himself. Seeing him and hearing his name simply reminds me of my mistake. That's all."

Luke wanted to believe her. He wasn't sure why he didn't.

And she could see that he didn't, so her guilt raged like storm. She wanted to get angry. She wanted to throw a hand tool at something. She wanted to yell at him. But she trapped it all and maintained a sadly calm demeanor. "I should go meditate-

She almost told him to do the same, but she had no right to order him around on this one. She turned to leave.

"If you're going to talk to someone about this," he said quickly before she opened the door, and his voice was a warning, "Don't go to Yana." His eyes lifted up. "And _don't_ go to Wedge."

Kess swiveled on her heels to face him down with snarky anger, "Have I your Lordship's permission to lean on _my brother_?"

He flattened his mouth. His anger spiked. His lips rippled.

"No," she decided for him, "On second thought, I think it best I leave Nik free for you."

With a flat-mouthed glare at him, Kess sucked her lightsaber into her palm through the air, and latched it back to her hip as she turned on her heels.

"Instead, I'll take my confessions to _Leia_."


	32. LL6 31 Tea and Pie

Kess didn't go to Leia to talk about it. In fact, she didn't go to anyone. She wandered that way before she left the Senate Dome, but talked herself into believing that Leia was either too busy or didn't need this complication right now. She thought to talk to Nik, but she didn't want to have to explain the whole thing. She kind of wanted to talk to Yana, but that would mean admitting what happened, and she didn't want to add anymore uncertainty between Yana and Wedge.

In truth, the one she really wanted to talk to about this was Wedge. He was one of her oldest friends now, and he was Luke's best friend. Wedge would be the one person who would know how to advise her. But Luke was right; it would be wrong to go to Wedge simply because he was the co-conspirator.

She left the speeder behind so Luke could use it later and hopped the first public transit she found, just to get away from the political sector. She didn't really pay attention to which direction it was going, and she didn't pay attention to how far it went before she looked up to find she didn't know where she was. It was late afternoon by the time she decided not to travel too far away from home and climbed off the bus with a small pouring of other random people.

It was an unremarkable section of the city, mostly industrial, with a smattering of low-income housing and dingy shops. Not on the top level, but not in the depths either. This area was sort of a ledge between the high class and the underworks, a wide surface street cut between an immense cavern and taller factories. She had no idea where she was, but she wasn't worried, she'd find her way back when the time came.

At least she was away from it all.

She had grabbed her brown cloak and now pulled the cowl over her head to keep people from wanting to approach and chat. Wrapping the thick wool over her front hid her lightsaber so no one would recognize her that way either. Kess just wanted to be alone right now. She wished she could go to the clearing for it, and realized that somehow, they had to find a new clearing. They both needed a place to get away and think.

She should at least tell Nik or Tayla where she was; she'd turned off her commlink when she left. She wasn't hungry, yet she absently pulled into a tiny diner on the side of the street to sit for a java juice with the intent to report in to someone.

Greasy workers and retirees peppered the establishment with conversation. Kess sat down in the first empty booth she found and grinned at how the ancient red-plastic upholstery groaned under her weight. The server droid yelled out orders through the kitchen window at a skinny, shirt-stained cook standing unflinching in his sprays of grease. This place was a real dive.

It was perfect.

After a moment, Kess looked around to see if she was supposed to wait for the server droid to come to the table, or if she was supposed to order at the counter to order. Her attentions caught on an elderly and massive besalisk man sitting in the corner of the bar counter like a regular, but Kess only recognized the race by the four giant arms and frog-like facial features. She'd never met one before. They were supposed to look intimidating, but this old man chuckled deeply and smiled with bright eyes at one of the waiters. She overheard a bit of another conversation in the booth behind her; they were arguing about sports. And across the dining room, two ladies with seven fingers on each hand knitted as they complained about their daughter-in-laws.

Normal people. Kess grinned and pushed away her cowl to look the place over again. Maybe what she needed was not a clearing in a jungle as much as a place where normal people gathered with normal-people problems.

The waitress droid sped by on her uni-wheel, ignoring Kess entirely, and instead reported into the elderly basalisk customer. Kess was getting ready to raise a hand and ask for service when she caught the basalisk murmuring to the droid and pointing at _her_.

"You got it, honey." The waitress's accent sounded like sour milk. She rolled away to the kitchen.

As the basalisk grinned at Kess, Kess returned a wrinkled brow like he was nuts _. You're not trying to buy me a drink in order to pick me up are you?_ She wasn't sure how to respond to this suspicion, especially to watch the giant, green, four-armed geezer push off his stool like a man broken from decades of hard work and waddled over to her table with a dark-chuckling smile.

"Mind if I sit down?" He asked, but only after he was already squeezing his fat ass and pregnant belly between the booth and the table. Kess rolled her shoulders back and tried to find a polite way out of this. Before she found the right words, the waitress droid rolled up with stuff on her tray, setting down two small dishes: a cup of tea and a slice of tamal pie.

"I didn't order anything," Kess said with uncertainty.

"On the house," the basalisk announced and winked. Smugly, he set two of his four arms on the tabletop.

The waitress droid flipped a digit his way as she rolled off. "He owns the place."

Kess decided she must have been recognized, and there was a Jedi or political favor trying to get bought by a slice of tamal pie. Patiently, but ready to bolt as soon as she had the polite means to do so, she folded her hands into her lap and met the basalisk's eye. "What can I do for you?"

He just laughed more. His giant shoulders shuddered in the deep chuckle. "You can drink the ' _bloody tea'_." He said the last two words with a poor imitation of an inner rim accent.

Then he chuckled some more, as if Kess was the butt of some kind of joke.

Kess rolled her eyes and reached for the tea. Senses on, there was no deceit or ill-intent from this guy. "What do you want?" Kess challenged with a wisened grin, and took a sip.

It was the same kind of tea that grandpa used to drink.

"Don't want nothin'," he assured with a shrug, folding his huge fingers together on the table. "But I got a skill. Some say its kinda like a Jedi skill. I ain't no Jedi, but do have this skill."

Humored, Kess played along. "Okay? What's your skill?"

"When someone comes into my place needing to think, somehow I can sense what it is they need to eat and drink while they's thinkin'."

Kess looked down at the tea and tamal pie, and eyed him from underneath scrunched eyebrows. She wouldn't have ordered this as comfort food. This was more like the comfort food grandpa would've picked.

"I used to have some friends, long time ago, who would come in a lot. Not a lot. But a lot. When they needed to." He narrowed an eye and grinned with a quiet secret. "You kinda look like one of them."

She sighed for patience, "I'm sure you've seen me on the newsnets. You know who I am already."

"Yeah." He admitted, "But even if I didn't, I'd still recognize you." He nudged the tamal pie plate closer for her to partake in that as well.

Unwilling to get suckered into something, she didn't reach for it.

"So lemme guess," he said, squinting curiously, "And you don't have to tell me if I'm right, but lemme guess."

Kess lifted her brows and awaited this dare.

"You need somebody to talk to, but all your usuals aren't the right fit for this. The one you really want to talk to ain't around no more."

Kess licked grandpa's tea from her lips and lowered her eyes. It was eerie how that comment sucker punched her in the soul after she was so on-guard about this stranger. Her eyes flicked out the window.

"Like I said, you don't hafta tell me if I'm right." He shifted and it took a couple of tries to do it, but he wriggled his body out of the booth and groaned as he stood up. "But like I also said, you look like an old friend of mine."

Kess looked over at him, at where he was standing now, and getting ready to walk away. This was... surreal.

"Besides, you may as well make use of it." He chuckled again as he turned away, "I only kept that tea in stock for when Obi Wan came around anyway." And he waddled away.

Her sights fell back to the dinged-up table of tea and pie, but she couldn't see them clearly for the sudden tears in her eyes. To be sitting here, not far from what was grandpa's home before she knew him, accidentally visiting a place he frequented, that the owner remembered his favorite flavor of tea and favorite comfort food to go with it. It was like grandpa had reached out to say hello in a new way. This felt like a hug from the dead.

Kess ran a fingertip along the rim of the tea cup and smiled through her gentle tears. She flashed a smile, sniffed, and gazed out the window, trying to sense what grandpa's advice would be about all the things she had going on.

 _She could imagine his old voice, easy humor, and inner rim accent._ _Stop fretting about it for a minute and just eat the bloody pie._

Kess laughed, and though she knew it was her own memory excavating those words, she followed the order. Her mind was transported to other times and places, to younger struggles and older faces, and she grinned to taste that first reminiscent bite of tamal pie.


	33. LL6 32 Convergence

Every time was more difficult than the last, but Nik refused to give up hope that someday it might be different. Early in the afternoon, every day, he shooed the droids out of the office and sat down at the little terminal at the little cluttered desk, and tried to meditate for strength before he dialed a vidcomm.

He'd calculated the time zone difference dozens of times, so he knew they'd be home from school. The first few comms were picked up and hung up right away, followed by weeks of the comm buzzing at length before ending up in vidmail. He tried to leave message every time, but often found himself so angry that they didn't pick it that it wouldn't have been wise to do so.

Still, even if Gina wouldn't talk to him, at least she would know he was trying. Yet reminding himself of that purpose seemed less and less important as more calls went unanswered. Nik was ready to start scratching the tickmarks into the furniture like some fool stranded on a deserted island and counting the days of abandonment.

 _Diddle diddle bing... Diddle diddle bing... Diddle diddle b-_

"Hullow?" Ben's seven-year-old face flickered onto the screen. Blurry colors of blond hair and blue eyes. Sun-tanned white face. Baby cheeks. Ivory tunic.

Nik's heart exploded. He breathed a big smile. "Hey, scrapper! It's me. You're dad. How you doing?"

"Hi dad." He didn't seem affected by the sudden contact. "Where are you?"

"I'm... I'm with your Aunt Kess. Getting some help. I'm sorry I had to go away to get it."

"S'okay. Mom says you need it."

"I'm sure she does."

"She's outside with Miss Farad from next door."

"Oh. Okay. Good. It's good she's got friends to lean on."

"Miss Farad wants to buy the house."

 _Oh shit._ Nik thought. "Well, um, we'll sort that out later. How are you?"

"I'm good." He looked away before the house door opened up. "Here she comes. I'll go get her." Ben scurried away from the open vid comm.

"N-no!" Nik tried to stop the lad, but the boy was already gone. He watched the still image of his empty living room with lament. She rearranged some of the furniture. And the place was really clean. _Really_ clean.

Was she _trying_ to sell it?

In seconds, he heard Ben's voice again in the background, and Gina came storming up to the vidscreen. All he saw was a part of her body as she approached the desk chair.

Nik tried a smile. He tried to sound gentle and happy, but he sounded weak and begging, "Hey-

 _Click._

The screen went blank.

* * *

Wedge wasn't in a hurry to go home, even though it was payday Zhellday, because he knew Yana wouldn't get off work to be ready to chat for another couple of hours. As knock-off rattled over the loud speakers and crew rushed to leave for the weekend, Wedge stood at the window of the office and looked out over Division One's pad at his crew excited to go home.

"Looks like it's gonna be a hell of a party," Garyn murmured icily behind him.

Wedge almost glanced back-almost-but his eyes remained on the crew out there. Ommis and Janson had surrounded Jewie to playfully convince her to join them to where ever they were headed, probably promising Rogan wouldn't be there, even though Wedge knew he probably would be anyway.

Yet four of the Imperial-era pilots were also smiling as they strutted away from a different part of the pad, clearly ready to seek out their own Zhellday night festivities. Wedge wasn't sure which group Garyn was talking about, but it really didn't matter.

 _Twee twee tweet._ Wedge blindly pulled his commlink from his belt.

"See you Centaxday," Garyn said and turned to go home too, leaving him alone with his comm call.

Wedge ignored her and thumbed the link. "Antilles."

"Hey, it's me." He cleared his throat, "I need your help."

The voice was a man, familiar, but not instantly recognizable. Wedge's black brows scrunched over his nose. "Nik?"

"Yeah. You said I could comm you if I needed anything." His voice was rough, low. "You busy?"

Concerned, Wedge sat back down at his desk and gave the comm call his complete attention. "No. Not busy. What do you need?"

Nik seemed to struggled to say it. "I need to get out of here. Tayla's at her mom's tonight. Kess and Luke aren't home yet. And I just... I just can't do the Jedi thing today."

This seemed an odd request, but he couldn't blame the man. "What did you have in mind?"

"I don't know. I don't care. I just need to get away from this flat for a night. Y'know? Get out with real people. I'm going stir crazy in here."

"Yeah sure, man." Wedge thought to insist he wasn't going to take Nik drinking, but realized that this was probably the trouble Nik was trying to get himself into tonight. If Wedge demanded no drinking on the comm, Nik may hang up and seek out another potential enabler. Wedge decided quickly to help Jedi training in what rare capacity he could. It would be better to personally supervise Nik's escape to ensure there was no alcohol involved. "I'll come pick you up in a half."

"Great. Thanks." _Click._

Wedge thought on this for a moment. The Jedi regimen was sure to be suffocating, especially for a man struggling with all that Nik had on his plate. Wedge decided the best thing he could do was show Nik how to have a night off, and a night out, without drinking a sip - even if alcohol was everywhere.

But he needed a trustworthy team to make that work.

The Commander shoved out of his chair and stepped quickly out the office door to the pad, shouting. "Yo, Janson!"

Janson looked over the same time Jewie and Ommis did, all lifting their brows at the old shipmate call.

Wedge strutted over with a rebel grin. "Where's the party?"

* * *

Luke buried himself in work, as usual, and distracted himself in calm for the rest of the day and into the evening, studying upcoming mediations, reviewing construction plans, fretting over the still missing pieces of putting this academy together. Even after they had it all built, even if they had plenty of funds to support them for years to come, Luke still had no definitive way to figure out if someone was Force sensitive or not. How would he find new students?

Especially if Kess decided not to breed any?

Finally exhausted, Luke tossed the datapad onto his cluttered desk and leaned back in the big black chair, sighing at the ceiling. Raól went home over an hour ago. Kess had been gone all afternoon. He was alone in the entire Jedi Office complex. It seemed such a huge leg-up when they established the place, but with more work than creature comforts, not even wall hangings in here, it felt like the whole New Jedi Order was a house of cards built on wobbly legs.

Stretched too thin too far. Somehow they needed to find a way to emotionally replenish.

Too bad the clearing was all the way back on Yavin 4.

Luke thought about that, about that place, and grinned wistfully. He recognized it wasn't just him that needed a place, nor that the clearing was the only place that was needed. How often did the girly girls go out to the Mash Pit? How often did the pilots run off to the Tower Lounge? And even with those usual hang outs, from time to time, all members of every clique converged like a family reunion at the South Base Warehouse.

Too bad they didn't have something like that here.

His eyes flicked aside.

Or did they?

His mouth parted with an idea and he sat up to his terminal to start a search. No one could go too long without a retreat of some kind. The Jedi were starting to crack under the pressure of these last five months; how was it possible the regular rebels weren't going bananas without already finding a retreat to replace the old hang outs?

* * *

Work ran late again, but Yana was wrapping up her last report of the day, eager to get home and link up with Wedge again tonight, when Ren Entada rushed over with a datapad in his hand. "Can you take a look at this for me please?"

Yana still didn't trust him entirely, but everything about him so far supported a real effort to protect the Lord Chamberlain. Besides, Yana still had to work with him even if he did have ulterior motives in mind. She took the datapad and sped-read through several unnamed communiqués. It certainly looked curious, someone seemed to be passionate about disrupting any rebel existence on Coruscant, but without the cipher to understand the true meanings behind the key words, it was impossible to know what the true message read.

Seeing she was finished, Ren gestured. "'Throwing a darverk'" is a slang term for 'sabotage'."

Green eyes absorbed the serious concern in his. She read the messages again with that understanding in mind, and shifted her feet to rush for a different set of communique's she saw earlier.

"You saw something too," he commented as she brought up the older message. He read it over her shoulder as she read it off the big screen. The passionate hate for rebel scum was hardly surprising, and without anything to connect this with anything else, it looked like simple Imperial troop bitching. This one however, obscured the term 'darverk' as pretending it to be the name of a person. 'A bunch of us are going to throw down with Darverk and crash a scum party tonight.'

"Do you know of such a party?" Ren asked with concern.

Yana shook her head, but both acted in unison to download and gather all these messages to report in their findings.

Moments later, the entire office team had gathered to hear of these clues with concern as Leia stood in front of her desk and read them for the first time. She absently rubbed her belly, but otherwise didn't look terribly concerned, just alert to take action as needed. "I guess the next question is if any of you know about a rebel party tonight?" She handed the datapad back to Yana by her side and quipped, "And why the heck wasn't I invited?"

Questah was the first to speak. "There's been some chatter lately about finding a new hangout in Coco Town, but I don't know the name of it."

Many nodded, thinking in silence, trying to remember any reference of any upcoming party. There was some small talk, but none of it seemed significant, only occasional reminiscent references of hangouts on former bases.

Leia tightened her eyes and scratched her chin in thought, then she lifted her finger, but not her eyes, and gestured at Questah. "Is there any place on Coruscant with the same name of our favorite establishments on Yavin's South Base? Any merchants move here with us?"

Questah knew instantly what Leia was getting at. She sat down and tucked her brown hair behind her ear to do a search on the padfolio already in her hand. And she wasn't the only admin in the room to brainstorm and search the networks for similar names of old places. Newly alerted, Questah sat up and read it aloud to the gathering. "'Grand Opening: The Black Tie Casino, once Coco Town's infamous TIE Fighter Pilot hang out, is now re-modeled and under new management as The South Base Warehouse.'"

Questah looked up. Yana looked over. Ren closed his mouth. Leia nodded slowly and motioned to the Purple Guard. "I need you to do me a favor."

* * *

Within minutes, Yana rushed into the data library to grab her bag, but motioned for Ren to wait a moment and turned her back to him. She pulled up the burner datalink to tell Wedge she wasn't going to be able to chat tonight but, in booting it up, found a message already waiting.

W Something came up. Not going to be able to chat tonight. Wish I could. Would rather talk to you. Tomorrow morning though. Benduday. 10 am.

Something came up? On a payday Zhellday? Yana instantly suspected what Wedge was going to go do instead. She braced herself for the possibility of walking in on him at this party and find him hanging on another woman. They weren't even dating yet, not officially, so she would have no right to be angry, but she was angry already, just in the anticipation of it. She stuffed the datalink into her bag, met eyes with Ren Entada and Questah, and nodded that she was ready to go.

Yana was ready for war.


	34. LL6 33 The New South Base Warehouse

The Lord Chamberlain didn't want to just stop the sabotage, whatever it was, she also wanted the terrorist caught and smeared across the Newsnets.

Because of her job, Yana already knew the images of suspected Imperial terrorists and there was no time to train someone else. Because of _his_ job, Ren Entada knew a lot more people than that, and many of them knew him too- enough to slither into conversations that might be telling. In the speeder on the way, Yana painted on make up to make her look like a high-priced call girl and Ren flew, murmuring warnings and apologies for all the things he would have to say to fit in. Infiltrate and discover - that was their job tonight. And they were just the first wave of it, because Questah was _right now_ trying to raise the Jedi and other loyal rebels in the Security Force to descend upon the place as well.

Still in his purple guard uniform, Ren lifted his elbow like a gentleman for Yana to take. Yana had changed into a slinky, emerald dress scrounged quickly out of someone's nearby closet. She took his elbow with the grace and poise of a true lady, and managed a simple smile on her face no matter what was happening. This was one time being mute had its advantages; she could spend less time maintaining conversation and more time observing the people in her surroundings.

Red neon lights lit up the letters so big that the sign stretched almost entirely the width of the second floor of the building. Through the upper story windows, swirling color lights and pulsing strobes pumped in time with the heavy beat and bathed the street with color and sound. Several bouncers stood guard outside to keep the place, but they weren't checking lists or identchips. People of all species and orientations flowed in and out of the front doors like blood through a heart. Even those who hadn't thought to stroll in, who were on their way to or from someplace else, paused at the banner hanging on the exterior wall, and opted to check the place out.

SOUTH BASE WAREHOUSE

Grand Opening Event

One Free Drink Per Customer.

(Retago or Ice Wine.)

The place was _packed_.

One bar spread half the width of the first central room. To the left and right, two grand archways opened up to equally large side rooms full of gambling tables, dance floors, and lounge seating. Even though she'd never been there before, Yana could tell the entire thing had been extensively remodeled. The flowery carpet still smelled of fresh wool. The neon lights were flawless. The music was crisp and loud.

But the decor itself wasn't new at all. Hanging from every available wall space hung old museum pieces of a war that only ended five months ago. Orange fighter T-suits. Black TIE uniforms. Taun taun saddles. Stormtrooper helmets. Alliance Rank insignia. Imperial Rank insignia. And all of it was separated, severed down the middle of the building, separating all the Imperial looking stuff to the right and all the Alliance stuff to the left.

With that sub-conscious suggestion, the crowds did the same thing to themselves. Yana recognized quite a few people in here, and most of her old acquaintances gathered toward the left, moving in and out of the left room where green neon pulsed and played like laser cannons of a TIE fighter shooting at Rebels. With Yana on his arm, Ren led her toward all the Imperial veterans hanging out on the right where that room pulsed with red lights like lasers of an X-wing shooting at Imperials.

Yana's eyes were everywhere. There were so many people it was shoulder to shoulder, and the dark room and pumping lights skewed recognition of any of these faces against her memory of mug shots. They stepped through the archway to the Imperial side to find the walls were painted black behind the Imperial war decor. Hovering over everyone's heads, cabled to the ceiling of the vaulted second story, hung an actual TIE Bomber.

Yana's eyes hung on it an extra beat as they entered. Ren touched her fingers on his elbow. "Don't stare."

He was right. She had to pretend she belonged here. Data admin didn't go into the field very often, but she knew enough about enough to have confidence she could do this right.

Ren got them two ice wines from the Imperial bar, to which they both received a glowing stamp on the back of their hands to signify they had received their complimentary, grand-opening drink, and led her to a dice table, where several Imperial acquaintances were already gathered and gambling. He didn't bother to introduce her. He simply launched into smiling greetings and shared complaints about having to deal with rebel scum.

Yana pretended she didn't understand any of their conversation and more so that she didn't care. She hung on Ren Entada like she was happy enough just to be hired for the night.

* * *

Janson, Jewie, Ommis, Rogan, Antilles, and Lendra The Civilian Emperor (as he was now nicknamed) all strutted in as if they were going to occupy the place like an invading an army. Conversation was bright and smiles were frequent. They waited in line together at the central bar to get their complimentary drinks, at which Antilles grabbed Lendra's hand and shoved it over to receive the stamp the same time Antilles passed over Lendra's free drink back to Janson for the wingman to drink instead.

This was a test, they told him, and they were glad to oblige. No one was going to get rip-roaring drunk tonight anyway, but they were all ready to babysit the Civilian Emperor so he could get used to hanging out with a gang and still not fall off the wagon. Nik was grateful and enjoyed this company immensely.

Once they all had a shot of retago in their hands, and Nik had a glass of water, Antilles lifted it into the air and shouted. "To the fallen!"

"To the fallen," they said in unison. They threw the liquor down their throats and threw the shot glasses back on the counter. With that procedure completed, they roamed to the archway on the left, all cranking their necks and smiling big at the second story vaulted ceiling where a full-sized X-Wing hanging by cables over their heads.

* * *

Amongst the shoulder-to-shoulder crowd behind the far end of the central bar, Kess snickered at all of them. She saw this place when she left Dex's in search of public transport, and the neon sign lured her in for the one free drink, which she was still nursing. She didn't want to talk to anyone, she had to go home soon anyway, so she tried a Force trick she hardly remembered and masked her facial features by clouding the minds of anyone who might recognize her.

She wasn't expecting Ren and Yana to walk in together. That was strange enough. But now Nik was hanging out with the Rogue Group veterans? She saw it when Wedge wouldn't let her brother have a drink, and made him get the drink stamp so he could sneak back for one later. Clearly, Nik was in good hands, so Kess let it be. Besides, she knew all too well the pressures of beginning Jedi training. Nik needed a South Base Warehouse too. And now he had one.

Kess looked over the clashing of Rebel and Imperial memorabilia and symbolism throughout the decor and muttered at herself, "This new management is an idiot if they think they aren't promoting a thousand bar fights with this set up."

Mentally, she shrugged it off. This place was cool, but it was way too crowded tonight to be the peaceful retreat she had been looking for. She stared at her drink and considered not even finishing it. What she needed more than anything was to go home, take a shower, meditate, and talk this crap out with Luke before it festered into something ugly.

She began to get off the barstool - and she sensed him coming.


	35. LL6 34 A Talk Over A Drink

Kess sat back down and sighed a smile of disbelief. Luke's light was like a wailing siren on the Force. Even with all these people, all these bright emotions and noisy thoughts, Kess sensed him approaching the pub on foot. He wasn't in a bad mood, but he wasn't entirely in a good one either. He was ... _business_. After their run-in today, Kess felt a little insulted that he would be coming here on the momentum of 'business'.

As much as she sensed him, he sensed her. His eyes found her through the bodies as soon as he came through the door. Yet Luke didn't bother to mask who he was and nearly everyone around recognized him. He smiled and shook hands with old war buddies, he shared a joke with a stranger who called his attention. Polite and friendly, his feet made his way through the crowds to get back to where Kess sat at the central bar.

There were no available stools. In fact, Kess only managed this one with a Force Pursuade she'd never admit. And the crowds were so tight that Luke only had enough room to lean one elbow on the bar beside her, close enough that his chest bumped her left shoulder. He was offered his free drink and gave his fake hand to receive the stamp. Then he waited, and she waited, until the droid moved away, and the crowd around them finished commenting on their presence and moved onto other topics.

"I've been trying to reach you on the comm," Luke murmured, his eyes gazing over everyone else in the crowd but her.

"I was about to come home anyway," she admitted.

He rubbed his lips and nodded, eyes scraping over the crowd, and finally turned to her with a lower murmur. "We're actually on mission right now. Leia received a report of saboteurs here tonight."

Kess's mood shifted to instant business. She hid her words behind her shot glass. "What do we know?" She sensed out, as he was, but found only the busy room and busy minds.

"Not much," he admitted, and finally met her eyes. "We're just going to have to sit here and observe."

She nodded again with full understanding. Their clearing of the air was going to have to wait until later, but that was okay. "Is that why Yana is here with Ren?"

"Yep." He brought the drink to his lips.

"And why Wedge and the pilots are here with Nik?"

Luke's eyes shifted over. "No." He looked around. "Where are they?"

"That side. And Ren and Yana are on that side." She told him. "If we're worried about a terrorist attack or bomb threat, why aren't we just clearing the building?"

"Because Leia wants them caught, not just thwart them."

"If it's a remote detonator, we're not going to sense them anyway."

"Yeah, but they're not going to risk blowing up their own people. The only thing we know for certain is that it's a couple of Imperials. Now that I see the place I know why they picked it. I know it's going to be here. They can get a whole troop of us while they all stand around and gloat from the other side of the room."

Kess angled her head to give him a look, but she kept her voice especially quiet under the pumping music. "Well since everyone and his slave droid recognized you when you strutted in here like a Living Legend, you may have already thwarted whatever they had in mind. I guess the best thing we can do is sit here and pretend we're just out drinking together until we sense someone is about to make a move."

"Come to think of it, you and I have never had a drink together. So, another first for us," he said as he motioned to the bartender to come back. He adjusted his elbow against the bar beside her and looked her in the eye. "It's nice to know we have a few of those left."

Lightly humored, she could only smile at it. "I'd like to think we have _a lot_ of those left."

The bartender droid set down two more shots of retago on the bar. Luke picked up both and handed one to her. Kess had never seen him do something like this before, and never suspected he would do so willingly, of his own idea, and with a light-hearted mood to boot. She was charmed anew, and took the shot glass, raising it a few inches. "To the fallen."

He started to smile, eyes grazing over the crowd once more as to keep on the mission and not get distracted by this moment, but he smiled warmly at her, like she was the only one in the room worth looking at, and lifted his shot too. "To the fallen."

She sucked down the shot even though she didn't want it, and watched his face scrunch when he drank his. She laughed as he coughed. And he laughed a little too as he set down the empty glass. In love all over again, she giggled. "One of these days, we should take a real night away and get truly plastered."

Luke sniffed, grinning, and murmured comically back, "Let's put that on the calendar when we get back to the office."

Kess tossed her head back and laughed loud.

Frequently, their eyes grazed the crowd, and their senses were wide open for danger. The press release of their engagement was old news now. Quite a few people spiked with recognition at them but those moments passed quickly. The Alliance in the room only took a moment to pause and grin at the two of them out in public as a pair. The Imperials in the room rolled their eyes, grumbled, and stepped away to hang out away from the Jedi reach. And the non-veteran general public, which there were far more of that than the other two, looked on Luke and Kess as if they were the same cheesy museum decor as the dusty old uniforms and shells of fighters hanging from the ceiling.

Soon, the woman in the barstool beside them looked over her shoulder to see who it was that kept bumping into the back of her. Luke glanced over his shoulder and gave the woman a smiling 'sorry', but she looked at him with mild alarm.

Then stretched her neck to see the other Jedi to which he was crowding close to talk to.

Without a word, she climbed off the stool and motioned him to have it. Luke tried to politely decline, "You don't need to do that." But she insisted with another gesture and disappeared in the crowd.

Luke shrugged and took the stool before someone else did.

Kess recognized Luke wasn't trying to flirt with the woman, but the symbolism of one quick contact causing the lady to scurry away... Kess snuck in a quiet joke, "Picking up women at bars isn't quite your forte, is it?"

He smiled bashfully, looked around, and murmured back, "Obi Wan didn't get the chance to cover that particular Force trick."

"And yet, people without use of the Force at all seem to do it better than you."

Blue eyes shifted over, full of truth. "I got what I wanted. It's not a trick I need."

Kess flushed a little. How was it they were in a fight a few hours ago and now they were back to flirting like the last six months of stress never happened. She didn't understand it. She liked it, but she didn't understand it. Clearly, they still needed to talk, but she knew this was not the time or place to clear that air. Patience. She had faith they'd work this one out.

Again, another mutual moment of pause to note the people in their surroundings, to sense out for the emotions happening in the side rooms they couldn't see: lots of strangers meeting and chatting and becoming acquaintances, a few first dates enjoying the music and flirting over gambling, several old pals finding each other for the first time since the Battle of Coruscant, and the occasional eruption of a boldly exaggerated old war tale...

The bartender droid came up and offered two more free drinks of their choice, pointing at the vid screen built into his chest where the South Base Warehouse New Management - the old codger who used to run the Mash Pit back on Yavin 4 - simply gave them a thumbs up and hit his remote button to flash the command text, ON THE HOUSE.

Luke and Kess smiled, waved at the little screen, and ordered low alcohol ales.

Yavin 4. The good old days. Both individually reminisced for a moment, sipping the new full mugs, and thought about that Rogue Group party where they were prompted to light up and duel out that One-Two-Three-Block on the dance floor just so the gang could see them in action. They hadn't sparred since they left that little moon. They hadn't gone running since they left that little moon. With the overwhelming population here pumping emotions in through every window and wall, they hadn't really had a moment to be truly alone since they left that little moon.

"I have a confession to make," he said quietly, adjusting himself on the stool so he could face her as he talked. His eyes remained on his beer mug for most of it, watching his finger play with the froth dribbling down the glass. He seemed to struggle with it, hesitant to admit it, but he said it anyway. And he met her eyes when he did. "I knew."

Taking it as it came, Kess leaned an elbow on the bar and rested the side of her head in her palm. "Knew what?"

"What happened that night before the launch," he admitted. "It was an accident. I was wondering why you were late and sensed out to see if you were on your way. And I cheated because I should have just commed you, but I guess I'd gotten lazy with it."

Kess rubbed her lips and retracted them.

"And then I messed up even more, because when I sensed your emotions in that moment, I got jealous, and angry, and I should have asked you about it when came over that night, but I didn't." He cleared his throat.

Kess struggled between guilt, anger, and fear. "What did you do instead?"

Luke stared at his mug for a moment before meeting her eyes, and admitted it with a self-depreciating grin. "I looked at the security feed."

She nodded slowly... and her mind quickly put it together. The man had top secret access to anything he needed, sure, but he still needed a data admin who knew how to find what he was looking for. Kess already knew the answer, "And who helped you find the right security feed?"

Luke angled his head with a tight grin. "Guess."

Kess dropped her eyes in her palm and whispered a cuss word.

She tried to imagine the moment: Luke asking Yana's help to see the feed, and the two of them staring in shock at what they saw. Of course, Yana couldn't say anything to anyone. That was her job. And she was very practiced at it. But now Yana's hesitance and continued distrust of Wedge made a lot more sense. Especially when Kess - who _did_ have the right to talk about it - never brought up the incident with her best friend and First Lady to be able to clear the air.

Finally, Kess gestured her fingers away from her face. "Does _Wedge_ know any of this?"

"He knows _I_ know." Luke told her. "I threatened to kill him on the _Mon Icarus._ I know I shouldn't have said that, but it needed an answer." His eyes grazed the crowd again, not forgetting their primary purpose here, and came back to her. "He doesn't know that Yana and I heard what he said."

Kess's eyes flicked away and came back. "When? What did he say?"

Luke smiled at this. "You don't remember?"

She met his gaze with truth. "Honestly, I don't think about it much."

Luke smiled more and shifted, "He said, as he walked away from you, he said, 'You take good care of him.' And _you_ said, 'I will.' "

Kess thought back and tried to remember that part. She nodded. It sounded right.

"So I knew it was a 'goodbye' all along. Disturbing. Worrisome. Since I didn't know what led up to that, but I _knew_ it wasn't going to become a continuing matter. I didn't bring it up to you because I tried to meditate it away. The only part that I couldn't meditate away is why you didn't tell me about it, especially with you spiking with guilt every time he came up in conversation. So I knew you didn't forget and I just didn't understand why you wouldn't come clean."

"Because I didn't want to worry you," she noted flatly.

He nodded. He sighed. And he looked her in the eye as he nodded some more. "Just don't do that anymore. Please?"

Kess burst with laughter, _"Of course not!"_

Luke grinned with relief at her instinctive answer. He sipped his ale.

She squinted one eye over, "Did you really think I was keeping something 'in reserve'?"

"No," he angled his head to look her in the eye and hooked one hand to hang on the back of his other wrist. "That part came from me."

She scrunched her face. "How do you mean?"

"We were about to launch. And it was going to be the biggest battle in the war. I didn't bring it up to you that night because we didn't have time. I didn't want to spoil our last night together. But after I learned for certain who it was, and what you guys said... I guess a part of me made a decision not to say anything." He dug his tongue into his molar for a moment, and forced himself to admit it. "Because if something happened to me... Wedge is the only one I would approve of to replace me."

Grinning softly, and eyeing him strangely, Kess studied him for a long moment, complimented by his sentiment. But she doused the seriousness of this with a joking dare. "Not Lando?"

Luke burst into a snicker and laughed even more than that, shaking his head. "Nope! _Not_ Lando!"

Kess tossed her head back with full laughter, soon falling against his shoulder to half-cuddle as she did. She and Lando didn't have compatible personalities to get romantic anyway, but Luke's frantic protection of her from falling for the smooth-talking smuggler was an innocent button of hilarity. Luke set one arm around her back, smiling at the joke, but used his other hand to raise his beer to the sky. "Sorry, man!" He sipped and set his beer down, now holding her hand between their bodies, and added off-handedly. "But I suppose if both me _and_ Wedge went down in that thing, Lando would have been my third choice."

"Funny. You think more about who I would date after you than I do."

He glanced over. "Why? Who would you pick?" His question was an honest one.

She looked him in the eye and shook her head. "I honestly haven't given _any_ thought."

"Well, good. Let's keep it that way."

She tittered anew. "You're the one that's doing all the thinking!"

Luke rolled away a bashful grin.

"One, love," she sniggered hard.

And Luke threw his head back for a real and strong laughter too...


	36. LL6 35 Mock Battles in Arcade Simulators

Acquaintances quickly became friends. When the salty TIE pilots eventually asked Ren about his silent date, he told them that he didn't remember what her name was, but she was deaf and mute anyway. He added as an after-thought, "but I think she can read lips so be careful what you say."

They weren't careful. In fact, they threw insulting comments about her without holding back, and Yana successfully pretended she was bored enough to watch the rest of the crowd, to be interested in the war decor on the walls, since she couldn't follow the conversation anyway.

Ren was doing a great job of snaking his way into their inner-circle conversation topics, making them think he was one of them, and eventually slid in a deviously-smiling comment. "Actually, I heard someone was going to throw a Darverk here tonight and I just came to enjoy the show."

They didn't rise to the bait, but they didn't shy away from it either. The imperial group shared open consensus that such an event would be worth staying longer for. Yana began to suspect Ren had chosen to infiltrate the wrong group of suspects, and realized that, if they were smart, they wouldn't admit to anything with a stranger standing their anyway - deaf and mute or not.

After a minute, she turned to Ren with lover's eyes and signed that she was going to the ladies room.

Ren shrugged comically in front of his friends, "I don't have any idea what you just said, darling, but get me another drink while you're at it." He handed over his credit chip. Yana took it with a cute grin and turned to disappear into the crowd.

"Is she for hire?" One of the pilots asked him.

"Of course she is." Ren grinned smugly, "Why?"

"Deaf and mute. That's how I like them." The pilot chortled, "You let me know when she's concluded her contract with you, eh?"

He angled his head. "We'll see how the night pans out."

Yana listened to everything and didn't react to any of it. There were no murmurs about Darverks, or pranks, or anything insidious - Just the grumbling of rebel scum in one group and the grumbling of palpy jackasses in another. Then she passed by a group where one was saying. "It sure _is_ him. That's Luke Skywalker. Right there."

Without pausing her feet, Yana caught a glimpse of the two Jedi across the big central room, nearly cuddled together in their laughter at the far end of the bar. They didn't see her, but that didn't mean they didn't know she was there. They were likely just putting on a show. Yana was relieved to see them present for this potential disaster.

The line for the ladies room on the Imperial side stretched beyond its little hallway where women watched four people flying TIE simulators like they were arcade games. Four big-screens hung on the walls to show the mock battle to the rest of the audience. These TIE-simulated pilots shouted and cawed from their VR helmets and fake cockpits as their digital selves chased down and fired upon digital X-wings.

Yana's eyes looked up on the second-story wall above the four big screens to find a fifth. It was a solid stream of video looking down on four X-Wing simulators manned with four VR-wearing, cockpit squatting rebels operating similar arcade games. The other side was being watched by as many people as watched this one. The flashing lights, the crowd, the cheesy war memorabilia... The opposing forces were in the same _bar_. Did they any of them notice they were fighting against other real people?

Her eyes took in the battle screens as the fake TIEs and fake X-wings swarmed each other. When one X-wing smashed into another TIE, taking them both out in balls of bright flame until that screen went blank, the TIE pilot whipped off his VR-helmet and cussed.

Yana's eyes flicked up again to see it. The X-wing pilot also pulled off his VR Helmet to hand it over to the next guy waiting a turn. The pilot was Wes Janson, Wedge's old wingman from Hoth days, and he handed the helmet to Dan Rogan, Wedge's wingman _now_.

Yana closed her mouth but masked all other expression. She waited in line at the restroom and watched just like all the others did, but struggled with near impatience to see who else was behind the other helmets.

The line moved. She stepped forward. But her eyes remained on the screen above.

Within seconds, another X-wing spun out, clearly operated by an amateur, and the TIE pilot raised his fists with a hoot of victory. Through the upper screen, Yana watched a second 'pilot' take off his helmet: Nik Lendra.

She glanced back to check Ren's status. He was hunched over on his elbows on the high table, smiling and chortling with the those from which he was trying to glean information. She wished she had been more useful. Though she knew some of the Imperial faces, she didn't identify any of them as known problems. Maybe they weren't at the right party.

But her eyes flicked back up to the upper screen. Just as Nik was climbing out of the fake little cockpit so someone else could get into it, Wedge Antilles stepped up from nowhere and offered Nik one of two drinks in his hands.

 _Can't talk tonight, huh?_ But she scolded herself too that she had cancelled the datalkink meet up for the same reason, even if she had a better reason for it. Still, she recognized that Wedge handed Nik something in a glass designed to signify a non-alcoholic drink, so maybe Wedge had a better reason for it too. Wedge sipped a beer an Nik sipped his non-alcohol as they bumped shoulder to shoulder and studied the mock battle of their shipmates. Wedge murmured and gestured with his hands, explaining things to Nik, how to fly, how to fight, how to understand what was going on. Nik watched the fight like he was studying for a test, nodding with new understanding. And Wedge kept on explaining the shop talk.

The line moved some more and Yana stepped forward, now nearly out of view of the whole thing and mostly blocked by others collected to chat by the wall. She peeked one eye over that near shoulder to soak in the look of Wedge on that high screen, and her heart thumped again. He was so cute the way he got giddy about flying. He was smiling and jolly, and patting Nik on the shoulder with manly friendship like they were already close pals.

Yana tried to remind herself again that she wasn't 100% certain it was Wedge on the other side of the burner datalink anyway. The whole think could have been a ruse to infiltrate her.

 _But what if it was?_

Her mouth smiled in spite of herself.

At least she'd find out in the morning. Benduday. 1000. Everyday clothes.

 _Please be you._

The line moved again, and she began to step entirely out of view of that upper screen, when on that screen Nik looked up to _their_ screen to look the TIE-pilots in _their_ fake cockpits.

His face struck shock when he saw and recognized _her_.

Before she realized he was looking at the same view of this room, Nik whipped his fingers against Wedge's chest, and Wedge looked up too.

His mouth fell open. His black brows knitted with confusion. Blindly, he shoved his beer into Nik's hand and turned away in a rush to hunt out the other camera.

Yana panicked. She saw the restroom line was still five people deep and turned away from the hall entirely. She sifted through the crowd to the main room as fast as she could, intent on intercepting Wedge before the Imperials realized she was a Rebel.


	37. LL6 36 Hims and Hers

Luke glanced up a split second before Kess did, both alerted to the sudden emotion coming from two familiar souls, and they instantly realized the misunderstanding. Without need for discussion, Luke and Kess popped off their stools and threaded the crowd quickly, but not too fast to raise any alarms, so they could both stop Wedge before he blew Yana's cover.

They didn't make it. Wedge burst out of the archway from one side-room, full of confusion and emotion, the same time Yana marched fast and stoic from the other archway. But she didn't meet his eye. She simply walked, quickly, almost angrily, not looking at anyone, and walked right passed him like he wasn't even standing there.

Dumbfounded, palms spreading in the universal sign language of "WTF?", Wedge watched her go by and disappear around the corner from where he came.

Only then did he notice the two familiar Jedi coming at him from a different direction.

Wedge rolled his head and blinked away a quiet moan before giving Luke and Kess a look of contention. Luke didn't address him. He simply nudged Kess's elbow and muttered in her ear, now close enough and clear enough for Wedge to hear what he said. "You explain it to him. I'll explain it to her." He peeled off to follow Yana.

Kess's feet stopped short to look at Luke's back, aghast at that particular division of labor. Luke turned as he went, spreading his hands in a shrug. "We got a bigger job to do. We can't get distracted with any more confessions tonight."

Kess sighed hard, slumping her shoulders, but she understood what he meant. As he walked away, she grumbled sarcasm. "I'm sure it's got nothing to do with how much she looks like a redhead right now." Now face to face with a perturbed and confused Wedge, she flattened her mouth at him.

He shook his head slowly and crossed his arms at his chest to lock his knees with strength, laughing sickly as he went. "If you confess _anything_ to me tonight, grease monkey, I'm going to slap you silly."

Kess rolled her eyes and stepped closer, snatching his elbow and pulling him out of the foot traffic to the edge of the archway. "She's on assignment tonight. That's why she's here."

"What assignment?"

In low murmurs under the thundering music, Kess explained what little she knew about the threats of sabotage. She told Wedge that Yana was here with Ren Entada to try to infiltrate the imperial rumor mill on the other side of the bar. Wedge took this in stride, nodding with understanding, but eyed back to where Yana and Luke had left with a different kind of worry.

"There's something else," Kess said darkly.

His eyes sliced over, clearly unsure if he wanted to hear anymore.

She rubbed her lips and lowered her voice even further, not looking directly at him as she spoke.

"And I'm telling you this only in the interest of helping you understand Yana a little. I will never again bug you about comming her. And I will not bring this subject up again. _But_ -"

"But what?" His tone was cold.

"Luke sensed out to find me that night, and when he detected the rise in my Force Print, he sought out Yana to help him see the security feed to see what caused it."

Wedge closed his eyes and shifted them away before he opened them again. His lips pressed until he sucked them in and bit down.

"Yana can't bring it up with me _or_ you because it's her job not to. They were in the CIC bunker when they saw the feed. I have the right to confess it to _her_ , but I'm gonna let _you_ make the call whether or not I do that."

Wedge stared at nothing over her shoulder. He looked pissed. "Stop talking."

Instead, Kess stopped trying to be quiet. "Look, Wedge, you're one of my dearest friends and I love you to death, but quit being an ass, will you please?"

A reluctant grin spread into his cheeks. Brown eyes fell onto her with humor and he pretended wanting to back-hand her.

She lowered her voice again, but this time she had his eyes. "I don't know if you commed her already, and I don't know if you're going to, but I want it to work out for you two. _I really do._ As her friend, _and yours_ , I ask you to remember that that girly girl knows a lot more secrets about what went down on Hoth and Yavin 4 than you, me, _and_ Luke all put together. And she _can't_ talk about it. Even if she could talk. So be gentle. Be patient. And for Force's sake, don't treat her like Novato did or I'm going to slice your arms off myself."

His grin dug deeper. His shoulders rumbled with a silent chuckle.

" _You get me_?" She demanded.

Wedge nodded fervently. He eyed over again, eyes shining now, and nodded some more. "Willco, Commander." And then he laughed.

"Good!" She shoved him away. "Now get your ass back in there and keep my brother from drinking."

Wedge chuckled some more, and turned away to return to his 'duty'. Coming down from the frustration, Kess sighed hard and peeked through the archway at how her brother was doing, smiling at the old gang with which he was making fast friends, but Wedge, in his stroll back to them, turned back to her and signed ' _thank you'_.

Kess signed back, _'yw'_.

* * *

Meanwhile, Yana marched right passed Nik and the rest of them and straight down the bathroom hall on the rebel side, passing the line of women to dive into the empty corner by the back door - a moment away from it all to gather her wits.

With his hands in his pockets, Luke strolled down the hall behind her, ignoring the women waiting in line, and dropped his back against the wall beside her hiding spot.

Yana looked up to find him, sighed hard and moved to lean against the same wall, using his larger body as cover to hide her from the common area.

"You okay?" He murmured.

Yana sighed once through her nose and nodded, but she wasn't convincing.

"Nik needed a night away from his Jedi Master. Wedge is here to make sure he doesn't drink during the escape."

Yana's eyes flicked over to hear that, but she nodded again, understanding now.

"Anything on the other side?"

She shook her head.

Now it was Luke to sigh and gaze out to the common area for a clue. "Maybe we got the wrong place."

Yana shook her head again. Her eyes were severe to look over at him. She shook her head again.

Luke understood what she meant. He glanced out at the common area again and worried. He wasn't sensing anything out of place. Maybe his presence had thwarted whatever the imperials had planned.

Yana touched his elbow to get him to look at her. Then she gestured an index finger back out there. A question. And he would surely be able to sense the topic.

Luke grinned in all friendliness. "I'm not worried. And neither should you."

She flattened her mouth, shrugged, and shook her head, unable to promise that.

Luke pulled off the wall then, shifting his feet so he could lower his head and murmur closer to her ear. "Let him prove it to you."

Her eyes flicked up. Luke's grinned down. He nodded, turning away, and mouthed it again. "Let him prove it."


	38. LL6 37 Thank You For Your Service

Hand still stuffed in his pockets, Luke strolled out of the back hallway with the intent to put his mind back to business. _Damn if she didn't look like a redhead in that green thing!_ He took his natural reaction as a lesson on how to better understand -and _accept_ \- that moment of distraction Kess and Wedge once had. _Point and match,_ he thought. That worrisome side quest could now be put to rest.

So focused on following Yana to make sure she was okay, and exchanging glances with Nik as the apprentice watched all this with concerned confusion, and keeping his senses open to detect violent ill-intent from the hordes of strangers in this beat-thumping club, Luke didn't notice he'd walked right under it. But now, as he strolled out with one less thing on his mind, his feet stopped short, and his eyes turned up with dismayed humor to find the ass-end of a full-sized X-Wing hanging from the ceiling above everyone's heads.

Luke Skywalker's comical expression to it drew more attention from the neighboring partiers than the X-Wing itself had done. Two people pulled out pocket photocaps to sneak a snapshot of this moment.

Nik, still pretending to watch the mock battle on the simulators, continued to watch all this other activity with alert. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he recognized normal Zhellday-night-bar-drama-happening between budding couples. Now his eyes found Luke smirking at the X-wing over their heads, and grinned up at the thing as well.

The X-Wing was gutted to be sure - the tail ports were empty, indicating the engine was gone. And it was freshly painted - probably some broken loser pulled from the junk pile just for its frame. Luke angled his head and squinted a humored eye at it. _Don't I know you from somewhere?_

Wedge strolled up and took his beer back from Nik, checking the level in the glass to make sure none of it was gone, and turned to stand beside Luke. "Guess it's only a matter of time before we're museum pieces too."

"What are you guys flying now?" Nik asked as he joined the group, looking up at the big X-wing belly that spread across the ceiling. One fat cable tethered it from the center, but four more smaller cables pinned it up at its nose, aft, and two wings S-foiled open. He used this live example to understand Wedge's lesson from moments ago. It was hard to tell in the arcade visual of a TIE fighter, but an X-wing hanging from four cables, now "pitch", "yaw", and "roll" made a lot more sense.

"A-wings," Wedge reported. "Every time we went up in X-wings, they shot at us. Every time we went up in _TIEs_ , they shot at us."

Luke's brow stretched. "Who was shooting at you?"

" _Civilians_ ," Wedge stressed. "Blasters from the street. Didn't do any damage, but they were missing the point of what we were doing up there. I ended up having to send watches with X-wings winged by TIEs, and vice versa, just to confuse everybody until the A-wings were ready."

"A TIE fighter and an X-wing flying in formation on watch?" Luke shook his head and chuckled. "That had to be a sight.

Wedge chortled. "Talk about keeping your hands on the dampers so the black blobs could keep up." (It wasn't true. TIEs were nearly as fast as X-wings, but the insult was appropriate.)

As the two medal-wielding Rebel Veterans and the Momentary Emperor stood in the middle of the floor to talk fighter chat under the ass of the X-wing, as several onlookers snapped secret photocaps of them doing it, as Yana began to sneak out of the back hall and paused to find their backs blocking any invisible escape (and paused longer to eye the X-wing and listen to what they were saying about it), as Ommis and Janson took off their VR helmets and handed them to Rogan and Jewie...

Kess stepped deeper into the Rebel side-room with her eyes hard on the X-wing above her and her face tilted with open-mouth amazement. The thing was big enough that it shadowed an entire craps table, but now the gamblers were enjoying the specific crowd observing the X-wing as much as they paid attention to the betting. Kess stepped up to look up at the nose of it and stared up like she was seeing a ghost.

Nik called over the noise at her with a brotherly dig. "Why are you looking at it like you've never seen one before?!"

Kess's eyes came down from it, but not to look at Nik. Across the length of the craps table, she met eyes with Luke, who met her eyes and smirked to know exactly what she was thinking.

"Do you care?"

He shook his head and shrugged. But pulled one hand from a pocket to gesture her to go ahead.

Wedge shifted his eyes. "What?"

Nik stepped up closer. "Care about what?"

They all watched Kess step up to the craps table and make a scene. She motioned both hands for them to finish this round of bets, then ordered them to grab their chips from the table. A bouncer stepped up to ask what she was doing, but she waved her hand as if a gesture at his face, "This will only take a minute." She grabbed a nearby chair and used it as a step stool to climb on top of the craps table.

The crowd reared away but stood in a circle around all this and smiled to watch and learn what was going on. Even Yana took a step out of the back hall so she could see what Kess was up to. The woman Jedi and veteran X-wing engineer stood her full height on top of the craps table and looked up, but the X-wing was still a half-metre out of her reach. She motioned down to someone. "Hand me up that chair."

Three people worked to hand the chair up to her on the table. She set it center of the green felt and carefully stepped on the seat to raise herself a little higher.

Nik spat at this insanity. "Kess? What the hell are you doing?!" Now a dozen people were capturing this development on pocket vidcaps.

Luke returned both hands to his front pockets and watched with a deep grin and a low voice. "She's checking if it's still in there."

"If _what's_ still in _where_?"

Ommis laughed, "You think that's _Five_?" It was hard to tell with the new paint job. There was no Group insignia at all, much less its designation.

"Pretty sure," Luke crossed his arms at his chest and watched with humor.

All watched as Kess brought her head up to the back quarter under the engine, fidgeted a panel with her fingers, and finally knocked it with the side of her fist. The tiny door to a storage compartment popped open and she peeked into the empty cavern behind it.

"Well?" Luke smiled loudly.

Pink with giggles, Kess brought her eyes back down and reached her arm into the empty compartment, fumbling with an inside wall of it, pinching her tongue between her teeth to loosen something that was inside, and finally brought out a small object in her hand.

Kess laughed hard as she looked at it. Luke shook his head and bent over at the waist to laugh too. They met eyes again so she could toss the thing across the space to land in his catcher's hands.

"What is it?"

Luke admired it for a moment, then he held the palm-sized hockey puck up for all to see. "A lightsaber power cell."

As she fidgeted to secure the tiny broken door again, Kess called down to explain it to the others. "It's his hidden spare."

"So that _is_ Red Five?"

"Yeah, apparently."

"Kess, get down from there! You're making the bouncers nervous."

Once she secured the little door, she patted Red Five on the belly and called out loud enough to be heard over the music. "Thank you for your service!"

"You kept a spare in your X-wing?"

"Of course I did." Luke sneered, glancing over at Wedge, "Do you have any idea how much power these things draw?" But in his shift in sights, he saw beyond Wedge's deep interest in the power cell, beyond Nik watching Kess with concern as she was climbing on a chair, beyond Ommis and Janson grinning to watch, beyond Rogan and Jewie half turned in their fake cockpits with VR helmets in their laps so they could watch too, and beyond the four big screens blank of any mock TIE/X-Wing battle going on...

His eyes flicked up to the fifth screen. Imperials crowded the other room to watch on the live vid feed, and all faces still with devious anticipation. Ren Entada stood in the middle of them all, staring as if trying to speak at Luke with telepathy.

As soon as he saw Luke's eyes, Ren's eyes twitched up.

Luke looked to the ceiling, to the X-wing hanging from it over all their heads, and Kess now carefully stepping down from the chair atop the craps table.

The whole thing happened in a fraction of a second.

"KESS GET DOWN!" CRACK! Red Five's center cable snapped free. The X-wing fell by an inch and hung on the four smaller cables. Kess lost her balance getting off the chair and it began to wobble under her feet. The aft cable groaned, broke, and whipped like a parted mooring line. Red Five's ass fell another inch. A glass shattered when it was it was hit by a flying cable. Luke shoved Wedge back as he stomped forward. Women shrieked. Men shouted. Bouncers reared back. Nik turned and grabbed the nearest group of bodies to shoved them out of the way. Wedge turned to do the same and found Yana. He scooped her up and pushed her back to the hallway, protecting her with his whole body. The nose cable snapped and whipped, slicing the green felt of the craps table. Red Five began rock to and fro on its yaw axis. Kess's eyes bulged as she control-crashed onto her back on the table, centering herself directly underneath it. _SNAP-SNAP!_ The port wing cable took out a wall lamp. The starboard wing cable shattered the big screen of an arcade simulator.

Now free of all five restraints tethering it to the second story ceiling, gravity won the battle.

Red Five dropped-


	39. LL6 38 Nice Try

\- and hovered.

It took twice as long for everyone to realize it wasn't falling than it took for the thing to break free of its tethers. The music stopped mid-song. Wedge cranked his neck to look over his shoulder. Bouncers stared in shock. More rushed in through the archway, but stopped short. Still recovering from the rushed retreat to the edges of the room, the crowd stared up confusion until they all realized what was happening.

Luke Skywalker hadn't moved from under it; he simply closed his eyes and turned his palms to the ceiling. Kess Lendra hadn't scrambled off the craps table; she simply rested on her back and closed her eyes like she was about to take a nap, brought her hands to her shoulders and turned her palms to the ceiling.

The X-Wing hovered, nudging gently in pitch, yaw, and roll, as if being held by giant hands.

Nik kept one palm back to keep others from joining him as he stepped to Luke with a low mutter, "How can I help?"

Luke took one hand to pull his lightsaber off his belt and blindly pressed it into Nik's chest to take. Once Nik did, dumbfounded at this symbolism, Luke blindly pointed to a different part of the ceiling.

Nik glanced up and opened his senses. There was someone up there. With the music silenced and the crowd staring wordless, they could hear it too. A body scrambled across the durasteel rafters and fiberglass ceiling panels.

"I can't reach it." He murmured as he stepped under the noise and listened to follow it. The crowd parted further from Nik and the green lightsaber blade, giving the man space for whatever was about to happen next. The body scrambling above was quickly reaching the edge of the room. Nik shouted in frustration, "I can't reach it!"

"Throw it!" Kess shouted quickly.

Nik's eyes shot around at anyone nearby in a silent warning, and everyone darted away to crowd hard at the other end of the room. With a pinched mouth, Nik threw the lightsaber up to the ceiling where it tumbled 180 degrees on its way up, and just barely curved enough to slice the durasteel frame holding up the fragile fiberglass tiles.

The green blade knocked back to spin the other direction on its way back down, but with it came sliced tiles of fiberglass... and a body.

Nik launched in to carefully snatch the falling lightsaber out of the air and pulled it out of the way in time not to hurt the body falling with it. Bones cracked audibly as the man fell two stories to the floor in a cannonball position, but Nik angrily stomped and grabbed him by the collar to yank him to his feet.

The culprit growled in pain.

"Get out of the way!" Wedge yelled over his shoulder at Nik, his arms and body still wrapped around Yana by the hall.

Nik shoved the villain into the arms of a bouncer, and several bouncers converged on the man at once. Still with lit saber in his hand, Nik turned his eyes back to the X-wing and stepped back.

 _"Get. Out. Of. The. Way."_ Luke commanded without opening his eyes, but his tone carried a touch of old humor.

"Do you _have it_?" Kess responded with a shout of almost marital frustration.

Luke angled his chin and gritted his teeth. "I'm going to drop this thing on you _on purpose_ if you don't move."

Slowly, Kess opened her eyes and her hands gently released from their concentrated efforts. The X-wing rocked slightly, but Luke had it. She scrambled quickly off the craps table, taking the offering hands of the crowd to help her down and yank her farther to safety.

Now standing aside with the rest of the onlookers, she closed her eyes and lifted her palms again, returning her assistance. "We're going to kill that table."

"There's nowhere else to put it," Luke called back.

Instantly, Nik, Wedge, Ommis, Janson, Rogan, Jewie, the bouncers, Civilian heroes, and Rebel veterans all turned to launch into crowd control, backing people up as far as they could, scooping as many people out of the room as possible so no one got hit by shattering objects when the X-wing crashed down.

Yet, it didn't exactly crash. With Luke at the aft end, and Kess at the port wing, Red Five lowered hesitantly, slowly, to descend atop the craps table. Its size spread over several other tables as well, like a mother bird too big for her own nest.

"Let it go."

"This table's not going to hold it-

 _"Let it go."_

Kess opened her palms and opened her eyes, taking another step back, pressing into bodies pressed against the wall behind her. Luke opened his eyes and watched as his grip gently released. "Take cover!" He called to everyone, unworried, and twitched his fingers further open.

Resting awkwardly on the craps table, Red Five sat there as if looking at everyone with an expression of, _I have a bad feeling about this._

Metal groaned, legs snapped, wood shards went flying, and the craps table crunched flat to the floor under its weight.

 ** _THUD!_**

The noise echoed away to a stunned silence.

Luke took a big breath and began to laugh. Kess sighed and grinned back at him as she shook her head.

"Everyone alright?" Nik called out. "Anyone hurt?" Ommis shouted. Murmurs erupted through the room like a sudden storm. Bodies stirred to leave, and bodies stirred to see it better. Wedge finally faced forward to look down at the woman in green silk he'd been protecting and - suddenly aware of his own maneuver- slowly, politely, let her go.

Yana stared up at his eyes. A dozen thoughts flowed through her soul, but none so loud as the words she wished she could say, _Don't go._

"Sorry," Wedge murmured, backing his palms in a gestured apology at his forwardness, and turned away to let her free.

Kess stepped up and patted the transparisteel canopy with love. Luke stepped around the port wing to stand beside her and petted Red Five's fresh-painted hull with a lamenting sigh. The old codger former-Mash-Pit-owner rushed out of a crowd that was finally retreating from the scene. "Are you guys okay?"

They looked at him and nodded, grinning softly. "Sorry about the table," Kess shrugged.

The man smiled, shook his head, and sighed again. "Don't worry about the damn table."

Luke lifted his brows. "Did you know it was mine?"

"Yeah, I knew! That's why I picked it out of the scrap pile." He pointed vaguely to the other end of the building. "The other one's Vader's!"

Kess threw her head back. Luke dropped his smile forward. They all shared a calming laugh.

The party was over, but it took over an hour to escort everyone out of the building. Nik turned off the lightsaber and returned it to Luke. Key witnesses gathered by Red Five and the shattered craps table to report what they saw to authorities and management. Many bodies that were in the main room for the whole thing fought get a peek of the X-Wing stretching nearly the length and breadth of the side-room before they would be ushered out. Shoulder to shoulder to leave the main entrance, a fist fight erupted between two rebels and three imperials, which was broken up quickly by both rebel and imperial hands already at the scene. Police swarmed the place and helped bouncers with further crowd control on the street. One man - just one - was arrested and shoved by the head into one of the many speeders now parked out front with flashing red, yellow, and blue lights. People paused their disbursement to see how much of the scene they caught on their vid caps. Laughter. Cussing shock. "Did you see that?!" "Come on, let's get out of here." "Where are we going next?" "That deserves another drink..."

By the end of the night, Leia lounged in the center of her couch, rubbing her melon belly with smiling eyes on the newsnet BREAKING REPORT. Chewie sat beside her hooting low laughter. Threepio stood behind the couch with arms up and words of alarm. Ren stood beside Threepio and closed his eyes with disappointment at his old colleagues. Yana sat with poise in a side chair to watch the report with calculating eyes. Wedge stood behind her elbow with his hands in his pockets and erupted with a disbelieving chortle from time to time. Ommis, Jewie, Rogan, and Janson stood together around the kitchen bar in the back to murmur disbelief at it all. Nik sat in the other easy chair and rubbed his eyes every time he was shown or mentioned in the report. Luke dropped his back against the couch beside Leia, closed his eyes in peace, and patted the back of her hand. Kess curled her legs up in the corner of the couch, letting Luke's other arm wrap around her on the back of it, and watched the vid with a strange grin.

Blue-faced Wubak had turned to watch a new vid cap _just now_ provided by one of the witnesses, this one showing that two Jedi had complete control of the situation, while a third, "Yes, that _was_ the Momentary Emperor", used a green lightsaber to cut out and capture the terrorist who tried 'Throwing a Darverk' onto a room full of Rebel Scum.

When the clip ended in a frozen shot of everyone sighing smiles of relief, Wubak turned with a smug grin at her audience. "Nice try, though."


	40. LL6 39 First Date

0920

Yana sat down in what was a comfortable chair once upon a time. This apartment lobby looked like it was nice back when it was new, but after years of deferred maintenance and the victim in a game of Hot Potato between bad business owners, the entire apartment building smelled of rotten upholstery and industrial air. A foot path wore down the carpet to threads between the main entrance and the elevators. Someone had carved several sets of initials in the side table by her elbow. Yana was uncomfortable down here.

But it was better than being upstairs. One of her roommates started the day with blaring music that pumped through the walls to Yana's room. Yana was awake anyway, but it made it impossible to rest longer. Telling the roommate to turn it down would require, of course, a means to communicate the request.

Communicating took too much work and often left her frustrated that she wasn't heard or understood. At work, thankfully, the supportive office staff began teaching each other sign language so they could understand her better, but most of that was related to work topics. Even with the sign language or datalink at the ready, it was too inconvenient to slide in a suggestion before someone else did, and impossible to make any kind of quiet quips to lighten the mood. Yana wasn't an outgoing person to begin with, but this added complication made it even more difficult for new people to get to know her. Five months now without a voice - Yana was finding an uncomfortable acceptance that new people quickly wrote her off as aloof, cold, and unsociable.

Two neighbors strolled by, chatting lively from the elevator to the main doors. She'd seen them and smiled polite hellos at them on several occasions, but today they walked right by her chair and didn't give her a glance. Yana dropped her eyes to her lap, smoothed the calico skirt over her knee, and crossed her legs.

She glanced at the wall chrono.

923

She looked over her choice of 'everyday clothes'; Light shoes, summer skirt reaching just below the knee, a pale sweater in case they went some place cold, and a fat stretchy band over her brown hair to cover the bald spot on her temple. She adjusted the band by her ear, her new self-conscious fidget, checked her fingernails, folded her hands together on her knee, stared at the stained carpet... Her eyes flicked up to the wall.

924

She wondered if she should go get a book from upstairs. She wondered if she should go change into pants. She wondered if she should snack first. She wondered if she should check the burner link again. _No. No don't do that. If he was going to link, he would have done it already. He's out in Coco Town anyway. He's probably already in the air._

926

Last night, Yana warned herself about hoping for too much. After the madness at the South Base Warehouse, after Ren Entada flew her back to her speeder so she could finally go home, Yana booted up the burner link to find no messages. Wedge spent the whole crazy evening snatching glances of her between moments of drama and tension, sometimes adding an uncomfortable grin when he was caught, but he never said anything.

Yana tried to give him the chance too. As bodies shuffled goodnights, and Ren offered to give Yana a ride, she glanced back at Wedge. The man met her eyes, but his face was expressionless. She paused a beat, giving him the chance to step in and say, "No, I'll take her back," or, "See you tomorrow?" or _anything_ , but Wedge never said a thing. Not one word.

She lay awake into the wee hours trying to remind herself that she had no solid evidence it was even him on the other end of the burner link. The nightly chatting on the links were great- she felt like she was getting to know him, and she felt a strange comfort in the suddenly ability to talk in the same capacity as the person she was talking to. She delighted in the ability to have a balanced conversation with someone.

But that didn't mean it was Wedge Antilles. And even if it was, it didn't mean Wedge Antilles wasn't just another Mintalo.

931

At least she'd know. In less than 30 minutes, she'd know. She'd know if it was really him. And by the end of today day, she would know if he was just another Mintalo. First dates said a lot. Yana was ready for any contingency. She had a small bag with lip balm if it got sunny, the sweater if it got chilly, a comm link so she could Morse Code for help, a remote public link up so she could look up transport stations, and a burner datalink that had been on -but blank- for three days.

935

She considered again going up to get a book to read, just so her mind would quit over-thinking this. Instead, she dug into her little bag to see if she could pull up a periodical from the internet link up, then ended up pulling the burner link out too.

W On my way.

Too bad it didn't record timestamps. She had no way of knowing when he sent it, save that she checked it when she got out of the shower three hours ago.

937

Yana took a deep breath and forced herself to calm down, but she ended up looking at the link in her hands, resting on her knee, staring at the words. She felt like a teenager with a crush, an amateur... She closed her eyes and gathered her maturity and wits.

In a moment, she opened them again.

W Hi.

Her brows flitted. Her eyes popped up.

Wedge Antilles stood two meters away from her chair, black slacks, navy tunic over a clean gray shirt. The cut made his shoulders look big and his stomach look flat. His black hair was trimmed, his face was clean-shaven, all done since she saw him last night. He stood in front of her with feet spread apart in confidence and shoulders curled over in concentration. Eyes glittered, mouth grinned, and thumbs hovered over the keypad of the twin of her burner datalink.

Yana smiled big and breathed bigger. She bit her lower lip and typed back.

Y Hi.

Their eyes shared the humor in silence. She gathered her things back to her purse but he stepped up and motioned her not to put the link away yet. He typed more.

W I'm not going to say anything when you can't say anything. 

W So if I'm flying or walking and can't read the link... He shrugged acceptance at his own self-discipline.

Yana read it and understood. It was a kind gesture, and she nodded appreciatively of it. He flicked his head for them to go and grinned to walk with her out of the building.

She expected him to fly some kind of hot rod, but Wedge had a little used commuter speeder with a few vague scratches that were probably already there when he bought it. It was clean though, and comfortably cool, and his little dash comm played some standard music station at low volume. He flew politely through traffic, eyeing her from time to time with a grin on his face, and eventually turned up the music when an old funky song came on. "You can hum, though. Right?"

She put out a hand and waggled it back and forth. Wedge bobbed his head in silly fashion and began humming to the old popular tune, and he kept eyeing her to encourage her to do the same. Yana chuckled at his goofiness and gave in. She couldn't hold a tune to save her life, but she managed to keep up with the playful little hum as they flew across the city.

He stopped humming to pay closer attention to the GPS and lowered them down into the city center of the University District. Public parking garage. Wide, grand steps down to the plaza on the surface. The pointed towers of the University itself were visible on the horizon, but Wedge led the way across the plaza to something else. Ancient trees grew out of antique planters, spreading their canopies so wide the leaves nearly touched each other over the plaza walk. Yana's eyes shifted to take in clues, trying to figure out where they were going. The Imperial Museum? The Cultural Center? The Coruscant Zoo?

But he didn't turn for any of those places. He strutted slowly, and she walked patiently, to an overwhelming building at the epicenter of this entire University District neighborhood.

 **The Galactic Core Library**

a.k.a. Book Nerd Mecca.

 _Okay, so maybe this guy did do his research._

She saw the sign before they came out from under the trees. The round building was a large as the Senate Dome and rose a dozen stories over their heads. This specific section copied the building design of Bakura. That was what made the historic site so iconic: the pie-shaped building was sliced into twelve sections, each tactfully representing the architectural style of one system in the galaxy. The building was rumored to reach all the way down to the earth floor of Coruscant itself. Each level housed a circular kilometer of books in all forms, and each level built atop the last honored twelve more galactic cultures in its architecture, making the place a bit of a Mecca for history and anthropology nerds as well.

"Wow, this is so cool," Wedge crooned quietly.

If there was a point system, he would have already racked up too many to be realistic. A point for arriving early. A point for being well dressed. Two points for somehow getting his hair cut and chin professionally shaved between midnight last night at Oh-Nine this morning. A point for breaking the ice by making her hum a tune in the speeder. A point for a clean speeder. A point for whatever cologne it was she kept catching a whiff of. She expected she'd eventually to catch the hot shot, medal-wielding, fighter pilot to be faking his interest while taking a first date to a library.

 _What does he expect us to do in there? Sit around and read?_

 _... Not that I'd complain, but..._

Yana glanced over, expecting him to be faking this, but she found his neck cranked until his mouth fell open, and eyes of childhood glee looking up the façade as they approached the big entrance. "This must be the Bakuran side." He said and pointed. "See the paisleys in the iron work?"

She glanced, grinned, and ended up stepping ahead of him as he tried to look at everything on the way in, momentarily more interested in the place than in her. Inside, he blinked and skipped back into action to get ahead of her. He pulled something out of his breast pocket and motioned her to come with him to the front desk to check in.

"Wedge Antilles with a guest," he told the droid.

 _He already had a library chip too?_ Yana's eyes narrowed with grinning suspicion that he was laying it on a little thick.

Still, it _was_ an amazing building to visit. The inside was quiet and cool, with a breeze blowing through the open front doors and out the open back doors. She didn't know it until now that the center of the circular structure was hollowed for a grand courtyard. More trees glittered with white lights. Black iron tables and chairs scattered about a mosaic-tiled plaza littered with students and politicians and professors and families being tourists. Yana began to step over to the directory to see what there was to see here, but Wedge touched her elbow and motioned her to keep going with him. He pulled out the link and paused his feet a beat to type.

W We'll tour it a little later. First, I want to show you something.

He led her out to the cheery courtyard and then to a sophisticated food booth. Fancy coffees and interesting mixes of juices. Fresh fruit-and-nut finger nibbles and artisan pastries. Once armed with a classy breakfast, he motioned her over to an empty bench under a tree. He set down his coffee and pastry on the bench, motioned with both hands for her to sit down and stay put, and marched away.

Yana sat down and crossed her legs, curious, but still a little frustrated that she couldn't chat through all of this. He hardly said a word so far. She suspected she probably seemed icy, aloof, and unsociable to him. After a few minutes, she began to look around to see where he'd gone. And she began to fish out the burner link from her purse to see if he sent a message. But Wedge came back, eager and energetic, now carrying a library tray of checked-out datacards and pads. With it, he straddled the bench to face her.

Yana was done with all this. She pointed at him and flapped her fingers like a quacking duck. ' _You. Talk.'_

Wedge lifted an index finger with a scold equaling his lifted brow. ' _Wait a second.'_

He sipped his drink and fidgeted his lip with his teeth as he flipped all the datacards over so she couldn't read the labels. He set that down between them, set his hands on his knees, and paused.

Yana shrugged her hand.

He smirked. Eyeing her with delight and nerves, he inhaled deeply through his nose, scrunched one eye shut to think hard, and lifted his hands from his knees.

And he signed.

' _I am still learning so you must be slow with me.'_

Yana blinked over bulging eyes.

Wedge reached over, loaded the two datapads with two of the cards, and handed her one.

She took it and read the title. **Beginner's BSL Dictionary**

Her brows scrunched. Green eyes leered. _Are you for real?_

After a brief stare back at her of what could have been smugness, or it could have been butterflies, or it could have been trapped breath, he pinched his mouth to think for a moment, and lifted his hands again.

 _'I do not want to be only talking.'_ His eyes lifted to think some more. Clearly, he'd practiced these phrases and was trying to remember them now. It was adorable that he was missing a few words in his sentences. _'Library good place to learn.'_

Yana shifted sidesaddle on the bench and pulled up the dictionary, thumbing through it a moment, thinking too to figure out what she wanted to say. Smiling, blushing, she signed back, _'What do you want to talk about?'_

He smiled from ear to ear, one eye tightened with a devious glitter, his mouth moved as he pointed. ' _You_.'

If there was a points system, Wedge just blew it out of the water.

They nibbled and sipped and tried to figure out how to sign what they wanted to say, often ending up referring to the datalinks to spell out a word the other didn't recognize. The topics were as simple and as innocuous, just as they had been so far on the links, but now they could see each other's expressions and body language, they could see each other smiles. Now, little jokes and silly faces became possible. They played with similar signs carrying vastly different meanings, then started signing crazy sentences just to see of the other caught it. _'Let's walk to hyperspace,'_ and _'I cooked a droid for supper,'_ and _'My speeder is wrinkled.'_

Wedge realized his patience was finally rewarding him when Yana tossed her head back sounded her voice in a bright laughter. Her eyes glittered at him like gems. She often bit her lower lip as if trying to stop smiling, watching him carefully as if she was waiting for the other shoe to fall. Wedge was well aware of it, and respected it, and did everything in his power to prove there _wasn't_ 'another shoe'.

Three hours flew fast. And they didn't realize it until they returned to that food booth to now find it serving lunch-like stuff. After another nibble, they returned the books and the tray, and Yana registered for her own library chip. They strolled around a inside to peek at the museum bits of the place. They wandered through two more of the pie-severed structure designs, then went up a level to stroll through two more. For this part, she said it was okay to just use the datalinks to talk as they walked and looked around. Wedge easily complied for a while, but then he burst into excitement again, that open-mouthed, childlike wonder, to look up at an archway between this section and the next.

He skipped to it and smiled back like he just found a treasure chest, "This is the Hildern Arch!"

Yana shrugged and shook her head as she stepped forward. He touched her shoulder to lean closer and aim her eyes down the length of his pointing finger. "They were big into building with solid stone, but they didn't use any mortar. See? These sections, they're smooth enough so they sit flat, one on top the other. You can't even fit a cotton thread in there. And up there, those pieces are loose."

Yana studied the smooth gray stone arching a perfect half circle overhead. Stone? Overhead? She signed. _'Heavy?'_

" _Very_ heavy." He stepped closer to it so he could gesture at the different parts of it. "They cut the pieces at perfect angles, then built wooden rafters to hold up these arched sides, and then lowered down that center one, there. That's called a 'keystone'. Once that's in, it presses the rest of them outward, and the whole thing sits together, perfectly secure, without mortar or cables or ties or _anything_."

Yana eyed the low-tech engineering wonder a moment, and then shifted strange eyes to the back of _Wedge Antilles_?

Staring at this renaissance architecture with _giddy excitement_?

He flashed a smile, "Isn't that neat?"

But he did a double-take when he saw her expression, and he quickly cooled his excitement about the archway. He shrugged guilty, grinned bashfully, and dashed his head. "I guess I should admit I didn't just bring you here because I thought you'd like it." His eyes returned to the archway in continued interest. "I've always wanted to see the place." His eyes scanned over the perfect seams of fine-cut stone. "My um..." he half-turned to her, embarrassed, "My senior project in secondary school was on this building."

Her disbelief deepened. Yana lowered chin and scrunched her brows.

Wedge looked sheepish to admit it. "I wanted to be an architect when I grew up."

She blinked back.

"Yeah, I know. It's dumb." He shrugged it off and turned to continue their stroll.

Yana stepped quickly up to stop him by the elbow. When Wedge looked back, she tightened one eye a little more. _Really?_

His answer was a hard plea, "Don't tell the Rogue Group guys. I'll never live it down."

She coughed a little voice out of her smile. She shook her head slowly, eying him hard, and signed. _'Not dumb.'_

Brown eyes shined. "No?"

And greed gems glittered back. She shook her head.

He shifted his feet. "What did you want to be when you grew up?"

She rolled her eyes and flushed, and she signed it by spelling out all the letters. _'Interplanetary Cultural Anthropologist._ '

His smile glowed with wonder... and then his eyes flicked up and away with an idea. He angled his head, tightened his eyes, and peeked down at her. "Y'know what?"

She flicked her chin. _What?_

"I can't think of any reason _anyone_ would want to hack a speech implant for an Interplanetary Cultural Anthropologist."

Unable to fight a giggle, she rolled her eyes.

He touched his mouth with his fingers in mock deep thought. "I wonder... on what system you could find a career doing something like that?"

 _This_ one, of course. As Yana chuckled at his insinuation, she gave him a scolding eye and wagging finger.

Wedge dropped the act and spread his hands with a confident smile. "Hey. you gotta give me points for trying."

Yana didn't reveal her thoughts. _Don't get greedy; you already have too many points._

With shining eyes, he offered his elbow. "Let's go see more."

Yana took his arm.

They strolled and looked and stopped and read and chatted and made silly faces. She held his elbow for a little bit, then she held his hand for a little bit. She kept peeking for expressions of boredom or impatience, but only found brown eyes full of happiness and play.

The sun was setting by the time he flew her home. He walked her into the lobby but stopped his feet on that threaded carpet long before they reached the elevators. He slid his hands into his pockets, locked his knees, and smiled goodbye. "Thank you for today."

Yana flushed and nodded. Was he going to try to kiss her? Was he going to try to come upstairs? Not even a hug? She had to admit he'd earned enough points to get him _something_.

But Wedge was smarter than that. His hands stayed in his pockets when he asked, "Dinner next week?"

Her cheeks hurt from smiling so much, but she couldn't stop.

Yana nodded.

Wedge turned his feet, eyes glittering back as long as he could manage, "Good night."

She watched him until he disappeared out the lobby doors, but then she dropped backwards like falling tower onto that old chair behind her. She smiled at the ceiling with a little squeal of glee.

Outside, Wedge climbed back into his speeder and dropped his forehead on the bars before starting it up. He sighed big, sat up, controlled his breath, and murmured through a smug little grin. "Mission success."


	41. LL6 40 Training at the Gym

They couldn't have a clearing, and they couldn't have a grinder, but there was more than one way to torture Jedi Apprentice.

At Luke's request, Raól found a super-sized gym willing to give the Jedi Order a discount on their subscription. Luke, Kess, Nik, and Tayla strolled in for the standard newbie tour of the place. It was all indoors. A half-kilometer running track ovaled around an immense collection of exercise and weight-lifting equipment, on which dozens of people were already sweating out their weekly or daily routines. That way led to an indoor swimming pool. That way led to rentable training rooms. That way was the sauna. That way was the locker room... The four of them followed the guide around, not asking much, just nodding and taking it in. Nik carried the duffel over his shoulder not yet realizing what was in it beyond everyone's exercise clothes. Tayla wanted to play on the stuff like they were climbing frames. Kess sighed a comic lament that this meant the end of her vacation from running.

Once the tour was over, Luke shooed everyone into the locker room to change, stuffed the duffel into a locker, and he shooed everyone out again.

At his lead, they gathered in an empty spot between the running oval and the exercise equipment. Luke gave Kess a specific look to remind her _she_ was a Jedi Master now, and she read his expression clearly. He started to stretch and Kess turned to teach Tayla how to do the same.

Nik simply stood there, head hanging at an angle as Kess often did, eyes rolling at what was going to happen next. He gave Luke an enticing grin. "Are you a betting man?"

Luke chuckled under his breath as he lunged into a deep stretch. "Depends on the bet." He already knew what was coming.

"If I can bench more than you can, I don't have to run."

Blonde brows lifted. Nik was nearly a whole head taller and naturally bigger in build. Luke eyed him as if considering this offer, and shrugged, "I held up an X-Wing last night so it wouldn't crush your sister into jelly. Can you bench more than that?"

Nik's shoulders slumped. "Fuck."

Luke chortled and gestured at him. "Stretch first so you don't hurt yourself."

Nik slid tightened eyes to Kess for a clue how to talk his way out of this.

She waved it off. "Don't even try. Trust me. You're wasting your time."

Nik flattened his mouth and reluctantly began to stretch.

"Can you touch your toes?" Kess dared Tayla.

Tayla flopped her chest onto her thighs and grabbed her shoes with both hands, but her eyes were out at the equipment. "Which one we gonna do first?"

Kess pointed the other direction, to the running oval. "That one."

"Just run? What we need this place for? We can do that in the street!"

"We start with running. Fun stuff comes after."

Luke jogged ahead with Nik. Kess jogged behind with Tayla. The girl was having fun with it at first, hopping around and practically dancing back and forth as she ran, but she tired towards the end of the first lap. She tried to stop, heaving dramatically.

Kess just turned to jog backwards and shook her head with a grin. "Come on. We're not done."

"What? We did the whole thing!"

"We're gonna do two."

The top of Tayla's body swayed like a reluctant weed in the wind, but she ducked in to keep going. By the end of the second lap, she was gasping for air and dragging her feet like she was wearing shoes of concrete. Nik was in no better condition. The men finished first, but Nik immediately set his hands on his knees and heave at the floor to catch his breath. Without keeping up their own exercise for five months, Luke and Kess weren't entirely unaffected by it, but they had an easier time of recovery.

Tayla rolled onto a padded mat and spread her arms and legs spread eagle to groan for air. "You cheated. I don't got no energy for the fun part now."

Nik sat down on the mat nearby her and draped his elbows over an up-turned knee, concentrating to calm his breath. He probably didn't realize how red his face was.

Kess grinned but let them be. Instead, she rolled her shoulders back and looked over at Luke for the next move. Yet Luke's eyes were sneaking out at the crowds on the machines. Kess sensed out. They were being watched.

It took a second, but she observed that it was just curiosity; no ill-intent, no hate. The Jedi had been recognized by several people out there, and all were keeping a half-eye on the little group to see if they'd witness any parlor tricks.

 _Good luck with that_ , Kess thought, and turned her attentions back to Luke for the next direction.

He stood his full height and half-turned her way, but his eyes remained on the machine floor. He murmured, "Go get the duds."

Grinning deeper, Kess arched her brow. _"Really?"_

His eyes scraped the crowd, and he grinned a little by the time his eyes landed on her again. "I'm thinking about something you said once. And I'm wondering if a little PR might earn us a free subscription to this place."

Now both brows were in her forehead. "You want to put on a show?"

He waggled his head back and forth and corrected her. "I want to _spar_. And this is the only place we have right now. But if a little sparring can double-duty as another expense saved..." He shrugged.

Kess rocked back on her heals to turn back for the locker room. "As you wish."

She returned with two plain hilts in her hands and strolled to where Luke had gathered the apprentices. He secured an open mat towards the back end of the equipment area, near the back curve of the running oval. Tayla and Nik sat side by side on the edge of it but Luke was still on his feet. As much as Nik resisted the running, his adrenaline was pumping now. "So? What's next?"

Luke unlatched his lightsaber from his belt and handed it down to the man. "Hold this for me."

Nik looked at it, turned his eyes up at Luke to see if the man was serious, smirked, and took it. Luke added with a stern index finger. "Just 'hold it'." He flashed a smile. Nik shrugged and set it in his lap.

Kess too took off hers and handed it to Tayla with a similar order. "Don't turn it on."

Tayla looked it over with wild interest. "Why not?"

"Because I'm not in the mood to carry your ass to the emergency room today." Kess said and turned away from the two. She walked backwards across the mat, already watching Luke's every move. r Over his shoulder, Luke eyed her back as he stepped to the other corner. They spread themselves four metres apart. Kess flipped one hilt in her left hand, then flipped the other in her right and motioned to toss it to him when he was ready.

A grin spread across his mouth when he put his hands out for it. The hilt flew across the space and flared alive the moment it hit his palm, instantly flashing back and forth in big circles beside each of his shoulders in one lightning fast maneuver.

 _Show off_. Kess set her feet and unlocked her knees. She settled the hilt in both palms and lit it up without showing off about it. She watched Luke's bright eyes, but she sensed out to the rest of the room too. _Well, they're sure as hell watching us now._

Maybe this was better for them, Luke thought. She was distracted by the crowd, and she should have been entirely focused on her opponent. They hadn't sparred in months so, truthfully, this was good for them both.

They began to circle each other-

"Woah! Woah! Woah!" A gym monitor stepped up with both palms out and cut the mat between them. His face was stern. "We don't want anyone to get hurt. You're going to have to put those things away."

Luke straightened on locked knees but didn't disengage the lightsaber. "These are practice blades." He motioned over to where Nik and Tayla had the real ones. Nik held it up for the monitor to see.

Kess took a few steps closer as well. She sent out her intent to Luke and he reached his right arm out to the side. Kess sliced down and bopped him on the forearm, after which he wriggled his fingers in the air and showed his undamaged hand to the monitor.

Kess turned to stroll back toward her corner to wait out the rest of the argument. Luke bit his lip and lunged fast to whap her in the ass with his blade. She yelped and spun, holding her butt cheek with her palm. Luke grinned, smug, and shrugged at the gym monitor. "No one's going to get hurt."

The gym monitor stepped backwards as he scolded. "We'll see. But if I call it, you _stop_."

"Willco," Luke agreed with a fervent nod, and stepped back to his place. "Just keep everyone out of the way.

As the gym monitor settled to watch from the edge of the mat, several patrons came around to stand and watch with him. Luke and Kess steadied on wide feet again, eyeing each other again, and paused to smirk. But it wasn't the crowd and it wasn't the spar that fueled the smirk; it was last night's sex. That harmonious thrill of absolute connection pulsed in their veins as if they'd just finished. Kess was no longer distracted by the crowd.

This was going to be _fun_.

 _Stomp, stomp, CLASH!_ White blades sliced the air. Sneakers danced across the padded mat. Dodge. Duck. Parry. Cuss. Smirk. Try not to chuckle. Crash, crash... crash, crash, crash... fancy little spin around the shoulders while returning to corner position. Dart across. Use Force Pull on just one foot and leap over to slice across the mid-section as the other fell flat on their back with laughter... Then put out a palm to help them up.

Back to your places.

They couldn't deny it if they tried: Luke and Kess were having a good time. They sparred for about a half an hour, almost taking exact turns on who was winning, and the crowd gathered at the edges with enough interest that they each seemed to collect their own cheering squad.

They could have gone for hours longer, but didn't want to do that with all the people standing around. Both thought about heading back out to Iktri so they could play alone sometime soon. The white blades shrank away as they approached each other with completion, and some of the crowd applauded.

"Hey Skywalker?" A Mirialan man called from the small, standing audience.

Luke looked over.

The Mirialan angled his head. His green-gray skin and smoke-colored eyes observed the Jedi with mature curiosity. "How does one apply?"

Brows knitted. Luke glanced to Kess and back at the man. "Apply what?"

The Mirialan gestured at Nik and Tayla still sitting on the side, both still holding the real lightsaber hilts like squires. "For an apprenticeship."

Kess's brows popped into her wet bangs. Luke angled his head more, fought a grin, and blindly handed the practice hilt to Kess the same moment Kess blindly took it from him. She chortled silently to watch Luke stroll to the side to talk to the guy.

Kess turned away, eyes shining on his back, happy to see him happy, and strolled over to Nik and Tayla to take the real hilts back.

"Do we get to play like that now?" Tayla asked

Kess shook her head. "There's an exercise you guys have to be good at first. And we're going to have to take you Iktri for the first bunch of those lessons. But soon." Kess eyed Tayla and nodded this as a promise, handing the girl the practice hilts as she did. "And the more you meditate, the sooner it will be."

"Cool." Tayla said quietly and smiled big, looking over the practice hilt with interest.

Nik's eyes were on Luke and the crowd sneaking closer to listen to him talk with the Mirialan. "Doesn't look like we're going to get much else done today anyway."

Kess flicked her head for Nik to go. "Go bench something. Tayla and I are going to learn how to do some dumb bells. Let him get this PR business out of the way."

Nik hopped to his feet. "What do you want us to do with these?" He opened his palm with the practice hilt still in it.

Kess took it out of his hand, met his eye with smug sibling rivalry, and blindly latched it to a loop on his exercise pants. "Might as well get used to having one in the way." She helped Tayla hook the other on her little belt loop too; the thing was nearly as long as the girl's thigh, but Tayla strutted proudly to have it there.

Luke spent the next hour talking with the Mirialan and the on-staff manager of the gym itself. Two others hovered close for the duration of it as if they, too, wanted to apply for apprenticeship. Kess merely glanced over and smiled in love to find Luke calmly managing his eagerness at all these potentials showing up.

When they went back to the locker room to change and go home, Tayla was alive and chatty, Nik was quiet and pleasant, and Luke murmured through a smug little grin. "So, _Jedi Lendra_ , looks like I have a new project for you, if you want it." He met her eyes. His were sparkling.

"What's that?"

He pointed at the practice hilt hanging off of Nik's hip. "We need to make more of those."

She smiled from ear to ear and nodded. "How many do you want?"

He thought for a second, pulling off a T-shirt and tossing it aside so he could pull his tunic over his shoulders. "Maybe... fifteen?" He winked.

Kess chuckled and rolled her eyes at the number. He was suggesting 'home-bred' apprentices instead of 'walk-ins', just to nudge her about it. She let it slide. "Is that guy a potential?"

"I don't know yet. He's going to come by the office next week," Luke said. "We have to figure out a way to test them." After that, Luke was lost in deep thought.

Kess protected him to do just that. She engaged Nik and Tayla in small talk as they finished changing, discussing what to make for dinner tonight. Tayla finished first and slumped on the little bench to wait for the others, elbows on her knees, face drooped in her palms, trying to suggest ice cream was a suitable dinner menu. Nik was distracted by the growing trepidation of this afternoon's ritual of sending an unanswered vidcomm.

Kess secretly suspected she and Luke would spend the rest of the afternoon brainstorming ideas on how to test people for Force Sensitivity. Not having a sure way to test someone was an unspoken thorn in Luke's side.

 _Tayla_.

Tayla sat up, green eyes wide.

Kess turned around with ears open.

Luke's attention popped up from his shoe.

Nik's eyes noticed the other three suddenly paying attention to nothing specific, and so he paid attention to _them_.

"What?" Tayla said to nothing.

 _Don't forget about that dead garden._ The man's voice was smooth and calm, grinning and quiet.

Luke stared at the air. "Are you going to tell us how to find it?"

Kess listened.

They heard a chuckle and a near groan of a Master's friendly disappointment. _You don't need me to tell you how to find it._

Luke flattened his mouth and glanced at Kess.

Kess arched a brow. "Are you going to tell us your _name_?"

 _When you get there,_ he promised lightly, and he was gone.

Tayla popped off the stool. "So you guys _can_ hear him too!"

"Yeah, when he's _talking_ to us," Kess told her.

Nik shifted his eyes. "What just happened?"

Luke flicked his chin at Nik. "Did you meditate this morning?"

The grown man's face dipped into a slightly childish pout.

Luke smiled as he made his point. "And _that's_ why you didn't hear him."

Nik leered an eye over at Kess. "Is it inappropriate to flip off your own Jedi Master?"

Kess shrugged as she turned back to the locker for her boots. "I do it all the time."


	42. LL6 41 Mama Rancor

Kess woke up long before morning for no good reason. She tried to sleep longer, dozing in an out, but her eyes kept drifting open to see a bedroom bathed in a dim purple light. It was a neon sign, Luke and Kess once investigated to learn, a big one, hanging high above the street and just out of sight from their window, but close enough that the light from it bled crossways through the window. Solid purple with trims of white; a used speeder salesman. The only time it became noticeable was in the middle of the night when a healthy portion of all the other businesses shut down their lights, leaving the purple and white to stand out as one of few still alive in the blackness.

Kess once joked that it was kind of neat to have the purple light for it would help the mood during Luke's 'training' in bed.

She rolled over.

He slept in perfect peace. His hair was in his eyes. His face half smashed into the pillow. His lightsaber rested sideways on the bed table behind him as if it was sleeping too. For a moment she grinned at the purity of this peaceful bliss; that waking up next to him was not only normal now, but was also the plan for the rest of time.

She closed her eyes and meditated, just 'cuz, sensing out to the world around her. A couple was having a fight a few floors below, but it wasn't going to descend into violence. A woman was sitting in an alley outside desperate to figure out how she was going to acquire another hit. Police were bored on their watch, watching the chrono until they could go home and get back to bed. An employee tried to wake up as she unlocked the back door of her caffeine bar and started turning on the brewing equipment.

Closer by, Nik began to struggle with another nightmare.

Kess quietly climbed out of bed and tiptoed out, closing their bedroom door so none of this would wake Luke. She helped herself into her brother's bedroom and sat by his side. For a moment, she just sensed out to learn: water, drowning, no air. Then she reached her hand over to rest her fingertips on his brow. She reached into his busy mind to sooth that tiny knot that was causing the nightmare, like massaging a cramped muscle. Horrors that flared up like this were similar to that of a damaged muscle. It was like a charlie horse of the mind, causing PTSD episodes or nightmares. It could only heal when it was at rest... but how often is the mind truly at rest? Meditation wasn't a religious practice, not like everyone thought. Meditation was just a way to let the mind take a break so it was ready for whatever was next. It sure as hell didn't rest when the rest of the body was asleep.

Nik relaxed and sunk back into REM sleep. Kess patted his arm and tiptoed out of his room.

And just because she was up, she snuck a peek into Tayla's room too. The girl's body splayed across the bed like she was trying to take up the whole thing. Her tiny snores released in little whistles. So cute! Kess smiled. She sensed out to learn if The Nice Man was whispering things at the girl in her sleep, but all was quiet. Still, Kess was concerned. So far he'd done nothing but good things, but Kess still didn't entirely trust it because she didn't entirely understand it. And every time she thought about it, a visceral rage threatened to erupt. Kess was beginning to notice that her mind more and more frequently wandered into a fear that The Nice Man might someday cause Tayla harm. It was new: this strong reactive instinct to guard the child from danger, and it wanted to nudge Kess to the dark side like...

... like a Mama Rancor.

"Oh crap," Kess gave herself a self-depreciating smile as the Master in her helped the Apprentice in her learn where the problem truly was. She closed the bedroom door and turned away, remembering Luke from earlier today, suggesting she make enough practice hilts for all the apprentice babies he wanted her to breed. In truth, he would be satisfied with one or two, maybe three. The tease of wanting fifteen of them was just an old joke to poke fun at her. She crossed the silent living room thinking about it. Mama Rancor. Kess was _afraid_ of babies. She was afraid of what instinctive dark sided shit she might do to protect them.

She hitched a grin at the old adage, 'a woman can turn any man to the dark side', and she thought, _Yeah well, you threaten a woman's child enough to bring out Mama Rancor, and Darth Vader'll seem like a walk in the park._

Not tired enough to go back to bed, not stressed about anything that needed unraveling right now, not fretting about anything in particular, just... thoughtful. Kess wandered into the office, patted the dome of sleeping Artoo, and sat down at the cluttered desk.

First, she dug through to find the schematic for the dud sabers and started a shopping list. Then, feeling giddy about the idea of smelling a hot solder gun again, she searched online shopping sites for remotes with variable settings so kids could practice with a lighter disciplinary sting when they missed a block. That led to shopping for an energy-absorbent mat she could hang up as a curtain so they could practice in their own living room without damaging the transparisteel windows.

Too careful not to spend money for the last five months, mainly because she didn't know how much they had and knew they needed to save every credit for the more expensive and more important Academy construction, Kess allowed herself a moment to 'window shop' without regard of cost. Some of this stuff they likely already had in the material donations, but until she had a list she wouldn't know what to look for. Now, she went happily mad. It was only a list anyway. She wasn't actually ordering anything.

Gentle lights and white noise machines to make _any_ room a meditation room. A simple lockable cabinet to keep unused lightsabers away from too-curious hands. Sand cubes and small soft toys for practicing telekinesis without accidentally knocking someone over the head with a rock. Belts with D-rings so the apprentices could get used to having a lightsaber on their hips even if it was only a dud.

She sat back and looked at her list for a long moment... then sat up and shopped some more.

Map scanners. Sketch pads. Seismic testers. Flood lights. GPS markers. Infrared distance measures... She racked her brain. What else did archaeologists use research an ancient site?

Too bad Gina wasn't here. Grade-school teacher she may be, but for the sister-in-law get her degree in history, Gina probably had to take a class in exactly this subject. Reaching out to Gina for help though; that was a bad idea, at least for right now. Mama Rancor deserved a little space to protect her baby from what she felt was a threat of danger: the Jedi. Kess began to understand...

 _Blip_.

Mail. Kess reached over and hit the key to see what it was. Amongst the dozens of read messages, one bold line stood out at the top.

 **TO: Jedi Home, Jedi Office FR: Tyrona Iktri Delegation RE: Response to Iktri power proposal.**

Kess sat up and punched the key. Brown eyes widened to dance across the screen...

A minute later, Kess sat down on the side of the bed and looked at Luke's sleeping face bathed in purple light. She brushed the back of her fingers on his forearm until he sniffed and blinked and slowly woke up. He licked his mouth, rolled to his back, and shoved his elbows behind him with a sleep squint. "Ws goin' on?"

For a beat, she just sat there, smiling softly, and let him wake up a little more. He did his usual routine of sensing out for danger, glancing around to check his surroundings, rub his face, comb his fitful hair from his face with his fingers, and sat up more until his elbows were in his lap. Finally, a little more awake, he looked her in the eye and asked again. "What's the matter?"

Kess whispered it, but her soul was shouting it loud. "They said _'yes'_."

* * *

Gina Lendra sat in her dark living room and stared at the air. Kicking Nik out had one very severe unforeseen consequence that Gina realized too late. No Nik meant No-Nik-Paycheck. And No-Nik-Paycheck meant No-Mortgage-Payment. She explained the situation to the School Master and pleaded to be reinstated before the disciplinary suspension was over, but the damage was already done. They were living too close to the wire to float a half month with no income, followed by an indefinite number of months with only one income. And only the measly primary school teacher's pay at that.

Her first thought was to take on a second job, but who would take care of Ben? Especially when he needed his own parents the most right now. She frantically began cancelling everything they could live without: newsnet subscription, sand-shoveling service, speeder repair. She shut down the air-conditioning most of the time and used strategically placed fans instead. She pulled out Nik's toolbox and removed every other bulb in any lamp that had more than one. She avoided going to the market and made use of every mismatched ingredient in the back of the cupboard. She had arranged a counseling service for Ben but cancelled it before they made it to their first appointment.

After a few weeks of this, sitting in her dark, hot, empty living room, with both stomachs grumbling, and the sound of Ben absently playing with his fighters in his bedroom, using the light of a desk lamp set on corner of the floor... Gina finally faced the math that all these efforts were too little, too late.

She racked her brain for people she could go to for help. Not Nik. Not yet. Not Kess. She was too embarrassed by this. No mom. She had barely enough left in her retirement to feed herself. Not her father-in-law. Even if she did happen to find him sober for the asking, there would be strings attached to the help. The last thing Ben needed was what would be attached to those strings.

She considered Leia's offer, but what good would that do them if they lost their house in the process. What would they come back to?

Gina felt like a mountain was slowly crushing her into the sand. She shriveled tightly into the corner of the couch and tried her damndest not to cry loud enough to alert her fragile son. But her son was beginning to learn skills on his own that she was only vaguely starting to understand.

He seemed distracted by his toys right now, quiet in the corner under that desk lamp on the floor, barely visible around the edge of the door, so Gina tried to keep her tears quiet.

After a few minutes, Ben started a big fight between the fighter toys, shouting as if to play the roles of both Imperial and Rebel pilots wanting to kill each other. So enraged by his own imagination, he threw one fighter hard against the wall until it crashed and broke. He stood to his feet and balled his fists by his ears. He growled out loud and scared and angry. "AAAARRRGGG! It's so noisy! To noisy! Quiet! BE QUIEEETT!"

Gina launched off the couch and rushed in, falling on the floor by his side. She wrapped her arms around his tense body. Ben curled to a ball in her arms, yelling at the demons in his head. "Stop talking! Stop talking! It's too heavy! Get it off me! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!"

Gina wrapped herself around him and held his crying face to her breast, shushing him softly as she herself tightly cried in fear and panic and pressure too.

Ben's anger melded into heart wrenching cries. "Where is dad? I want my dad? Where's my daddy? It's too noisy! It's too heavy! I want my daaaaaadddyyyyyyy." His yelling dribbled to a whimpering sobs and then to intelligible whispers.

Gina held him for a long silent time in the dark. Rocking him and shushing him softly, whispering nonsensical condolences into his blond hair. Eventually, he cried and screamed himself into exhaustion and Gina carried his snoozing body to bed, but he still whimpered and pleaded. "I want my daddy."

She sat with him for a long time, and eventually went to bed herself, but she didn't go to sleep. Gina lay awake all night long, staring at nothing in the darkness.

When the suns finally came up and glowed bright into the bedroom, amplifying the empty bed next to her... Gina climbed out of bed, made a strong cup of java, and forced herself to make the toughest comm call of her life.


	43. LL6 42 A Day in the Life of the LC

A soft gong.

Draped in fine robes of velvet and silk, the Lord Chamberlain stood upon the high spire over a well-behaved and standing-room-only Senate Chamber. "This concludes the debate over the duration and term limits for the roles of Party Whips, Committee Leaders, and Lord Chamberlain." Leia ticked off notes on her console and lifted her chin again to command the next step. "I now call the vote. Office duration of six years, with a three-term limit. Yeah or Nay." She flipped the switched and stepped back.

Green and red lights began to flash alive throughout the room.

Ren sat calmly in the smaller chair to her right, watching with expressionless interest, as he always did. Questah sat in the smaller chair to her left, frequently jotting down notes and making any comm calls during the proceedings, as she always did.

Leia sat down in the big chair between them, crossed her legs, and awaited the vote. This part was all her. The Emperor and the Chancellors who commanded this spire before him all had the habit to remain standing during a vote, but Leia felt it important that she remove herself as an influence. To her, voting was a sacred ritual, not to be messed with outside of the strict and fair rules established a democratic government. Her job was to facilitate fair and safe debate and democracy, not subversively influence the results.

The problem with this symbolic respect was that many publically smeared her for it. Pundits and press claimed the pregnant woman was sitting down every chance she got to rest her swollen feet. This spurred rumors about her struggling health, that a human pregnancy alone was too much for any Lord Chamberlain to have to handle. Every sip of water or soft clearing of her throat were blasted across the right wing media so that 'caring' Imperials could question her ability to complete her term in office. Already, powerful Senators were vying to run to replace her as soon as Leia stepped down.

But there was only one person Leia would support to take her place, and until Senator Mon Mothma announced she was running for the seat, no one would know Leia's thoughts on the matter.

Leia had only seen Mon Mothma once since her rise to Lord Chamberlain, but they both understood the need for such strict communication. To strengthen the role, Leia had to appear un-swayed by the primary political parties. As such, her contact with Mon Mothma had to be balanced by the exact number of contacts with Grand Moff Jakobi, and Leia hated that man. The three of them were present at a political reception a few weeks ago, when a host of new Senators reported to their seats by free elections on their home systems. Under the watchful eyes of the press, Leia bowed respectfully and chatted lightly with Grand Moff Jakobi and, later that same evening, performed the same stale ritual with Senator Mon Mothma.

Yet before the evening was over, when many were swirling the floor to leave, Mon Mothma and Leia 'accidentally' stood near each other to greet the others goodbye, at which Mon Mothma uttered a joke behind a sip of her wine. "How's your feet?"

Leia fought not to laugh before someone caught her expression of humor.

Backchannels. That's where it all happened. And Questah was a key link in that chain. She carried a burner datalink on her person at all times, one that connected to one and only one aide in Mon Mothma's office. The links listed no names, no response came the same day as the sent message, and all text was painfully vague.

1 Are you running?

0 You'll be the first to know.

0 Are you asking me to?

1 When the time comes.

0 Earlier than later?

1 You'll be the first to know.

0 Stay healthy. That's an order.

1 MTFBWY, too.

Stepping into her office chambers after a Senate Session was always a bit of a circus. Threepio helped to remove her robes while aides stood by with reports and awaited instruction. Comments were as quick and succinct as the answers, all while Leia sighed with relief to be out from under the heavy robe and kicked her shoes off her swollen feet.

"...and Commander Antilles of Division One is in the lobby, but he doesn't have an appointment."

Yana kept her eyes on her datapad and tried to keep them there, but realized that Leia had already assessed her response and dismissed it entirely. "Do I have anything coming up?"

Winter shook her head. "Labor Union, but not for another hour."

Leia toed her shoes back on. "Questah, can you prepare a report for me on the special project in a few minutes?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Yana, would you like to join me?"

Yana lifted her eyes and shook her head, shrugging clueless... making a poor show of _pretending_ to be clueless.

Leia grinned at the woman and stepped the length of the office common with Ren and Winter naturally at her flanks. Out in the public hall, Leia made a u-turn to the waiting area where Commander Antilles was sitting and reading a padfolio on his knee. He glanced to find her, tossed the folio aside, and scrambled to stand at an easy attention.

Wedge grinned, bowed, and greeted her brightly. "Good evening, Lord Chamberlain."

Leia clasped her hands together in front of her. "What can I do for you, Wedge?"

His eyes shifted oddly to Winter and back to Leia. He shook his head. "I don't have an appointment."

Leia offered with a gesture. "But I have a few minutes. Would you like to come in?"

"Um..." He thought hard on that, squinting at her for a beat, then blurted it. "No, thank you."

Her chin lifted up. Her mouth opened a different kind of grin. And her chin dropped down. "Ah." Her brow arched. "You're not here for me, are you?"

Wedge scrunched his face until one eye winked and the other eye peeked as if guilty. He shook his head. "No offense."

"None taken." She said and smartly turned her feet to return to business. Her voice carried an extra layer of insinuation. "Have a lovely evening."

"Thank you. You too." Wedge sat back down to continue his wait.

As if she were the first fighter in wing formation, Leia marched back across the office common with Ren and Winter securely at each hip. A few of the aides stood from their desks as she passed, but she didn't look at anyone, not even Yana, when she ordered, "Miss Dietrich, you can go home now."

Yana bit her lips closed, torn between embarrassment, glee, and guilt to step away from her duties before she was truly 'done for the day'.

Questah gave her a sympathetic grin and a shrug. Yana's eyes followed the Lord Chamberlain back to her office at the end of the hall. Winter sat down. Ren stood at attention next to the other Purple Guard detail, and Leia took a datapad from Threepio before glancing back to Yana again.

" _Go_ ," she grinned lovingly. "Have an enjoyable evening."

Yana gave in, sighed with distress, and turned to gather her tote. Questah stepped to the Lord Chamberlain with her special report, but Leia gestured an index finger for Questah to wait. Brown eyes snuck glances from the datapad until Yana was entirely gone from the office common.

Instantly, Leia launched to new business. She tossed this datapad onto Winter's desk. "Comm Senator Handel and tell him no." She turned to Questah and took another datapad from her hand. "And get me the RSVP list for the Senate Ball." She kicked off her shoes as she read and turned to her office. Questah caught up quickly and followed her in. "Close the door."

Questah closed the door.

Leia sat down on one of her guest couches as she read but Questah remained standing, waiting.

"Okay. This looks good. Well done." Leia handed back the datapad and met Questah in the eye. "Have Threepio put together a meal plan. Float the idea of a governess. Set up interviews with in-home tutors. Get her a credit account and a budget. Take the mortgage payment out of my personal accounts for now. When are they arriving?"

"Tomorrow night. 1700."

"Am I free for it?"

Questah shook her head.

"Alright. You're my ombudsman. Handle it, let me know what you need, and get me an evening at Luke and Kess's so I can report this to Nik in person."

"May I ask?"

"Of course."

"Why isn't Yana assigned this? Not that I mind, but she's closer to family than I am."

"Because right now, out of respect to Yana, I don't want to compromise her with information she _can't_ share with her best friend. Until Miss Lendra says otherwise, the only thing the Jedi get to know is that they're here."

Questah's eyes flicked.

Leia realized the same thing and chuckled. "Perhaps we should start referring to the other Miss Lendra as Miss Lendra-Skywalker, just to keep them straight."

"Is she going to take the name?"

"I don't really care. Is that the Ball RSVPs?" Leia stood and stepped away without reaching for it.

"Yes, ma'am."

Leia sat down at her desk, already multitasking. "How many did Yana RSVP?"

Questah strolled closer as she flicked through the list. "Um. One."

"Put her down for two, please." Leia's eyes were on her screen, already doing something else. "And don't tell her about that either."

Questa nodded and took a note. "I'll need a name."

"I'll give you a name before the ball happens." Eyes smiled over.

Questah began to grin too. "Can I guess?"

"You can guess, but you can't write it down. Don't want to jinx it."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Thank you. You can leave the door open."

Questah turned away with the notes and left the door open. Threepio and Winter came in.

Leia lifted her chin at them. "What's next?"


	44. LL6 43 Andee Myr

Nik didn't like this building, but he knew he was going to have to find a way to get over it. Kess was quietly happy this morning and Luke was ready to take on the galaxy, but Nik was silent as he walked into the Senate Dome for the first time since he gave up the title of Emperor.

The Jedi Office. Four private desks, a conference room, a tiny back hall and restroom, and a common big enough for three more desks and a secretary. The furniture was used, the walls naked, and the crated supplies disorganized in stacks inside a private offices as though it was a storage closet. Somehow, the lack of creature comforts made Nik more comfortable. The Jedi Order felt like a start-up company.

Raól set him up in the third private office and gave him codes for terminal and comm access. Kess pointed out there was a java machine in back and cold sweetwater in the mini fridge. Luke disappeared for a minute and came back to Nik's desk with a stack of datacards.

Overwhelmed already, Nik set his elbows on the armrests and clasped his fingers together in front of his stomach, causing his big shoulders to slouch. He murmured a half a joke. "Is it my turn to say it yet?" When Luke glanced at him, Nik said it anyway. "I have a bad feeling about this."

" _I_ don't." Luke stressed. He sat down in Nik's guest chair and started going through the data cards. "You got us approved on power facilities. Let's see how far you can get." He handed over cards as he identified them. Water systems. Comm systems. Landing pad... "And here's the plans they approved for power. Get construction started as soon as you can. Run the budget approval through Raól."

Nik took the stuff and nodded, still uncertain.

Luke stood up and eyed him with a grin. "Think of it this way, the sooner we get these up and running, the sooner we can get the building construction started, means the sooner Gina and Ben can be convinced to move out with us."

Nik pressed his mouth in vague appreciation, sighed through his nose, and nodded.

Luke began to leave, but poked his head back in to order. "Meditate."

This time, Nik grinned genuinely. "Yes, master."

In the office common, Luke's feet were fast to the near-empty desk where Kess was browsing a report. "Well?"

"Looks like... I'll need..." She checked off items from the list and calculated the rest in her head, and cringed, "About three hundred credits." Her eyes turned up to him. "Let me go through the list again and shave off the non-essentials."

With a reluctant press of his mouth, he nodded. "How many duds did you calculate for?"

Kess grinned with tight humor. "Four."

"Makes six?" His eye inquired the reason for that particular number.

She counted off on her fingers. "If we all practiced at once: You, me, Nik, Tayla, Leia, and Ben. For the first round, I only want to make enough to get us started so I can work out any kinks I run into." She shook her head to assure, "It won't be the last time I make them."

He smirked, "It better not be," and turned to check in with Raól.

"The Mandalorians cancelled their request. The Ishtarians asked for an appeal. The Lord Chamberlain wants you to host for dinner at your house as soon as you can. And the Barnun Gym has donated a free subscription for anyone in the Jedi Order for the next ten months."

Luke clopped his palms together and smiled big. "Thank you."

"Um," Raól considered if he wanted to mention this or not, "May I add a note to the dud saber project?"

Kess glanced up. Luke shifted his feet. "Any time."

Raól looked across the common to Kess "You can afford it."

She motioned to her work. "This isn't just dud saber stuff, though."

"You can afford it," Raól repeated.

Luke patted his palm at air, "We need to save as much as we can for construction. It's not going to be cheap."

Raól tried to argue, "Yes, but-

Luke hiked a minor whine. "Last week when we were talking about the meditation chamber design you told us to be careful."

The man nodded deeply and met Luke's eyes with equal strength. "And do you know what's happened since then?"

Luke shifted his chin, bracing himself.

"You guys kept an X-Wing from falling on a crowded dance club, handed your lightsaber to an apprentice who used it to capture the terrorist but _not_ kill him, and the whole thing was _caught on camera_."

Kess shifted in her chair. "And this resulted in...?"

Raól widened his eyes to stress the words and waved his hand in front of Luke's face as if that would help make his point. " _You can afford it_." He laughed lightly at his fake Force Persuade.

Luke pretended to blink dumbly, turned to Kess with a wrinkled brow, and said. "Y'know what? I think we can afford it."

Kess laughed in love at him. Luke turned back to Raól. "Tell Leia to give us a good date for the dinner, but in return she has to set aside an entire Benduday to come with us to Iktri." His brows wiggled deviously.

"You got it."

Luke started to go back to his office, but paused again. "That reminds me." He stepped to Nik's open office and hovered in the doorway so he could talk to both Nik and Kess at once. "I want you guys to start brainstorming ways we can test new apprentices for Force Sensitivity. Not just ways we can test their abilities, but also a questionnaire or application or something."

Nik scrunched his brow. "How will a questionnaire help?"

"If we word the questions right, we'll weed out the tourists who just want to play with lightsabers or get a free meal ticket."

"Ah."

Luke started to walk away but popped back into Nik's office with a pointed finger. "You let me know if you get stuck." Luke did _not_ want this project to hiccup any further.

"Give me a chance, here. I just sat down."

Luke nodded and stepped out, pointing at Kess as he marched eagerly back to his own office. "And _you_ can set up tech shop right on that desk if you want." He turned his back and called a smile. "I want to be smelling solder by the end of the day!"

Kess wondered if maybe they should get the man a fake General Quarters alarm so he'd have something to annoy them with on days like this. "Hey, farm boy!" Kess returned powerfully.

Luke twitched and shot back a look.

She winked a suggestive grin, "Decaf."

The man shook his head, chuckling quietly, and rummaged across his desktop for notes. He came out again in moments, and hooked his head around Nik's door on his way out. "Is it inappropriate to flip off your own wife?"

Nik shrugged. "I do it all the time."

Kess peeked from her datapad to see if Luke would really do it, and he swiveled his heals to the main door with a glittering eye as if he was about to, but the door opened before he could raise his hand.

The Mirialan man from the gym walked in.

Luke tucked his stuff into one arm so he could step up and give a quick bow. "Andee. Welcome. Glad you could come by. How much time do you have?"

"I have to be at work in a few hours."

Luke nodded and motioned back to Kess. "I'll be back in a half; I have a meeting. Are you comfortable to hang out with Jedi Lendra for a while?"

"With honor."

As Luke stepped out the main door, stretched his neck until he got Kess's attention, and held up two fingers. "Make two more." His eyes gestured to the Mirialan's back. Already, her count wasn't enough practice duds.

Luke left, Raól got to work, and Andee Myr strolled hesitantly across the common where Kess motioned him to pull up a chair. They introduced each other as he sat down and Kess shared the details of her little project with him as they got to know each other a little.

Andee Myr wasn't sure if he was Force Sensitive, but he did have Jedi Heritage in the family. Of course, connection with his Great Aunt was lost when she was adopted by the Order as a child, but they knew enough to follow her career a little. According to family lore, one of her Padawans became one of the Masters the last Jedi Council.

"Oh?" Kess asked as she browsed the uplink for decent parts stores. "Do you know a name?"

"My Great Aunt was Jedi Master Cyslin Myr. And her Padawan became Jedi Master Mace Windu."

Kess's smile flicked over. "Isn't that the one who tried to stop Palpatine?"

"Um, yes. That one."

"Nice resume."

Andee Myr had no training in fine electronics, and he wasn't overly interested in the dud lightsaber project, but he was attentive and mildly curious about all this. By the time Luke returned from his meeting, Kess was ready to go shopping and collecting her things, Nik leaned a shoulder on his office door to await Luke's attention, Raól swiveled his chair to hand a datapad of notes on the next meeting, and Andee Myr popped from his chair as if to report in.

Luke stopped his feet as he noticed the four of them in a different light. His eyes bounced from one to the next, causing his grin to spread deeper as he went.

A _team_. A whole Jedi _team_.

Kess pulled on her jacket, glowing at him for glowing like that. She knew exactly what he was giddy about today. "Comm me if you need me to pick up anything else."

Luke he nodded as she left and turned his eyes to Nik.

"Do you have time to look at the water proposal?"

Luke's brows wrinkled, "It's already done?"

"It's a _water_ system." Nik spread a palm. "I'm from Tatooine too, remember?"

Luke shrugged acceptance of that, took the datapad from Raól, and invited Andee to come and join them. As Andee watched from a respectful distance, Luke and Nik hunched over the brochure of the hybrid design and its capabilities. Most of the work would be done by a vaporator and a rain collector, with a thin vein ready to suck in creek water in the drier periods only as a back-up system. And to keep from digging into the precious earth more than necessary, Nik suggested they fit it with a small water tower instead of the usual underground tank.

Luke patted a strong palm on Nik's shoulder. "Great. Take it over. Hit the At-Bintarians first because I went to the Tyronans first last time."

Nik blanched. "Me?"

"Yeah, sure. Why not?"

Nik wanted to point out that he was just an apprentice, just a barrel-rolling thug from a silica processing plant, but before he spoke he remembered he was also the Emperor for a minute and half, and now he had a lightsaber on his belt. (A fake one perhaps, but few people would know that.)

Luke motioned Andee Myr out of Nik's office and left with one last suggestion, a calmer, friendlier one this time. "Meditate first. Then go." He smiled, "You've got this."

Finally, Luke swirled into his own office to give a few dedicated minutes to this new potential. He wasn't embarrassed by the unkempt desk or empty walls, but he noticed through the Force how Andee glanced at all of that with a little surprise they were so disorganized.

"Too much to do and not enough people to do it," Luke commented as he set down his stuff and turned to face Andee, resting his butt on the front edge of the desk. Luke rubbed his palms. "Would you like to sit down?"

Andee shook his head. "I'm okay." He clasped his hands behind his back.

Luke noted the man's voice was always particularly quiet. His Force Print was unusually calm for a civilian. It was like he'd already been meditating regularly. But he was also a Mirialian, which meant he was deeply spiritual and connected to nature by way of culture.

"Do you have a family?"

"Um, no. My wife was killed in the Battle of Coruscant."

A touch of sadness and sympathy dipped Luke's mood. "My condolences."

"We all lost a lot in that one." Andee said as if to brush off the topic. He wasn't upset about it, but the loss was still fresh enough to need treatment. "It's what makes it important to me to make it the _last_ one."

"Agreed. What brought you to me?"

"I'm sorry?"

Luke shrugged. "Why now? Why at the gym? Why do you think you can do this? Just give me an general idea of how you found yourself in front of me today with this request."

"I see." Andee nodded at the floor to think a moment, then lifted his gray-skinned, finely-tattooed face to the Jedi Master. "I was an associate chef at The Olian, it's a ten star restaurant at the Enshisha Hotel. Good money. Good work. I enjoyed it immensely. Served there for years. But..." He pressed his gray lips mildly. "When the head chef took his leave of his position, _my_ assistant was promoted past me to become my boss."

Luke motioned Andee to sit down in a guest chair and stepped around to sit down as well, deeply interested. "He was human, I assume?"

" _She_. Yes." Andee sat down. "Dandia, that's my wife, she tried to tell me that I still had a secure career and we made enough money for a comfortable life, so 'don't mess with the airlock if you don't have to'. But it bothered me. Management tried to explain it that it was only because of the table visits. Head chefs are expected to greet special guests in the dining room, but they didn't like the optics of having a Mirialian head chef hobnob with Imperial High Command. It would 'tarnish the luster of The Olian', they said. The racism was not something I could entirely process to a comfort."

Luke nodded respect and let him continue.

"So, I held in there, living with it in silence, but when the Battle began and everything went mad, and we all realized it was the Rebellion coming -finally- to slice the head off the snake, me and several other cooks in the kitchen poured out to the dining room armed with cleavers and cast iron pans..." he sighed in little shame and a little horror, "...and went to war."

Luke pressed his mouth with sympathy and understanding.

Andee completely skipped the part of his story that covered the last five months. "I'm a short-order cook at a diner now, but at least I'm the head chef." He grinned softly. "And living in a studio in the Asansha District."

That district was practically on the other side of the planet, Luke noted. This man didn't live close.

"I considered going home to Mirial to start over, and came to the Senate District to apply for transient passage with the Mirialian Ombudsman Office at our Embassy. But they were closed for building repairs that day."

"How did you end up in the gym?"

"Would you believe me if I told you I simply stepped in for a drink of water."

Luke blinked with disbelief.

Andee grinned about it. "I was strolling around, day off, thinking. Trying to figure out what to do next. After coming all that way to find them unusually closed, I was trying to decide if I should take that as a sign that perhaps I _shouldn't_ go home... and suddenly I was thirsty." He grinned a little more, "And there you were."

"Had you ever thought about becoming a Jedi before?"

"Oh, some. You know. Childhood fantasies. I told you about my Great Aunt already. But it's not like it was an option before. Besides, anyone growing up in the culture of the Empire who had the arrogance to believe they had the _right_ to become a professional Force-user - wasn't headed for the Jedi Order anyway."

"True."

"Master, I don't know if this will work, or if it's right for me, of if I can use the Force to make myself valuable at all. I leave that for you to decide. All I know is that I've lost everything, and in that moment I was trying to decide what to do next, I was uncharacteristically thirsty." His smoky eyes settled on Luke with clear confidence and easy acceptance of whatever came next. His story was over.

Luke took this in for a moment, thinking, and angled his head. "If I can get you some time off from work without risking your position, can you stay with us for a couple of days?"

Andee nodded with a smirk. "I'm not in a rush to get back to a deep-fryer when everyone's is just going to smother my dish with a cheap snot sauce anyway."

Luke laughed freely. Andee finally smiled. And Nik poked his head in. "I'm leaving now."

The Jedi Master grinned at them both and flicked his head. "Andee, go with him. I have a mediation you can't come into, but Nik already has a general idea of what a Jediship looks like. I'm sure he can answer some of your questions."


	45. LL6 44 Is This Real?

Yana was confused. Wedge was smart enough not to try to kiss her after that first wonderful date at the Galactic Core Library, but he didn't try to get fresh during the two following dinner dates either. They just chatted through boring topics as they practiced the sign language, or walked along the streets and pointed things they thought were neat or silly, but there was little real conversation.

Chatting on the datalinks after work was a little better, but by not much. The chatting was more in depth, but the topics never grew serious. She explained the status of her brain damage and the pros and cons of the speech implant idea in more detail. He talked about trying to shop for furniture for his new place and complaining about the bureaucratic fiasco of setting up civilian utility services. She had to deal with a weird noise her speeder was making and trying to communicate that to the mechanic who didn't understand sign language. He had to facilitate public transport passes for his crew so they could get to work from their new barracks. (On Coruscant, _nothing_ was in walking distance.)

Once, when they were walking back to his speeder after the second dinner date, she pointed at a strange building shape and signed to ask about its design. Wedge didn't know the answer, but his curiosity spiked enough that he forgot to sign back his thoughts on it. They gazed at the building from the street and he babbled for several minutes about his uneducated guesses, thinking aloud. The moment seemed to brighten him, had him chatty like a boy with a new interest. Yana warmed to listen to it, until he realized he'd been talking, not signing or using the link, and looked to find her watching him. She was smiling to listen, but he still shut himself up with a pouting apology for his rambling.

What she really wanted was some confirmation that this was the real thing, and she wasn't finding one. He wouldn't say anything definitive. Yana approached those two dinner dates with the focus of luring some kind of sign from him. Twice, she made up her mind to ask him bluntly, but the moment she saw him face to face, she fell into a shy giddiness and chickened out. Even with non-important, non-committal topics, she enjoyed his company too much to want to spoil it with 'relationship talk', especially since three dates over three weeks did not quite qualify as a 'relationship'.

 _What do you want from me?_

This was growing dangerous, she realized, because she really liked him. And it got worse every night when the datalink lit up on her bedside table. She would leap into bed and pull the covers over as if to hide this secret addiction to talk to him. She would try to imagine his voice and body language to go with the words he typed, and she tried out her own voice as she typed hers. As the fourth date approached, Yana knew she was going to have to press him on the matter - to give her a straight up yes or no - _Is this real? Am I wasting my time? Are we headed for something wonderful? Or are you still 'not looking for anything serious'?_

It made her stomach flip to think about it.

It was her turn to pick the place for a 'day date' but she failed to find something architecturally nifty close enough for a day trip. Finally, she defaulted to Plan Besh and chose to take him to the Corellian Run Raceway, a theme park full of busy racing distractions that would make it less awkward when they continued not to talk about anything.

Wedge seemed warmly humored to learn her choice of venue, but he seemed distracted today too. He smiled a lot, but each time seemed forced or delayed. And since they were doing a lot of walking to get from booth, to the ale bar, to the restrooms, to the betting kiosk, to the observation platform... there wasn't a lot of room for conversation by sign. When Wedge realized he'd left his end of the datalinks at home, he grew irritable and kicked his own ass for several uncomfortable minutes.

He forced his way out of the mood when they got to the betting kiosk. She bet on the Gogo Water because she liked the color of the racer. He picked the Snotty Brat because the name was funny. They watched one race, both lost, and chuckled together to find something else in this massive theme park to do. Yana began to wonder if he was getting bored with her.

It was when they were strolling across the giant walk-bridge over the ground-car racetrack when she glanced over to find his eyes had lost all their shine, his mouth twitched to a frown, black brows slanted with stress. He was glaring out at something when she wasn't looking. She couldn't tell if it was the race he was looking at, or the pits, or the hundreds of observation platforms across the expanse, or one of the thousands of advertisements flashing and making noise... All she could tell was that he was frowning.

Yana stepped in front of him to stop his stroll and looked him in the eye to sign in his face, " _If the raceway was a bad idea, just say so."_

"Huh?" His moment of sour sadness was pushed aside. He forced a smile, and his tone to lighten. "What are you talking about? Aren't you having a good time?" Then, "Wait. Sorry." He brought up his hands and paused to try remember the signs for what he said.

She lightly slapped his hand that he didn't have to sign back and gave him a deliberate look of _don't bullshit me_.

" _You don't seem to be."_

Wedge sobered. He closed his mouth and tucked his hands into his pockets, nodding with humility. And then faced her with honesty. "It's not you. And it's not the raceway. I..." He sighed again, looking around, and shrugged to admit it. "I had a bad dream last night that I can't seem to shake."

She cocked her head with friendly concern.

He tried to relax and grinned. "Naw, this is good." He looked around the big view and all the colors and people. "This is distracting me. Cheering me up. I'm sorry, I guess I'm kind of out of alignment today." He rubbed the side of his face with his palm.

 _"Want to talk about it?"_

"No." He smiled with truth. "I don't want to spoil the day with it." And then his eyes focused warmly on her. "I want to enjoy this time with you."

She inhaled to speak, her lips twitched, her voice peeked out, but she settled and flushed with embarrassment, frustration.

A true smile spread from ear to ear across his face. He took a tiny step closer and crooned quietly to tease. "Ack. She _almost_ talked."

She sniggered and shined up. _"I can't. Sometimes I forget I can't."_

Someone bumped into him rushing by. Wedge took a step to the rail to get out of the way of foot traffic and leaned an elbow on it. "Well, I'm honored to be one who can help you forget that. I'd like to hear you try sometime. And I don't care how well it comes out. I just want to hear your voice again."

Yana set both elbows on the rail and blushed out at the carnival colors in the view beyond, frustrated. _I miss my voice too,_ she thought.

"Y'know, maybe we should try chatting on the links in front of each other so we can see each other's faces while we're doing it."

She grinned uncomfortably over, nodded, shrugged. Her eyes found his and the butterflies went mad. She sucked in oxygen, overwhelmed with want.

"You know what though?" he postulated, his voice dipped lower and more gentle, "if I were to guess, with your job, you probably have a lot you want to say about a lot of things and already couldn't for years, long before you lost your speech."

Her green eyes dilated on nothing. She nodded with a new discomfort.

"I wish I knew how to help with that," he murmured. "I wish I knew what you want to talk about so I could open that door for you."

She glanced over.

Wedge shrugged, "By CIC bunker rules, if I bring it up, you can talk about it. Right? At least a little?"

 _"Only if it's a confession,"_ she signed, watching him, guarded.

And Wedge stared back for a long beat. He licked his lips and braced himself. "Would you like me to guess?"

She rattled her head, confused. " _Guess about what?"_

Wedge's eyes were direct. His chin firm. "Whatever confession I need to make so we can clear the air; so you're shields are so full power all the time."

Yana dropped her sights back to the view out there and saw none of it. Yes, she wanted him to confess anything necessary so there were no big secrets between them, but she didn't want whatever it was to end this, whatever 'this' was.

He didn't say anything for a long time.

So long that Yana finally looked over to see what he was waiting for. He was still watching her, but sobered, dismayed. Suddenly, he blurted a nervous chuckle and nearly whined. "Hey, I'm sorry, I know it's not your fault that you can't talk, but I need you to shoot me a clue here!"

Her brows scrunched.

He shrugged a hand with defeat and set both elbows on the rail beside her, shaking his head with a wry smile. "I am working hard to figure this out, but I don't know how read you, Yana. I don't know if I'm doing this right. I don't know if I'm fucking this up. I don't know if you're going out with me out of sympathy, or because of some Jedi pressure, or what. Maybe you're doing it because we're the rare few the early crew that actually lived through the whole thing. I don't know. And it's driving me mad. It's keeping me up at night. Except, thinking about you is a parsecs nicer than thinking about them, so I'm not complaining about it." He smiled over with that. "But I've got no sensors on this and I'm flying blind."

Yana watched his expressions during that ramble, working just as hard to read him right now.

He met her eyes, and he drew in a tiny, quick sigh, as if the breath itself was a secret. He whispered as if to himself, "Damn, I wish you could talk to me."

Yana began to understand. Wedge wasn't making a move on her because she wasn't giving him any clear indication that she wanted him to. Yana was never much of a talker in the first place. She didn't chat much with strangers; didn't gossip with friends. This was, in part, what made her such a perfect fit for a top security level clearance. Once she moved up the ranks in the Rebel Command In Control Department, not talking about her day became a requirement, and so she learned to talk even less. The speech impediment only made her natural shy and quiet become positively intense.

Yana realized she was going to have to make the first gesture. She rubbed her lips together to think, angled her head with quavering confidence, tightened her teeth with odd humor, and flushed to say it aloud to him.

"Fuck."

Wedge splashed with laughter. His eyes slammed shut and he buried his red face in his forearms on the rail, shoulders shaking. He was bright as the sun when he lifted his face again. "So you _can_ talk! You've been holding back on me!"

She shook her head, flushing as red as her hair, and signed. _"It's one of the few words I can say."_

He laughed loud and glowed at her. "How many words have you tried?"

She waggled her hand in the air, then tittered, thinking of the other word she could say, and flushed again. Freshly shy, she redirected her eyes to the view and tried to make her stomach stop flipping.

"Well, ma'am," he said with a smooth tone, "you have me at a disadvantage."

Yana looked over with a curl of her lip.

"Do you want me to clear any air?" He seemed to think he knew what she was worried about.

Trapped in his gaze, Yana rubbed her lips, scared of what he'd say.

He began to grin, "Nod or shake your head."

She realized it again, she wasn't giving him a sign. She blushed bashful, sobered, braced herself, and nodded.

He absorbed that, nodded, and murmured with the strength of a pilot flying into battle. "Mind you I'm not in any hurry to ruin this, but I might as well get the beating over with if a beating is due. No reason to waste any more of your time if you've got a shield I can't breach."

Now it was Yana's turn to stiffen. She put her elbows back on the railing and waited as if for a stab wound. She signed coldly, " _Please_."

Wedge sucked in a long breath and lowered his voice even more to say it. "You were in the CIC bunker for half of Hoth and all of Yavin 4, looking for spies for at least some of it. So I know that _you_ know how much I was the very kind of pilot you never wanted to date."

Her shoulders twitched. She breathed tightly. Staring hard at nothing out there, Yana, reluctantly, nodded.

He angled his head with a curious murmur. "And you're going out with me anyway."

She swallowed hard.

His voice came back. "I don't know if this is going to make any sense but..." He scratched his ear and grimaced. "I wasn't supposed to live through that thing. I never expected to. I never saved anything for later, never dreamed of my retirement, or what I'd do after the war. I lived for the 'now' because 'now' was all I'd ever have. The death rates of us pilots... well I don't need to tell you what they were."

She signed without looking over. _"You were an exception to the statistic."_

"I'm- I'm sorry, I didn't get that middle one." He angled to face her, truly wanting to understand what she said.

She faced him and signed it again, spelling it slowly. _"You were an exception to the statistic."_ She added, _"You were the best pilot we had. Better than Skywalker. Better than Solo. Better than Calrissian._ _ **Of course**_ _you were going to live through it."_

He seemed to dismiss the compliment and looked away. "Well, I wasn't planning on it."

More by his tone than his words, Yana began to understand what he meant.

His eyes found her again and, if she could read him at all, she would have sworn his stomach was flipping too.

"I kissed Kess goodbye that night before the launch only because I was saying goodbye _to it all_."

Staring at nothing, Yana's mouth opened, but she still found it difficult to breathe.

"So. Now. All four of us know that all four of us know."

Yana rubbed her eyes with thumb and forefinger. She was more angry than she expected.

Wedge cleared his throat and shrugged. "She was just the last one I saw when I left the pad, really. I mean, if there was never a Luke maybe we could have been something decent someday, but there was." He shrugged again. "As soon as I figured out he wasn't the monk he wanted everyone to think, I never gave her a second thought. She's a shipmate. A soldier. She's good at her job and she works her ass off to take care of our birds; I respect her for that. And she's the one who woke up my wing to have a life and be happy. And I _love_ her for that... But that night, somehow, she seemed to represent a whole lot more for a minute. And I knew I was about to die. I knew it. I just _kne_ w it... That night, I went home, had a drink, laid down in bed and stared at the ceiling thinking about all the things I wish I had done different in my life. All the paths I missed because of the paths I chose. All the cheap fast dating over the years made it so I didn't even _deserve_ a woman like you anymore. I used to think Luke was the idiot for not trying to find someone to keep him company, especially when he was surrounded by targets. But that last couple of months on Yavin 4, I realized... _he_ was the smart one, waiting for the right woman, and _I_ was the idiot. I got so jealous of what they have. Not jealous because he has her, but of what they are together. Even if there wasn't a Luke in the picture, Kess and I never would get that far. And to tell the truth I'm talking about her more right now than she even crossed my mind, but I'm saying it because I don't want you to think there's any residual fodder you need to worry about."

Yana looked over to nod understanding, but she was breathing stiffly. Her shields, as he put it, were still up.

His eyes were direct with truth. "I haven't dated anyone since before the Battle of the Line. Until you."

The way he said it, she believed him. And she let out a small sigh of clear relief.

"And even back when I was still dating, I never lied to them. I didn't want to leave a family behind. I didn't want someone crying over my empty medals. For a long time, I was fine to just be the first toast at a party and join the dead rebel ranks."

 _"What changed?"_

He echoed her sign as if to read it out loud and grinned at the air. "What changed. Heh. A lot of things, I guess. Han changed. Who'd've thought he'd ever settle down! Luke changed. It was a long ramp up for him to get there, but bugging off with Kess after the Battle of the Line proved it. Resigning his commission proved it. And I was already so _sick_ and _tired_ of the cheap dates by then, just knowing he was out there somewhere finally connecting with somebody, somebody who was perfect for him... Luke Skywalker found a mate... I got so jealous that I couldn't have anything like that. That I never got anywhere _close_ to having something like that. But I never _tried_ to have something like that. I went out of my way to make sure nothing could _become_ something like that. But at the same time, I didn't want to leave anyone crying when my name showed up on The List."

The invisible weight in Yana's mind grew lighter with every word he said. She listened intently, but not obviously, working hard not to interrupt that Wedge was finally talking, really _talking_.

She saw his eyes aimed out at the big view of the carnival and races and sky, but he was only seeing memory. She thought he was finished, but he hitched a new grin and continued.

"And then, as if the Force was firing an extra shot in the stomach to make _sure_ I got the message, I had to go down to the CIC bunker to get all the Rogue Group commands transferred."

Yana blushed and smiled so hard she bit her lips to make them close.

He smiled too, but his eyes remained in the air, seeing the memory. "No more cheap dates, Wedge. You just told yourself. No more cheap dates. Don't waste your time, man. Don't do that to yourself anymore. Especially since we're about to go into the Big One. You know you're not going to come back... But my feet just kept walking right across that bunker anyway, just so I could talk to _that_ one." Even with his eyes smiling out at the memory, his index finger came up and jabbed the air to point at her.

She bit her lower lip and flushed.

Wedge smiled down and seemed to read her bashful smile well enough.

She struggled to put her thoughts into words. _"So why didn't you-_ She dropped her hands.

"Why didn't I ask you out that day?" He was grinning.

Trapped in his gaze felt wonderful now.

"Because you deserve better."

She tried to dash that off with humility, but she had to nod agreement.

"Mintalo was a bishwag," Wedge said. "You had every right to put the chocks on every pilot in the galaxy after that." He popped an easy shoulder. "I respected that. And with the Big One coming up, I knew I wouldn't be able to give you what you deserved either. Even I wanted to." He quieted. His eyes returned to the view and saw none of it. That oppressive darkness returned to his demeanor. He barely whispered it. "I wasn't supposed to live."

Yana didn't understand why he would say that, but she was beginning to recognize a recurring theme in it. She watched him with concern as Wedge stared out at the sky as if he was seeing death and angry it didn't take him too. He stiffened, sucking on the inside of his teeth, deep in his thoughts. It was as if he felt surviving was some kind of curse.

Uncertain, she reached over and brushed the back of her finger against his hand hanging from the rail, just to get his attention.

Brown eyes came back to present and found her.

She faced him down, kept his eye, and signed just within vision of the stare. _"You lived."_ And then she started to grin. _"New project."_

His smile spread from ear to ear. His eyes sparkled at the old joke; bittersweet to the memory of the picnic when Kayla and Joanne -may the Force be with their souls- decided that Wedge and Yana was their new project now that Luke and Kess didn't need any more help. They shared a smile over it, which seemed to give Wedge what he needed to settle lower against the rail so he could look her closer in the eye with raw, friendly honesty.

"Look, Yana, I don't deserve you and I know it. And I'm a damn virgin when it comes to 'dating for the long term'. I never had mission plan for this stuff. I never _tried_ to do it right before. And now-now I'm afraid I'm going to screw something up and _I'm not used to that_." He nearly chuckled when he said it, "You terrify me. Because I don't want to make a false step and blow this whole thing over a stupid mistake. I don't want to go too fast and scare you off. I don't want you thinking I'm still in fly-by-night mode. I don't want you to give you the slightest worry that I'm going to do to you what Mintalo did."

He dipped into pleading with her, "But at the same time, I don't know how to read what you want. Talking to you on the datalinks is great because it seems to be the only time we can really talk, because it's the only time we're on the same level of fluid comm but... but I can't see your face because we're klicks apart in two different apartments, so even _then_ I don't know really how you're reacting to what I say," and his words dribbled into a mumble behind a palm rubbing his face hard and chuckling angrily at himself, "and I'm probably screwing it up now just saying all this fodder. I need to shut up."

Wedge hid in his own hand, wishing he could sink into a black hole right now. He was weary of walking on egg shells about this, and only now realized how much he'd been walking on egg shells with her. He liked Yana _-a lot-_ but beyond that, she somehow represented an extra chance at life that he hadn't earned. He lived. And maybe someday after a planetary mass of therapy he could reconcile why the others didn't. But if he screwed up and lost this chance with Yana, what was the point of surviving in the first place?

Wedge wasn't a suicidal kind of guy, so these black visions in his peripheral subconscious didn't make any sense. He was only beginning to glimpse that they were even there, and they seemed to have a magnetic-like pull over everything else happening in his mind. They made him second-guess things on which he was usually confident. Life felt like he was trying to fly with a damper that wouldn't quit, he was always trying to compensate, not finding a balance, and the struggle sent his stomach spinning every time he tried to overcorrect for a hidden gravity-source that he couldn't find or calculate for...

"Wedge."

The sweet sound of her voice - especially to smoothly say _his_ name- punctured the bubble of his momentary self-loathing. He opened his eyes to stare in shock, mouth fallen open, and grew terrified all over again the way her green eyes sparkled back at him. She opened that beautiful mouth...

Eager, Wedge shifted more toward her, overwhelmed with emotion that Yana was speaking.

"I..." She swallowed, rubbed her lips, and, "wa-" stiff breath of determination, "waaaaa ** _n_** t..." she gritted her teeth for a long moment, eyeing him to concentrate, and shoved it out of her mouth, " _th_ is."

Wedge began to smile, but she wasn't done.

"t-t-t-o ..." rub lips, "b-b-b-" She slammed her eyes shut with frustration and looked like she was about to give up.

Wedge was giddy to wait as long as she needed.

She saw that, and forced it out. "be..." She pursed her mouth, winking one eye shut in trying to get the syllable to come out, "weal."

Awestruck, he murmured it back to make sure he understood her right. "You want this to be real." When she nodded, he nodded, and whispered it. "Me too." He lowered his gaze to figure out some profound way he could respond, and saw her hand hanging by the side of her floral, flowing skirt. He found the guts to finally reach for it, just to brush the side of his index finger against the side of hers, and look her in the eyes as he did. "Yana, for the first time... I _am_ looking for something serious... because it's _you_."

Her eyes dilated, but it scared him so much to say that aloud he retreated into a nervous chuckle. "And I'm sorry if that's too fast, or maybe it's too slow, or I'm just being too corny or-"

"Wedge."

It struck his heart like a lightning bolt. Her voice saying his name felt like a shot of a drug. He turned his eyes back to her, to see those green eyes shining, the sunlight in her long hair, the color of her hair band, the flush of her perfect cheeks...

Her hand began to slide into his.

And Wedge found himself kissing her.


End file.
